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(AP)   Studies show scientists now smart enough to determine that animals are smarter than we are   (hosted.ap.org) divider line 65
    More: Cool, animals, Bonobos, baboons, orangutans, multiplication, scientific research, apes, neurosciences  
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2942 clicks; posted to Geek » on 24 Jun 2012 at 11:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-24 07:34:51 PM
Dolphins especially... they get us humans to feed them fish so they don't have to go catch them. BRILLIANT!
 
2012-06-24 07:44:10 PM
Cats groomed us so we'd invent the internet and post goofy pictures of them. Well, and feed and pat them.
 
2012-06-24 07:46:00 PM

Slartibartfast: [talking about the Earth] "Best laid plans of mice. "


Arthur: "And men. "


Slartibartfast: "What? "


Arthur: "Best laid plans of mice and men."


Slartibartfast: "Oh. No, I don't think men had much to do with it. "

 
2012-06-24 08:43:42 PM
As an animal, I fully agree: I am smarter than all of you submitters out there. Thanks for clearing that up, scientists.
 
2012-06-24 09:59:12 PM
The more we study animals, the less special we seem.

Or in other words "Scientists are ego-maniacal twats who don't listen to people." Seriously, the fact it's 2012 and this experiment isn't 100 years old is almost as rife with hubris as the twats who come over to Asia and "discover" local species.

I'm glad the scientists TODAY have some common sense and are finally laying good groundwork for the future to catch up the past. But I'm doubling down on hate for people who think animals are just squishy robots.
 
2012-06-24 10:02:27 PM

Majick Thise: Dolphins especially... they get us humans to feed them fish so they don't have to go catch them. BRILLIANT!


The Onion had it right.

Once dolphins get opposable thumbs, we are *so* doomed.
 
2012-06-24 10:28:36 PM

skinink: Slartibartfast: [talking about the Earth] "Best laid plans of mice. "
Arthur: "And men. "
Slartibartfast: "What? "
Arthur: "Best laid plans of mice and men."
Slartibartfast: "Oh. No, I don't think men had much to do with it. "


Nice : )
 
2012-06-24 10:42:06 PM
I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.
 
2012-06-24 10:46:33 PM

born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.


"self-awareness" isn't exactly an incredibly high bar. There's a difference between having self-awareness and having the abillity to reason.
 
2012-06-24 10:46:55 PM

born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.



It's something we've acknowledged forever. At least since Buddhism was born, but probably for a LOT longer than that.
 
2012-06-24 11:20:09 PM
Damm straight. My two Shih Tzu's have been harassing me for treats all night and succeeding brilliantly.

/can't resist the passionate stares...
 
2012-06-24 11:23:39 PM

doglover: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.


It's something we've acknowledged forever. At least since Buddhism was born, but probably for a LOT longer than that.


cache.boston.com
 
2012-06-24 11:27:00 PM
I think in a lot of ways animals know more than we do. Not many animals died in the tsunami a few years back*, they all fled for higher ground

*Unless you count fish, but I don't think they really had a choice in the matter
 
2012-06-24 11:31:03 PM

Majick Thise: Dolphins especially... they get us humans to feed them fish so they don't have to go catch them. BRILLIANT!




Not so special. Many humans on welfare do the same thing.
 
2012-06-24 11:31:36 PM
Someone in here say something about asian twats?
 
2012-06-24 11:33:30 PM

Dr J Zoidberg: I think in a lot of ways animals know more than we do. Not many animals died in the tsunami a few years back*, they all fled for higher ground

*Unless you count fish, but I don't think they really had a choice in the matter




Also not so special. Many humans choose not to live near the edge of land, on fault lines, where giant friggin' waves can kill them.
 
2012-06-24 11:35:28 PM
 
2012-06-24 11:45:50 PM

RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 399x140]

Pit yourself against the Japanese chimp Ayumu in a memory test


holy crap.I couldn't get past 2. Then I watched Ayumu. Good lord. That's incredible.
 
2012-06-24 11:48:18 PM

RoyBatty:
i.imgur.com

Pit yourself against the Japanese chimp Ayumu in a memory test


Last time I saw a chimp smiling like that there was a very unhappy frog involved.

www.blogcdn.com
 
2012-06-24 11:54:12 PM
I got three correct.

TAKE THAT!
 
2012-06-24 11:54:40 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Majick Thise: Dolphins especially... they get us humans to feed them fish so they don't have to go catch them. BRILLIANT!

The Onion had it right.

Once dolphins get opposable thumbs, we are *so* doomed.


They could also use that extra processing layer in humans that is missing in their impressive-looking cortex.
 
2012-06-25 12:09:15 AM
Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.
 
2012-06-25 12:12:30 AM

King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.


Nor do they screw each other over for a percentage.
 
2012-06-25 12:15:38 AM

King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.


Dolphins will fark anything that moves and some things that don't.

If you gave me the choice between hangin' out at the beach all day farkin' and goofin' around under the sea or just about anything humans do, I'd have to agree with dolphins.

Maybe the reason humans are the only animals to colonize the whole world and kill everything else is because all the other animals are happy as is.
 
2012-06-25 12:32:11 AM

King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.


Cats will kill other cats, though.
 
2012-06-25 12:32:48 AM

doglover: Maybe the reason humans are the only animals to colonize the whole world and kill everything else is because all the other animals are happy as is.


Rats, house sparrows, rock dove, European Starlings...to name a few.
 
2012-06-25 12:52:35 AM
I'm mad, that's a fact. I found out animals don't help. Animals think they're pretty smart. shiat on the ground. See in the dark. Wander around like a crazy dog, make a mistake in the parking lot. Always bumping into things. Always let you down.

Animals think they understand. Trust in them? A big mistake. Animals want to change my life. I will ignore animal's advice.

They're never there when you need them. They're never there when you call them.

I know the animals laughing at us don't even know what a joke is. I won't follow animal's advice. And I don't care if they're laughing at us.

They say they don't need money; they're living on nuts and berries.

They like to laugh at people. they're setting a bad example. they think they know what's best.

Go ahead. Laugh at me.
 
2012-06-25 12:55:34 AM
Anyway. Apes have a birth rate that skews male, but the adult population skews female.

Why? Adolescent male apes form teams and beat the shiat out of each other.
 
2012-06-25 12:55:44 AM

Dwight_Yeast: King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.

Cats will kill other cats, though.


And dolphins too.
Killer dolphins baffle marine experts
/well, cats probably don't kill many dolphin
 
2012-06-25 01:08:55 AM

RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 399x140]

Pit yourself against the Japanese chimp Ayumu in a memory test


That just proves that chimp is more sober than me! That's all!
 
2012-06-25 01:09:54 AM

King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.



Animals don't fight wars. They don't use nuclear arms. You can't hug your children with nuclear arms!
 
2012-06-25 01:22:35 AM
My conure is way too smart. He thinks in a way that is totally alien to me. Avian intelligence is so different than mammalian intelligence.
 
2012-06-25 01:23:26 AM

RoyBatty: Someone in here say something about asian twats?


Somebody's trying to turn this conversation sideways.

/NTTAWWT.
 
2012-06-25 01:33:55 AM

King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.


They also don't try to hug their children with nuclear arms...
 
2012-06-25 01:34:04 AM
Bands of chimps have been known to make rudimentary spears and go to war against other chimps
 
2012-06-25 01:35:20 AM

halB: King Something: Cats and dolphins don't kill members of their own species for sport.


Animals don't fight wars. They don't use nuclear arms. You can't hug your children with nuclear arms!


Damn it...
 
2012-06-25 01:35:23 AM

Ambivalence: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.

"self-awareness" isn't exactly an incredibly high bar. There's a difference between having self-awareness and having the abillity to reason.


There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.
 
2012-06-25 01:42:35 AM
Ever seen those videos of orca playing catch with a seal before they eat it?

they don't call 'em killer whales strictly because they are awesome.
 
2012-06-25 02:07:23 AM

Rockstone: Ambivalence: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.

"self-awareness" isn't exactly an incredibly high bar. There's a difference between having self-awareness and having the abillity to reason.

There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.


People, I give you the problem with humanity.
 
2012-06-25 02:17:17 AM

doglover: Rockstone: Ambivalence: born_yesterday:


www.koreaittimes.com
People, I give you the problem with humanity.

 
2012-06-25 02:22:56 AM

doglover: Rockstone: Ambivalence: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.

"self-awareness" isn't exactly an incredibly high bar. There's a difference between having self-awareness and having the abillity to reason.

There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.

People, I give you the problem with humanity.


Lemme guess, we're human?

/prefers Peacekeepers
 
2012-06-25 02:31:07 AM

Rockstone: There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.


Bottlenose Dolphins are clearly sentient, but they seem to be having a small issue with controlling fire.
 
2012-06-25 02:33:39 AM

Harry_Seldon: Rockstone: There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.

Bottlenose Dolphins are clearly sentient, but they seem to be having a small issue with controlling fire.


They instead focused on raping anything that moves, or doesn't.
 
2012-06-25 02:39:31 AM

doglover: Rockstone: Ambivalence: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.

"self-awareness" isn't exactly an incredibly high bar. There's a difference between having self-awareness and having the abillity to reason.

There's a difference between even those two concerns and sentience. We're the only species that is truly sentient. Also, we're the only ones that have tamed fire and electricity.
Until a chimp can create an network superior to the internet, color me not impressed.

People, I give you the problem with humanity.


lh4.googleusercontent.com
 
2012-06-25 02:56:10 AM

Rockstone: We're the only species that is truly sentient.


What exactly do you mean by "truly sentient"?
 
2012-06-25 03:14:49 AM
Wait, we keep our bombs hidden in haystacks?

I thought we was smarterer than that.
 
2012-06-25 05:44:53 AM
The evidence that animals are more intelligent and more social than we thought seems to grow each year, especially when it comes to primates.

The media's continual failure to realize that humans are both primates and animals never ceases to amuse, by which I mean that I now consider a journalism degree pretty much proof positive that the recipient is stupid beyond any hope of redemption.

doglover: born_yesterday: I'm not sure the confirmation of self-awareness in other "lower" species is something our species is altogether ready or willing to acknowledge.

It's something we've acknowledged forever. At least since Buddhism was born, but probably for a LOT longer than that.


It was pretty much the default assumption of primitive (i.e. pre-literate) and animist religions for most of history, yeah. And modern biology long ago figured out in the general sense that we're not a particularly radical departure from the nearer branches of our family tree (the great apes, the primates, even mammals in general), there's nothing in us that's completely without precedent. Data of the type talked about in the article is just specifics.

Though, as the other guy mentioned, "self-awareness" is kind of a low bar when you're talking in terms of comparability to humanity. For instance, your computer's operating system is self-aware, as are most cars built after 2000. But I'm unlikely to feel the same guilt from a reformat or a firmware update that I would from a murder.
 
2012-06-25 06:22:16 AM

mamoru: Rockstone: We're the only species that is truly sentient.

What exactly do you mean by "truly sentient"?


I think he means sentient by the standards created by men trying to prove we were 'gods special creatures' and created the standards so that only humans could ever pass.


The older I get the more it's becoming apparent that the only thing that separates us from the animals is our arrogance.
 
2012-06-25 06:52:48 AM

Majick Thise: mamoru: Rockstone: We're the only species that is truly sentient.

What exactly do you mean by "truly sentient"?

I think he means sentient by the standards created by men trying to prove we were 'gods special creatures' and created the standards so that only humans could ever pass.


The older I get the more it's becoming apparent that the only thing that separates us from the animals is our arrogance.


As they say in my country, the only thing that separates us from the animals are mindless superstition and pointless ritual.
 
2012-06-25 07:25:22 AM

Jim_Callahan: But I'm unlikely to feel the same guilt from a reformat or a firmware update that I would from a murder.


Your firmware updates kill you machines?

Dude, are you a cartoon character or something. HOW!?
 
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