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(Starpulse)   Kristen Stewart says she's "going to look like a porn star" in her next role; probably not act as good as one though   (starpulse.com) divider line 68
    More: Unlikely, Kristen Stewart, Nick Cassavetes, WWD, snuff films, action movies, porn stars  
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5665 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 29 Jun 2012 at 6:23 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-29 03:01:29 PM
Quote from TFA: "...then you're just playing a caricature of a girl."

At least she already has experience in that.
 
2012-06-29 03:05:49 PM
She's not bad with the right cast around her. Adventureland proved that much. I'll be surprised if she has what it takes to be the lead.

Sorry Kristen, but you just don't have that Ellen Page-ness about you.

Slives: Quote from TFA: "...then you're just playing a caricature of a girl."

At least she already has experience in that.


That burn was so harsh, I think it killed Edward.
 
2012-06-29 03:12:32 PM
I admit I have a bit of a fetish for girls who just lay there and look bored while having sex.
 
2012-06-29 03:16:05 PM
As long as the role involves a lot of blinking and moping, she's all set.
 
2012-06-29 03:18:24 PM
I thought the hot new story was about the porn chick who farts for a living, not the one who looks like she's eternally smelling a fart for a living.
 
2012-06-29 03:59:01 PM
Wait . . . so how many cup sizes is she increasing?
 
2012-06-29 04:05:54 PM

bdub77: I admit I have a bit of a fetish for girls who just lay there and look bored while having sex.


Man, then you would love every girl I've ever been with!
 
2012-06-29 05:09:55 PM
Man, she looks way different than when she was on that Third Rock from the Sun show...
 
2012-06-29 05:12:08 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I thought the hot new story was about the porn chick who farts for a living, not the one who looks like she's eternally smelling a fart for a living.


Wat? I just...

Ewww.
 
2012-06-29 05:14:25 PM
Which porn star exactly?
 
2012-06-29 05:20:22 PM
Did you mean to say "act as well as one", subby? Because I wouldn't usually characterize a porn star's character's demeanor as "good" so much as "naughty", which is commonly considered a subset of "bad", but "bad" in the good way, if you know what I mean.
 
2012-06-29 05:22:36 PM

obeymatt: Which porn star exactly?


www.textually.org
 
2012-06-29 05:26:19 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I thought the hot new story was about the porn chick who farts for a living, not the one who looks like she's eternally smelling a fart for a living.


Don't those two really come as a matching set though? It's the new parable for our generation:
If a crackwhore farts in brazil, but there's nobody around to smell it, does it make a smell at all?
 
2012-06-29 05:27:07 PM
"Everyone says I'm boring so I'm trying too hard"....the movie.
 
2012-06-29 06:02:11 PM
Who?
 
2012-06-29 06:28:06 PM

Relatively Obscure: bdub77: I admit I have a bit of a fetish for girls who just lay there and look bored while having sex.

Man, then you would love every girl I've ever been with!


The first 2 girls I was with were like that. I was really sad I thought porn had let me down then I had a 1 day stand with this girl and my pelvis hurt for 2 days afterwards
 
2012-06-29 06:30:05 PM

Relatively Obscure: bdub77: I admit I have a bit of a fetish for girls who just lay there and look bored while having sex.

Man, then you would love every girl I've ever been with!


perhaps you fellows should master the Philadelphia Deep Dish Finger Pie. they'll be buying you smokes and making you dinner for weeks to come.
 
2012-06-29 06:34:25 PM
FTFA:"I'm going to get into the best shape of my life. I'm going to look like a stripper. I'm going to look like a porn star."

Since when has "looking good" = "looking like a stripper/porn star"? This girl wa-a-ay watches too much TV or she knows nothing about meth.

Kinda reminds me of this.

Heh.
 
2012-06-29 06:37:14 PM
This girl watches wa-a-ay too much TV.

Damnit.
 
2012-06-29 06:45:19 PM

obeymatt: Which porn star exactly?


An extremely bored one with vacant far away eyes. Kinda like porn for bowlers.
 
mhd
2012-06-29 06:53:38 PM

ununcle: An extremely bored one with vacant far away eyes.


Ah, Czech porn.
 
2012-06-29 07:00:04 PM
So she's basically starring in a reboot of 8mm meets Taken?
 
2012-06-29 07:06:07 PM
She already has the dead eyes that most porn stars have, so she's got that going for her.
 
2012-06-29 07:07:07 PM

FishyFred: She's not bad with the right cast around her to carry her through a movie.

 
2012-06-29 07:08:45 PM
As a stripper pole,she'd be perfect.....
 
2012-06-29 07:09:08 PM
You guys are nuts and are very picky. So she can't act but she looks good so the sex can't be all that bad (hopefully). If you want to fark a talented actor then you'd all be having sex with Kenneth Branagh.
 
2012-06-29 07:28:51 PM
Her british accent and deadpan persona seemed more genuine in Huntsman than did the performance of Charlize Theron.
 
2012-06-29 07:32:51 PM

s2s2s2: Her british accent and deadpan persona seemed more genuine in Huntsman than did the performance of Charlize Theron.


If by "more genuine" you mean "appallingly bland",then we're in agreement.
 
2012-06-29 07:49:59 PM
www.freeloader.co.uk

"Dull surprise..."

/not obscure
 
2012-06-29 07:50:13 PM
That's who Ms. Stewart reminds me of: Sacha Grey!

They both have the same, dead-behind-the-eyes, look about them.

Just as I prefer my women.
 
2012-06-29 08:01:01 PM

guitarnoir: That's who Ms. Stewart reminds me of: Sacha Grey!

They both have the same, dead-behind-the-eyes, look about them.

Just as I prefer my women.


Was actually thinking the same thing... though, I think Grey has more life to her than Stewart.
 
2012-06-29 08:04:09 PM

Cinaed: guitarnoir: That's who Ms. Stewart reminds me of: Sacha Grey!

They both have the same, dead-behind-the-eyes, look about them.

Just as I prefer my women.

Was actually thinking the same thing... though, I think Grey has more life to her than Stewart.


Stick it in her pooper, and then make the comparison.
 
2012-06-29 08:06:26 PM
panic room

*credits*

WHAT
 
2012-06-29 08:20:14 PM

vygramul: Cinaed: guitarnoir: That's who Ms. Stewart reminds me of: Sacha Grey!

They both have the same, dead-behind-the-eyes, look about them.

Just as I prefer my women.

Was actually thinking the same thing... though, I think Grey has more life to her than Stewart.

Stick it in her pooper, and then make the comparison.


I'll have to A/B that several times--with a, "Real Doll", as a control, to give you a scientifically vaid answer.

The things I do for science.
 
2012-06-29 08:26:00 PM
She goes topless in On the Road.

No, it's not CGI or a body double.
 
2012-06-29 08:30:33 PM
I had an ex that looked a bit like her, but could display emotions. Also was an absolute freak in the sack, and as I came to find out, the grand-daughter of the base commander at the time. Ah yes.... and a gamer.

/she was, of course.... a bit insane.
//she would get jealous even if there was another girl in the gaming party
///sex was awesome, though.
 
2012-06-29 08:30:49 PM
29.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-06-29 08:32:09 PM

GypsyJoker: She goes topless in On the Road.

No, it's not CGI or a body double.


Damn, that Charles Kuralt was a real playa, eh?

/the rule is a middle-age white guy has to italicize such idioms, right?
 
2012-06-29 08:42:02 PM
We should see an SNL skit with her doing the "bassomatic" impersonating Akroid. That would be surreal.
 
2012-06-29 08:44:49 PM

T-Servo: [www.freeloader.co.uk image 330x330]

"Dull surprise..."

/not obscure


I actually like this pic. It say's to me "OK we can try that".
 
2012-06-29 08:52:13 PM
As opposed to currently looking like a whore?
 
2012-06-29 08:59:50 PM
Hey, she shows her tits and gives handjobs in "On The Road", so she's almost there!
 
2012-06-29 09:15:53 PM
www.bitlogic.com
 
2012-06-29 09:16:10 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I thought the hot new story was about the porn chick who farts for a living, not the one who looks like she's eternally smelling a fart for a living.


Cant be too picky. I'd smell her farts if she gives Mr. Happy a smile.
 
2012-06-29 09:21:06 PM
5a.img.v4.skyrock.net
 
2012-06-29 09:22:07 PM
I thought she was pretty hot as Joan Jett
 
2012-06-29 09:35:53 PM

FishyFred:

Sorry Kristen, but you just don't have that Ellen Page-ness about you..


If you remove Ellen Page's natural cuteness, her personality. and her soul....you get a Kristen Stewart.
 
2012-06-29 09:52:24 PM
Let me cook you some ramen noodles. After that, please sex me while I lay there completely uninterested.

What an attractive person!
 
2012-06-29 09:59:55 PM
Kristen Stewert was cursed with an expressionless face. She was blessed however, with the same name as my daughter, and the same last name as the most famous Jew on TV. I don't wanna steal anyone's thunder, but I''d like to feel I had something to do with it.
 
2012-06-29 10:20:02 PM
Jees, she seems like an emotionless stoner.

I would still love to have one night to see if all she does is lie there.

/I bet she does
 
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