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(WQAD Quad Cities)   Pro tip: If two teen girls willingly go to your hotel room at four in the morning, expect a robbery (with teen girl mug shot goodness in the video)   (wqad.com) divider line 111
    More: Scary, teenage girls, robbery, hotels  
•       •       •

22724 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jun 2012 at 2:07 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-27 03:58:17 AM  

ArcadianRefugee:
Also curious how you do a stint as a cop (or 'cop') after having been a reporter. Aren't they, like, mortal enemies or something?


My understanding is that the two often work very closely together. Reporters rely on cops for stories. Cops rely on reporters to get/not get certain information to the public. At least that's how it was on The Wire.

Sometimes they clash. And sometimes, not always, but sometimes, they fall in love.

/Protip
 
2012-06-27 03:58:28 AM  

meathome: Hey genius.

It's been meme for the headlines since Fark first popped on the web.


No shiat.

Doesn't make it any less stupid than it was back then either.

i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2012-06-27 04:02:03 AM  

skantea: Too easy is always a red flag. There are people these days trying to pass on herpes out of revenge. I know it's not fatal, but the monthly meds sound expensive.

/uninsured :(


I'll take your word about the herpes thing, but otherwise THIS.

Doesn't matter what you look like, doesn't matter all that much how much you make. If it's too easy, I guarantee you that there's a flip side to that coin which you are not going to enjoy (at best you're getting the crazy/drama, at worst you're ending up on the news).

Some folks say you're safe so long as you're not paying for it. Not often I see someone who doesn't pay for it in one way or the other...

"Too good to be true" definitely applies in most cases.

I see a lot of this crap at conventions. Nearly been a victim of it a few times by women who wanted to buy me a drink or pick me up at the hotel bar.

Fortunately/Unfortunately ego isn't big enough to think that hot women auto(take your pick) my ego isn't big enough to think that hot women would automatically come up to me in a public setting and throw themselves at me. This realization has saved my butt more than a few times (and helped me to avoid sleeping with teh crazy on a few occasions as well).

/sad, but true
//has a face for radio, and made a decent second living out of it
 
2012-06-27 04:07:27 AM  

ArcadianRefugee: Doesn't make it any less stupid than it was back then either.


Yeah, how dare these people use a phrase which has been prevalent in American English since at least 1995. What are they, atavists?
 
2012-06-27 04:09:18 AM  

HotWingAgenda: ArcadianRefugee: Doesn't make it any less stupid than it was back then either.

Yeah, how dare these people use a phrase which has been prevalent in American English since at least 1995. What are they, atavists?


I am usually a fan of anal but Arcadian just ruined it for me.
 
2012-06-27 04:09:57 AM  

ArcadianRefugee: meathome: Hey genius.

It's been meme for the headlines since Fark first popped on the web.

No shiat.

Doesn't make it any less stupid than it was back then either.

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 225x225]


Ah, Nintendo Power. The John Madden of the NES.
 
2012-06-27 04:16:26 AM  

skantea: Too easy is always a red flag.


So is too cheap (assuming they were posing as hookers, which seems likely).

If a deal is too good to be true, it probably is.
 
2012-06-27 04:28:13 AM  
My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.


When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.


We were much happier there.
 
2012-06-27 04:28:57 AM  
illannoyin:
A girl I knew in high school is slightly internet famous for this very thing...

Link


Goddamn, that's a rough 26.
 
2012-06-27 04:31:07 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.


When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.


We were much happier there.


Another reason to love IHOP.
 
2012-06-27 04:38:25 AM  

Sabyen91: tinfoil-hat maggie:

Another reason to love IHOP.


Very true ; )
 
2012-06-27 04:40:50 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.

When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.

We were much happier there.


tnation.t-nation.com
 
2012-06-27 04:44:33 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: We were much happier there.


Cool story, sis.

Hope you've got yourself cleaned up since then.
 
2012-06-27 04:52:34 AM  

clyph: tinfoil-hat maggie: We were much happier there.

Cool story, sis.

Hope you've got yourself cleaned up since then.


That was a poem by one Maggie Estep, not me and well she has lots of cool stories. Although mine wouldn't be much better but still can't claim credit.
 
2012-06-27 05:01:49 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: clyph: tinfoil-hat maggie: We were much happier there.

Cool story, sis.

Hope you've got yourself cleaned up since then.

That was a poem by one Maggie Estep, not me and well she has lots of cool stories. Although mine wouldn't be much better but still can't claim credit.


Hey baby yo baby hey baby yo baby yo yo yo baby yo yo yo.

/B&B introduced me to Maggie Estep
 
2012-06-27 05:12:33 AM  

untaken_name: tinfoil-hat maggie: clyph: tinfoil-hat maggie: We were much happier there.

Cool story, sis.

Hope you've got yourself cleaned up since then.

That was a poem by one Maggie Estep, not me and well she has lots of cool stories. Although mine wouldn't be much better but still can't claim credit.

Hey baby yo baby hey baby yo baby yo yo yo baby yo yo yo.

/B&B introduced me to Maggie Estep


Hey you know it ; )
/I got to post that in a thread on wolf whistles.
//She's got a song for everything or a poem depends on how you look at it.
 
2012-06-27 05:27:44 AM  
Oh my God! I got robbed by this group! I was at a club, decided it was time to leave and started warming up my Trailblazer. All of a sudden, these two girls jump in. Before I could say anything one is making out with me and the other is unzipping my fly. They take turns back and forth for around 10 minutes or so before they also take turns mounting me. One riding while the other makes out with me or plays with my dangling goods until an explosive completion. In my orgasmic afterglow, I neglect to notice their 3 male friends creeping up along the side of my truck! They drag me out, club me in the head with a slapjack and steal my wallet! It happened again the week after, the week after, the week after, the week after, the week after and the week after that! I've wondered where they've been!

/started wearing a motorcycle helmet after the 3rd week. Just pretending to be unconscious!
 
2012-06-27 05:33:43 AM  

miss diminutive: t


Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )
 
2012-06-27 05:38:09 AM  

miss diminutive: tinfoil-hat maggie: My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.

When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.

We were much happier there.

[tnation.t-nation.com image 299x448]


are spentmiles sister? cause you sound like him alot.
 
2012-06-27 05:42:46 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: t

Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )


You love what? IHOP pancakes? Because I'm with you there.
 
2012-06-27 05:56:42 AM  

miss diminutive: tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: t

Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )

You love what? IHOP pancakes? Because I'm with you there.


I also love love booze which is why I shouldn't be posting right now. Although hell yeah IHOP rocks after a night. Um, with that said I should crash and you just well, just keep being you ; )
 
2012-06-27 06:21:12 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: t

Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )

You love what? IHOP pancakes? Because I'm with you there.

I also love love booze which is why I shouldn't be posting right now. Although hell yeah IHOP rocks after a night. Um, with that said I should crash and you just well, just keep being you ; )


Right back atcha. =)
 
2012-06-27 06:25:49 AM  
FTA:
The researchers believe that gym rats are more likely to look down upon a woman who doesn't hold up to his standard of body fitness and beauty.

I really don't grasp what's so shallow or wrong about this. If you are someone that values keeping your body fit, you will probably admire women who do the same. I grew up a competitive swimmer, therefore I find myself very attracted to the female swimmer/diver body type.

It's pretty much how intelligent people will admire others that are intellectually active. In both cases, it's something a person has to work for. Granted, there will always be some people who are born thin or more intelligent -- but in the end, our attractions will ultimately revolve about what we view as good personal traits.
 
2012-06-27 06:26:03 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: tinfoil-hat maggie: miss diminutive: t

Oh, and I just have to say, you know I love right? Don't worry were cool, but glad you liked ; )

You love what? IHOP pancakes? Because I'm with you there.

I also love love booze which is why I shouldn't be posting right now. Although hell yeah IHOP rocks after a night. Um, with that said I should crash and you just well, just keep being you ; )


Get a room you too.
Please.

Then send pictures.
 
2012-06-27 06:26:49 AM  
Well, I put that in the wrong comment section somehow. Too damn early in the morning.
 
2012-06-27 06:32:48 AM  

Blink: Well, I put that in the wrong comment section somehow. Too damn early in the morning.


It still sort of fits!
 
2012-06-27 06:46:00 AM  
This is an epidemic. A similar thing happened to me 3 weeks ago. Two gorgeous 19 year olds tricked me into going back to their hotel room, had their way with me and stole my wallet. Then the same thing happened with the same girls 2 days later, the following Thursday, the subsequent Saturday, etc.
 
2012-06-27 06:49:13 AM  

davidphogan: Well, duh. If you come to my hotel room at 4am I'd assume you would want to be raped, robbed or raped.

But if you're a pro at this, I have to wonder how and why?


You Said Rape Twice
 
2012-06-27 06:57:42 AM  
At least the girls synchronized their hair flip. They look very nice one to the right and one to the left, good fung shei

www.magicmoviemachine.com
 
2012-06-27 07:09:24 AM  
Two girls who look like that could have had all these guys' money without resorting to guns or splitting the proceeds with three (additional) thugs.

And the one on the right isn't a "meth zombie." That's what girls look like when they don't eat Krispy Kreme twice a day.
 
2012-06-27 07:16:31 AM  
Good for them. They realized they have a certain skill and they used it. Really don't feel bad for the victim here.
 
2012-06-27 07:26:04 AM  
Stole passports? Looks like someone was visiting from another country and believed the stories that all American girls are easy.
 
2012-06-27 08:04:34 AM  
Koodz
And the one on the right isn't a "meth zombie." That's what girls look like when they don't eat Krispy Kreme twice a day

using her earlobe as the reference mark and drawing a invisible line across her face i see someone who has lost a ton of weight from her face.her face is getting the textbook upside down pear shape of a methhead.
 
2012-06-27 08:27:51 AM  

starlost: Koodz
And the one on the right isn't a "meth zombie." That's what girls look like when they don't eat Krispy Kreme twice a day

using her earlobe as the reference mark and drawing a invisible line across her face i see someone who has lost a ton of weight from her face.her face is getting the textbook upside down pear shape of a methhead.


Yep. That is the only way to lose weight. You nailed it.
 
2012-06-27 08:30:22 AM  
That is exactly why I don't have girls willingly come into my hotel room.

/duct tape is your friend.
 
2012-06-27 08:32:25 AM  

CygnusDarius: untaken_name: I hate it when a guy with a knife robs me at gunpoint.

FTFA:
"after they allegedly robbed two men at gun point"
"three masked men came into the room with a knife."

I'm surprised it wasn't an assault rifle knife.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 425x240]


Is that an Ak-47 or a Glock?
 
2012-06-27 08:45:20 AM  
So the Protip is to make sure it is unwilling. Gothca, done and done. Now where did i put my duct tape?
 
2012-06-27 08:51:47 AM  
An Urgent Warning about HOME DEPOT SCAM

HOME DEPOT SCAM;

A `heads up' for you and any friends you have who may be regular
Home Depot customers.

Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.

Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic.

Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping in the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling
out of their skimpy t-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Home Depot. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen June 1st, 3rd, 6th, twice on the 7th, three
times just yesterday, and very likely again this weekend.

Again - please beware
 
2012-06-27 08:53:28 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.


When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.


We were much happier there.


LMFAO is this pocket ninja or spent miles?
 
2012-06-27 09:09:14 AM  
Broch is my friend's dumbass cousin.

Here is his latest status update.

"Broch Leftwich
Sunday via mobile
fark the haters and fark the fakes ain't no snitchs eatin off my plate
Share
12 people like this."
 
2012-06-27 09:21:24 AM  
FTA: ... about 4 am Monday morning.

Not 4 am Monday afternoon. Just making sure.
 
Biv
2012-06-27 09:34:12 AM  
The most annoying part of this story? Girls this hot never need to break the law to make money.
 
2012-06-27 09:51:42 AM  
monsieurlion.com
 
2012-06-27 09:55:16 AM  
That Brianne is a hardcorps Wigga!

/note to self, never leave your back to Brianne
 
2012-06-27 09:57:51 AM  

ranev700: Remarkable_Anus: I've read the Facebook page of Brianne....Wow....Just Wow.

/sad

You think that's sad, check out Brock's page
Link


I think he still might be able to pull it off. You know being a Burger King manager is still within his grasp.
 
2012-06-27 09:58:03 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: My first job was when I was about 15. I had met
a girl named Hope who became my best friend. Hope and I were flunking math
class so we became speed freaks. This honed our algebra skills and we quickly
became whiz kids. For about 5 minutes. Then, our brains started to fry
and we were just teenage speed freaks.

Then, we decided to to seek gainful employment.

We got hired on as part time maids at the Holiday Inn while a maid strike
was happening. We were scab maids on speed and we were coming to clean
your room.

We were subsequently fired for pilfering a Holiday Inn guest's quaalude
stash which we did only because we never thought someone would have the
nerve to call the front desk and say; THE MAIDS STOLE MY LUUDES MAN. But
someone did - or so we surmised - because we were fired.

I supppose maybe we were fired because we never actually CLEANED but rather
just turned on the vacuum so it SOUNDED like we were cleaning as we picked
the pubic hairs off the sheets and out of the tub then passed out on the
bed and caught up on the sleep we'd missed from being up all night speeding.


When we got fired, we became waitresses at an International House of Pancakes.


We were much happier there.


Wow. I completely forgot she existed. I'm digging that CD out when I get home tonight.
 
2012-06-27 10:05:04 AM  

ranev700: Remarkable_Anus: I've read the Facebook page of Brianne....Wow....Just Wow.

/sad

You think that's sad, check out Brock's page
Link


That's some grade A wigga derp right there.

Silly kids and their "Yo, MTV Raps"
 
2012-06-27 10:36:07 AM  
OhLuverly

I've always disliked the use of the term "teenage" when referring to an 18 or 19 year old. Yes technically they are in their teens, however the term just makes it seem like they are underage girls not legal adults.

It guarantees readership by hinting at lurid details. Of young women. Young, bosomy women. Young, bosomy, nubile, naive women who are exploring the newness of life. Young, bosomy women who are not so experienced that they'll scorn your futile attempts at ...

Dang it, lost my train of thought.
 
2012-06-27 11:07:09 AM  

MythDragon: CygnusDarius: untaken_name: I hate it when a guy with a knife robs me at gunpoint.

FTFA:
"after they allegedly robbed two men at gun point"
"three masked men came into the room with a knife."

I'm surprised it wasn't an assault rifle knife.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 425x240]

Is that an Ak-47 or a Glock?


It's a German made, ceramic Glock.
 
2012-06-27 11:26:13 AM  
clyph

There's a big difference between being club-hot and model-hot, at least to the trained eye.

3 or 4 drinks, tops.
 
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