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(Neatorama)   If you thought the only function of the appendix was to rupture and ensure that your doctor could rent that house in the Hamptons, think again   (neatorama.com) divider line 52
    More: Interesting, Hamptons, industrialisations, severance, census tract  
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8337 clicks; posted to Geek » on 03 Jul 2012 at 1:06 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-03 11:52:30 AM
Now we have Activia!

/said with a twinkling smile
//and a sound effect
 
2012-07-03 01:20:18 PM
FTA: "populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other"

/fap
 
2012-07-03 01:20:32 PM
FTFA: But in earlier centuries, when vast tracts of land ...

Here come the Monty Python jokes.

/NTTAWWT
 
2012-07-03 01:21:34 PM
It's the bomb shelter of the bowels.
 
2012-07-03 01:21:47 PM
FTA: This function has been made obsolete by modern, industrialised society; populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other, allowing gut organisms to regrow without help from the appendix, the researchers said.


Can someone explain to me how this works, because the only mental image I'm getting is something straight out of a japanese fetish video, and it ain't pretty.
 
2012-07-03 01:29:19 PM
Hate to be that guy, but this story long ago crossed the line from news to history.

Link
 
2012-07-03 01:35:54 PM
Being a science journalist must be the easiest job in the world. Just keep a few textbooks on your desk, and every week or so, flip through and publish some fact as "news". Seriously, I learned about this in my medical micro class about fifteen years ago.
 
2012-07-03 01:40:09 PM

Spindle: populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other, allowing gut organisms to regrow without help from the appendix, the researchers said.


Can someone explain to me how this works,

 
2012-07-03 01:41:30 PM

Tax Boy: Spindle: populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other, allowing gut organisms to regrow without help from the appendix, the researchers said.


Can someone explain to me how this works,


Argh. [Kyle Human Cent-iPad gif.]

/Kyle, I bereeve in ryu!
//but not in hotlinking apparently
 
2012-07-03 01:42:05 PM

Tax Boy: Spindle: populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other, allowing gut organisms to regrow without help from the appendix, the researchers said.


Can someone explain to me how this works,


Fecal-oral transmission. And yes, that's exactly what it sounds like.
 
2012-07-03 01:49:40 PM
Hmph. I hadn't heard this, and it explains a lot; my appendix was removed at the same time I had stomach surgery as a child.
 
2012-07-03 01:55:19 PM
I thought the purpose was to help us digest raw leaves and grasses. Not sure where I heard this from, though.
 
2012-07-03 01:59:53 PM
I thought the only function of the appendix was to provide supplemental information.
 
2012-07-03 02:00:42 PM
i thought everyone knew that medical doctors know everything. this is common knowledge. one time i broke a bone and the doctor healed it. just like that. the body's normal repair process didn't have a chance.
 
2012-07-03 02:01:05 PM

Vangor: I thought the purpose was to help us digest raw leaves and grasses. Not sure where I heard this from, though.


That was the purpose of the cecum. The appendix is the vestigial evolutionary remnant of the cecum. Herbivores still have large, active cecums, which do help digesting plant material. We don't need ours any more, and the appendix has taken on this minor, secondary role.
 
2012-07-03 02:01:05 PM

Spindle: Can someone explain to me how this works, because the only mental image I'm getting is something straight out of a japanese fetish video, and it ain't pretty.


Microscopic bits of fecal contamination are everywhere and you ingest vast quantities of it every day. This is perfectly natural and isn't something to worry about. It takes over a certain level before you get problems due to pathogens.

Vangor: I thought the purpose was to help us digest raw leaves and grasses. Not sure where I heard this from, though.


That's the primary ancestral function which has been lost. Which is why it is considered a vestigial organ. Unfortunately people dumbed down vestigial to mean "useless" which isn't true.
 
2012-07-03 02:02:16 PM
Got mine removed at 9 years old
 
2012-07-03 02:04:26 PM
As someone without it, I can definitely say since, the plumbing hasn't worked the same since.

Fun phone conversation that day.
Me: Hey Ang (wife), can you drive me to the hospital when you get home from work? Yeah, um the doc says I have appendicitis and I go in for surgery tonight.
Wife: What? huh? you what? WHAT?!

She was nice enough to surprise me kingdom hearts II which I ended up beating in the week i took off. We had a sofa sleeper and a lazy boy at the time. I spent part of that week in each thanks to to pains from teh holes in the stomach muscles.
 
2012-07-03 02:06:01 PM

sobernutz: Got mine removed at 9 years old


Then you better stay away from amoebic dysentery.
 
2012-07-03 02:08:58 PM

Zap_Rowsdower: Fecal-oral transmission


www.mtv.com

Dude you never go ATM
 
2012-07-03 02:13:30 PM

fawlty: FTFA: But in earlier centuries, when vast tracts of land ...

Here come the Monty Python jokes.


That's Monto Py-thEEN!
 
2012-07-03 02:27:29 PM

Petey4335: As someone without it, I can definitely say since, the plumbing hasn't worked the same since.


Mine was removed, but not until it ruptured. I wouldn't recommend the experience nor the eight days in the hospital it took to recover.

/But the plumbing was fine once the peritonitis was fixed.
 
2012-07-03 02:48:09 PM

basemetal: Now we have Activia!


I grew up around hippies, and people who took Rodale seriously, so I've used this stuff to do the same job for years:

www.organicdirect.com

It works wonders after you've had stomach flu or similar major digestive issues.
 
2012-07-03 02:51:20 PM
FTFA: This function has been made obsolete by modern, industrialised society; populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other


This is why they put remote control units for the TVs in all motels and free samples of food in grocery stores. Didn't you know?

You are welcome.
 
2012-07-03 03:11:25 PM

Zap_Rowsdower: That was the purpose of the cecum. The appendix is the vestigial evolutionary remnant of the cecum. Herbivores still have large, active cecums, which do help digesting plant material. We don't need ours any more, and the appendix has taken on this minor, secondary role.


entropic_existence: That's the primary ancestral function which has been lost. Which is why it is considered a vestigial organ. Unfortunately people dumbed down vestigial to mean "useless" which isn't true.


Thanks for the confirmation and additional explanation. I could have used Google probably, but that is a boring way to search.
 
2012-07-03 03:25:13 PM
Picking up essential bacteria from one another? Sounds unnerving.


/right below the title of the article, there was an ad for Dawnguard (I see one here too). Why must the Internet torture me so?
 
2012-07-03 03:34:43 PM
I thought it was home for the toad or small dwarf that causes tunny aches?
 
2012-07-03 03:45:17 PM
All that talk about gut organisms must've touched a nerve. Anyone have a decent magazine handy? back in a bit.
 
2012-07-03 03:54:50 PM
What kind of backwards ass, barbaric, third world country still exists that makes you pay for health care out of pocket?
 
2012-07-03 04:09:05 PM
FTA: in earlier centuries, when vast tracts of land

Hmm....tell me more about these earlier centuries and their huuuuge "tracts of land"...
 
2012-07-03 04:11:06 PM

Linux_Yes: i thought everyone knew that medical doctors know everything. this is common knowledge. one time i broke a bone and the doctor healed it. just like that. the body's normal repair process didn't have a chance.


Ive fractured my leg bones twice and never got them set. Healed fine in 6 weeks with a lump over the break and then it shaved down over time.

The body does it all by its self sometimes... doctors can watch if it doesnt involve cutting you open.
 
2012-07-03 04:14:27 PM
I read this while shiatting so I'm getting a kick, etc.
 
2012-07-03 04:16:35 PM

Gaseous Anomaly: FTA: "populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other"

/fap


The appendix has been made obsolete by our constant eating of each other's shiat, most likely at McDonalds.
 
2012-07-03 04:22:08 PM

Zap_Rowsdower: Tax Boy: Spindle: populations are now so dense that people pick up essential bacteria from each other, allowing gut organisms to regrow without help from the appendix, the researchers said.


Can someone explain to me how this works,

Fecal-oral transmission. And yes, that's exactly what it sounds like.


So...you're saying that when I crop dust a group of randoms I'm actually helping them out?
 
2012-07-03 04:22:29 PM

Jenniturd: I read this while shiatting so I'm getting a kick, etc.


You're kicking shiat around?

Eeew! So you are the one responsible for making the appendix obsolete! Dang, where will all this outsourcing end?
 
2012-07-03 04:55:32 PM
Lemme guess without RTFA: it acts as a repository for helpful bacteria, serving as a sort of "safe house" to allow them to repopulate the intestines later in the event of a wipeout? That's been known for years.

Oh, that's exactly it.
 
2012-07-03 05:00:12 PM

buckler: Lemme guess without RTFA: it acts as a repository for helpful bacteria, serving as a sort of "safe house" to allow them to repopulate the intestines later in the event of a wipeout? That's been known for years.

Oh, that's exactly it.


Sweet Jesus! You are amazing! Truly a God amongst men.
 
2012-07-03 05:07:00 PM

SultanofSchwing: buckler: Lemme guess without RTFA: it acts as a repository for helpful bacteria, serving as a sort of "safe house" to allow them to repopulate the intestines later in the event of a wipeout? That's been known for years.

Oh, that's exactly it.

Sweet Jesus! You are amazing! Truly a God amongst men.


Nah, but TFA was certainly written by less than one.
 
2012-07-03 05:29:44 PM

Lex A. Preau: Jenniturd: I read this while shiatting so I'm getting a kick, etc.

You're kicking shiat around?

Eeew! So you are the one responsible for making the appendix obsolete! Dang, where will all this outsourcing end?


Yes, it was me! It was all part of my cunning plan to harvest appendixesseses in order to control the world's supply do gut organisms! Muahahahahaa! *thunder bolts and lightening, very very frightening!*

But you had to go and poking around fark and exposed my plan. Now you must die, Mr. Bond.
 
2012-07-03 05:40:26 PM
I am Jack's appendix. I rupture; I kill Jack...
 
2012-07-03 05:59:30 PM
People think their dish washer sterilizes their dishware too.
 
2012-07-03 06:02:46 PM
According to the article, that's still exactly what it's for in modern society.
 
2012-07-03 06:14:38 PM

Tourney3p0: According to the article, that's still exactly what it's for in modern society.


Yeah, it used to have a function. Now it doesn't

Actually I'm glad thats the case. I clicked and read the article afraid that they had found new evidence showing it still helped you out somehow. Mine paid for my doctors vacation 20 years ago so that was gonna be bad news for me.
 
2012-07-03 06:18:24 PM
You're not going to be able to afford a house in the Hamptons by doing appendectomies.

I think a surgeon gets around $600 from most insurance companies for an appendectomy.
 
2012-07-03 07:42:18 PM
Perform analingus. But ONLY for your health.
 
2012-07-03 08:25:32 PM
My appendix was taken out when I was 11 years old. If I get some kind intestinal issue, I just make sure I eat some good quality live culture yogurt. It isn't generally an issue.

On the plus side, I know if I am cut off from society for some odd reason, I wouldn't die of appendicitis... so there's that.
 
2012-07-04 01:50:12 AM
"They eat-a the POO POO!"
/Uganda
 
2012-07-04 05:42:46 AM
Well how does this explain my lactose intolerance that suddenly appeared around 22 years old and that never went away? Is my appendix not working right? Never had any other digestive issues, never done a cleanse. Haven't had gastro in many years though.
 
2012-07-04 03:31:01 PM
Lactose intolerance is genetic. It has nothing whatsoever to do with intestinal bacteria.
 
2012-07-04 08:29:49 PM

Eps05: Well how does this explain my lactose intolerance that suddenly appeared around 22 years old and that never went away? Is my appendix not working right? Never had any other digestive issues, never done a cleanse. Haven't had gastro in many years though.


Lactose intolerance occurs when your body stops making lactase, which is the enzyme responsible for breaking lactose into its component sugars (lactose is composed of one glucose and one galactose bound together). Without lactase, lactose continues into the large bowel undigested where it draws in water by osmotic pressure and gets fermented by gut bacteria, causing bloating, gas, diarrhea, and/or pain.

Everyone is born making lactase, since babies rely on milk for nutrition. Not everyone continues making lactase after infancy and in fact most don't. Lactose intolerance could be considered the norm - the prevailing theory is that lactose tolerance emerged as an evolutionary adaptation among cattle/sheep herders in Europe. Those who had the mutation to keep making lactase after infancy could make use of a Calorie-and-protein-rich food source that those without the mutation could not, conferring an adaptive advantage.

People can develop lactose intolerance at any age. Even people who are lactose "tolerant" their whole lives may find that they tolerate less as they get older. You happened to lose your tolerance at age 22. However, your colon bacterial environment was not involved in this process.

If you want to keep that environment happy, feed it with dietary fiber and send it reinforcements in the form of probiotics like yogurt cultures. You should still be able to tolerate yogurt, as the process of making yogurt involves the conversion of lactose to lactic acid, which should not have the same effect on you (same goes for hard cheeses like cheddar and swiss).
 
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