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(CBS New York)   Bear stops by takes a dip in homeowner's pool, twink prefers the hot tub   (newyork.cbslocal.com) divider line 49
    More: Amusing, James Joyce, homeowners, backyards, CBSNewYork  
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5959 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Jun 2012 at 9:31 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2012-06-22 09:33:48 AM  
What?
 
2012-06-22 09:34:01 AM  
In case you don't want to bother parsing the headline, here's a picture of it:

i45.tinypic.com
 
2012-06-22 09:34:03 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org

Approves.
 
2012-06-22 09:36:23 AM  

spentmiles: In case you don't want to bother parsing the headline, here's a picture of it:

[i45.tinypic.com image 539x308]


I prefered not parsing, thanks.
 
2012-06-22 09:36:56 AM  
"I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

For God's sake, woman! Your kids will never make it in this world if they don't know how to fight off a few bears.
(Damned bedroom-community urbanites!)
 
2012-06-22 09:38:58 AM  
Was it Charles Carreon's mother's house? Was the bear there for some sweet sexy mother bear love?
 
2012-06-22 09:40:07 AM  
I haven't posted on fark in months. I just came here to ridicule subby's ridiculous headline.
 
2012-06-22 09:44:49 AM  
Some bears prefer the hot tub.
 
2012-06-22 09:47:41 AM  
yeah, did he drink his own pee?
 
2012-06-22 09:48:06 AM  
I see what you did there, subby.

And I wish that I could un-see it.
 
2012-06-22 09:52:39 AM  
I thought it was funny.

Are we being all sensitive on Fark now? What happened to the "Welcome to Fark" anything goes attitude? Did I miss an announcement.
 
2012-06-22 09:57:35 AM  
blogs.ocweekly.com
 
2012-06-22 09:58:23 AM  
FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.
 
2012-06-22 09:58:50 AM  
I HEART this headline SO much I want to French kiss it! Wait, I'm a girl...the subjects wouldn't like that...
 
2012-06-22 10:06:36 AM  
My dad just sent me some cell phone snaps (would post but they're pretty blurry) of the bear that has been terrorizing the neighborhood's trashcans and small pets. Does he live in Montana, or Alaska? No, suburban Connecticut. Black bears are a freakin scourge these days.

We obviously need to just import larger predators to manage their population. Dinosaurs, maybe?
 
2012-06-22 10:07:43 AM  
"she called 911 right away"

What did she expect Barney Fife to do with a passing black bear taking a drink from her pool?
 
2012-06-22 10:09:16 AM  
It was terribly naive of me to GIS 'Bear pool'. Really should have thought that one over.
 
2012-06-22 10:10:04 AM  
Giggled at the headline.
 
2012-06-22 10:18:44 AM  

DirkTheDaring: It was terribly naive of me to GIS 'Bear pool'. Really should have thought that one over.


While you're at it, I hear lemons have really cool parties when nobody's watching.
 
2012-06-22 10:24:39 AM  

Badgerlad: DirkTheDaring: It was terribly naive of me to GIS 'Bear pool'. Really should have thought that one over.

While you're at it, I hear lemons have really cool parties when nobody's watching.


Do they, perchance, have specially colored breakfast pastries?
 
2012-06-22 10:37:33 AM  
Darn twinks always ruin a game. No clue, never read chat.

/if that isn't obscure, then truly nothing is obscure here.
 
2012-06-22 10:42:14 AM  

Jim.Casy: My dad just sent me some cell phone snaps (would post but they're pretty blurry) of the bear that has been terrorizing the neighborhood's trashcans and small pets. Does he live in Montana, or Alaska? No, suburban Connecticut. Black bears are a freakin scourge these days.

We obviously need to just import larger predators to manage their population. Dinosaurs, maybe?


Snakes or gorillas would be my first bet.
 
2012-06-22 10:53:56 AM  

Badgerlad: DirkTheDaring: It was terribly naive of me to GIS 'Bear pool'. Really should have thought that one over.

While you're at it, I hear lemons have really cool parties when nobody's watching.


If you think those parties are interesting, try giving Extacy or "E" to some mountain-dwelling horned mammals.
 
2012-06-22 11:10:19 AM  

spentmiles: In case you don't want to bother parsing the headline, here's a picture of it:

[i45.tinypic.com image 539x308]


I have this urge to clean it with rubbing alcohol.
 
2012-06-22 11:16:42 AM  

Jim.Casy: My dad just sent me some cell phone snaps (would post but they're pretty blurry) of the bear that has been terrorizing the neighborhood's trashcans and small pets. Does he live in Montana, or Alaska? No, suburban Connecticut. Black bears are a freakin scourge these days.

We obviously need to just import larger predators to manage their population. Dinosaurs, maybe?


Repopulating grizzly bears and mountain lions will surely solve this problem.
 
2012-06-22 11:21:09 AM  
"I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Never leave your children alone under any circumstances. Ever. They must be attached to you at all times, preferably by a leash.
 
Biv
2012-06-22 11:28:22 AM  
FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Why in the fark, when you have an open pool, were you letting your kids out in the back yard without adult supervision in the first farking place?

/I hate people.
 
2012-06-22 11:49:32 AM  

oldfarthenry: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

For God's sake, woman! Your kids will never make it in this world if they don't know how to fight off a few bears.
(Damned bedroom-community urbanites!)


Not just that, but make some noise and bears tend to run off. Bears don't want a fight if they can avoid it.
 
2012-06-22 11:54:28 AM  
What a twink might look like:

img.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-22 12:09:47 PM  

Baloo Uriza: oldfarthenry: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

For God's sake, woman! Your kids will never make it in this world if they don't know how to fight off a few bears.
(Damned bedroom-community urbanites!)

Not just that, but make some noise and bears tend to run off. Bears don't want a fight if they can avoid it.



I would just sent my cat outside. She invariably scares the living bajeesis out of angry rottweilers and veterinary technicians. I'm pretty sure she would make the expression change from "Does a bear shiat in the woods?" to "Does a bear shiat in my pool?"
 
2012-06-22 12:30:33 PM  

HopScotchNSoda: I would just sent my cat outside.


t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-06-22 12:40:50 PM  

redmid17: Jim.Casy: My dad just sent me some cell phone snaps (would post but they're pretty blurry) of the bear that has been terrorizing the neighborhood's trashcans and small pets. Does he live in Montana, or Alaska? No, suburban Connecticut. Black bears are a freakin scourge these days.

We obviously need to just import larger predators to manage their population. Dinosaurs, maybe?

Snakes or gorillas would be my first bet.


When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death...
 
2012-06-22 12:53:26 PM  

Vodka Zombie: Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.


[oh-you.jpg]
 
2012-06-22 01:24:26 PM  
images.sodahead.com
 
2012-06-22 02:15:40 PM  
Bears repeating?

/got nuthin'
 
2012-06-22 03:53:39 PM  

LeafyGreens: What a twink might look like:

[img.photobucket.com image 262x367]


Beautiful, delicious twinks.

a1.ec-images.myspacecdn.com
 
2012-06-22 08:43:26 PM  
Are you equating a bear to a twink, subby?

Have you actually met a bear in RL on their territory, alone or with friends, twink?

Your equation will likely change.

Or not, depending on whether you carry guns, The E-Gun-a-lize-r(s), that is.

Sort of.

Many bears have ignored guns and mauled twinks anyway, no?

Hmmm.

I repeat: met any real bears lately?

;)
 
2012-06-22 08:45:49 PM  

Indubitably: Are you equating a bear to a twink, subby?

Have you actually met a bear in RL on their territory, alone or with friends, twink?

Your equation will likely change.

Or not, depending on whether you carry guns, The E-Gun-a-lize-r(s), that is.

Sort of.

Many bears have ignored guns and mauled twinks anyway, no?

Hmmm.

I repeat: met any real bears lately?

;)


Oh, and P.S. what the fark is a twink, you?
 
2012-06-22 09:24:44 PM  

Keizer_Ghidorah: LeafyGreens: What a twink might look like:

[img.photobucket.com image 262x367]

Beautiful, delicious twinks.

[a1.ec-images.myspacecdn.com image 525x700]


Why is there mold growing on his torso.
 
2012-06-22 11:19:47 PM  

SirFire: I haven't posted on fark in months. I just came here to ridicule subby's ridiculous headline.


So when are you going to actually do it? Or are you just going to talk about it?

/stupid zeroes
//great headline, subby
 
2012-06-22 11:22:39 PM  

onestr8: I thought it was funny.

Are we being all sensitive on Fark now? What happened to the "Welcome to Fark" anything goes attitude? Did I miss an announcement.


There's nothing to be sensitive about. Bears are bears, and twinks are twinks, headline is cute and not derogatory towards anyone.

/queer myself
//people being offended on others' behalf need a new hobby
 
2012-06-22 11:28:55 PM  

Vodka Zombie: FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.


Seriously. They're afraid of cats.
 
2012-06-22 11:30:38 PM  

Jim.Casy: My dad just sent me some cell phone snaps (would post but they're pretty blurry) of the bear that has been terrorizing the neighborhood's trashcans and small pets. Does he live in Montana, or Alaska? No, suburban Connecticut. Black bears are a freakin scourge these days.

We obviously need to just import larger predators to manage their population. Dinosaurs, maybe?


I live in Connecticut, and I'm not worried. The coyotes and bobcats will deal with them. If they're not trampled by deer first. Or smothered by squirrels.
 
2012-06-22 11:36:34 PM  

Hermione_Granger: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Never leave your children alone under any circumstances. Ever. They must be attached to you at all times, preferably by a leash.


I'd go further than that, and encourage parents to never let them leave their gonads in the first place. Can't be too careful.
 
2012-06-22 11:43:59 PM  

Sylvia_Bandersnatch: Vodka Zombie: FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.

Seriously. They're afraid of cats.


Ned?

;)
 
2012-06-23 06:33:11 AM  

Sylvia_Bandersnatch: Vodka Zombie: FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.

Seriously. They're afraid of cats.


Yep. If you're more menacing than a bowl of bad potato salad, black bears will usually scamper.
 
2012-06-23 01:23:22 PM  

LeafyGreens: What a twink might look like:


Sometimes the bears at the pool will adopt a twink, but he's at least going to have to grow a beard first.

dl.dropbox.com

/I mean, there are limits...
 
2012-06-23 03:41:13 PM  

Vodka Zombie: Sylvia_Bandersnatch: Vodka Zombie: FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.

Seriously. They're afraid of cats.

Yep. If you're more menacing than a bowl of bad potato salad, black bears will usually scamper.


That surely explains why there are many more attacks and fatalities caused by black bears than any other large predator in the US.
 
2012-06-23 04:19:25 PM  

Keizer_Ghidorah: Vodka Zombie: Sylvia_Bandersnatch: Vodka Zombie: FTFA: "I actually don't plan on letting my kids out in the back yard without adult supervision anymore," Joyce said.

Joyce? It's a black bear. They're about as threatening as a toothless, geriatric poodle with a panic disorder.

Seriously. They're afraid of cats.

Yep. If you're more menacing than a bowl of bad potato salad, black bears will usually scamper.

That surely explains why there are many more attacks and fatalities caused by black bears than any other large predator in the US.


I've never had a problem. But, then again, I don't go chasing after the cute wittle babby bear cubs or freak out when I see a black bear.
 
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