If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(USA Today)   Old and busted: computer dating. New Hotness: Pheromone parties, where you smell shirts that others have slept in, to find your future mate   (usatoday.com) divider line 104
    More: Strange, index card, inbreeding, Konstantin Bakhurin, odors  
•       •       •

5505 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jun 2012 at 3:18 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



104 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-24 01:31:11 AM
Old news, so exciting...
 
2012-06-24 02:21:25 AM
Gross.
 
2012-06-24 02:50:19 AM
Whenever I see a girl I'd like to meet, I introduce myself, and present her with my dirty underwear, usually in a heart shaped box.
Right there on the street.
It's more romantic that way.

Why no, I'm not married.
Why do you ask?
 
2012-06-24 03:21:57 AM
Anyone else read that as "pheromone panties"?

/sniiiiffffffff
 
2012-06-24 03:23:23 AM
What if I don't wear a shirt to bed?

(You're welcome for that mental image.)
 
2012-06-24 03:23:32 AM
hehe, i like it. we are such animals
 
2012-06-24 03:24:19 AM

TommyymmoT: Whenever I see a girl I'd like to meet, I introduce myself, and present her with my dirty underwear, usually in a heart shaped box.
Right there on the street.
It's more romantic that way.

Why no, I'm not married.
Why do you ask?


I simply ask them if they want to smell my sheets.

It's just as effective.
 
2012-06-24 03:25:49 AM
My pits smell awesome.
 
2012-06-24 03:26:02 AM

jtown: What if I don't wear a shirt to bed?

(You're welcome for that mental image.)


i184.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-24 03:27:53 AM

Molavian: jtown: What if I don't wear a shirt to bed?

(You're welcome for that mental image.)

[i184.photobucket.com image 445x345]


No way, man! I'm not bald.
 
2012-06-24 03:29:41 AM
I just fart in their general direction. If they can't handle that, I'm not going to waste any more time on them. Yes I am single, why do you ask?
 
2012-06-24 03:32:13 AM

jtown: Molavian: jtown: What if I don't wear a shirt to bed?

(You're welcome for that mental image.)

[i184.photobucket.com image 445x345]

No way, man! I'm not bald.


i184.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-24 03:33:37 AM
That is not even remotely how pheremones work, but fine, whatever. If the kind of idiots that think this has even the remotest basis in science are busy sniffing each others' undershirts that at least slightly lowers the percentage of my dating pool that believes religiously in demonstrably false pseudoscientific bullshiat.

So thanks for statistically improving my quality of life slightly, random moron who failed high school biology.
 
2012-06-24 03:44:05 AM

Jim_Callahan: That is not even remotely how pheremones work, but fine, whatever. If the kind of idiots that think this has even the remotest basis in science are busy sniffing each others' undershirts that at least slightly lowers the percentage of my dating pool that believes religiously in demonstrably false pseudoscientific bullshiat.


I take it for you dating isn't much of any issue anyway, is it?
 
2012-06-24 03:44:48 AM

Jim_Callahan: That is not even remotely how pheremones work, but fine, whatever. If the kind of idiots that think this has even the remotest basis in science are busy sniffing each others' undershirts that at least slightly lowers the percentage of my dating pool that believes religiously in demonstrably false pseudoscientific bullshiat.

So thanks for statistically improving my quality of life slightly, random moron who failed high school biology.


Yeah. Well. Whatever.

Can't explain it, certain very special people have a scent that renders me a visceral and atavistic reaction. It rocks.
 
2012-06-24 03:48:50 AM

HotWingAgenda: Anyone else read that as "pheromone panties"?

/sniiiiffffffff


That's the Japanese version.
 
2012-06-24 03:50:41 AM
www.lilith-ezine.com
 
2012-06-24 03:53:47 AM

JustinCase:
Can't explain it, certain very special people have a scent that renders me a visceral and atavistic reaction. It rocks.


The pheremones prime your body for susceptibility to pair-bonding and so on, exposing yourself to them from a source other than the person producing them isn't going to actually do anything unless you are also getting them from the person at the same time, in which case the smelly pajamas are redundant.

The reaction's also not conscious, your conscious opinion of someone's smell is generally mostly informed by culture, not biology. So there's that too.

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: I take it for you dating isn't much of any issue anyway, is it?


Not with women that believe in things like this, alien abduction, curing cancer with magnets, and so on, no. So I have that going for me at least.
 
2012-06-24 04:14:45 AM
Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.
 
2012-06-24 04:16:18 AM

Jim_Callahan: The pheremones prime your body for susceptibility to pair-bonding and so on, exposing yourself to them from a source other than the person producing them isn't going to actually do anything unless you are also getting them from the person at the same time....


Holy crap, you sound as flaky as the people you're mocking.
 
2012-06-24 04:21:49 AM
Excuse me miss, can I smell your pussy?

HELL NO, YOU CAN'T SMELL MY PUSSY!

Oh... it must be your feet then.
 
2012-06-24 04:28:27 AM
as a joke you could submit multiple bags each with special smell 'surprises' on the shirts.

Hey, it could work if you are into scat, right?
 
2012-06-24 04:31:09 AM

miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.


So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?
 
2012-06-24 04:37:47 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?


Maybe just use it for sexy time?
 
2012-06-24 04:39:33 AM

Warrener: TommyymmoT: Whenever I see a girl I'd like to meet, I introduce myself, and present her with my dirty underwear, usually in a heart shaped box.
Right there on the street.
It's more romantic that way.

Why no, I'm not married.
Why do you ask?

I simply ask them if they want to smell my sheets.

It's just as effective.


I get them to smell my undershirt, it's doused in chloroform though....
 
2012-06-24 04:39:33 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?


Litter box deodorizer.
 
2012-06-24 04:54:01 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?



Wear it to be nice to your girlfriend. Sheesh, it isn't going to kill you.

Unless you tried it and honestly just can't stand the smell at all as opposed to the idea of wearing cologne. But I bet your girlfriend does stuff for you just to make you happy, at least have the decency to return the favour. It's what people who are not completely self-centred do.

Besides, if you do wear it she might decide to do something extra special to be nice to you, if you know what I mean.
 
2012-06-24 04:55:21 AM
i love you all.....
 
2012-06-24 04:55:29 AM
How much variation could there be in the pheremone make-up of any given human in the first place?

Apples to apples and all...
 
2012-06-24 05:07:38 AM
img.photobucket.com
Any ?
 
2012-06-24 05:09:42 AM

JustinCase: Maybe just use it for sexy time?


We actually did that this morning during a shower, and I'm ok with that. It was going out for lunch that got the discussion going.

Nidiot: Unless you tried it and honestly just can't stand the smell at all


I really have no idea what the scent is, other than i don't like wearing cologne. Don't think i stink... She wraps herself up in my shirt and takes them home (we don't live together, yet), a trophy thing? Who knows. It's not a deal-breaker yet, just bringing it up because scent's the subject and someone brought up cologne.

Anyway, can't we just wear soap and sweat?
 
2012-06-24 05:16:12 AM
thejoshkerbelproject.com
could be fun
 
2012-06-24 05:17:00 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?


Just don't wear it every day, and if you do just use a tiny, tiny amount. Or just save it for special occasions. When I used to ride the subway into work I would always somehow be jammed next to someone who just seemed to have no idea how much cologne or perfume they were wearing. I don't know if it's just because no one ever took them aside and told them or they were just so accustomed to the smell that they didn't realize, but wow. I would arrive at work reeking. Men seemed to be the worst perpetrators, although it could just be that whatever they were wearing had a more potent odour.
 
2012-06-24 05:27:10 AM

mephisto6: Nidiot: Unless you tried it and honestly just can't stand the smell at all

I really have no idea what the scent is, other than i don't like wearing cologne. Don't think i stink... She wraps herself up in my shirt and takes them home (we don't live together, yet), a trophy thing? Who knows. It's not a deal-breaker yet, just bringing it up because scent's the subject and someone brought up cologne.

Anyway, can't we just wear soap and sweat?



Well wearing cologne doesn't hurt you and it would make her happy, so it is a really small price to pay to make someone you care about happy. I am not sure where your vehement aversion to wearing cologne comes from, perhaps you associate it with total douchebags or something, but I swear if you you are not a douche now, wearing cologne wont turn you into one, you will still be the same person you were before. In the end you can't feel it or see it and only someone very close to you will smell it. Hell, you might find you actually like how it smells. Fragrance is just another aspect in which to add pleasure in life, the way you can enjoy things that look good, feel good, sound good or taste good. Sometimes it is nice to just get pleasure from something that smells good too. It is not saying you smell bad, it is more about adding a bonus extra good smell just for fun.

Which is why I said if you actually can't stand the way it smells all bets are off and that bottle is not getting used.
 
2012-06-24 05:28:19 AM

miss diminutive: jammed next to someone who just seemed to have no idea how much cologne or perfume they were wearing. I don't know if it's just because no one ever took them aside and told them or they were just so accustomed to the smell that they didn't realize, but wow. I would arrive at work reeking


Yeah, been there and I get it. Dudes, chicas, doesn't matter... that perfume smell just puts me off, so I want to avoid that at any cost. There's just no reason to be squirting stuff on my whole self when i go out for the day.
If you bathe, you smell... well, like you. And I dig that.
 
2012-06-24 05:34:28 AM

Nidiot: but I swear if you you are not a douche now, wearing cologne wont turn you into one


that made me laugh... probably won't change my mind

/alright, i'll try to work with her
//freaking P-Diddy?
 
2012-06-24 05:35:33 AM
Sniff my balls.
 
2012-06-24 05:44:15 AM

miss diminutive:
...I don't know if it's just because no one ever took them aside and told them or they were just so accustomed to the smell that they didn't realize, but wow...


People do become accustomed to the scent they wear if they wear the same one everyday, and they will keep putting more and more on until they can smell it themselves again. Repeat that often enough and the amounts they end up using are ludicrous. Not a good thing, which is why you either don't wear it everyday or you have more than one fragrance and wear different ones on different days.

mephisto6: ...Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."...


You are not going to overpower anyone with scent if you use the technique your gf suggested. Even one squirt directly on you will not turn you into a walking olfactory nightmare. Those people who can give people nosebleeds with the amount of scent they wear are putting effort into getting that stuff sprayed as if they are repainting a stolen car.
 
2012-06-24 05:53:54 AM

miss diminutive: Men Black women of a certain age seemed to be the worst perpetrators, although it could just be that whatever they were wearing had a more potent odour.



FTFM. Some of those ladies can clear a BART car with that magnolia scent they love.
 
2012-06-24 05:54:35 AM

mephisto6:
//freaking P-Diddy?


Yeah, that would put me off too, I hope it smells awesome to make up for it. If it doesn't, use the excuse that it smells the same as the urinal cakes from when you were at school and you don't need the reminder of those days.
 
2012-06-24 05:55:15 AM

miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.


I don't think that problem is limited to guys and cologne. There's a few ladies in my apartment building who use so much perfume there is a strong trail of it in the hallways, the elevator, and into the parking garage - even when the person is long gone.

One day I could actually *taste* the perfume in the air.
 
2012-06-24 06:07:51 AM

Ed Finnerty: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

I don't think that problem is limited to guys and cologne. There's a few ladies in my apartment building who use so much perfume there is a strong trail of it in the hallways, the elevator, and into the parking garage - even when the person is long gone.

One day I could actually *taste* the perfume in the air.


I was so happy when my office went scent-free a few years ago for that very reason. And yes, women can be just as bad as men when it comes to overdoing it. The worst offender was a lady who must have had her perfume smuggled across the border because there's no way it should have been legal. Her cubicle was near the photocopier and whenever I would walk within 50 ft of her it was like being punched in the face by lilacs and Pine-Sol.

Like with everything else, moderation is key.
 
2012-06-24 06:09:30 AM
Even if this wasn't psuedoscientific bullshiat, it would only be a way of determining that you are physically attracted to somebody. And we all know what a sound basis for relationship-building that is.
 
2012-06-24 06:28:57 AM

miss diminutive: I was so happy when my office went scent-free


Waitaminute, how did this happen? Was there a meeting? What was the agenda? Scents and Sensibility?
I want in....

Her cubicle was near the photocopier
You have photocopiers:)
 
2012-06-24 06:34:35 AM
imgboot.com
 
2012-06-24 06:36:01 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: Even if this is total bs, if it'll make even a few men stop dousing themselves in cologne before walking out the door, then it's worth it.

So my gf got me this after shave/cologne set and I don't even wear that stuff. I don't like to smell it in the office, or at the sports bar with dudes trying too hard...
Anyway, she said, "Just squirt it up in the air and walk under it. it really is nice and i like the way it smells."
No, I'm not going to squirt cologne in the air and walk under it every day. Apparently she really likes it, though. I asked her what it is, and she said, "Unforgivable." Looked it up...
You want me to wear P-Diddy cologne.
"Wellll, it smells great! Pleeeeaaase???"
Well... no!
I don't wear freaking cologne, and my after shave consists of ice. What do you do with this?


how about take the hint, stinky toes.
 
2012-06-24 06:39:21 AM

mephisto6: miss diminutive: I was so happy when my office went scent-free

Waitaminute, how did this happen? Was there a meeting? What was the agenda? Scents and Sensibility?
I want in....

You've never heard of a scent free workplace? They're pretty common here (Canada).

Our office took a vote, as I recall nearly 3/4 of the office voted to make it scent-free. (to my surprise Ms Pine-Sol voted for scent free as well)
 
2012-06-24 06:47:35 AM

miss diminutive: mephisto6: miss diminutive: I was so happy when my office went scent-free

Waitaminute, how did this happen? Was there a meeting? What was the agenda? Scents and Sensibility?
I want in....

You've never heard of a scent free workplace? They're pretty common here (Canada).

Our office took a vote, as I recall nearly 3/4 of the office voted to make it scent-free. (to my surprise Ms Pine-Sol voted for scent free as well)

s

I've been on steering commitees for many things, not one of them involving scents... how cool is that.
So what happens to the dissenters? They get bannished to the shipping dock?

I think it's cool you got to actually vote on that, eh
 
2012-06-24 06:52:51 AM

KrispyKritter: how about take the hint, stinky toes.


Man... i wash me toes almost twice a month. Don't be all *eyeroll* wit me.
 
2012-06-24 06:53:12 AM
One other side benefit to the whole thing is getting to see how they dress (sloppy, fashionable, XXL),,,,,
 
Displayed 50 of 104 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report