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(Jezebel)   "Women's Ten Biggest Complaints About Men's Ten Biggest Complaints About Women." Or, how to create an internet flame war the likes of which God has never seen   (jezebel.com) divider line 618
    More: Interesting, flame wars, gender stereotypes, eHarmony, complaints  
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19213 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Jul 2012 at 10:41 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-03 11:42:06 AM

Jument: The one lesson I've learned is that wimmin sometimes just want to rant angrily at you and that when you do you MUST appear to listen and make sympathetic noises. You MUST NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES explain how to fix the problem. EVER. Not even if she appears to be asking you


Yeah. I will absolutely never understand why I have to appear to be listening. It's like, if you don't want my opinion, and just want to say stuff out loud, you can do that by yourself easily enough. I do it all the time.
They're just playing out some sadistic need to pass their suffering on to you because they know how much it frustrates you to have a solution to a problem but be prevented from implementing it. The joy they derive from your broken will makes them forget about whatever BS they were whining about.
 
2012-07-03 11:43:18 AM
Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?
 
2012-07-03 11:44:05 AM

Kazrath: Posts like these make me wonder why any male would want a woman in the first place. Seriously, why the fark would you bring up something that is not a problem?

Woman: I need to fix the car
Man: What is broken
Woman: Nothing is broken
Man: ???????


Well, you know it's... I mean more or less... Yeah, vaginas. Pretty much. You know. Vaginas are pretty good. So I'm willing to put up with quite a bit.

Professor Henry Higgins: [singing] "Women are irrational, that's all there is to that! Their heads are full of cotton, hay, and rags. They're nothing but exasperating, irritating, vacillating, calculating, agitating, maddening and infuriating hags!"

Me: "Yea man, but... Vaginas. You know? Vaginas."

Professor Henry Higgins: "Well, now that you put it that way... Right on."
 
2012-07-03 11:44:39 AM

padraig: Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?


Was told to man up.
 
2012-07-03 11:44:48 AM

The Singing Bush: I think it's hilarious that she doesn't follow number 9. My wife is terrible about this -

Me: Where do you want to go to dinner?
Her: I don't know, I'm not sure what I want
Me: How about here, or here, or here, or here, or here?
Her: No, none of those sound good.
Me: Well what do you want?
Her: Why can't YOU make a decision?
Me - head asplode


My boyfriend does this same exact thing. Drives me nuts.

Which is the point of TFA, once you get past all the venting. Most of these are complaints about human behaviors, not male/female.
 
2012-07-03 11:44:56 AM

God Is My Co-Pirate: 1) We want a place with the right atmosphere to suit our mood (and our clothes and transport)
2) We want a menu that's right for our food/guilt issues (if I'm feeling fat, I don't want BBQ, but I also want you to be happy so I make you pick)
3) We want you to pick because it means you've put thought into it - planning something is more romantic than just ending up wherever's closest
4) If we have kids or not a lot of money, so we're not going out too often, it increases the pressure to have everything go perfectly

I'm not saying it's not crazy, but there you go. Just say "I've heard there's a great new place just opened. I've booked us a table for Friday."


You realize that this is all passive-agressive bullshiat, right?

You literally just said "I want you to read my mind, know all of my thoughts and feelings without me expressing them, then make a decision based on that so I don't take any of the blame if it ends poorly."

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the insight, but holy shiat. Do you realize what an untenable position that puts your partner in? You've literally given him 10 different opportunities to fail and no guidance on how not to.
 
2012-07-03 11:44:58 AM

MrBallou: scottydoesntknow: mitchcumstein1: scottydoesntknow: Sounds like Lindy West just needs a good dicking

Have at it, she's all yours.

Yeesh.

Hey hey hey now, I'm not falling on that grenade. I just said she needs A dicking, not MY dicking.

Yeah, how would 15 seconds of discomfort help her, anyway?


Oh SNAP.jpg
 
2012-07-03 11:45:45 AM

fortheloveofgod: WhippingBoy: Savage Bacon: Woah! Gotta love the use of the ol' CAPS LOCK to get a point across. Really helps your argument, lady. I can feel your exasperation through your written word... Such angst!

One of the first thing I learned about relationships and the difference between men and women had to do with sympathizing vs. problem-solving. As a man, if I start talking to my male friends about an issue I'm having, it's pretty much advice solicitation on my part. If my gf comes to me with an issue, it's usually just to vent, so I let her vent. If she actually needs any advice, I wait for her to ask for it, because apparently giving advice really gets in the way of a good venting session.

Yep. Took me 10 years to learn this. Confused the hell out of me. My wife would come to me, complaining about some relatively minor thing. I'd present her with a logical, clear-cut solution that would be guaranteed to solve her problem, and she would just get angry at me.

Exactly! Took me 5 years into my marriage to learn that. 5 years of hearing about the "communication problems" that I had. Finally after all that time she came right out and told me "I don't want to hear the solution to my problem, I just want you to listen!". I was like, "Oh, I can do that". Now it's just nod and agree. Been married 30 years now and haven't had the communication problem argument since! I don't get it (why wouldn't you want to hear how to resolve your problem?) but hey, whatever . . .


Maybe because we need to verbalizing about a problem in order to get it out of our system and not because we're looking for a "fix".

Not being a smart ass, honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.
 
2012-07-03 11:45:57 AM
My ex is bi-polar. Towards the end of our relationship he kept insisting that I get on psychotropic medication:

Ex: I got on meds, you need to, too!
Me: Why do I need to get on meds, ex? I'm not depressed, I don't fly off the handle screaming or throwing temper tantrums, why?
Ex walks away and drops it...

The next week:
Ex: You farking psycho! You need to get on some anti-depressants.
Me: Dude, I'm not depressed. I have a great life; what are you going on? What have I done to show you that I'm depressed?
Ex: Goddammit Cape!!! For one week out of every month you cry at the drop of a hat!

...
 
2012-07-03 11:46:07 AM

R.A.Danny: padraig: Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?

Was told to man up.


Exactly. They can biatch, we're expected to deal with it.

Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.

Don't you love it how if you complain about how women behave you're nothing but a misogynistic asshole too?
 
2012-07-03 11:46:17 AM

padraig: Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?


If you try this, then you have "anger issues" or you "are too negative about things". Therefore, you are an asshole.
 
2012-07-03 11:46:59 AM

urbangirl: honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.


www.glasswings.com
 
2012-07-03 11:47:00 AM

groppet: Who has the popcorn?


i1181.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-03 11:47:09 AM

padraig: Benevolent Misanthrope: padraig: I had never seen such contempt for a whole gender before in my life.

You don't get out much do you? This is generally the message of TV, movies, popular culture in general. Watch "Miss Representation" sometime to get an idea of how pervasive it is.

No no no... this is my fault actually. I haven't managed to fully express the full horror of that book, and its utter contempt for men.
At one point, it actually suggests that men routinely play with their excrements.


I have a little set of sails on masts made of toothpicks. I can turn my stool into a fleet of square riggers and stage little sea battles in the toilet bowl. It is most gratifying.
 
2012-07-03 11:47:19 AM

Strategeryz0r: Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.


You forgot tits.
 
2012-07-03 11:47:37 AM

God Is My Co-Pirate: Okay, you want to knnow what's going on in our heads during this scenario?

1) We want a place with the right atmosphere to suit our mood (and our clothes and transport)
2) We want a menu that's right for our food/guilt issues (if I'm feeling fat, I don't want BBQ, but I also want you to be happy so I make you pick)
3) We want you to pick because it means you've put thought into it - planning something is more romantic than just ending up wherever's closest
4) If we have kids or not a lot of money, so we're not going out too often, it increases the pressure to have everything go perfectly

I'm not saying it's not crazy, but there you go. Just say "I've heard there's a great new place just opened. I've booked us a table for Friday."


We know what's going through your heads. The point is that what you just described is unfair and deliberately antagonistic.

1) We aren't psychic. If you tell us to pick, you have given us zero information from which to divine your mood. You have, in fact, told US to pick, which implies that you don't HAVE a mood that would suggest a restaurant.

2) You just stated that you had a preference, but you didn't want to say it, because you want us to psychically guess the right choice. This is not just unfair, it's an emotional minefield you have DELIBERATELY lain, just to see if we blow ourselves up.

3) You want the guy to pick, to show he's put thought into planning something romantic, but you of course don't need to make any such plans or efforts. Men don't like playing this game because of the above two issues; you have created an emotional minefield, where there's a delicate route to what's "romantic", but dozens of little mines that change every moment based on current mood and such that will blow everything the fark up. Planned a romantic evening at a nice Italian place you know she likes? Whoops, she's feeling fat today because she had ice cream at lunch and didn't tell you, so now she's going to get angry that you're taking her to for even more fattening food. This is why we hate this game and ask where you want to go, because from a list of 30 restaurants, 28 will result in a fight. And the next time we go to dinner, the 2 "right" restaurants will be completely different.

4) If the guy is the one making the decisions, as you're describing, then ALL of this pressure is being placed on his shoulders, with the added pressure of not tripping any of our emotional mines that will set off a fight. Which is why we'd just rather you say you want to go to the Thai place on Main St. without making us guess that that's where you really want to go tonight for a whole bunch of little reasons you haven't told us about.
 
Biv
2012-07-03 11:48:03 AM

Strategeryz0r: R.A.Danny: padraig: Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?

Was told to man up.

Exactly. They can biatch, we're expected to deal with it.

Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.

Don't you love it how if you complain about how women behave you're nothing but a misogynistic asshole too?


Don't forget about boobs, they also have boobs.
 
2012-07-03 11:48:16 AM

ha-ha-guy: wraithmare: Yep. Mrs. W. mentions an issue and seems a little upset. So I run through various solutions that seem quite logical to solve the issue. She gets upset that I'm trying to fix things, then I get upset she isn't listening and then it gets all quiet. Give it an hour, it's all good. See, I keep thinking like an engineer and trying to fix things. That is apparently the wrong answer.

The other thing to consider is if Mrs. W is really worked up over an issue it means she's spent hours (if not days) wrestling with the issue. When you fix it 5 minutes after hearing it, you make her feel really stupid. She's already emotional and now you made her feel stupid, bad things happen from there. The best bet is to be sympathetic and after a bit ask some leading questions to start getting her to realize the solution to her problems.



I don't have that kind of time to ask questions, I have a golf game to get to! I kid.

Of course, if I asked earlier what was wrong, she says, "nothing, I'm just tired" when in fact she's stewing on the issue. Mostly I've just learned to ignore the whole thing and tread lightly. Eventually she tells me or she won't. Takes two to communicate.
 
2012-07-03 11:48:28 AM

Blink: Ah, another article by a "strong" woman who exudes her strength through irrational lashing-outs, shouting down anything she disagrees with, and generally writing one of the most befuddling, disorganized articles fathomable.

I wish strong (for both men and women) was synonymous with "quietly competent"


She's irrational? Why because she's a woman? Your misogyny is showing.
 
2012-07-03 11:48:29 AM

BurnShrike: urbangirl: honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.

[www.glasswings.com image 640x480]


t3.gstatic.com

I dont care who you are............
 
2012-07-03 11:48:37 AM
Being male, I'd like to hear a Female response to Mens Rules for Women

So, ladies, how about it?
 
2012-07-03 11:49:06 AM
I must live in bizzaro world. The last dude I was in a relationship with would get mad because I spent too much time watching sports and drinking beer. He also gave me an ultimatum; get married and have babies or gtfo. I gtfo.

/I don't do relationships anymore.
//Dudes be crazy, yo!
///The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything. Nietzsche
 
2012-07-03 11:49:22 AM

Savage Bacon: Had this exact thing happen to me a few times. The key here is to understand the difference between "suggestions" and "decisions". I believe she got angry because you merely *suggested* places, instead of deciding right then and there where you would go for dinner. Of course, deciding outright might still lead to her being unsatisfied with your choice, but at least you made one and next time she'll be more motivated to actually express her preferences. For even better results, mention something you actually like about the restaurant where you wish to eat, as that extra motivation can expedite the whole process.


Nope, doesn't work that way at all. If it does with your wife, you are lucky. All that results in is her sitting in a restaurant unhappily - and mad that you selfishly just picked where you wanted to go without considering her. And the next time you will still go through the same routine.
 
2012-07-03 11:49:30 AM

urbangirl: Maybe because we need to verbalizing about a problem in order to get it out of our system and not because we're looking for a "fix".

Not being a smart ass, honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.


Male viewpoint: verbalize it to someone else. We're not your sounding board. When you're ready to actually deal with the problem, come find us.
 
Biv
2012-07-03 11:49:36 AM

R.A.Danny: Strategeryz0r: Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.

You forgot tits.


*shakes tiny, misogynist fist.*
 
2012-07-03 11:49:49 AM

Biv: Strategeryz0r: R.A.Danny: padraig: Okay, just for the fun of it, but : has any man here ever tried to turn the tables on their s.o. .? By that, I mean rant endlessly about your own problem of the day, not letting her a word in edgewise, and getting offended if she offers a suggestion ?

Was told to man up.

Exactly. They can biatch, we're expected to deal with it.

Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.

Don't you love it how if you complain about how women behave you're nothing but a misogynistic asshole too?

Don't forget about boobs, they also have boobs.


Yes but without the vagina what fun would the boobs be? i love boobs as much as the next guy, but without the other part the boobs are just there for looks.
 
2012-07-03 11:50:11 AM

Biv: glass_ibis: FYI
When men get emotional their logic centers turn off - this is not so with women.


Okay, everyone point and laugh at Glassy.


Yes, it is funny that he thinks women are logical.
 
2012-07-03 11:50:12 AM

BurnShrike: urbangirl: honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.

[www.glasswings.com image 640x480]


That is a horrible sink. ALL that space, and it's so small? The sink itself should be twice as big, and the faucet should be taller. I can't tell what it's made of, but if it's not stainless steel - it should be. I can totally understand why the woman who uses that sink is PO'd.
 
2012-07-03 11:50:31 AM

Yanks_RSJ:
It must be. One of my exes was having an issue with her boss that essentially came down to her "being mean" or some crap like that. Every day I got to hear a complete rundown of what her boss did to her, and every day I said, "you should go talk to her" or something to that effect.

Finally, I got fed up with it and just said, "look, I'm not one of your girlfriends, if you don't actually want my advice, don't come to me with the same problem every single day when you haven't once attempted my suggested solution. Be an adult and talk to your boss or leave me out of it."

Of course that brought on the waterworks and a 3-hour fight about how I'm a jerk who can't be sympathetic. Which I guess was true, we don't have that instinct, at least not when there's a logical solution to a pitiful "problem".


What I don't get is the insistence of re-narrating the entirety of events while we were apart. When she asks how my day was, I say "OK" and move on unless it involved something on par with someone being fired or taken away in an ambulance.
Why the hell would anyone want to relive their work day...ESPECIALLY if it sucked so badly? And why is it not taken as a hint when I don't elaborate on my daily garbage that since I don't want to hear myself talk about highlights from my own day, why would I want to hear about each of the 600 minutes we were apart?
 
2012-07-03 11:50:55 AM

R.A.Danny: gamergirl23: The Singing Bush: gamergirl23: The Singing Bush: I think it's hilarious that she doesn't follow number 9. My wife is terrible about this -

Me: Where do you want to go to dinner?
Her: I don't know, I'm not sure what I want
Me: How about here, or here, or here, or here, or here?
Her: No, none of those sound good.
Me: Well what do you want?
Her: Why can't YOU make a decision?
Me - head asplode

This is why one should have a default food/drink/activity. If you don't care but someone really wants you to pick, you just pick that to politely prevent them from going insane.

Tried that - she'll come back with "but we just did that like 6 months ago"

I don't know. Have her keep a list of her favorite restaurants in the car with the dates you last visited them?

My rule: If you make me choose where to go, you shut up about where we're going.

Otherwise I'd be happy to work with you towards picking a place, but don't tell me to choose unless you're ready to shut up and eat some damn BBQ.


Ever just throw your hands up in the air and say "well fark it, you eat where you want; I'm going to the BBQ joint"? I did that once with an ex, and followed through. Took my time and had a lovely meal by myself. God damn there was glorious drama when I got home. She was one of those semi-fat chicks who get cranky when they're hungry, and she deliberately sat there not eating the whole time to enhance the freak out. I told her it was probably a good thing she skipped dinner and then went to play video games while she screeched. Healthiest. Relationship. Ever.
 
2012-07-03 11:51:22 AM

robbiex0r: Savage Bacon: Woah! Gotta love the use of the ol' CAPS LOCK to get a point across. Really helps your argument, lady. I can feel your exasperation through your written word... Such angst!

One of the first thing I learned about relationships and the difference between men and women had to do with sympathizing vs. problem-solving. As a man, if I start talking to my male friends about an issue I'm having, it's pretty much advice solicitation on my part. If my gf comes to me with an issue, it's usually just to vent, so I let her vent. If she actually needs any advice, I wait for her to ask for it, because apparently giving advice really gets in the way of a good venting session.

Cannot be overstated. I still get trapped offering advice, when all I should be doing is listening. It's just so hard to watch someone suffer when the answer to their problems is so simple... Why wouldn't you want to help them?


Man, why it's taken me SOO long to figure this out is beyond me.
The difficulty I have, is that I am a fixer by nature, it's what my brain does.
So, when I'm trying to just sit there and let her vent (knowing that I can't fix whatever it is),
I get bored because I can predict what she's going to say, and she goes on, and on, and on about it.
I run out of ways to say that 'she's right, all her co-workers are assholes and out to get her.'
I can't even say things that would lead her to solve her own problem(there is generally no real solution, just venting),
because I get tired of hearing about the same shiat go on and on and on....
I guess I just need some more one-liners to make it seem that I'm still listening..
 
2012-07-03 11:51:50 AM

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Jesus, these threads are a GOLDMINE for my ignore list.

Write something inflammatory. DO IT.


SOMETHING INFLAMMATORY

/am I ignored yet?
 
2012-07-03 11:51:57 AM

Savage Bacon: Woah! Gotta love the use of the ol' CAPS LOCK to get a point across. Really helps your argument, lady. I can feel your exasperation through your written word... Such angst!

One of the first thing I learned about relationships and the difference between men and women had to do with sympathizing vs. problem-solving. As a man, if I start talking to my male friends about an issue I'm having, it's pretty much advice solicitation on my part. If my gf comes to me with an issue, it's usually just to vent, so I let her vent. If she actually needs any advice, I wait for her to ask for it, because apparently giving advice really gets in the way of a good venting session.


There are female problem-solvers, and male sympathizers. I (an engineer) dated a very emotional artist for a stint. He always had issues. Always. And I'd make suggestions that would either go no where or turn into excuses as to why they wouldn't work. When I stopped offering advice, suddenly I didn't care about his problems (which to me weren't problems).

That said, anyone who says "all males are like this" or "all females are like this" (except for the penis and vagina part) get what they deserve.
 
2012-07-03 11:51:58 AM

fortheloveofgod: The Singing Bush: I think it's hilarious that she doesn't follow number 9. My wife is terrible about this -

Me: Where do you want to go to dinner?
Her: I don't know, I'm not sure what I want
Me: How about here, or here, or here, or here, or here?
Her: No, none of those sound good.
Me: Well what do you want?
Her: Why can't YOU make a decision?
Me - head asplode


After 10 minutes
Her : I don't want to eat here, there or the other place, I'm tired of it.
Me : Fark it I'm going home you decide what YOU want to eat
Her : Why do you have to be upset about it?
Me : FACEPALM
 
2012-07-03 11:52:17 AM

BurnShrike: urbangirl: honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.

[www.glasswings.com image 640x480]


heh.
 
2012-07-03 11:52:21 AM
1) Crying is not a solution. Grow a pair of ovaries.

2) Don't talk about problems if you have no intention of fixing them and aren't soliciting advice.

3) Don't expect me to guess correctly when you give me a choice with a secret 'correct' answer than will make you happy.

4) Lady in public, whore in the bedroom.

Just at least CONSIDER those four guidelines, and you'll be better than a big hunk of the female half of the population.
 
2012-07-03 11:52:29 AM

Nogale: BurnShrike: urbangirl: honestly trying to offer a female viewpoint.

[www.glasswings.com image 640x480]

That is a horrible sink. ALL that space, and it's so small? The sink itself should be twice as big, and the faucet should be taller. I can't tell what it's made of, but if it's not stainless steel - it should be. I can totally understand why the woman who uses that sink is PO'd.


Typical woman. Complaining about the picture I chose to make a joke. I did a quick search and grabbed the first one I saw that displayed what I wanted it to.

/i completely agree with your points though
 
2012-07-03 11:52:39 AM

Joshie: She sounds fat.


She IS fat. Fatty Fatfat McFatterson.
 
2012-07-03 11:53:10 AM
Every ounce of social stress and drama myself or any man I know has had to cope with has had a woman at its core, a woman who was driving the drama, generating it, and perpetuating it.

I swear it really IS why men die earlier than women.

They really aren't worth the trouble. Our genetic imperative is sex, and that's really about as far as it should go. Anything more eventually shortens our lives and occasionally makes one of us homicidal.

Perhaps when they evolve the ability to take things in stride instead of making every stray thought or fear an emotional obsession the risk will be worth the reward.
 
Biv
2012-07-03 11:53:46 AM

Nately's Whore: Savage Bacon: Woah! Gotta love the use of the ol' CAPS LOCK to get a point across. Really helps your argument, lady. I can feel your exasperation through your written word... Such angst!

One of the first thing I learned about relationships and the difference between men and women had to do with sympathizing vs. problem-solving. As a man, if I start talking to my male friends about an issue I'm having, it's pretty much advice solicitation on my part. If my gf comes to me with an issue, it's usually just to vent, so I let her vent. If she actually needs any advice, I wait for her to ask for it, because apparently giving advice really gets in the way of a good venting session.

There are female problem-solvers, and male sympathizers. I (an engineer) dated a very emotional artist for a stint. He always had issues. Always. And I'd make suggestions that would either go no where or turn into excuses as to why they wouldn't work. When I stopped offering advice, suddenly I didn't care about his problems (which to me weren't problems).

That said, anyone who says "all males are like this" or "all females are like this" (except for the penis and vagina part) get what they deserve.


I believe the phrase is "the exception proves the rule."
 
2012-07-03 11:53:51 AM

Thorak: 1) We aren't psychic. If you tell us to pick, you have given us zero information from which to divine your mood.


www.finifter.com
oh boy
 
2012-07-03 11:54:05 AM

serial_crusher: Ever just throw your hands up in the air and say "well fark it, you eat where you want; I'm going to the BBQ joint"? I did that once with an ex, and followed through. Took my time and had a lovely meal by myself. God damn there was glorious drama when I got home. She was one of those semi-fat chicks who get cranky when they're hungry, and she deliberately sat there not eating the whole time to enhance the freak out. I told her it was probably a good thing she skipped dinner and then went to play video games while she screeched. Healthiest. Relationship. Ever.


upload.wikimedia.org

++1
 
2012-07-03 11:54:31 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
I'm surprised this wasn't on the list.

I'm out numbered 3-1 at home, so this is a re-occurring issue.

/married peoples' problems
 
2012-07-03 11:54:53 AM

Nana's Vibrator: What I don't get is the insistence of re-narrating the entirety of events while we were apart. When she asks how my day was, I say "OK" and move on unless it involved something on par with someone being fired or taken away in an ambulance.
Why the hell would anyone want to relive their work day...ESPECIALLY if it sucked so badly? And why is it not taken as a hint when I don't elaborate on my daily garbage that since I don't want to hear myself talk about highlights from my own day, why would I want to hear about each of the 600 minutes we were apart?


Pretty much all of our day ends up on the cutting room floor, while they fired their entire mental editorial staff so we're left to sift through hours of worthless material in search of something relevant that may not even exist.
 
2012-07-03 11:55:10 AM

Biv: R.A.Danny: Strategeryz0r: Yet another absurd female double standard. Seriously if it weren't for vagina's we'd all be gay.

You forgot tits.

*shakes tiny, misogynist fist.*


There's usually two of them anyway.
 
2012-07-03 11:55:19 AM

Death_Poot: robbiex0r: Savage Bacon: Woah! Gotta love the use of the ol' CAPS LOCK to get a point across. Really helps your argument, lady. I can feel your exasperation through your written word... Such angst!

One of the first thing I learned about relationships and the difference between men and women had to do with sympathizing vs. problem-solving. As a man, if I start talking to my male friends about an issue I'm having, it's pretty much advice solicitation on my part. If my gf comes to me with an issue, it's usually just to vent, so I let her vent. If she actually needs any advice, I wait for her to ask for it, because apparently giving advice really gets in the way of a good venting session.

Cannot be overstated. I still get trapped offering advice, when all I should be doing is listening. It's just so hard to watch someone suffer when the answer to their problems is so simple... Why wouldn't you want to help them?

I've heard this said before from my uncle (now sadly deceased), and believe me it works....

"I'm your husband, not your sponsor"............


This. Many women (not all, but probably most) want someone to sit there and listen to them biatch. They don't want solutions, because they (the women) have no intention of solving the "problem." It's either not actually a problem, just some personality conflict for which there is no real solution, or it's some situation in which the fault is almost entirely theirs but they refuse to acknowledge it, so they vent to someone who doesn't realize this and the offered solutions would not do any good because the complainer is leaving out information that would make her look bad.

Many women do not have the guts to confront someone directly or just come right out and say there's a problem. They just seeth about it and never actually resolve anything. Because to say anything out loud to a person you're having a problem with (at work, for example) would be "rude." It's not rude, however, to biatch about it to everyone else behind that person's back.

Women call this "communication." They seem to think they're better at it than men are. They're wrong. Not that they'll ever admit it.
 
2012-07-03 11:56:28 AM

hubiestubert: miss diminutive: Christian Bale: This article just shows how men aren't allowed to have ANY complaints about women, otherwise you are a misogynist, and wrong. Only women can complain about men -- all men, in one big generalization -- and expect to be have their complaints not just taken seriously, but acknowledged as fact. And if you don't acknowledge those complaints? You're a misogynist, and wrong.

Yes.

And?

Luckily, I've been married before. I'm used to being wrong 100% of the time, and soldiering on.


That's why I'm not married anymore. I'd rather be right than married.
 
2012-07-03 11:56:32 AM

Benevolent Misanthrope: padraig: I had never seen such contempt for a whole gender before in my life.

You don't get out much do you? This is generally the message of TV, movies, popular culture in general. Watch "Miss Representation" sometime to get an idea of how pervasive it is.


College/Universities are the worse. There is probably no hostile place for men particularly white men than modern academia. Gender studies anyone?
 
2012-07-03 11:56:45 AM
I think a lot of the problems between men and women stem from the fact that women secretly hate all other women. They play mind games with each other so much growing up that when it comes time to deal with a man they have no FARKING clue why he doesn't like to play mind games too.
 
2012-07-03 11:56:49 AM

Jixa: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 640x853]
I'm surprised this wasn't on the list.

I'm out numbered 3-1 at home, so this is a re-occurring issue.

/married peoples' problems


Aaargghhh! Why are women like this? Re-occurring is NOT a word!
It's recurring!
/now we're not talking about toilet seats. Straight outta yer playbook.
 
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