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(Orlando Sentinel)   If you're a teen boy, you never want your first sexual encounter to be alone in a hotel room with a cross-dressing housekeeper who calls himself "Vanessa"   ( divider line
    More: Florida, Human sexual activity, hotels  
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8521 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Jul 2012 at 9:32 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-07-05 10:13:42 PM  
2 votes:

The One True TheDavid: When I was a bisexual teenager my drag name was Vanessa. But I was the kind of drag queen who liked to swing his penis around: it ain't nearly as "transgressive" if nobody knows you're really a boy. And of course I had some experience with guys my own age who if they weren't gay would still go "a blowjob is a blowjob," and might even reciprocate "just to be fair."

rofltic.comView Full Size
2012-07-05 09:58:14 PM  
2 votes:
The One True TheDavid:

Did I mention I'm considering an eventual campaign to become U.S. Senator from Kentucky? If these people will vote for Rand Paul they'll vote for anything in a Nazi uniform.

I'll be running as "Vanessa, T-Girl of the SS."
2012-07-05 09:34:46 PM  
2 votes:
What if you meet her in a club down in old Soho?
2012-07-05 09:33:42 PM  
2 votes:
Says you, Straightmitter.
2012-07-06 12:19:05 AM  
1 vote:
Lsherm: I try. All you have to do is take two relatively consistent Fark positions, carry them out to an illogical extreme, and then post about it. Even if it's absurd, it does raise the (valid) question of what, exactly, makes the older woman/younger man double standard work. Clearly it's related to gender roles, but but there are limits to that. This was an easy example to get grossed out about because the cross-dresser isn't particularly attractive. What if she was hot? Is the kid "lucky" then?

Teach me your ways, oh Master of trolling. I am your apprentace. I shall let the butthurt flow through me.
2012-07-05 11:05:32 PM  
1 vote:
a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.netView Full Size

Little boy, I'm gonna make you a man.
2012-07-05 10:22:55 PM  
1 vote:
Of course you don't.

You want it to be with your big, burly ex-college football player gym teacher/wrestling coach who always cluelessly insists on using you to demonstrate wrestling moves because you were an early bloomer and bigger than all the other kids which only leads to awkward boners and hours of frustrated masturbation when you think about how it felt to have 200lbs of sweaty, furry man lying on top of your teenage body that has enough hormones bubbling through it to qualify as a biohazard zone. I projecting again?
2012-07-05 09:56:13 PM  
1 vote:
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

What kind of hotel is this?!
2012-07-05 09:38:33 PM  
1 vote:
It's been a long time. I'm 40 years old. I gladly repressed it for decades and YOU've gotta bring it back up subby?
2012-07-05 08:57:03 PM  
1 vote:
Or Maybe You Do.

/whatever floats your boat.
2012-07-05 08:47:48 PM  
1 vote:
According to Fark, you can identify as any gender you want, and a teenage boy's first sexual experience with an older woman is to be encouraged. There's not a problem here, subby. It's like two of Fark's cherished ideals got together for a story.

The only way to make this story better is if the maid was in the country illegal. Bonus points for any distant relation to George Zimmerman.
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