If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(ABC)   7 reasons to be sad Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are split up, or how to write a fluff piece with HTML formatting made like only a drunken stooge could   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 58
    More: Stupid, Katie, Tom Cruise, HTML, Leicester Square, War of the Worlds, eye color, cheekbones  
•       •       •

7253 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 04 Jul 2012 at 12:21 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



58 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-07-04 10:42:33 AM  
Holy crap. I pray that they're merely missing a CSS, and that that's not how they intended the page to look.
 
2012-07-04 11:06:54 AM  
Would it be too much to ask for some animated mailbox gifs?
 
2012-07-04 11:06:54 AM  
#8) She learned everything about sex from a manual

/Manual was their gardener.
 
2012-07-04 11:28:34 AM  
Needs blink tags. On mobile, I can't tell the difference between the story and the ads.
 
2012-07-04 12:26:42 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Would it be too much to ask for some animated mailbox gifs?


And an under construction sign.
 
2012-07-04 12:38:28 PM  
Ugh. Right before reading that article I was praying for sweet death as my latest bout of Korean food poisoning was ravaging my bowels into a pureed mess.

Now I've read the article.

I'm not sure which is worse.
 
2012-07-04 12:45:08 PM  

LarryDan43: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Would it be too much to ask for some animated mailbox gifs?

And an under construction sign.


And waving flags with a Midi of the StarSpanled Banner.
 
2012-07-04 12:48:35 PM  
FTFA:Because now Tom will have to rename his plane. Goodbye, Kiss Me Kate.


He can rename it to Kiss Me Mate
 
2012-07-04 12:56:05 PM  
Saw the frisky tag and knew all I needed to know...
 
2012-07-04 01:01:44 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: #8) She learned everything about sex from a manual

/Manual was their gardener.


Except that Manuel is spelled with an e not an a.
 
2012-07-04 01:01:49 PM  
So which is more of a threat to humanity and national security - Tom now he's loose, or that dip-shiat webmaster??
 
2012-07-04 01:01:51 PM  

The Lurker is in: FTFA:Because now Tom will have to rename his plane. Goodbye, Kiss Me Kate.


He can rename it to Kiss Me Mate


Hey-o!
 
2012-07-04 01:05:39 PM  
Another Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes thread? Haven't we had enough?
 
2012-07-04 01:14:04 PM  

LarryDan43: And an under construction sign.


dstanley: And waving flags with a Midi of the StarSpanled Banner.


YES

AND LOTS OF THIS FONT TO GO AROUND
 
2012-07-04 01:14:25 PM  
I know of bots that can construct a better website than that. They can write better, too.

static.ragamuffinsoul.com
There are any number of reasons to find this disturbing.
 
2012-07-04 01:16:20 PM  

T-Servo: I know of bots that can construct a better website than that. They can write better, too.

[static.ragamuffinsoul.com image 175x175]
There are any number of reasons to find this disturbing.


! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

:D

AWESOME
 
2012-07-04 01:21:04 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: AND LOTS OF THIS FONT TO GO AROUND


Oh sweet God no!
 
2012-07-04 01:23:30 PM  

Megabucks: Another Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes thread? Haven't we had enough?


Slow news week, apparently.

Either that, or the entertainment media is still pushing the fictional "where the did the fairy tale romance go wrong?" angle, as if there are still four people in Elbonia who ever bought it.
 
2012-07-04 01:29:42 PM  

Sid_6.7: Oh sweet God no!


IT'S EITHER THAT OR PAPYRUS

CHOOSE WISELY
 
2012-07-04 01:32:12 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: LarryDan43: And an under construction sign.

dstanley: And waving flags with a Midi of the StarSpanled Banner.

YES

AND LOTS OF THIS FONT TO GO AROUND


hyperkind808.files.wordpress.com
/still fighting this battle, it seems
 
2012-07-04 01:36:54 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: #8) She learned everything about sex from a manual

/Manual was their gardener.


I thought he was a waiter.
static.guim.co.uk
Que?
 
2012-07-04 01:45:33 PM  

titwrench: Except that Manuel is spelled with an e not an a.


I'm aware of that, thank you

/IT WAS A JOKE
 
2012-07-04 01:52:47 PM  

T-Servo: hyperkind808.files.wordpress.com
/still fighting this battle, it seems


Never give up! NEVER SURRENDER!
 
2012-07-04 02:10:30 PM  
Hey now, even we drunken stooges have some standards.
 
2012-07-04 02:20:50 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: titwrench: Except that Manuel is spelled with an e not an a.

I'm aware of that, thank you

/IT WAS A JOKE


Jokes are supposed to be funny.
 
2012-07-04 02:57:35 PM  
Why does everybody hate Comic Sans?
 
2012-07-04 02:58:14 PM  

T-Servo: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: LarryDan43: And an under construction sign.

dstanley: And waving flags with a Midi of the StarSpanled Banner.

YES

AND LOTS OF THIS FONT TO GO AROUND

[hyperkind808.files.wordpress.com image 369x473]
/still fighting this battle, it seems


Hey, it was good enough for Dan Gilbert, and he's a multi-kazillionaire!
 
2012-07-04 02:58:17 PM  
Here's a more readable version.
 
2012-07-04 03:13:03 PM  

Solid Muldoon: Why does everybody hate Comic Sans?


Because it's cool to be a hater.
 
2012-07-04 03:21:42 PM  
That site never renders at all in chrome (for me at least)
 
2012-07-04 03:23:35 PM  

Solid Muldoon: Why does everybody hate Comic Sans?


Because some people have no joy in their souls.

img696.imageshack.us


Torrent of Rubbish: Hey, it was good enough for Dan Gilbert, and he's a multi-kazillionaire!


He's a nathonfillionaire!!!


Pincy: Because it's cool to be a hater.


Not against Comic Sans.

Not like this. NOT LIKE THIS.
 
2012-07-04 03:38:30 PM  
5. Because now Tom will have to rename his plane. Goodbye, Kiss Me Kate.

He can call it "Kiss Me Hardy," Lord Nelson's last words.

/and then start dating Tom Hardy
 
2012-07-04 04:04:21 PM  
It needs a little geo....
 
2012-07-04 04:06:37 PM  
 
2012-07-04 04:09:24 PM  
Enough with this dude already, we need more stories about Matlock being dead now.
 
2012-07-04 04:26:49 PM  

Bonanza Jellybean: 5. Because now Tom will have to rename his plane. Goodbye, Kiss Me Kate.

He can call it "Kiss Me Hardy," Lord Nelson's last words.

/and then start dating Tom Hardy


Clever. Though even in his crackhead days Tom Hardy would probably have been smart enough to know better than to get involved with Tom Cruise and his crazy.
 
2012-07-04 04:30:50 PM  
As much as I can't stand Tom Cruise since he did the couch jumping thing and haven't seen any of his movies since then, the preview for Jack Reacher looks pretty good, like he's an alternate Punisher.It also reminds me of his character from Collateral. I may see this one, though I still don't care for him and his religion.
 
2012-07-04 04:32:06 PM  

RoyHobbs22: Enough with this dude already, we need more stories about Matlock being dead now.


TV Land's running an Andy Griffith Show marathon this weekend.

Totally there.
 
2012-07-04 05:06:00 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: RoyHobbs22: Enough with this dude already, we need more stories about Matlock being dead now.

TV Land's running an Andy Griffith Show marathon this weekend.

Totally there.


nice. i will be there as well.
 
2012-07-04 05:15:12 PM  

Lurk sober post drunk: nice. i will be there as well.


Good deal - enjoy!
 
2012-07-04 05:54:08 PM  
ftfa:

7. Because I was charmed by the couch jumping.


Shoulda lead off with that one, then we could have ignored the hell out of you.

/Subby; I hope you die tonight in the colors of red, white and blue.
 
2012-07-04 05:58:12 PM  

Teaser: That site never renders at all in chrome (for me at least)


Same here. Though it doesn't seem like we're really missing all that much.
 
2012-07-04 06:01:49 PM  
As a drunken stooge, I resemble, regret, forget it....
 
2012-07-04 06:51:37 PM  

foo monkey: Needs blink tags. On mobile, I can't tell the difference between the story and the ads.


It ain't much better on a laptop.

/Confession: DNRTFA, clicked the link only to see the formatting.
 
2012-07-04 07:18:25 PM  
7 reasons to be sad Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are split up, or how to write a fluff piece with HTML formatting made like only a drunken stooge could

*rolls eyes*

[welcome to fark.jpg]
 
2012-07-04 08:15:02 PM  
Coincidence?
www.disneylandclub33.com
 
2012-07-04 10:15:21 PM  
Yikes, the "journalist" was charmed by the Oprah couch jumping event. Charmed? To me that was the Rosetta Stone telling us in three languages that it was a sham marriage. It was so disingenuous and over the top he might as well just gone on a date with Anderson Cooper after the taping.
 
2012-07-04 10:47:02 PM  
They could have just saved us all the trouble of trying to weed through all of that...

www.mcli.dist.maricopa.edubestanimations.comwebspace.webring.comTHIS WEBSITE IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION! webspace.webring.combestanimations.comwww.mcli.dist.maricopa.edu

E-mail the Webmaster: CLICK HERE www.animationplayhouse.com

SIGN OUR GUESTBOOK! www.animationplayhouse.com ~~ Best viewed with Netscape Navigator or Internet Explorer www.animated-gifs.eu
 
2012-07-04 10:59:29 PM  

EchoMike: They could have just saved us all the trouble of trying to weed through all of that...

[www.mcli.dist.maricopa.edu image 50x50][bestanimations.com image 64x64][webspace.webring.com image 80x100]THIS WEBSITE IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION! [webspace.webring.com image 80x100][bestanimations.com image 64x64][www.mcli.dist.maricopa.edu image 50x50]

E-mail the Webmaster: CLICK HERE [www.animationplayhouse.com image 95x60]

SIGN OUR GUESTBOOK! [www.animationplayhouse.com image 101x93] ~~ Best viewed with Netscape Navigator or Internet Explorer [www.animated-gifs.eu image 66x23]


For a second I thought I was at Drudge Report
 
das
2012-07-04 11:42:41 PM  

EchoMike: They could have just saved us all the trouble of trying to weed through all of that...

[www.mcli.dist.maricopa.edu image 50x50][bestanimations.com image 64x64][webspace.webring.com image 80x100]THIS WEBSITE IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION! [webspace.webring.com image 80x100][bestanimations.com image 64x64][www.mcli.dist.maricopa.edu image 50x50]

E-mail the Webmaster: CLICK HERE [www.animationplayhouse.com image 95x60]

SIGN OUR GUESTBOOK! [www.animationplayhouse.com image 101x93] ~~ Best viewed with Netscape Navigator or Internet Explorer [www.animated-gifs.eu image 66x23]


Damn. A Geocities flash-back!!!!
 
Displayed 50 of 58 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report