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(The Oatmeal)   How movie theaters SHOULD be laid out. Mountain Dew/popcorn sludge seems strangely appetizing   (theoatmeal.com) divider line 12
    More: Obvious, movie theaters, popcorn  
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9793 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 26 Jun 2012 at 11:34 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2012-06-26 11:28:47 AM
5 votes:
I'll be damned, the headphone jack idea is pretty ingenius.

/Can't wait to upload this to FunnyJunk!
2012-06-27 05:57:41 AM
3 votes:
CSB

My dad is in the forces (nothing fancy just regular) he was away on a tour and was coming back that day. I was so frikkin excited to see my dad after several weeks and couldn't keep calm. My mom sent me to the movies to take my mind off it. She told me she'd call/ text as soon as he was on his way so I could get home to be there. I only lived like a 20 minute walk from the theater.

So I'm sitting in the theater but I'm too excited to see my dad to pay much attention to the movie. I put my phone on silent as I didn't want to bother anyone. I keep checking my phone to see if I've received a message. Just quickly flipping it open and closed again. Everytime I did that something would smack me in the head. Almost like a slingshot was being used. I'd look round, but couldn't see anything. After about the sixth time I had to stop checking my phone as my head was smarting. I missed a text from my mom saying my dad was on his way. He got home and I wasn't there to meet him.

Never did find out who was whacking me in the head. Some guys in movie theaters are real assholes.

/csb
2012-06-26 01:47:07 PM
3 votes:

Bhasayate: A few weeks ago, my wife and went to the movies. This couple and their two kids were talking very loudly -- all of them. I couldn't take it anymore. I turned around and told him to be quite. His wife made a gesture with her finger, put her finger down her throat and acted as if she was making herself puke. He told me "I'm grown." I said "So be quite." He called me an asshole and told me to fark off. I told him more sternly to please be quite. He said "I"m grown!!" Then told me to fark off. I wanted to get up and smack him, but didn't. I hadn't been so angry in a long time. If my wife hadn't have been there, holding my hand and going all "calm down!" things would have escalated. Plus, he's got two little kids with him... sheesh... He kept talking for like 2 minutes or so... very tense. But his wife started telling him to be quite. Then he finally shut up.

I glared on the way out. He wouldn't make eye contact. I said, kind of sarcastically, "thanks for being so quite" or something. His wife laughed. Nervous? I dunno.

Yes, this was the cheapo theater.


That's quiet an interesting story their.
2012-06-26 01:45:00 PM
2 votes:

Bhasayate: A few weeks ago, my wife and went to the movies. This couple and their two kids were talking very loudly -- all of them. I couldn't take it anymore. I turned around and told him to be quite. His wife made a gesture with her finger, put her finger down her throat and acted as if she was making herself puke. He told me "I'm grown." I said "So be quite." He called me an asshole and told me to fark off. I told him more sternly to please be quite. He said "I"m grown!!" Then told me to fark off. I wanted to get up and smack him, but didn't. I hadn't been so angry in a long time. If my wife hadn't have been there, holding my hand and going all "calm down!" things would have escalated. Plus, he's got two little kids with him... sheesh... He kept talking for like 2 minutes or so... very tense. But his wife started telling him to be quite. Then he finally shut up.

I glared on the way out. He wouldn't make eye contact. I said, kind of sarcastically, "thanks for being so quite" or something. His wife laughed. Nervous? I dunno.

Yes, this was the cheapo theater.


Maybe he didn't know what you were talking about?
2012-06-27 06:33:29 AM
1 votes:
I don't care who you are, if you can't hold it for 2 to 3 hours, you shouldn't be going to a damn movie. And you shouldn't be drinking a bathtub of soda in the first 20 minutes of the film either.
2012-06-26 10:07:20 PM
1 votes:
CSS:

Two years ago I was in MI to visit family & friends, and one of my friends brought a small slingshot with him when we went to the movies. It was winter and we could sneak just about any food/candy we wanted into the theater so we didn't need to go to concession. I forgot what we went to watch, but I do remember that my friend used his slingshot with Whoppers and Junior Mints as ammo on people who used their cell phones, either talking or texting with their screen brightness on high.

/He had so many great head-shots, too
//It only took a couple hits for each the people using their phones to get the hint
///One dumbass teen, however, took 6 shots to the head before he stowed his cell
/Yes, it was a trial of endurance not to laugh when the people whipped around
//No, he never got caught
///Yes, it was more entertaining than whatever the fark we went to watch
//SLASHIES//
2012-06-26 03:11:28 PM
1 votes:

Psycoholic_Slag: When I was a kid they had these things called Drive-ins. Some of you punks were probably conceived in one.


No, I wasn't conceived at a Drive-In, but I lost my parents when they went to see "Closed for the Winter"
2012-06-26 01:38:04 PM
1 votes:

Bhasayate: A few weeks ago, my wife and went to the movies. This couple and their two kids were talking very loudly -- all of them. I couldn't take it anymore. I turned around and told him to be quite. His wife made a gesture with her finger, put her finger down her throat and acted as if she was making herself puke. He told me "I'm grown." I said "So be quite." He called me an asshole and told me to fark off. I told him more sternly to please be quite. He said "I"m grown!!" Then told me to fark off. I wanted to get up and smack him, but didn't. I hadn't been so angry in a long time. If my wife hadn't have been there, holding my hand and going all "calm down!" things would have escalated. Plus, he's got two little kids with him... sheesh... He kept talking for like 2 minutes or so... very tense. But his wife started telling him to be quite. Then he finally shut up.

I glared on the way out. He wouldn't make eye contact. I said, kind of sarcastically, "thanks for being so quite" or something. His wife laughed. Nervous? I dunno.

Yes, this was the cheapo theater.


Why did you want him to be quite?
2012-06-26 01:18:00 PM
1 votes:

Mentalpatient87: I must live in a very courteous town, because I never have these problems at any of the five theaters around here. Nobody gabs loudly, nobody brings babies, no texting, phone calls or popcorn fights. It's a rather pleasant experience except for the price.


So how is the rest of life in Pleasantville?
2012-06-26 12:51:06 PM
1 votes:

KellyX: marius2: If a movie breaks the 2 hour mark I usually avoid it until it comes out on VHS.

What's VHS?


It's a larger, bulkier, and inferior version of the Betamax.
2012-06-26 12:36:10 PM
1 votes:

marius2: If a movie breaks the 2 hour mark I usually avoid it until it comes out on VHS.



You're going to be waiting a while then.
2012-06-26 12:32:32 PM
1 votes:
If a movie breaks the 2 hour mark I usually avoid it until it comes out on VHS.
 
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