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(The Indy Channel)   You're a TSA worker and want to continue its legacy of terminal stupidity. Do you a) Open jar of cremated ashes - against policy, b) Test contents with your finger, c) Spill contents on floor, d) All of the above   (theindychannel.com) divider line 289
    More: Dumbass, TSA, x-ray machines, Indianapolis, Sicilian  
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14016 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jun 2012 at 11:41 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-26 12:09:26 PM
FTFA:
"She didn't apologize. She started laughing. I was on my hands and knees picking up bone fragments. I couldn't pick up all, everything that was lost. I mean, there was a long line behind me."

/b/ should be unleashed on that count.
 
2012-06-26 12:09:29 PM

theorangeshield: Baconaise: One more reason to let the airports handle security. TSA agents get away with crap that would get a private sector employee fired in a heartbeat.

The TSA is the reason I'm driving 1000 miles to Orlando next month instead of flying.

You're joking? You would rather drive 1000 miles because you don't want to go through an x-ray machine?

I fly roughly 4 round trips a month and I find this rediculous.


I would.

In fact, I would walk 500 miles, And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 1000 miles To not be felt up like a whore
 
2012-06-26 12:10:53 PM
Both sides are bad when it comes to the TSA, so vote Republican for candidates who either want to do away with it or at least support a major overhaul.
 
2012-06-26 12:11:19 PM

ChipNASA: I think that the TSA is doing an *excellent job" I have no problem with then searching everyone that goes on an aircraft. in fact I don't think that they do enough. The have to deal with the flying public and they're a bunch of smelly, foul, mouth breathers that can't follow *SIMPLE* instructions. Christ, it's only by the grace of God and their hard work and dedication that we haven't had another attack since 9/11. Full-body X-ray scans, pat-downs, strip searches and hell, cavity searches when necessary should be the norm and that goes for everyone....Grandma, even toddlers and young children. I don't care if a male TSA agent has to search your 4 year daughter...just worry about your own damn self and they'll gently take her to another screening area and ensure that she's clean from head to toe and everywhere in between before they return her to you after you're screened. Once grandma has had her saggy boobs probed to ensure she's not concealing contraband, we can all go on our merry way and I can settle down in my seat and enjoy my vodak and ginger ale, secure in the knowledge that our dedicated, hard working, under paid and *CERTAINLY* under-appreciated civil servants are doing everything in their power to make you safe and secure, including the children.
/so there.......suck it haters!!!!
//11/10


images.theknot.com
 
2012-06-26 12:11:21 PM

Bhasayate: hemogoblin: doublesecretprobation: this is obama's america.

vote often, vote republican.

I'm sorry, whose idea was the TSA?

Yeah but Obama and super-duper filibuster proof Majority didn't get rid of it. Or close Gitmo. And even more drone strikes than ever. And he's POTUS now. So why doesn't Obama get rid of TSA? He must like it...


Thank you. Obama's support (and enhancement) of practices that so frightened and upset libs during the Bush Administration remains severely undercovered by our "lib'rul media".
 
2012-06-26 12:12:40 PM

Klivian: ObscureNameHere: Dear America:

When will you put an end to this TSA silliness?

Sincerely,
A Concerned Canadian friend

About two weeks after our hostile takeover of Canada.


That wouldn't help - many of us would just end up moving to another country so it would be the same problem all over again.

/hell if it would have to be hostile, we know we're outgunned
//we also know our oil reserves mean we're one fabricated discovery of WMDs away from being "liberated"
///no need to slash, just promise you'll take Quebec first
 
2012-06-26 12:13:20 PM

rwfan: FTFA:
"She didn't apologize. She started laughing. I was on my hands and knees picking up bone fragments. I couldn't pick up all, everything that was lost. I mean, there was a long line behind me."

/b/ should be unleashed on that count.


IDK, she does appear to have done it for the lulz, /b might be understanding.
though they might be irritated that one of us CAN be as cruel as all of us.
 
2012-06-26 12:13:43 PM
CSB:

I was flying back from my father's funeral, and had to be searched (I had lost my wallet and didn't have ID). They checked me, then checked my stuff. My sister and I had gone through all of my dad's things before we left, and I had picked out three things to take with me- a cassette tape of him singing, an easter card which he had filled out but never got around to sending, and a new ice cream scoop that he had bought. When the agents saw the card and the scoop, they started making fun of them, with me standing right next to them. "Guess someone just HAS to have ice cream whereever they go, huh?" and "A little late for Easter, don't you think?" I was so humiliated and furious. That was about 8 years ago, but because they did it at one of the worst times in my life, it sticks with me still.
 
2012-06-26 12:14:35 PM

ChipNASA: I think that the TSA is doing an *excellent job" I...{heavily redacted} power to make you safe and secure, including the children.
/so there.......suck it haters!!!!
//11/10


Ya think you can get a twofer?
 
2012-06-26 12:15:41 PM
I'm fairly convinced that OIA/MCO has the worst TSA agents in the nation. Seriously. They must find their employment pool from pizza box ads in Bithlo and Pine Hills.
 
2012-06-26 12:15:47 PM

markfara: Bhasayate: hemogoblin: doublesecretprobation: this is obama's america.

vote often, vote republican.

I'm sorry, whose idea was the TSA?

Yeah but Obama and super-duper filibuster proof Majority didn't get rid of it. Or close Gitmo. And even more drone strikes than ever. And he's POTUS now. So why doesn't Obama get rid of TSA? He must like it...

Thank you. Obama's support (and enhancement) of practices that so frightened and upset libs during the Bush Administration remains severely undercovered by our "lib'rul media".


But it's OK when Obama does it I guess
 
2012-06-26 12:16:28 PM
images.wikia.com

Pick up the ashes, citizen.
 
2012-06-26 12:17:31 PM

theorangeshield: Baconaise:The TSA is the reason I'm driving 1000 miles to Orlando next month instead of flying.

You're joking? You would rather drive 1000 miles because you don't want to go through an x-ray machine?


The Orlando TSA douchenuggets are the main reason I'm driving 500 miles each way instead of flying next week, though it's a bit more economical since we'll have 4 people in the car.
 
2012-06-26 12:17:39 PM
Honestly I feel sorry for the TSA agent. She's probably going to have to go get an AIDS test now and think about the sleepless nights she's going to have worring about the DOUCHEBAG who bought this crap through the line.
DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE HEALTH CONCERNS OF THE TSA AGENTS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU THAT WERE EXPOSED TO THIS???? D-BAG?!?!?!?

I think that we should submit a link on Fark and seriously try to get some big $$$ for the TSA agent like the Bus Driver/Monitor. Who know's what HELL she's gone through since this incident. I'd hate to think that I could have been exposed to something that would effect me for the rest of my life....like hepatitis or the plague or herpes or something like that from having to inspect this because this selfish a-hole couldn't just USE THE U.S. GOT DAMN POSTAL SERVICE!!!!

/I'm so angry right now I can barely post.
//round 2
 
2012-06-26 12:18:39 PM

Mikeyworld: Ya think you can get a twofer?


{;-P trying
 
2012-06-26 12:18:56 PM

bborchar: CSB:

I was flying back from my father's funeral, and had to be searched (I had lost my wallet and didn't have ID). They checked me, then checked my stuff. My sister and I had gone through all of my dad's things before we left, and I had picked out three things to take with me- a cassette tape of him singing, an easter card which he had filled out but never got around to sending, and a new ice cream scoop that he had bought. When the agents saw the card and the scoop, they started making fun of them, with me standing right next to them. "Guess someone just HAS to have ice cream whereever they go, huh?" and "A little late for Easter, don't you think?" I was so humiliated and furious. That was about 8 years ago, but because they did it at one of the worst times in my life, it sticks with me still.


They shouldn't have let you fly without ID at all, towel-head.
 
2012-06-26 12:19:06 PM

ChipNASA: Honestly I feel sorry for the TSA agent. She's probably going to have to go get an AIDS test now and think about the sleepless nights she's going to have worring about the DOUCHEBAG who bought this crap through the line.
DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE HEALTH CONCERNS OF THE TSA AGENTS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU THAT WERE EXPOSED TO THIS???? D-BAG?!?!?!?

I think that we should submit a link on Fark and seriously try to get some big $$$ for the TSA agent like the Bus Driver/Monitor. Who know's what HELL she's gone through since this incident. I'd hate to think that I could have been exposed to something that would effect me for the rest of my life....like hepatitis or the plague or herpes or something like that from having to inspect this because this selfish a-hole couldn't just USE THE U.S. GOT DAMN POSTAL SERVICE!!!!

/I'm so angry right now I can barely post.
//round 2


0/10. The slashies and the excessive caps were too much. You have to be a little more subtle.
 
2012-06-26 12:19:19 PM
Sue them into the ground. Or an urn that can be spilled.
 
2012-06-26 12:19:19 PM
Maybe she should have smeared them all over her face and smiled back, giggling.

I think a funnier thing to do would be to grab a spoon and try The Cinnamon Challenge, but with the ashes of his grandfather. It's a new meme!
 
2012-06-26 12:20:36 PM
shinybadge.com

awright sirs, I jess needs to checks inside'yo ASH-JAR...
 
2012-06-26 12:21:47 PM

ChipNASA: lemurs: Worthless security theater strikes again.

It does nothing to keep anyone safer and hassles thousands of passengers daily, but politicians refuse to kill it for fear of being seen as "soft on terror".

YOU'RE WRONG!!!

www.abcnews.com poll

" Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed in an ABC News/Washington Post poll said they supported the Transportation Security Administration"
/standing up for those who can't stand up for themselves.....


Do they give you the sampling data as well?
 
2012-06-26 12:22:01 PM
static.moviefanatic.com

You're just gonna dump them out somewhere anyways, what's the big deal?
 
2012-06-26 12:22:36 PM

ChipNASA: YOU'RE WRONG!!!

www.abcnews.com poll

" Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed in an ABC News/Washington Post poll said they supported the Transportation Security Administration"
/standing up for those who can't stand up for themselves.....


You've gotta be kidding me. But Bruce Schneier says it a lot better than I:

"Look at what succeeded. Because even pre-9/11 security screened for obvious bombs, Abdulmutallab had to construct a far less reliable bomb than he would have otherwise. Instead of using a timer or a plunger or a reliable detonation mechanism, as would any commercial user of PETN, Abdulmutallab had to resort to an ad hoc and much more inefficient detonation mechanism involving a syringe, 20 minutes in the lavatory, and setting his pants on fire. As a result, his actions came to the notice of the other passengers, who subdued him.

Neither the full-body scanners or the enhanced pat-downs are making anyone safer. They're more a result of politicians and government appointees capitulating to a public that demands that "something must be done," even when nothing should be done; and a government bureaucracy that is more concerned about the security of their careers if they fail to secure against the last attack than what happens if they fail anticipate the next one."
 
2012-06-26 12:22:44 PM

Alonjar: I really dont see why an urn would be exempt from screening.


RTFA.
 
2012-06-26 12:23:19 PM

Diogenes: "I want an apology," said Gross. "I want an apology from TSA. I want an apology from the lady who opened the jar and laughed at me. I want them to help me understand where they get off treating people like this."

[www.esarcasm.com image 453x451]

"I've taught them well."


t1.gstatic.com

I get off on treating people like this too.
 
2012-06-26 12:23:19 PM
Want to provide real airplane security?

Go back to the old screening methods, have the airlines put an expanding steel baton and a pair of ziploc handcuffs in each seat pocket on the airplane.

Give us a tool to defend ourselves if anyone is silly enough to try and hijack a plane with a knife again.
 
2012-06-26 12:23:56 PM

MattyFridays: My idea is simple, and I'm going to post it in every TSA thread possible.

Staff TSA with former military coming home who are looking for jobs.


/well trained
//handle orders to the letter
///can spot terrorists


Let's give returning military jobs they needn't be ashamed of, instead.

We don't need a TSA. We don't need to sexually assaulted at the airport. We don't need any of this nonsense, theater or cost.

Last time I flew, TSA took a bottle of water from the poor dude in front of me. Presumably because it could be an explosive. Walked not 4 farking feet from the queue of passengers to toss it in a rubbish bin.

Safe?
 
2012-06-26 12:24:18 PM

diaphoresis: ChipNASA: lemurs: Worthless security theater strikes again.

It does nothing to keep anyone safer and hassles thousands of passengers daily, but politicians refuse to kill it for fear of being seen as "soft on terror".

YOU'RE WRONG!!!

www.abcnews.com poll

" Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed in an ABC News/Washington Post poll said they supported the Transportation Security Administration"
/standing up for those who can't stand up for themselves.....

Do they give you the sampling data as well?


Why are you questioning the media??? You go out and take your own damn time and do a scientific error free poll.
 
2012-06-26 12:25:30 PM

phenn:
Safe?


Not until they give your granny's ashes the UFIA.


FARK THE TSA.

Take your contry back, America.
Pussies.
 
2012-06-26 12:25:37 PM

ChipNASA: Honestly I feel sorry for the TSA agent. She's probably going to have to go get an AIDS test now and think about the sleepless nights she's going to have worring about the DOUCHEBAG who bought this crap through the line.
DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE HEALTH CONCERNS OF THE TSA AGENTS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU THAT WERE EXPOSED TO THIS???? D-BAG?!?!?!?

I think that we should submit a link on Fark and seriously try to get some big $$$ for the TSA agent like the Bus Driver/Monitor. Who know's what HELL she's gone through since this incident. I'd hate to think that I could have been exposed to something that would effect me for the rest of my life....like hepatitis or the plague or herpes or something like that from having to inspect this because this selfish a-hole couldn't just USE THE U.S. GOT DAMN POSTAL SERVICE!!!!

/I'm so angry right now I can barely post.
//round 2



Dude, you're trolling WAY too hard. Relax, go outside.
 
2012-06-26 12:26:06 PM

Baconaise: The TSA is the reason I'm driving 1000 miles to Orlando next month instead of flying.


Only a matter of time before they are searching your car, so don't get too comfy.
 
2012-06-26 12:26:07 PM
This is just... wow.

This woman should be beaten with a sock full of oranges until she craps herself.
 
2012-06-26 12:26:35 PM
Take all the time and effort put into the BS sex offender registries and create a TSA employee registry. Make it publicly searchable too.
 
2012-06-26 12:27:04 PM

vudukungfu:

Take your contry back, America.
Pussies.


Pretty much.
 
2012-06-26 12:27:10 PM

ChipNASA: I think that the TSA is doing an *excellent job" I have no problem with then searching everyone that goes on an aircraft. in fact I don't think that they do enough. The have to deal with the flying public and they're a bunch of smelly, foul, mouth breathers that can't follow *SIMPLE* instructions. Christ, it's only by the grace of God and their hard work and dedication that we haven't had another attack since 9/11. Full-body X-ray scans, pat-downs, strip searches and hell, cavity searches when necessary should be the norm and that goes for everyone....Grandma, even toddlers and young children. I don't care if a male TSA agent has to search your 4 year daughter...just worry about your own damn self and they'll gently take her to another screening area and ensure that she's clean from head to toe and everywhere in between before they return her to you after you're screened. Once grandma has had her saggy boobs probed to ensure she's not concealing contraband, we can all go on our merry way and I can settle down in my seat and enjoy my vodak and ginger ale, secure in the knowledge that our dedicated, hard working, under paid and *CERTAINLY* under-appreciated civil servants are doing everything in their power to make you safe and secure, including the children.
/so there.......suck it haters!!!!
//11/10


9.5/10. Had to dock you a half point for punctuation...
 
2012-06-26 12:27:46 PM

phenn: . We don't need to sexually assaulted at the airport.


aw :( Can we maybe keep one special line for those of us that enjoy that kind of thing?
 
2012-06-26 12:28:04 PM
It's a fairly common policy with airlines that anyone transporting ashes (human remains) via carry-on has to carry a copy of the death certificate and cremation certificate with them. Since all we've heard is the victim's testimony then there's a good chance the dude didn't have either, which prompted TSA to take the container into their possession though.

The TSA bimbo obviously didn't understand her own company's policy though and opened it like a farking retard, which is borderline illegal, since human remains are classified as dangerous goods as per IATA.

I guess I really don't have a point to make though. Derp.
 
2012-06-26 12:28:15 PM

LessO2: ChipNASA: Honestly I feel sorry for the TSA agent. She's probably going to have to go get an AIDS test now and think about the sleepless nights she's going to have worring about the DOUCHEBAG who bought this crap through the line.
DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE HEALTH CONCERNS OF THE TSA AGENTS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU THAT WERE EXPOSED TO THIS???? D-BAG?!?!?!?

I think that we should submit a link on Fark and seriously try to get some big $$$ for the TSA agent like the Bus Driver/Monitor. Who know's what HELL she's gone through since this incident. I'd hate to think that I could have been exposed to something that would effect me for the rest of my life....like hepatitis or the plague or herpes or something like that from having to inspect this because this selfish a-hole couldn't just USE THE U.S. GOT DAMN POSTAL SERVICE!!!!

/I'm so angry right now I can barely post.
//round 2


Dude, you're trolling WAY too hard. Relax, go outside.


/I'm busy eating lunch....and you apparently didn't see the Jenny McCarthy thread.
 
2012-06-26 12:28:29 PM

ChipNASA: Honestly I feel sorry for the TSA agent. She's probably going to have to go get an AIDS test now and think about the sleepless nights she's going to have worring about the DOUCHEBAG who bought this crap through the line.
DID YOU EVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE HEALTH CONCERNS OF THE TSA AGENTS AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU THAT WERE EXPOSED TO THIS???? D-BAG?!?!?!?

I think that we should submit a link on Fark and seriously try to get some big $$$ for the TSA agent like the Bus Driver/Monitor. Who know's what HELL she's gone through since this incident. I'd hate to think that I could have been exposed to something that would effect me for the rest of my life....like hepatitis or the plague or herpes or something like that from having to inspect this because this selfish a-hole couldn't just USE THE U.S. GOT DAMN POSTAL SERVICE!!!!

/I'm so angry right now I can barely post.
//round 2


If you're that angry, perhaps you should follow a bit of wisdom:

Better to be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

When you speak in anger, you lose the ability to intelligently converse. I'm sorry sweetie but you are being your own worst enemy right now. Take an hour to relax and compose yourself.

/Hugz
 
2012-06-26 12:29:16 PM

Sticky Hands: phenn: . We don't need to sexually assaulted at the airport.

aw :( Can we maybe keep one special line for those of us that enjoy that kind of thing?



IMHO....and I realize I'm in the minority:

I don't care if I'm groped......I just HATE waiting in long lines.
 
2012-06-26 12:29:55 PM
I'm not a naturally violent person, but if that had happened to me, the job of collecting the ashes off the floor would have been complicated by the fact that half of her teeth would have joined them in very short order.

And no jury on the planet would convict me.
 
2012-06-26 12:30:14 PM

The_Sponge: Sticky Hands: phenn: . We don't need to sexually assaulted at the airport.

aw :( Can we maybe keep one special line for those of us that enjoy that kind of thing?


IMHO....and I realize I'm in the minority:

I don't care if I'm groped......I just HATE waiting in long lines.


Really? May I ask where you put your foot down on such treatment?
 
2012-06-26 12:30:14 PM

The_Sponge: Sticky Hands: phenn: . We don't need to sexually assaulted at the airport.

aw :( Can we maybe keep one special line for those of us that enjoy that kind of thing?


IMHO....and I realize I'm in the minority:

I don't care if I'm groped......I just HATE waiting in long lines.


Those long lines that act as a checkpoint for the entire airport? I mean if the terrorists simply attacked the checkpoint they'd generate more casualties and impact than taking down a plane...
 
2012-06-26 12:30:24 PM

The_Sponge: Yes, I'm an asshole for flying to Vegas this weekend instead of driving....never mind the fact that it's about 1,800 miles round trip.


I thought I would be the only one going to Vegas this weekend. They said it's off-season. Damn.
 
2012-06-26 12:30:57 PM

ChipNASA: diaphoresis: ChipNASA: lemurs: Worthless security theater strikes again.

It does nothing to keep anyone safer and hassles thousands of passengers daily, but politicians refuse to kill it for fear of being seen as "soft on terror".

YOU'RE WRONG!!!

www.abcnews.com poll

" Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed in an ABC News/Washington Post poll said they supported the Transportation Security Administration"
/standing up for those who can't stand up for themselves.....

Do they give you the sampling data as well?

Why are you questioning the media??? You go out and take your own damn time and do a scientific error free poll.


Tsk Tsk... Temper Temper....
 
2012-06-26 12:32:16 PM

Mentalenemasquad: 9.5/10. Had to dock you a half point for punctuation...


www.evilmilk.com
 
2012-06-26 12:32:49 PM

Marcus Aurelius: If all you assholes would just stop going to the airport until the TSA is disbanded then we wouldn't have this problem.


THIS! I refuse to fly for personal travel anymore. Also, I travel by car for business travel if they allow it. Our travel policy has a certain mileage range that you must take a car, a certain mileage range that it's your call which you want to do, and a mileage range that requires a plane. During the last several years, partly because of additional hours spent in the airport at the hands of TSA goons, those distances have continued to creep up. We're to the point now that an 8 hour drive is the cutoff point between having your choice and taking the plane. It was 5 hours just 3 years ago.

We used to have the option from Madison to Chicago, now it's car only.
We used to have mandatory plane to the Twin Cities, now it's an option.
Madison to Bloomington? Used to be plane, now choice.
Madison to Kansas City? Used to be plane, now choice.
Madison to Louisville? Used to be plane, now choice.
Everyone takes a car when they have the option.

F*ck the TSA.
 
2012-06-26 12:33:30 PM

freewill: This is just... wow.

This woman should be beaten with a sock full of oranges until she craps herself.


Sweet, sweet Sicilian oranges, obviously.
 
2012-06-26 12:33:53 PM
www.newsrealblog.com
 
2012-06-26 12:34:18 PM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: I'm not a naturally violent person, but if that had happened to me, the job of collecting the ashes off the floor would have been complicated by the fact that half of her teeth would have joined them in very short order.

And no jury on the planet would convict me.


I would have nullified that jury...
 
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