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(Onion AV Club)   Sam Waterston reflects on his career as one of the most trustworthy-sounding actors on television, whether it was as a DA on Law & Order or a shill for Liberty Mutual Robot Insurance   (avclub.com ) divider line
    More: Cool, Sam Waterston, Aaron Sorkin, James McAvoy, Jerry Orbach, Av Club, newscasters, historical fictions, Avc  
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2421 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 29 Jun 2012 at 2:04 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-29 11:34:48 AM  
What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.
 
2012-06-29 11:38:32 AM  

Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.


Is this because I'm a lesbian?
 
2012-06-29 11:40:13 AM  

Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.


I thought that was the Perry Mason strategy of lawyering.

Anyway, if NBC hadn't stupidly canceled Law and Order classic for a bunch of shows that didn't even last a season, I wonder if Waterston would have still been on the show?
 
2012-06-29 11:41:15 AM  

mitchcumstein1: Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.

Is this because I'm a lesbian?


images.politico.com

No. No, of course not.
 
2012-06-29 11:47:35 AM  
He also made a Great Gatsby movie that I promptly forgot after watching.
 
2012-06-29 01:20:34 PM  
And now he plays a drunk with a news station.
 
2012-06-29 01:30:17 PM  

GAT_00: And now he plays a drunk with a news station.


A Trustworthy drunk with a news station.
 
2012-06-29 01:56:34 PM  

mitchcumstein1: Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.

Is this because I'm a lesbian?


it's because you're not a hot, pouty blonde one.
 
2012-06-29 02:06:39 PM  

GAT_00: And now he plays a drunk with a news station.


He looks so giddy playing that role, like he's having fun for the first time in his life.

/there's something disconcerting about hearing the word "fark" come out of his mouth.
 
2012-06-29 02:12:43 PM  
files.coloribus.com

Man, that thing does not like Duane.
 
2012-06-29 02:13:17 PM  

Dwight_Yeast: /there's something disconcerting about hearing the word "fark" come out of his mouth.


I was thinking the same thing when I heard it for the first time. I was like "Jack McCoy would never say that!"
 
2012-06-29 02:18:15 PM  
I hope he brings back Calvin and Hobbes.
 
2012-06-29 02:19:28 PM  

m1ke: Dwight_Yeast: /there's something disconcerting about hearing the word "fark" come out of his mouth.

I was thinking the same thing when I heard it for the first time. I was like "Jack McCoy would never say that!"


same here. Lenny Briscoe was my favorite...would have loved to have lunch with him.
 
2012-06-29 02:20:55 PM  

mitchcumstein1: Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.

Is this because I'm a lesbian?


No, it's because you're a lousy actor.
 
2012-06-29 02:30:47 PM  
Don't forget Old Glory insurance, subby.
 
2012-06-29 02:33:18 PM  

Strongbeerrules: mitchcumstein1: Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.

Is this because I'm a lesbian?

No, it's because you're a lousy actor.


That was odd. Was I supposed to know before the last 5 minutes of her last episode that she was a lesbian? Or am I just supposed to just be disappointed because when I see her I know I won't see Alana De La Garza?

1. Briscoe
2. McCoy
3. Van Buren
 
2012-06-29 02:34:42 PM  
Almost forgot:
Robots are scary. And they're made of metal
 
2012-06-29 02:38:29 PM  
i4.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-29 02:44:44 PM  

Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.


www.wearysloth.com

You'll never get a jury to convict!
 
2012-06-29 02:49:39 PM  
For when the metal ones come.
 
2012-06-29 02:58:20 PM  
Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.
 
2012-06-29 03:08:26 PM  
Who gives a shiat about Law and Order? When is he going to start doing Calvin & Hobbes again?
 
2012-06-29 03:25:22 PM  

feanorn: Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.


Yeah, I liked Ben Stone better myself. Too bad Michael Moriarty is a crazy drunk in real life.
 
2012-06-29 03:27:50 PM  

Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.


i172.photobucket.com

Figured it out years before.
 
2012-06-29 03:43:12 PM  

feanorn: Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.


I agree. As much as Moriarty is a nutcase, Stone was a boyscout.
 
2012-06-29 03:44:36 PM  

m1ke: e


m1ke: Dwight_Yeast: /there's something disconcerting about hearing the word "fark" come out of his mouth.

I was thinking the same thing when I heard it for the first time. I was like "Jack McCoy would never say that!"


For me, it was more like: "I know Jack McCoy was saying these things, but we just didn't get to hear it because of the FCC"
 
2012-06-29 03:50:17 PM  

carnifex2005: feanorn: Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.

Yeah, I liked Ben Stone better myself. Too bad Michael Moriarty is a crazy drunk in real life.


I say Michael Cutter was pretty damn good. He had the magnificent bastardry of Jack McCoy, and put Jack in the position of having to be the grown-up for a change.
 
2012-06-29 03:55:51 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: carnifex2005: feanorn: Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.

Yeah, I liked Ben Stone better myself. Too bad Michael Moriarty is a crazy drunk in real life.

I say Michael Cutter was pretty damn good. He had the magnificent bastardry of Jack McCoy, and put Jack in the position of having to be the grown-up for a change.


I was a huge fan of the last cast: Waterston and Merkerson, and added Linus Roache, Anthony Anderson, Jeremy Cisto, and Alana De la Garza. Should never have been canceled. I'd watch that cast narrating Family Circus and Garfield comics for a week straight. But it's just better when at a very fast pace they interview people who have no time to explain the details of the murders they witness.
 
2012-06-29 03:57:57 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: FirstNationalBastard: carnifex2005: feanorn: Yep. His L&O character was one of the most unprincipled, evil characters in the history of TV. He almost left you rooting for the baddies to get away with it.

Yeah, I liked Ben Stone better myself. Too bad Michael Moriarty is a crazy drunk in real life.

I say Michael Cutter was pretty damn good. He had the magnificent bastardry of Jack McCoy, and put Jack in the position of having to be the grown-up for a change.

I was a huge fan of the last cast: Waterston and Merkerson, and added Linus Roache, Anthony Anderson, Jeremy Cisto, and Alana De la Garza. Should never have been canceled. I'd watch that cast narrating Family Circus and Garfield comics for a week straight. But it's just better when at a very fast pace they interview people who have no time to explain the details of the murders they witness.


I also loved the last cast. They were probably the best L&O cast since Jerry Orbach died.

And I still don't understand why NBC canceled the show, especially since every drama they've put on since then has been canceled after a season.

/oh, wait, Leno ruined everything, didn't he?
 
2012-06-29 04:12:49 PM  
(read this in less than 7 seconds)
Detective:
Sir, SIR! Do you know the woman in this picture?

Interviewee (moving crates on loading dock) : I gotta unload 3000 more trucks before noon.

Detective: This will only take a minute. (shows picture)

Interviewee: That's Joan Danvers. She ran the diamond store on 45th. Look, I'm in a hurry. Something happen?

Detective: She was shot and her intestines were torn out and the murderer ate her heart and threatened to kill everyone in the world.

Interviewee: Doesn't surprise me. Joan was always running with a bad crowd. Have you talked to her husband?

Detective: She's married?

Interviewee: Was. Joan caught Jerry cheating and was looking to take him for half his business.

Detective: Do you know wher-

Interviewee (interrupting): I really gotta go.

(closes loading dock door)
(Scene)
 
2012-06-29 04:15:15 PM  

Balchinian: I hope he brings back Calvin and Hobbes.


Dammitsomuch.
 
2012-06-29 04:21:42 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: (read this in less than 7 seconds)
Detective: Sir, SIR! Do you know the woman in this picture?

Interviewee (moving crates on loading dock) : I gotta unload 3000 more trucks before noon.

Detective: This will only take a minute. (shows picture)

Interviewee: That's Joan Danvers. She ran the diamond store on 45th. Look, I'm in a hurry. Something happen?

Detective: She was shot and her intestines were torn out and the murderer ate her heart and threatened to kill everyone in the world.

Interviewee: Doesn't surprise me. Joan was always running with a bad crowd. Have you talked to her husband?

Detective: She's married?

Interviewee: Was. Joan caught Jerry cheating and was looking to take him for half his business.

Detective: Do you know wher-

Interviewee (interrupting): I really gotta go.

(closes loading dock door)
(Scene)


Every now and then there was the "Hey, you can answer our questions here, or we'll drag you downtown, tell your boss, and maybe sodomize your cat" variant.
 
2012-06-29 04:54:56 PM  
I wonder if he'll star again in Terminator 5.
 
2012-06-29 05:23:26 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Nana's Vibrator: (read this in less than 7 seconds)
Detective: Sir, SIR! Do you know the woman in this picture?

Interviewee (moving crates on loading dock) : I gotta unload 3000 more trucks before noon.

Detective: This will only take a minute. (shows picture)

Interviewee: That's Joan Danvers. She ran the diamond store on 45th. Look, I'm in a hurry. Something happen?

Detective: She was shot and her intestines were torn out and the murderer ate her heart and threatened to kill everyone in the world.

Interviewee: Doesn't surprise me. Joan was always running with a bad crowd. Have you talked to her husband?

Detective: She's married?

Interviewee: Was. Joan caught Jerry cheating and was looking to take him for half his business.

Detective: Do you know wher-

Interviewee (interrupting): I really gotta go.

(closes loading dock door)
(Scene)

Every now and then there was the "Hey, you can answer our questions here, or we'll drag you downtown, tell your boss, and maybe sodomize your cat" variant.


Ice-T really added a lot to the show.
 
2012-06-29 05:23:30 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Nana's Vibrator: (read this in less than 7 seconds)
Detective: Sir, SIR! Do you know the woman in this picture?

Interviewee (moving crates on loading dock) : I gotta unload 3000 more trucks before noon.

Detective: This will only take a minute. (shows picture)

Interviewee: That's Joan Danvers. She ran the diamond store on 45th. Look, I'm in a hurry. Something happen?

Detective: She was shot and her intestines were torn out and the murderer ate her heart and threatened to kill everyone in the world.

Interviewee: Doesn't surprise me. Joan was always running with a bad crowd. Have you talked to her husband?

Detective: She's married?

Interviewee: Was. Joan caught Jerry cheating and was looking to take him for half his business.

Detective: Do you know wher-

Interviewee (interrupting): I really gotta go.

(closes loading dock door)
(Scene)

Every now and then there was the "Hey, you can answer our questions here, or we'll drag you downtown, tell your boss, and maybe sodomize your cat" variant.


The Community spoof of Law & Order this season was note perfect that way. Highly recommend any L&O fan to watch it.
 
2012-06-29 05:33:16 PM  
It was Old Glory Insurance, failmitter.
 
2012-06-29 05:51:39 PM  
No love for Sam's unforgettable role as funnyman in 'Capricorn One'?

/ She's on the roof...
 
2012-06-29 06:26:48 PM  
fark L&O. Mr. Waterston's best was Nick in The Great Gatsby. He brought depth to a sympathetic character, someone on the outside looking in. Law & Order's character was just an easy steady paycheck for someone of Waterston's caliber of talent IMHO.

I'd like to see how he would fare as an international threat villain in an old school, we still grope the girls 007 film.
 
2012-06-29 06:39:19 PM  

KrispyKritter: I'd like to see how he would fare as an international threat villain in an old school, we still grope the girls 007 film.


Is this because I'm a lesbian?
 
2012-06-29 07:12:00 PM  

jayhawk88: Pocket Ninja: What he taught me on Law and Order is that a law degree is absolutely unnecessary to be a successful trial lawyer. All you have to do is yell at the witness long enough about how they know they're really guilty, and they'll admit it.

[www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

You'll never get a jury to convict!


Steven Hill is 90 years old. It shouldn't surprise me, but it does. Hope he still has his wits about him.
 
2012-06-29 07:38:43 PM  

stir22:

same here. Lenny Briscoe was my favorite...would have loved to have lunch with him.


Heheh yeah, Det. Briscoe is definitely in my top ten of "Fictional Characters I'd Like to Hang Out With."

But ... Here's a totally geeky thought to keep you up tonight

When they added Richard Belzer's Det. Munch to Law & Order: SVU, they indelibly connected Law & Order and The X-Files. I would have loved to have seen Mulder and Briscoe run into each other. The snark would have been off the Richter scale
 
2012-06-29 07:47:11 PM  
Has anyone mentioned that it's Old Glory Insurance, tardmitter?
 
2012-06-29 08:00:17 PM  

KrispyKritter: fark L&O. Mr. Waterston's best was Nick in The Great Gatsby. He brought depth to a sympathetic character, someone on the outside looking in. Law & Order's character was just an easy steady paycheck for someone of Waterston's caliber of talent IMHO.

I'd like to see how he would fare as an international threat villain in an old school, we still grope the girls 007 film.


He was also good in Crimes and Misdemeanors. Nonetheless, I miss Law and Order lots.
 
2012-06-29 08:37:56 PM  

KrispyKritter: fark L&O. Mr. Waterston's best was Nick in The Great Gatsby. He brought depth to a sympathetic character, someone on the outside looking in. Law & Order's character was just an easy steady paycheck for someone of Waterston's caliber of talent IMHO.

I'd like to see how he would fare as an international threat villain in an old school, we still grope the girls 007 film.


His role in Heaven's Gate was pretty close to that.
 
2012-06-29 08:39:37 PM  
Tv is such a temporary medium. Decades from now Jerry Orbach will be remembered for this. No one will even know what the hell Law and Order was.
 
2012-06-29 09:17:03 PM  
Fred Thompson is hocking reverse mortgages all over TV. Everytime I see that damn commercial my mind does a mash-up of the Old Glory Insurance sketch and tricks me into thinking Fred's selling old people reverse-vampire insurance.
 
2012-06-29 09:43:10 PM  
Anyone who managed to sit thru Heavens Gate saw Waterston play one evil bloodsucking killer SOB land baron who ends up killing about 500 Eastern European immigrants in Wyoming. Not always in nice guy roles
 
2012-06-29 10:32:01 PM  

T.M.S.: Tv is such a temporary medium. Decades from now Jerry Orbach will be remembered for this. No one will even know what the hell Law and Order was.


As long as TNT and USA are around w/ their endless marathons of L&O and SVU reruns, people will never forget that show.

/I tend to watch an ep. when there is nothing else on, and end up watching the whole damn marathon.
//That Mariska Hargitay is a nice-looking piece.
 
2012-06-29 10:47:12 PM  
Aside from his enthusiasm for the death penalty, Jack McCoy was one of my favorite characters on television. Flawed, but very moral and enthusiastic. I don't have HBO, which means I can't see this new show.
 
2012-06-29 10:49:34 PM  

Cubicle Jockey: As much as Moriarty is a nutcase, Stone was a boyscout.


That's still so weird for me. I'll catch an older L&O once in a blue moon, and I love Stone, but the whole time I keep imagining him spouting off wingnut conspiracy theories.
 
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