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(Kotaku)   Watch This Guy Beat All of Diablo III's Toughest Bosses With His Eyes Closed, and remain a virgin the whole time   (kotaku.com) divider line 88
    More: Amusing, eyes closed  
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4462 clicks; posted to Geek » on 02 Jul 2012 at 6:35 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-02 05:16:30 PM
There was nothing amusing about that gibbering retard.
 
2012-07-02 06:24:58 PM
That game is terrible. The loot system is terrible. The auction house is useless. All you do is farm the same quest line a dozen times, so you can buy gear for the next quest line, which you've already played three times.
 
2012-07-02 06:33:44 PM
That's pretty sad. For both him and Blizzard.
 
2012-07-02 06:38:33 PM

foo monkey: That game is terrible. The loot system is terrible. The auction house is useless. All you do is farm the same quest line a dozen times, so you can buy gear for the next quest line, which you've already played three times.


the bosses drop horrible loot - not even worth farming them, and every molten/vampire elite just ruins the game for my monk
 
2012-07-02 06:43:55 PM
Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.
 
2012-07-02 06:49:16 PM
Ooohhh yeyeyeyeye DAHWNNNNDAWHNNNNNdawwhnnnn oh yeh yeh yeh yeh yeh own own own YUH YUH YUH YUH YUH YUH I'YE I'YE I'YE wi'mi'eis clooooosssd.
 
2012-07-02 06:49:44 PM

RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.


Indeed. It's unbelievable what idiots will pay real $$ for. What do you play? 300%+ mf (before nephalim buff) witch doctor with 50k hp and 40k dps here...
 
2012-07-02 06:50:30 PM

RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.


This really isn't a testament to D3; it mostly highlights the absurd stupidity of people. Paying real money for gear in a game is pretty ridiculous in the first place -- paying for gear in a game designed around finding better gear is beyond the pale.
 
2012-07-02 06:51:51 PM

RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.


You've made that much at the RMAH?!

Holy shiat!
 
2012-07-02 06:54:47 PM

Genju: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.

Indeed. It's unbelievable what idiots will pay real $$ for. What do you play? 300%+ mf (before nephalim buff) witch doctor with 50k hp and 40k dps here...


Wow %300 mf? I can only get up to ~%210 MF and I take a huge hit to DPS wearing that gear. Other than that I have 30K dps 30K HP wizard who's...underwhelming at best.
 
2012-07-02 06:54:55 PM

AdamK: the bosses drop horrible loot


This is what bugs the shiat out of me. I understand they want to avoid strict farming, but beating a main Act boss on Hell and getting two blue drops farking sucks cock.

foo monkey: All you do is farm the same quest line a dozen times, so you can buy gear for the next quest line, which you've already played three times.


To be honest though, you just basically described every MMO end-game out there as well. Raid after same raid over and over again to upgrade your gear....so you can do more raids over and over again to upgrade your gear.

I'm not saying popularity at all equals quality...but there's a reason D3 has sold a brazillion copies despite the fact it's PC-only and had a shiat ton of issues at launch along with the odious 'online single player' shiat. That type of repetitive gameplay is farking addicting as hell.
 
2012-07-02 06:57:17 PM
 
2012-07-02 06:59:43 PM
D3 bosses are a joke. And so is the game.
 
2012-07-02 07:00:06 PM

Shrugging Atlas: This is what bugs the shiat out of me. I understand they want to avoid strict farming, but beating a main Act boss on Hell and getting two blue drops farking sucks cock.


They need to address this, but I'm not sure what they should do. The game's structure makes a lot of sense when you hit 60 and can start stacking neph valor, but it seems weird before that.
 
2012-07-02 07:00:52 PM
Athene has made a name for himself being such a cocky guy, as well as for crowdsourcing loot aquisition to get superpowered characters

So a guy with uber-twinked out toons thinks the game is too easy?

Shocking.
 
2012-07-02 07:06:20 PM

fusillade762: Athene has made a name for himself being such a cocky guy, as well as for crowdsourcing loot aquisition to get superpowered characters

So a guy with uber-twinked out toons thinks the game is too easy?

Shocking.


Yeah, my thoughts exactly. For the vast majority of us, the game is plenty hard enough.

/stupid hunter can't go 30 feet into inferno act 2...
 
2012-07-02 07:08:35 PM

Dinki: fusillade762: Athene has made a name for himself being such a cocky guy, as well as for crowdsourcing loot aquisition to get superpowered characters

So a guy with uber-twinked out toons thinks the game is too easy?

Shocking.

Yeah, my thoughts exactly. For the vast majority of us, the game is plenty hard enough.

/stupid hunter can't go 30 feet into inferno act 2...


My Hunter can't get past one of the teleporting bosses in Act 4 Nightmare. I barely have enough hit points to take one of teleporting hits and then the game kept lagging last night when I was trying a different strategy.

However, I'd say as a pretty casual gamer, it's been relatively easy so far.
 
2012-07-02 07:15:37 PM

Genju: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.

Indeed. It's unbelievable what idiots will pay real $$ for. What do you play? 300%+ mf (before nephalim buff) witch doctor with 50k hp and 40k dps here...


I have a monk. Killed Inferno diablo back in late May. 40k dps, 13k armor and 700 RA. The game is awful and I'd be bored out of my mind, but I'm tanky enough that I can roll through Act3 without paying very much attention, so much so that I can watch TV at the same time. Working on season 3 of The Shield atm.
 
2012-07-02 07:22:14 PM

MooseMuffin: They need to address this, but I'm not sure what they should do.


Same. If you give the bosses reliable, good drops then watch as everyone just fights them over and over again...particularly since none of them are terribly difficult to beat. But Jesus does the above scenario above suck. I had that happen a few hours ago.
 
2012-07-02 07:22:51 PM

Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.


Call me when he can beat Ghosts & Goblins.
 
2012-07-02 07:28:42 PM

RivenSilver: Genju: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.

Indeed. It's unbelievable what idiots will pay real $$ for. What do you play? 300%+ mf (before nephalim buff) witch doctor with 50k hp and 40k dps here...

I have a monk. Killed Inferno diablo back in late May. 40k dps, 13k armor and 700 RA. The game is awful and I'd be bored out of my mind, but I'm tanky enough that I can roll through Act3 without paying very much attention, so much so that I can watch TV at the same time. Working on season 3 of The Shield atm.


A friend had a tanky monk and the attack speed nerf destroyed him. I have a full set of crit and hammer throw cost reduction gear to make a throwing barb but no motivation to level it. Why bother when my witch doctor can survive almost anything. The only thing that messes witch doctor up badly is invulnerable minions. Usually those end up being a death match where I have to spirit walk into the yellow and just pop everything I have.

Skills:

Posion Dart (splinters)
Acid Cloud (zombie bomb whatever its called the final rune)
Spirit Walk (jaunt)
Fetish totem (the health regen one. lets me deathmatch groups)
Fetish Army (the final rune with extra dart ones. lets them distract champions while I deathmatch them)
Grasp of the Dead (the 80% slow one)

Passives:
Spirit Vessel (also used in deathmatches, runaway, etc.)
The 20% damage one
I switch around my third. Mana regen, the poison damage reducing enemy damage by 20%, the health regen one.

It's fun because sometimes I team with another high mf witch doctor that uses stuff like hex and the mana regen fetish totem and stuff so we really synergize well together.
 
2012-07-02 07:32:34 PM

Shrugging Atlas: MooseMuffin: They need to address this, but I'm not sure what they should do.

Same. If you give the bosses reliable, good drops then watch as everyone just fights them over and over again...particularly since none of them are terribly difficult to beat. But Jesus does the above scenario above suck. I had that happen a few hours ago.


It happens anyway. If you are an Act I farmer, your rotation is probably something like this:

Pick cursed hold quest
Cemetery waypoint, do 3 defiled crypts
Festering woods waypoint. Do the 2 caves there, search around outside for extra champions and treasure goblins.
Norther Highlands waypoint, look for watch tower, head to Leoric's Manor
Halls waypoint, head to Butcher (killing Warden on the way).
Repeat. possibly skip last step if you don't want to bother.

Now why do that? because you are guaranteed champions at many of those places.
 
2012-07-02 07:33:51 PM

Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.


That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.
 
2012-07-02 07:34:59 PM
D3 was such a disappointment.
 
2012-07-02 07:40:42 PM

ProfessorOhki: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.


Yeah, all the bosses are like that. And I do believe the video depicted medium difficulty.
 
2012-07-02 07:41:00 PM
D3 is boring and uncreative. I have given up on it. Been playing Vindictus for my ARPG fix while waiting for GW2. (It's F2P on Steam)
 
2012-07-02 07:42:03 PM

RivenSilver: Genju: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

I have a monk. Killed Inferno diablo back in late May. 40k dps, 13k armor and 700 RA. The game is awful and I'd be bored out of my mind, but I'm tanky enough that I can roll through Act3 without paying very much attention, so much so that I can watch TV at the same time. Working on season 3 of The Shield atm.


You watch TV at the same time you are playing this game?

It looks really boring judging from the gameplay videos, but I had no idea it was this bad. Glad I didn't buy it.
 
2012-07-02 07:49:48 PM

moviemarketing: RivenSilver: Genju: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

I have a monk. Killed Inferno diablo back in late May. 40k dps, 13k armor and 700 RA. The game is awful and I'd be bored out of my mind, but I'm tanky enough that I can roll through Act3 without paying very much attention, so much so that I can watch TV at the same time. Working on season 3 of The Shield atm.

You watch TV at the same time you are playing this game?

It looks really boring judging from the gameplay videos, but I had no idea it was this bad. Glad I didn't buy it.


I've actually nodded off on a couple occasions...stayed up a little late, then you wan to get to a checkpoint so you're fighting through it. But you get into such a mode of point *click**click**click**click**click**click**click**click**click**click* point *click**click**click**click**click* that after a while you lose the ability to think.

I really have nothing to compare it to....Starcraft 1 is the only other Blizzard game I've played. I bought D3 for the hell (no pun intended) of it. It's certainly a...different...game for me anyway. I can see how some people would just get addicted as hell to it but on the other hand I can see how some people would play it for a single night and say 'fark this.' But that probably applies almost every video game ever created.
 
2012-07-02 07:56:35 PM
I love hearing about people who run laps through inferno but then state the game stinks. Obviously something about it has held your attention for hundreds of hours. Its been out for 6 work weeks which would be 40 x 6 = 240 hours of full time work. It probably takes at least half that or more to move past inferno act 1. I've heard of people putting in 3 or 4 hundred plus hours. In 6 weeks?! Results will vary with skill, luck, help from friends, use of RMAH, bots, or gold dupes.

It's a fun game. If you get bored, quit. 60 bucks for hundreds of hours of entertainment is amazing.

/having fun with the game
//working 70 hours this week so my wiz and barb will have to relax for the time being
 
2012-07-02 08:00:31 PM

hawcian: RivenSilver: Your monk sucks then.

D3 is at once a terrible game and the best game of all time. $1100 so far, without selling off any of my characters' gear.

This really isn't a testament to D3; it mostly highlights the absurd stupidity of people. Paying real money for gear in a game is pretty ridiculous in the first place -- paying for gear in a game designed around finding better gear is beyond the pale.


How is this any different than people spending absurd hours playing a game?
 
2012-07-02 08:01:57 PM
Game is truly a huge let down. I think corporate douche-baggery is to blame mostly.
 
2012-07-02 08:02:19 PM

Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.


Sweet. Did the people behind Recettar (or however that's spelled) make that one?
They do good work. I hope it's being translated.
 
2012-07-02 08:02:55 PM

Counter_Intelligent: ProfessorOhki: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.

Yeah, all the bosses are like that. And I do believe the video depicted medium difficulty.


Video makes it look easy. I picked Y's up the other day and ended up deleting it because the difficulty was too crushing and it was only on medium. I may go back to it again but its kinda shallow outside of actual combat and I wasn't having much fun.
 
2012-07-02 08:03:24 PM

Genju: Shrugging Atlas: MooseMuffin: They need to address this, but I'm not sure what they should do.

Same. If you give the bosses reliable, good drops then watch as everyone just fights them over and over again...particularly since none of them are terribly difficult to beat. But Jesus does the above scenario above suck. I had that happen a few hours ago.

It happens anyway. If you are an Act I farmer, your rotation is probably something like this:

Pick cursed hold quest
Cemetery waypoint, do 3 defiled crypts
Festering woods waypoint. Do the 2 caves there, search around outside for extra champions and treasure goblins.
Norther Highlands waypoint, look for watch tower, head to Leoric's Manor
Halls waypoint, head to Butcher (killing Warden on the way).
Repeat. possibly skip last step if you don't want to bother.

Now why do that? because you are guaranteed champions at many of those places.


Right, but "run around the world and fight the randomly generated champion monster packs" is pretty much what Blizzard was going for. I think that's a lot better than just "Halls 3 waypoint, Kill Butcher" forever.
 
2012-07-02 08:04:54 PM

God-is-a-Taco: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

Sweet. Did the people behind Recettar (or however that's spelled) make that one?
They do good work. I hope it's being translated.


It's on Steam right now for $15. It's Ys: Oath in Felghana.
 
2012-07-02 08:06:44 PM

Shakes999: Counter_Intelligent: ProfessorOhki: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.

Yeah, all the bosses are like that. And I do believe the video depicted medium difficulty.

Video makes it look easy. I picked Y's up the other day and ended up deleting it because the difficulty was too crushing and it was only on medium. I may go back to it again but its kinda shallow outside of actual combat and I wasn't having much fun.


I first played it in Japanese, so I was able to ignore anything outside of combat. Which is why I thoroughly enjoyed it.
 
2012-07-02 08:11:21 PM
JonDAAAARRRRRR!
 
2012-07-02 08:18:26 PM
Bought D3. Played about 12 hours over a weekend. Got bored in act 3 normal when the ONLY thing to do is 'pick up blues, sell for gold, go to AH'. Never found a single upgrade. The novelty quickly wore off, and I didn't enjoy the piss poor MMO style mechanics.

Got it refunded. Bliz was super speedy on the refund so awesome on them (like 4-6 hours).

Anyone have a rpg or ARPG released in the last few months that is awesome? Feels like there's been nothing. Any console or pc.
 
2012-07-02 08:22:23 PM

Counter_Intelligent: ProfessorOhki: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.

Yeah, all the bosses are like that. And I do believe the video depicted medium difficulty.


Inferno is the hardest difficulty.
 
2012-07-02 08:30:33 PM

Kuroshin: Counter_Intelligent: ProfessorOhki: Counter_Intelligent: Diablo bosses are chumps. Call me when he can beat this without getting hurt.

That video is sort of like watching someone play a vertical-scrolling shooter on medium difficulty.

Yeah, all the bosses are like that. And I do believe the video depicted medium difficulty.

Inferno is the hardest difficulty.


I think he meant Y's
 
2012-07-02 08:33:25 PM

Kuroshin: Inferno is the hardest difficulty.


That is not Inferno difficulty.
 
2012-07-02 08:36:05 PM
Which is confusing because both games have Nightmare and Inferno as difficulty levels.

Shakes999: I think he meant Y's


This is what I meant.
 
2012-07-02 08:38:31 PM

croesius: JonDAAAARRRRRR!


lol

Maybe I'm just getting older, but Diablo 3 failed to hold my interest. Drop rates seem to be so low that it frustrates you into using the AH. There's no lower level set items that were fun to collect in D2. No runes, no charms, less gem types, legendaries are extremely underwhelming and have random stats which are almost always crap.

I also don't like the skill system. I don't know who at Blizzard is so enamored with giving players so much "choice". In the end the player picks a build which is effective, and all the runes and spells to choose from are just going to end up a big balancing nightmare for Blizzard - especially when this PVP stuff comes in.

Besides, the whole Nephalem Valor buff seems to entirely contradict the idea of switching your build. And whose idea was it to have a delay after switching your abilities, before you can use them?

Another biatch: Too much goddamned dialogue! I don't want to have to listen to farking Leah's wide-eyed enthusiasm for 2/3rds of the game. Just shut the fark up biatch! Did I mention she's an awful character? The whole plot was shiat, too. And the ending was absolute garbage too. "And everyone lived happily ever after". Really? fark that.
 
2012-07-02 08:51:49 PM

kroonermanblack: Bought D3. Played about 12 hours over a weekend. Got bored in act 3 normal when the ONLY thing to do is 'pick up blues, sell for gold, go to AH'. Never found a single upgrade. The novelty quickly wore off, and I didn't enjoy the piss poor MMO style mechanics.

Got it refunded. Bliz was super speedy on the refund so awesome on them (like 4-6 hours).

Anyone have a rpg or ARPG released in the last few months that is awesome? Feels like there's been nothing. Any console or pc.


I'm going to second this question, though I think at this point I'm stuck waiting for Borderlands 2. I play console (I know, I know, bring on the hate) and my day-to-day laptop can't run much.
 
2012-07-02 08:57:49 PM

INeedAName: my day-to-day laptop can't run much


Have you tried gog.com? They're all old games, to be sure, but maybe there are some you haven't played?
 
2012-07-02 08:58:31 PM

Shrugging Atlas: AdamK: the bosses drop horrible loot

This is what bugs the shiat out of me. I understand they want to avoid strict farming, but beating a main Act boss on Hell and getting two blue drops farking sucks cock.


The bosses don't have immunities or special qualities, so it makes a lot of sense that the special packs in Inferno difficulty drop the best loot... they're generally harder than the bosses.

My main problem is that hard mode isn't really much fun. Repair costs are high enough that you can actually run out of gold (not really an issue with D2) so the high difficulties where you die all the time aren't anywhere near as much fun. Plus, it's literally D2 with some new levels, and I've played all that already.

Basically, all it's got going for it is that it's mindless action fun, and the gear system deprives you of even that. Having to go back a difficulty setting to farm gold so you can repair your current gear = not fun. Having to farm the same content for 10-20 hours minimum before you can advance one act = not fun.

If they'd simply had Inferno drop no gold whatsoever (only loot) and do no item damage, and made the whole thing the same difficulty in mechanical terms so that you could grab some friends and jump into a legitimately hard version of whatever level you thought would be fun rather than your character being valid for exactly one level and too powerful for anything lower... I might still be playing.

In summary: Are gauntlet Legends games still being made? They're like D3 but good, kinda wanna play some now.
 
2012-07-02 09:13:03 PM
Played closed beta.
Got bored of it before open Beta and recognized some warning signs before release with the AH system.
so skipped it.....
Bullet Dodged.

Now I listen quietly to all my friends complain about how they hate farming in the game and how repetitious it is, and they keep playing, and paying. I just shrug and nod. You people just like being miserable it seems.
 
2012-07-02 09:13:28 PM
Not cool story bro. Actually this barely qualifies as inane.

Never been a huge Diablo fan but ive had fun with the first 2 throughout the years. My best friend and I were looking forward to playing it when it came out and doing some co-op. Hes always been the Diablo obsessive. Anyways, Joystiq ran a article the day it came out saying that 4 koreans had powered through it in 7 hours. I sent my friend the link and he proceeded to rip me up one side and down the other screaming about how I just ruined the game for him after a 12 year wait and refuses to talk to me still 6 weeks later. Yes diablo 3 ruined my relationship with my best friend of 15 years . Apparently I forgot this game is a god damn cult to some people.

After that, I added blizzard to my never-give-money list right next to EA. Still glad I saved the cash on it.
 
2012-07-02 10:21:50 PM

Counter_Intelligent: Kuroshin: Inferno is the hardest difficulty.

That is not Inferno difficulty.


It is, actually. Every 'difficulty' level is really just a gear check, and that guy is loaded with insane DPS gear.

I enjoyed the first playthrough, and found the second mildly interesting. Everything after that is just extremely tedious. As the popularity of WoW shows, lots of people don't mind doing the same content over and over hoping for slightly improved clothing, in order to do more content over and over in the hope of slightly better clothing, but i'm not one of them.
 
2012-07-02 10:43:47 PM

J. Frank Parnell: Counter_Intelligent: Kuroshin: Inferno is the hardest difficulty.

That is not Inferno difficulty.

It is, actually. Every 'difficulty' level is really just a gear check, and that guy is loaded with insane DPS gear.

I enjoyed the first playthrough, and found the second mildly interesting. Everything after that is just extremely tedious. As the popularity of WoW shows, lots of people don't mind doing the same content over and over hoping for slightly improved clothing, in order to do more content over and over in the hope of slightly better clothing, but i'm not one of them.


I was talking about the video I posted.
 
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