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(Bitten and Bound)   Jessica Simpson tweeted her first Weight Watchers progress shot. We're not sure if it was a before or after image.... bad camera angle. #00 w/pic   (bittenandbound.com) divider line 74
    More: Obvious, Weight Watchers, Jessica Simpson, camera angles, scientific progress  
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16772 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Jun 2012 at 5:48 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-24 04:22:52 PM
She's still trying to master the whole "breathe in, breathe out" thing, I see.
 
2012-06-24 04:34:43 PM
I can't wait until sunglasses twice the size of your entire head go out of style.
 
2012-06-24 04:58:12 PM
Mooooooooooo.
 
2012-06-24 05:40:45 PM
Is that her chest or a river map?
 
2012-06-24 05:50:42 PM
I'd motorboat it.
 
2012-06-24 05:56:00 PM
dem titties
 
2012-06-24 05:56:39 PM
www.hitwallpapers.com
 
2012-06-24 06:03:33 PM
Is that her chest or a river map?

big boobs do that, especially after you have had a baby or are nursing, more hormones, you kinda cant help it, my man def takes a few veins over small boobies any day.
 
2012-06-24 06:08:05 PM
She may be dumb as a post, but damn that woman was an unattainable level of hot back in the day. She had a short shelf life, it seems, but it doesn't take away from the Daisy Duke wannabe years.

I wouldn't have actually ever had a chance with her, and even if I did I have a wife that I love and strict rule about only having a relationship (friendly or otherwise) with people with IQs over room temp. But damn, the fantasies I entertained damn near broke my brain.

/don't usually go for the blonde/Barbie type, but dat ass back then...
 
2012-06-24 06:08:35 PM
"Maxwell amazes Eric and I"

Chicken of the Sea is tuna, you dumb, fat-titted biatch.
 
2012-06-24 06:13:27 PM

Shadowknight: She may be dumb as a post, but damn that woman was an unattainable level of hot back in the day. She had a short shelf life, it seems, but it doesn't take away from the Daisy Duke wannabe years.

I wouldn't have actually ever had a chance with her, and even if I did I have a wife that I love and strict rule about only having a relationship (friendly or otherwise) with people with IQs over room temp. But damn, the fantasies I entertained damn near broke my brain.

/don't usually go for the blonde/Barbie type, but dat ass back then...


dat ass? dem titties.

She was a 20-something's dream...super hot, great little bod, big jugs and was a complete 'tard, so you could just spew verbal shiat at her and she'd believe it for your amusement.

You're right about her shelf life.
 
2012-06-24 06:14:23 PM
Damn those rigs hit maximum density. Her nipples must be the size of hubcaps.
 
2012-06-24 06:19:56 PM
WANT.

She was hot as fark ten years ago, she's hot as fark now.

And that rack, that lovely rack...
 
2012-06-24 06:23:42 PM

The Shatner Incident: I'd motorboat it.


Fark yeah. And I wouldn't stop there.
 
2012-06-24 06:24:40 PM

TravisBickle62: Did her dad take the photo?


Zing!
 
2012-06-24 06:30:07 PM

TravisBickle62: Did her dad take the photo?


I wouldn't doubt it. I also wouldn't doubt it if she's nursing him.
 
2012-06-24 06:36:51 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: She's still trying to master the whole "breathe in, breathe out" thing, I see.


biatch shut the fark up
 
2012-06-24 06:49:48 PM
Big and natural. Plus even though she's gained a lot of weight she's still pretty.
 
2012-06-24 06:56:26 PM
Dear Ms. Simpson,

If you would like your second baby to be blond hair, blue eyes, very tall and insane then I'm your Daddy. Please reply with details.

Sincerely,

KrispyKritter

PS: Willing to 'do it' twice if you want twins
 
2012-06-24 06:57:02 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: She's still trying to master the whole "breathe in, breathe out" thing, I see.


I prefer to think of it as "Blowjob face".
 
2012-06-24 07:00:57 PM
Works for me

bel4sucks: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: She's still trying to master the whole "breathe in, breathe out" thing, I see.

biatch shut the fark up


fusillade762: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: She's still trying to master the whole "breathe in, breathe out" thing, I see.

I prefer to think of it as "Blowjob face".


Works for me.
 
2012-06-24 07:15:42 PM

FinFangFark: Shadowknight: She may be dumb as a post, but damn that woman was an unattainable level of hot back in the day. She had a short shelf life, it seems, but it doesn't take away from the Daisy Duke wannabe years.

I wouldn't have actually ever had a chance with her, and even if I did I have a wife that I love and strict rule about only having a relationship (friendly or otherwise) with people with IQs over room temp. But damn, the fantasies I entertained damn near broke my brain.

/don't usually go for the blonde/Barbie type, but dat ass back then...

dat ass? dem titties.

She was a 20-something's dream...super hot, great little bod, big jugs and was a complete 'tard, so you could just spew verbal shiat at her and she'd believe it for your amusement.

You're right about her shelf life.


Personally, I'm an ass and leg man. And yes, dat ass. I'd roll around in that ass for HOURS.

i46.tinypic.com
 
2012-06-24 07:24:41 PM
Nice milk cartons.
 
2012-06-24 07:31:07 PM
Meh, I like the view.

Agree about the shades though.
 
2012-06-24 07:39:57 PM

FinFangFark: dat ass? dem titties.

She was a 20-something's dream...super hot, great little bod, big jugs and was a complete 'tard, so you could just spew verbal shiat at her and she'd believe it for your amusement.

You're right about her shelf life.



This. In the Dukes of Hazzard movie she was almost unbelievably hot: long blonde hair, pouty BJ lips, tanned, toned, incredible rack, and an ass you could bounce a quarter off of. It's too bad she only looked that way for a short while.
 
2012-06-24 08:21:53 PM

fusillade762: I prefer to think of it as "Blowjob face".


John Buck 41: Works for me.


It's more amusing to think of it as "trying to figure out where the glowing dayball is going" face.


bel4sucks: biatch shut the fark up


Pump the brakes, Turbo. I'm just clownin'.
 
2012-06-24 08:26:19 PM
Yuck
 
2012-06-24 08:42:15 PM
Another example of a hot chick that should never have been allowed to have a kid. All hot chicks should be required to have surogates carry their kids so that they forever remain hot chicks.

Totally serious.
 
2012-06-24 08:44:10 PM
silverliningopticians.com
 
2012-06-24 09:09:10 PM

Oh_Enough_Already: [ll-media.tmz.com image 480x690]

Not the whole story.


Get the harpoon!

/would still hit it, after aspect ratio was fixed of course
 
2012-06-24 09:18:58 PM
From the looks of her, I'd guess that she is in the throes of post-natal hormonal mayhem. She might have given herself a little time to recover from pregnancy and childbirth before jumping into a high-stakes weight-loss contest.
 
2012-06-24 09:26:54 PM
FTA... 40 lbs gained.

Bull shiat.

Be honest, it was closer to 70. That said I think she is hot as hell.
 
2012-06-24 09:48:38 PM

jmr61: Another example of a hot chick that should never have been allowed to have a kid. All hot chicks should be required to have surogates carry their kids so that they forever remain hot chicks.

Totally serious.


Hot chicks beget future hot chicks. If you prevent hot chicks from reproducing, women will become uglier and uglier with each passing generation. Eventually, due to a lack of hot chicks, men will lose interest in sex. Then the human race will die.
 
2012-06-24 10:37:11 PM
So she likes eating, so do I. Of all of the recent young starlet types she seems the most drama-free. She's fine.
 
2012-06-24 10:48:31 PM
She must really love cheeseburgers.
 
2012-06-24 10:51:47 PM
If I have to choose between underweight or overweight, I'll take over anytime. Nothing worse than shagging a bag of bones
 
2012-06-24 10:54:21 PM

Mega Steve: If I have to choose between underweight or overweight, I'll take over anytime. Nothing worse than shagging a bag of bones


With one 'r,' I can make it worse.
 
2012-06-24 11:18:39 PM

Relatively Obscure: Mega Steve: If I have to choose between underweight or overweight, I'll take over anytime. Nothing worse than shagging a bag of bones

With one 'r,' I can make it worse.


Great, now i have popcorn lodged in my nose. Asshole.
 
2012-06-24 11:57:36 PM

jmr61: Another example of a hot chick that should never have been allowed to have a kid. All hot chicks should be required to have surogates carry their kids so that they forever remain hot chicks.

Totally serious.


Cindy Crawford, Elle and Heidi Klum might disagree with you
 
2012-06-25 12:23:22 AM
I totally would. Even right now. Just to say I did.
 
2012-06-25 12:40:15 AM

italie: I totally would. Even right now. Just to say I did.


I would totally, too. Except I would tell people it was in 2004.
 
2012-06-25 01:15:48 AM
www.pearlsonly.com
 
2012-06-25 01:36:00 AM

Relatively Obscure: I can't wait until sunglasses twice the size of your entire head go out of style.


2.bp.blogspot.com

Sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
 
2012-06-25 02:00:06 AM
God speed, big-booby girl. God speed.
 
2012-06-25 03:55:31 AM

Cyno01: Relatively Obscure: I can't wait until sunglasses twice the size of your entire head go out of style.



Sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.


I think I just hurt myself laughing.
 
2012-06-25 03:57:15 AM
FTA Jess recently tweeted, "I absolutely LOVE my family! Maxwell amazes Eric and I everyday with every little thing she does!"

Translation: Her diaper dookie is like a smelly Jackson Pollock and her giant head reminds me of Nick Lachey's elephant penis.
 
2012-06-25 04:20:43 AM

Atomic Spunk: jmr61: Another example of a hot chick that should never have been allowed to have a kid. All hot chicks should be required to have surogates carry their kids so that they forever remain hot chicks.

Totally serious.

Hot chicks beget future hot chicks. If you prevent hot chicks from reproducing, women will become uglier and uglier with each passing generation. Eventually, due to a lack of hot chicks, men will lose interest in sex. Then the human race will die.


Biology Fail. Surrogates don't effect the DNA of the child they're carrying.
 
2012-06-25 06:57:42 AM
CSL
 
2012-06-25 07:20:20 AM
Wow, who would have guessed that weight gain in women would lead to larger breasts? I for one am shocked.
 
2012-06-25 08:25:57 AM

Repo Man: Wow, she brought out the chubby chasers.

[i46.tinypic.com image 635x562]


That's well beyond extra weight gain from pregnancy. That's obese. The perils of fame are that you're the subject of constant mockery and ridicule. Every woman that felt inferior at the mere sight of her and every man that felt far beneath her standards gets to indulge in vengeful schadenfreude with every jiggle of her bulbous gut.
 
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