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(WQAD Quad Cities)   Pro tip: If two teen girls willingly go to your hotel room at four in the morning, expect a robbery (with teen girl mug shot goodness in the video)   ( divider line
    More: Scary, teenage girls, robbery, hotels  
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22768 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jun 2012 at 2:07 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-06-27 05:27:44 AM  
5 votes:
Oh my God! I got robbed by this group! I was at a club, decided it was time to leave and started warming up my Trailblazer. All of a sudden, these two girls jump in. Before I could say anything one is making out with me and the other is unzipping my fly. They take turns back and forth for around 10 minutes or so before they also take turns mounting me. One riding while the other makes out with me or plays with my dangling goods until an explosive completion. In my orgasmic afterglow, I neglect to notice their 3 male friends creeping up along the side of my truck! They drag me out, club me in the head with a slapjack and steal my wallet! It happened again the week after, the week after, the week after, the week after, the week after and the week after that! I've wondered where they've been!

/started wearing a motorcycle helmet after the 3rd week. Just pretending to be unconscious!
2012-06-27 06:57:42 AM  
4 votes:
At least the girls synchronized their hair flip. They look very nice one to the right and one to the left, good fung shei

magicmoviemachine.comView Full Size
2012-06-27 02:13:30 AM  
4 votes:
shamusyoung.comView Full Size
2012-06-27 02:34:18 AM  
3 votes:
I hate it when a guy with a knife robs me at gunpoint.

"after they allegedly robbed two men at gun point"
"three masked men came into the room with a knife."

I'm surprised it wasn't an assault rifle knife.
2012-06-27 12:26:44 PM  
2 votes:

Piestar: That is a weird speech impediment the newscaster has...

Welcome to the Quad Cities. Not big enough to get real reporters and anchors, yet large enough to have problems like this.

Stay classy, Quad Cities...
2012-06-27 08:51:47 AM  
2 votes:
An Urgent Warning about HOME DEPOT SCAM


A `heads up' for you and any friends you have who may be regular
Home Depot customers.

Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.

Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic.

Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping in the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling
out of their skimpy t-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Home Depot. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen June 1st, 3rd, 6th, twice on the 7th, three
times just yesterday, and very likely again this weekend.

Again - please beware
2012-06-27 03:06:28 AM  
2 votes:

ArcadianRefugee: So, is subby a professional thief, professional victim, or just a dumbass who doesn't understand what the "pro" in "protip" means?

Subby here. After five years of chasing stories like this as a television reporter and then eight years as a college cop dealing with various crimes and misdemeanors, I think I have a pretty good idea of how to advise the criminal element in my community. So, fark off, ok?
2012-06-27 02:27:36 AM  
2 votes:

NephilimNexus: Anyone bringing teenage girls to a hotel at 4am is not going to get a lot of sympathy from the general public, either.

And you're telling me this now?.
2012-06-27 01:33:48 PM  
1 vote:
Don't trust them for sure!

Once started talking to this total hottie while out....she offered to take me and my 2 buddies back to the closest apartment (my friend's) and she'd put on a show and a lil' more *wink-wink*. Something was not right and after some ribbing from my friends I left (plus who wants to share with 2 other dudes??). They did whatever, "nothing" according to them, but she at least gave them a shower show, and they took pics.

She was picked up the next day as a child runaway......

Strangely enough this was not the first time something like this happened in our circle.
2012-06-27 09:09:14 AM  
1 vote:
Broch is my friend's dumbass cousin.

Here is his latest status update.

"Broch Leftwich
Sunday via mobile
fark the haters and fark the fakes ain't no snitchs eatin off my plate
12 people like this."
2012-06-27 08:30:22 AM  
1 vote:
That is exactly why I don't have girls willingly come into my hotel room.

/duct tape is your friend.
2012-06-27 06:26:49 AM  
1 vote:
Well, I put that in the wrong comment section somehow. Too damn early in the morning.
2012-06-27 06:26:03 AM  
1 vote:

tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: t

Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )

You love what? IHOP pancakes? Because I'm with you there.

I also love love booze which is why I shouldn't be posting right now. Although hell yeah IHOP rocks after a night. Um, with that said I should crash and you just well, just keep being you ; )

Get a room you too.

Then send pictures.
2012-06-27 04:28:13 AM  
1 vote:
My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.

When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.

We were much happier there.
2012-06-27 03:58:17 AM  
1 vote:

Also curious how you do a stint as a cop (or 'cop') after having been a reporter. Aren't they, like, mortal enemies or something?

My understanding is that the two often work very closely together. Reporters rely on cops for stories. Cops rely on reporters to get/not get certain information to the public. At least that's how it was on The Wire.

Sometimes they clash. And sometimes, not always, but sometimes, they fall in love.

2012-06-27 03:05:41 AM  
1 vote:

Old Man Winter: "the woman jumps away, and opens the closet, to which jumps out a big black man, wearing nothing but a Batman mask and cape."

How it could have ended.

Some of us pay good money for that.
2012-06-27 02:58:34 AM  
1 vote:

G-Rot: "Never trust a beautiful woman who is interested in you." - Magneto

2012-06-27 02:55:58 AM  
1 vote:
Am I wrong for wanting to totally fark the brains out of the girl on the right?
2012-06-27 02:49:52 AM  
1 vote:

CygnusDarius: You said 'rape' twice.

files.myfrogbag.comView Full Size
2012-06-27 02:44:53 AM  
1 vote:

illannoyin: [ image 640x365]

Is that middle guy Ron Weasley?

The girl on the right is already on the downward slope toward full on meth zombie.

Let this be a warning to all you would be johns. Make sure you do what my buddies did back in my army days to avoid getting "trick rolled". When the hos show up take turns standing guard outside to make sure you get what you paid for.

Or, just do what I did and be content to have a wank and a good night's sleep.

A girl I knew in high school is slightly internet famous for this very thing...


Where in Illinois did you have the chance to grow up with that fine thing?
2012-06-27 02:19:43 AM  
1 vote:
Those kids are worthy of a mugshop roundup.

Although, with names like Madison and Brianne, they should be crying over lattes at Starbucks, not robbing people.
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