Let me get this straight, one minute he's divorced, the next he's happily married, and finally divorced again. I'm guessing he's done been married twelve times since the start of this whole thing.

*sniff* *sniff*

So brave.. so patriotic.


Jesus farking christ. Whats wrong with all of you. Myself included. This world is farked.

I still don't understand why this idiot woman that won the things didn't cancel whatever payment she sent.

I think it is strange that she is keeping the 5 that are marked with a big black permanent marker "F" on their butts. Who is to know if she truly got them authenticated and permanent marker is really easy to wash off anyway. I saw no picture of big black "F"'s on any beanie butts. I say the old hag is scamming! She is selling back the ones she already had in her 1500+ collection and keeping the Royal Blue Peanut for herself.

Guess her kids finially told her that it's time for Grandma to go into a home and she has to pay or it.

Forget driving, old people shouldn't be allowed on the internet. I spent the better part of an afternoon once deleting viruses and spyware off of my grandmother's fancy-ass computer that my uncle somehow talked her into buying.

This bright woman has apparently not even left negative feedback?!?!

Caveat Emptor, grandmah. The guy said on his auction that he (supposedly) didn't know jack about them. Whether he lied or not, tough. You decided to buy them, even though he ripped you a new one a bunch of times via e-mail, and you weren't sure that the stupid little beanies were real or fakes. You knew the rules, you tried to get answers, and even when you got none, you were stupid enough to buy them.

For all the crap you put that jackass through, granny, he deserves to keep your money. Heck, what were you going to spend it on anyway? Diapers? Yarn to knit blankets?

On the other hand, it's funny, her e-mail address is right there, posted on a bunch of sites, out in the open. She must be getting 500 of those "Not Viagra, but better!" e-mails everyday... hehehehe... she deserves it.

It looks like the she-hag that's complaining is the one that's committing fraud. First she adamantly states she believes they are fake, seller posts her email and states he's blocked her account from bidding. Then, she uses another account to buy the items she thinks are fakes. Then, she raises a stink and raises all kinds of holy hell.

And . . . Lastly, she SELLS most of the product and defaces the rest (putting a big black F on them). This is why I don't weep for Grandpa Simpson being shipped to the old folks home.

When law enforcement comes a knocking, and she's only got stuffed animals with markings all over them, and they ask about the rest and she says, "I sold them for $200 - Oops, I crapped my pants." I doubt they'll look kindly upon her allegations.

Some might even say SHE'S lying about the whole thing and bought those fakes herself.

In fact, I think Sailor has a case against her for harrassment.

Caveat Emptor, grandmah. The guy said on his auction that he (supposedly) didn't know jack about them. Whether he lied or not, tough. You decided to buy them, even though he ripped you a new one a bunch of times via e-mail, and you weren't sure that the stupid little beanies were real or fakes. You knew the rules, you tried to get answers, and even when you got none, you were stupid enough to buy them.

For all the crap you put that jackass through, granny, he deserves to keep your money. Heck, what were you going to spend it on anyway? Diapers? Yarn to knit blankets?

On the other hand, it's funny, her e-mail address is right there, posted on a bunch of sites, out in the open. She must be getting 500 of those "Not Viagra, but better!" e-mails everyday... hehehehe... she deserves it.

PopDog2

Damnit! You had to throw the oops I crapped my pants in there, didn't you!?!? Now everyone in the office is wondering why i'm laughing hysterically

It looks like the she-hag that's complaining is the one that's committing fraud. First she adamantly states she believes they are fake, seller posts her email and states he's blocked her account from bidding. Then, she uses another account to buy the items she thinks are fakes. Then, she raises a stink and raises all kinds of holy hell.

And . . . Lastly, she SELLS most of the product and defaces the rest (putting a big black F on them). This is why I don't weep for Grandpa Simpson being shipped to the old folks home.

When law enforcement comes a knocking, and she's only got stuffed animals with markings all over them, and they ask about the rest and she says, "I sold them for $200 - Oops, I crapped my pants." I doubt they'll look kindly upon her allegations.

Some might even say SHE'S lying about the whole thing and bought those fakes herself.

In fact, I think Sailor has a case against her for harrassment.

Oops, mods please remove duplicate. :-)

Glad you liked it, Kyng Nothing :)

I find it funny the guy doesn't have any negitve feedback. Seems like granny would've done that, because that's a proverbial STD on eBay, right?

Beanie baby story from a while back(Second time around):

I was getting a bit hungry, so since I had to drop off some videos at the local Blockbuster ("Starship Troopers" and "Boogie Nights," if you must know), I'd go and get some lunch at McDonald's. It somewhat qualifies as a "food", at least until you get to dinner when you can make up for it with some real nutrients.

As I approached, it seemed odd that there was more than the usual number of morons going in there as well, along with a LOT of discarded Happy Meal containers in the parking lot. I worried that it may be "brat night", but noticed that the telltale sign of sprogs working up a good lawsuit were absent from the playground out front, so I pressed on.

Anyways, as I was placing my order, this sweaty, fatassed she-freak tries to shove herself in front of me, screaming at the top of her lungs if they still had any of those pelican "Teeny Beany Babies" they were plopping into Happy Meals. It was bad enough that the line was extra long and extra slow because the McBots in the burger mines were working franticly to fill all those HM orders for the rest of the Beany-crazed herd.

I came close to wanting to grab this hippo and scream "GET OUT OF MY FACE, YOU BEANY-BRAINED MORON!! *I* *AM* *HUNGRYYYYYY*!!!!" at the top of my lungs, but Satan gave me a BETTER idea. Something with even MORE devastating potential.

I looked towards the harried, humanoid shaped pimple-farm behind the counter and asked how many of these Bobdammed pelicans they had left.

"Uh, about three," he said.

"Okay, I'd like to add THREE Happy Meals to my order, and make sure they have those pelicans in there, OK?"

"Uh, Okay.......sure" he replied, catching onto why I would order that many. It seemed to make him feel like he'd bring them to me on a McSilver tray if they had one.

I gave Mrs. Jabba a big-assed smirk (ever see that part where the Grinch grins from ear to ear?). She seemed so agast at the horror of her NOT getting her precious farking Teeny Beanies that I actually had to make sure that when my order came up, she didn't try to make a grab for one of the Happy Meals and run for the door (I'm sure she wouldn't move very fast, but trying to stop THAT much mass might prove hazardous).

Instead, she screamed a big shiatfit, demanded to speak with the manager to make me GIVE HER those pelican Beanies (the head McManager just simply told her that it was "first come, first serve", and it was corporate policy). Realizing that she was as much of a loser as she was fat, she claimed that McDonald's and I were in on a conspiracy and swore that she was going to sue me and the McDonald's Corporation for every thin dime we both have and that we were NOT going to get away with this, yatta-yatta-yatta, oink oink oink, moooooooo... Yeah, right.

So there I sat, munching away on my McFood (there was enough on the tray to make even that cow woman explode), with my little droopy-ass pelican toys sitting in full view so that as the Beany-morons left empty-handed, they'd see my treasure before them and they would know despair ("IIIIIIIIIIII got your-Beeeeeeeeee-nies! You-can-not, haaaaave-none! You-are-all-reeeeee-tards!"). A few of them actually came up to my table as I was eating and offered real money for them, but my evil was in full bloom that hour, and I had other plans for these little effigies of media-hype and human stupidity.

Before I departed (I was getting so full that I just ate the "meat" patty in each HM and left the buns and fries untouched), I sliced off the pelican heads and left each one perched on top of the straws of the undrunk small drinks as a warning to those who try to fark around with MY personal space ever again (and used the ketchup packets to have simulated congealed blood running down the straws and neck stumps of the bodies, which I had placed in the uneaten buns). And to finish this masterpiece, I took out a marker to make a little billboard out of one of the HM boxes turned inside-out to write "BEANIES SUCK!!" It looked like a diorama of Vlad Teppes' visit to McDonaldLand.

I wish I had a camera to photograph the table before I left, but I get the feeling some of the workers may have done so before they cleared it off. I'm sure it made their day after their harrowing shift in Beanybrain Hell. I've got to ask them if they can make me print when I go back there some day.

Sure, I may have wasted a lot of good food and passed up the chance to make some moron money, but the chance to commit evil like this has NO price tag.

Beanie babies and the morons that collect them suck :)

I thought he clearly stated he didn't know a damn thing about beanies and made no promises?

sounds like buyer beware to me.
the old bag is just releasing she's an idiot for taking an $800 chance.

of course i never understood collectibles...
worthless shiat i gotta carry around that has no useful function. yeah... lemme spend my time and energy on that instead of strippers and video games... asshats.

Bullshiatter
My WFU worked at a store as well during that time. Somewhere in richy-poo San Marino area. They almost had to call the police a couple of times because the rich, old wimmen would raid the beanie babies and knock kids around and rip beanies out of their hands.

This wasn't double wide trash, these are people living in million dollar homes that you see on TV each and every day!

This guy is an eBay Hero!

I'm not sure what an Internet Fraud Mediator is, but as a professional Mediator myself, I am apalled at their methodologies. The IFM may be an intermediary but has none of the characteristics of a neutral mediator.

If you would like an impartial mediator for resolution of eBay claims, I would recommend SquareTrade ()--It's also one of the ways to get negative feedback removed.

Does Ebay block direct links now? I can't tell you how many links I've clicked on recently only to find myself at the main page. Actually, I could tell you but I'm lazy and you couldn't care less. In all likelihood you've stopped reading already becauxe its become overwhelmingly apparent that I have nothing productive to say but merely am rattling on because I have nothing better to do and get a certain sexual arousal at seeing my own words in print.

StephenFalken

Not alot of people like squaretrade. It's like give them $20 and then smack yourself for losing another $20 on a bum deal.

Someone may have pointed this out, but

She scammed the guy. She swapped conterfeit beanies for the real McCoys and sent them back to the guy. Psyche!!

My senior year of high school I worked at the local country-western McDonald's (yeah, you read that correctly). My very first day of work was the first day of the beanie baby craze. One fat, greasy woman threatened my life when I told her we were out of a certain beanie (a turtle maybe?). Since employees had to make the Happy Meals, I knew of a few who snagged some of their favorite beanies ahead of time...I didn't do it because I had to walk home after my shift was done and I swear to God that one time I had some psycho beanie baby person follow me. (They would travel in packs to McD's statewide when they heard they were getting certain shipments of beanies.) No use getting jumped over a stuffed animal.

I stayed at that job for 3 months before I finally snapped. Now I can't even eat there.

Props to b0bb0; I would've loved to have seen that

B0bb0, are you claiming that's your story or just cut/pasting?
http://www.ijmc.com/archives/1998/September/01September1998.html

In any case it's awesome.

Anyone have the original auction saved or in cache or something?

Authorship or not, thanks to B0bb0 for posting that bit...took me 20 minutes to read it because I couldn't get through a sentence without laughing so hard I was crying and couldn't breathe. Once I finally calmed down enough to figure out where i'd left off in the story, the next sentence would dissolve me back into hysterical laughter again.

Haven't laughed this hard or this much since the first time I saw Snatch. Took me four hours to get through it because I had to keep pausing the DVD to catch my breath.

Wasn't stoned, if you were wondering...just damn funny stuff.

Thanks for making my day!

The woman who bought these things is an idiot.

She has no case for fraud at all because her case consists of only her word against his, and that is just not going to cut it.

She has no way to prove that the beanies she has marked with an F were the ones sent by the Drunken Sailor. There are no distinguishing marks visible in the pictures on the auction so how can she prove it? She admits to having tons of beanie babies so for all we, and the courts, know she previously bought fakes and then when she got these they were the real deal so she sent her "fakes" to be authenticated in the hopes of getting her money back, thus getting the real ones for free.

Since she can't prove that they are the ones she got in the auction she has no chance in a court of law, or even in the court of public opinion.

...the Freaking Wildlife Organization that governs Blue Stuffed Elephants.

Made me laugh.

I corresponded with Pat, the "Internet Fraud Mediator." They could have a case, under a couple of different legal theories:

1. Implied warranty. Pat alleges that thedrunkensailor (tds) sold beanie babies before. This could qualify him as a merchant, and could create an implied warranty for the products he sells. Of course, the old lady would only get back what she paid, minus what she made by selling the non-fakes.

2. Fraud/Counterfeit. If we believe tds, he never intimated that the toys were real, but Pat alleges that he sent emails to the old lady claiming that he had been in the store when his wife bought the toys, and that she bought them from a reputable dealer. This could be enough to defeat the disclaimer on his auction.

Of course, I'm not a lawyer, and I don't play one on TV. None of the above comments are meant to be legal advice, and you're a moron if you use them as such.

And he could have a case for harrassment. After all, she just got rid of ALL the evidence.