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(Detroit Free Press)   Someone considered the problem of drunk driving and said "You know what we need? Talking urinal cakes"   (freep.com) divider line 52
    More: Silly, Urinal deodorizer block, urinals, Michigan  
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2935 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jun 2012 at 3:27 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-28 01:15:25 PM  
I only approve of talking urinal cakes if the sound chip inside is programmed with the Wicked Witch of the West's voice saying "I'M MELLLLLLLTING" when you piss on it.
 
2012-06-28 01:20:17 PM  
Not sure they've thought this all the way through

/Speaking as a former bartender, I can assure you that the majority of drunks aren't real good at hitting the urinal, much less the urinal cake
 
2012-06-28 01:43:56 PM  
Someone was stoned when they thought that up
 
2012-06-28 01:45:03 PM  
If I hear a urinal cake talking to me, I'll wonder who spiked my drink.
 
2012-06-28 01:54:53 PM  
I've peed into a number of fantastic urinals, including this gem:

i90.photobucket.com

I'm all for anything that enhances the experience of urination, even when it's out to encourage safety.
 
2012-06-28 02:23:00 PM  
So do they install the urinal cakes in people's cars?
 
2012-06-28 03:08:40 PM  
So, what about women? Apparently we're supposed to hold a urinal cake between our thighs?
 
2012-06-28 03:12:10 PM  

GGracie: So, what about women? Apparently we're supposed to hold a urinal cake between our thighs?


That's the birth control element of the plan
 
2012-06-28 03:29:25 PM  
Meh. Tell me when they start making them taste better.
 
2012-06-28 03:31:42 PM  
Will the cakes move in time to the talking? That would be impressive.
 
2012-06-28 03:32:11 PM  
they didn't talk before?

but then...
 
2012-06-28 03:33:12 PM  
Talking urinal cakes? Now that would really piss me off.
 
2012-06-28 03:34:02 PM  
wouldnt it be better if the cake then told you how drunk you were?
 
2012-06-28 03:34:52 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: /Speaking as a former bartender, I can assure you that the majority of drunks aren't real good at hitting the urinal, much less the urinal cake


This is why we need more urinals with targets. Such a simple addition would make lives easier for bartenders worldwide.
 
2012-06-28 03:35:05 PM  

hammettman: I've peed into a number of fantastic urinals, including this gem:

[i90.photobucket.com image 597x799]

I'm all for anything that enhances the experience of urination, even when it's out to encourage safety.


How interesting! The Gym I go to has a very similar setup for their Urinals.

i.imgur.com

Not quite as ornate though.
 
2012-06-28 03:35:36 PM  

GGracie: So, what about women? Apparently we're supposed to hold a urinal cake between our thighs?


For women, a dispenser for talking tampons has been installed.
 
2012-06-28 03:36:45 PM  
This isn't new.
The little Asian girl I pee on tells me if I've drank too much to drive.
 
2012-06-28 03:38:19 PM  
Will R. Kelly be providing the voice?
 
2012-06-28 03:39:26 PM  

nimeye: Meh. Tell me when they start making them taste better.


I try to get the ones with icing.
 
2012-06-28 03:40:10 PM  
I think this might work a bit better if people were using getting high when they pissed. hearing talking urinal cakes *might* convince them not to drive.
 
2012-06-28 03:41:54 PM  
Do they sound like Obama or Hitler or Sandusky?
 
2012-06-28 03:43:57 PM  
"damn, I must be drunk, I keep hearing voices when I pee"
 
2012-06-28 03:49:11 PM  
Am I the only one that actually pictured a urinal cake with a face that robotically spoke? Sometimes I have no common sense.
 
2012-06-28 03:51:20 PM  
i.qkme.me
 
2012-06-28 03:51:55 PM  

schattenteufel: This isn't new.
The little Asian girl I pee on tells me if I've drank too much to drive.


www.washingtonpost.com
 
2012-06-28 03:55:17 PM  
will this enhance sex in any way??
 
2012-06-28 03:55:28 PM  
I... Cannot... Resist... Must... Post...

What a talking urinal cake might say to motivate someone:

"Oooh, yes! Yes! Oh, that's so farking hot! Give me your piss, you scorching hot stud!"

New KinkyKakes by WaterSports Products
 
2012-06-28 03:55:33 PM  
Do they scream, "Don't eat me!"
 
2012-06-28 03:58:48 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: will this enhance sex in any way??


Only if you're a urinal farker.

/wow...this water is cold
//and DEEP
 
2012-06-28 04:07:46 PM  
"I'm melting!"
 
2012-06-28 04:13:00 PM  

Current Resident: Will R. Kelly be providing the voice?


No it'll be Dave Chapelle as R Kelly:
 
2012-06-28 04:13:09 PM  

IXI Jim IXI: Do they scream, "Don't eat me!"


cdn0.hark.com

He certainly hopes so.
 
2012-06-28 04:17:16 PM  
Hearing a talking urinal cake will probably startle me in my drunken state and make me pee on my feet...or the dude next to me.
 
2012-06-28 04:18:12 PM  
Can you measure BAC through urine tests? Maybe that would have been more useful.

"You're at 0.08"

15 minutes later: "You're at 0.075. Speed on home, sailor!"
 
2012-06-28 04:19:08 PM  
I hope this doesn't affect the delicious taste.
 
2012-06-28 04:20:26 PM  
The hacking potential of this is epic, provided you can get one that hasn't yet been pissed upon.

Imagine the look on some underendowed shlub's face when the urinal cake starts laughing at him.
 
2012-06-28 04:30:19 PM  

hp6sa: Can you measure BAC through urine tests? Maybe that would have been more useful.

"You're at 0.08"

15 minutes later: "You're at 0.075. Speed on home, sailor!"


you're at 134usafusdjakhfskdjh ERROR ERROR *zap*
 
2012-06-28 04:36:27 PM  

frisland: wouldnt it be better if the cake then told you how drunk you were?


That's what I thought when I read the headline at first but I'm really glad some joker didn't have this idea when I was a regular user of LSD.
 
2012-06-28 04:53:50 PM  
What we need is people who care about

1. Not driving drunk, and putting people in danger.
2. Not driving drunk, and thinking about "its all me"
3. Not driving drunk, and save some lives.
4. Quit being assholes and think of others, and what could possibly happen if they drive drunk.

/Probably not gonna happen, and people are going to want to party, and do it on their own terms, and fark everyone else. It's only after something tragic happens that they get hindsight.
 
2012-06-28 05:08:42 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: I only approve of talking urinal cakes if the sound chip inside is programmed with the Wicked Witch of the West's voice saying "I'M MELLLLLLLTING" when you piss on it.


Goddamn, now I wish I was a man so I had a vested interest in making that happen.

"What a world, what a world..."
 
2012-06-28 05:10:36 PM  
"Martha "Big Mouth" Raye here for Urinal Cakes just letting you know that 'Urine" no shape to drive! Pee on me drunky!"
 
2012-06-28 05:49:58 PM  
I would want to have too much fun with the recordings... especially messing with drunk men ;-)

"Congratulations! Your urine test revealed that you're pregnant"

"Mmmm... Someone's been drinking pineapple juice ;-)

"Dude, what the hell are all of those red sores on your dick?"

"You have bits of toilet paper in your butt crack"

"You don't actually get laid with that night crawler you're peeing out of do you?"

"OH SH*T! Not to alarm you, but you need to go see a doctor, now."

"Are those your balls or a new kind of furry slinky?"
 
2012-06-28 05:58:12 PM  
This is so wrong.

First rule of the men's room: there's no talking in the men's room.
 
2012-06-28 05:59:52 PM  

GGracie: I would want to have too much fun with the recordings... especially messing with drunk men ;-)

"Congratulations! Your urine test revealed that you're pregnant"

"Mmmm... Someone's been drinking pineapple juice ;-)

"Dude, what the hell are all of those red sores on your dick?"

"You have bits of toilet paper in your butt crack"

"You don't actually get laid with that night crawler you're peeing out of do you?"

"OH SH*T! Not to alarm you, but you need to go see a doctor, now."

"Are those your balls or a new kind of furry slinky?"


"HARCOURT!! HARCOURT FENTON MUDD!!"
 
2012-06-28 06:01:34 PM  
"You know what we need? Talking urinal cakes"

Or as we call them, "Polish Breathmints"
 
2012-06-28 06:04:08 PM  
"I'm thirsty for your pee!"
 
2012-06-28 06:36:15 PM  
Would it be funny if they spoke German?
 
2012-06-28 06:43:29 PM  

GGracie: "You don't actually get laid with that night crawler you're peeing out of do you?"


no, i don't

thanks for the shame pee
 
2012-06-28 06:47:08 PM  
On another note GIS for urinal cake was worse than this tread
 
2012-06-28 07:37:36 PM  
Or... there should make urinal cakes that'll test the alcohol content in pee and THEN tell them to take a cab.
 
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