If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(TMZ)   Kim Kardashian's sex tape was directed by Kris Jenner, claims Kris Humphries, who alleges his mother-in-law was very professional in shooting it   (tmz.com) divider line 106
    More: Sick, Kris Jenner, Kim Kardashian, Kris Humphries, Lucky Charms, sex tapes  
•       •       •

9459 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 Jun 2012 at 10:00 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



106 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-21 06:34:07 PM
BOOM goes the dynamite.
 
2012-06-21 06:39:43 PM
If OJ knew that killing those people would result in this, he wouldn't have done it.
 
2012-06-21 06:49:58 PM
Who farking cares?
 
2012-06-21 06:59:56 PM
OK, Kris is the mom and Bruce is the dad, right?

I'm OK with this.
 
2012-06-21 07:02:53 PM
i.imgur.com

R.I.P. Bruce Jenner, Porn Director
 
2012-06-21 07:06:22 PM
It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF
 
2012-06-21 07:18:52 PM
Time to go home and watch it again with this in mind.
 
2012-06-21 07:33:06 PM
Well, Kris is apparently a horrible director and couldn't get a halfway decent performance out of Kim.
 
2012-06-21 07:52:40 PM

9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.


I've never watched the vid. If she's shaved, I don't want to. Tired of that crap.
 
2012-06-21 08:07:13 PM
She was under direction and still put on that bad of a show? Makes you wonder how terrible she is without someone telling her what to do.
 
2012-06-21 08:22:40 PM
Can someone please direct me to said tape, at a safe site, so I can review Mr. Jenner's directing abilities myself?

Thanks!
 
2012-06-21 09:28:00 PM
The family that plays together stays together.
 
2012-06-21 10:05:14 PM

incendi: She was under direction and still put on that bad of a show? Makes you wonder how terrible she is without someone telling her what to do.


Yeah, probably the most boring celeb sex tape ever leaked. Biatch could have at least faked enjoying it a little better.
 
2012-06-21 10:08:36 PM

Somacandra: 9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.

I've never watched the vid. If she's shaved, I don't want to. Tired of that crap.


She's Armenian. If she wasn't shaved the whole vid would be about Ray J's dick tearing through the brambles.
 
2012-06-21 10:09:59 PM

imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF


She is hideous.
 
2012-06-21 10:19:10 PM

Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.


Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.
 
2012-06-21 10:19:51 PM
I have Kim's tape one notch better than Gene Simmons.
Or tied? Who cares they both suck,but Gene's maybe funnier.
 
2012-06-21 10:20:44 PM

Somacandra: R.I.P. Bruce Jenner Lois Griffin, Porn Director


/FTFY
 
2012-06-21 10:22:12 PM

9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.


You should get out more.
 
2012-06-21 10:25:22 PM

Somacandra: 9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.

I've never watched the vid. If she's shaved, I don't want to. Tired of that crap.


Ditto... don't get me wrong, I like a well groomed snatch. Makes it easier to get in there and not get a nose/teeth/mouth full of pubes. But I could never get into the hardwood floors style.
 
2012-06-21 10:28:34 PM

BigMevy: Somacandra: 9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.

I've never watched the vid. If she's shaved, I don't want to. Tired of that crap.

Ditto... don't get me wrong, I like a well groomed snatch. Makes it easier to get in there and not get a nose/teeth/mouth full of pubes. But I could never get into the hardwood floors style.


The stubble comes back fast. Makes you feel like you're going down on a belt sander.
 
2012-06-21 10:30:07 PM

rickycal78: Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.

Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.


I do not find her the least bit attractive.
 
2012-06-21 10:32:36 PM
She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.
 
2012-06-21 10:36:34 PM
So, the guy who got dumped by Kim Kardashian accuses her mother of directing her daughter's sex tape. In a text to his former girlfriend.

That seems like reliable information. Nice scoop, TMZ. I'm sure we're all really confident that this is real.
 
2012-06-21 10:37:34 PM

Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.


I have a problem with people who use that term...
 
2012-06-21 10:43:01 PM

Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.


So what happens if you're with some girl for a while and you've been getting your groove on with her for years and one day she reveals that in an experimental phase she once let an ex piss on her? Do you dump her? What if she has a kid and one time when changing that kid, the cold air hits his equipment and he lets loose and pisses on her? Do you dump her? I mean I could see not going for someone who does that kind of thing intentionally on a regular basis, but sheesh.
 
2012-06-21 10:46:39 PM

spiderfishx: Somacandra: 9beers: I'll say one thing, Kim has one of the nicest snatches I've ever seen.

I've never watched the vid. If she's shaved, I don't want to. Tired of that crap.

She's Armenian. If she wasn't shaved the whole vid would be about Ray J's dick tearing through the brambles.


+1 for use of "brambles".
 
2012-06-21 10:53:47 PM
Seems like some studman69 going on here. Also, I've never seen the video. Wouldn't know where to look for it.

Guess I have a lot to learn about the Internets.
 
2012-06-21 11:02:46 PM

Surool: Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.

I have a problem with people who use that term...


So does the wife.
 
2012-06-21 11:04:18 PM

Surool: Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.

I have a problem with people who use that term...



Nut mustard ?
Ball snot ?
Salt malt ?
 
2012-06-21 11:06:14 PM

rickycal78: Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.

So what happens if you're with some girl for a while and you've been getting your groove on with her for years and one day she reveals that in an experimental phase she once let an ex piss on her? Do you dump her? What if she has a kid and one time when changing that kid, the cold air hits his equipment and he lets loose and pisses on her? Do you dump her? I mean I could see not going for someone who does that kind of thing intentionally on a regular basis, but sheesh.


Experimentally years ago? It would be hard to overcome honestly. Just one of the mental blocks I have massive trouble getting around. As for a kid. The wife and I have three, not to mention all the one year old and under we've watched for years, so yeah, we get sprayed and splattered, but that's to be expected. I don't care if you're a ninja, you have a kid, eventually, you get tagged.
 
2012-06-21 11:06:42 PM

One Bad Apple: Surool: Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.

I have a problem with people who use that term...


Nut mustard ?
Ball snot ?
Salt malt ?


Man goo?
Peter snot?
Manaisse?
Man Chowder?
Two ball throat lotion?
 
2012-06-21 11:09:03 PM

rickycal78: Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.

Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.


Given that she is vile, cretinous and a shining example of everything contemptible and loathsome about American culture, I will have to agree that she is hideous.
 
2012-06-21 11:09:43 PM

One Bad Apple: Surool: Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on. Cannot ever touch a woman who has been showered or covered with someone else's feces or piss. Chance to nail Kate Upton? Not if she got shiat or pissed on.

/ Not gay, just some kind of mental block with bodily fluids.
//The bad fluids.
///Not baby batter.

I have a problem with people who use that term...


Nut mustard ?
Ball snot ?
Salt malt ?


Your jib, I like the cut of it.
 
2012-06-21 11:11:52 PM

El Freak: rickycal78: Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.

Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.

Given that she is vile, cretinous and a shining example of everything contemptible and loathsome about American culture, I will have to agree that she is hideous.


So basically the two of you and numerous others can't separate the purely physical aspects of a person from their personality. Got it. I mean sure I wouldn't want to date her even if I did have more than a snowball's chance in hell, but she still looks damn good.
 
2012-06-21 11:15:11 PM
My two cents? When she tries to look sexy, she has these blank eyes and slack mouth. When she isn't posing, she's actually pretty. But she just tries too hard.
 
2012-06-21 11:19:00 PM

rickycal78: El Freak: rickycal78: Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.

Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.

Given that she is vile, cretinous and a shining example of everything contemptible and loathsome about American culture, I will have to agree that she is hideous.

So basically the two of you and numerous others can't separate the purely physical aspects of a person from their personality. Got it. I mean sure I wouldn't want to date her even if I did have more than a snowball's chance in hell, but she still looks damn good.


Perhaps people like us (yes I wouldn't hit it either even given the chance) extend our conscience to our dicks. We will remember it, and therefore would rather not. However, you put on your mining helmet and go to town.
 
2012-06-21 11:19:27 PM
wat, no link to her noodz snatches?


/drunk
 
2012-06-21 11:23:29 PM
I would drag my genitalia thorough broken glass just to buy a lottery ticket for the chance to win the opportunity to sniff the ass off the dog that ate her panties three days ago.

/dat ass
//would climb it with my peton, if you know what I mean
///and I think you do
 
2012-06-21 11:23:55 PM

king of vegas: Seems like some studman69 going on here. Also, I've never seen the video. Wouldn't know where to look for it.

Guess I have a lot to learn about the Internets.


LET ME GOOGLE THAT FOR YOU!

/not actually going to provide a link, but really, it's easy
 
2012-06-21 11:26:56 PM

Cookbook's Anarchist:

Perhaps people like us (yes I wouldn't hit it either even given the chance) extend our conscience to our dicks. We will remember it, and therefore would rather not. However, you put on your mining helmet and go to town.


There is a word for the kind people that cannot separate physical sexual attractiveness from personality and intellect.


That word is women.
 
2012-06-21 11:36:00 PM

One Bad Apple: Cookbook's Anarchist:

Perhaps people like us (yes I wouldn't hit it either even given the chance) extend our conscience to our dicks. We will remember it, and therefore would rather not. However, you put on your mining helmet and go to town.

There is a word for the kind people that cannot separate physical sexual attractiveness from personality and intellect.


That word is women.


There's no women on Fark. Let's call them farksexuals
 
2012-06-21 11:38:53 PM
That whole family is garbage. Utter trash.
 
2012-06-21 11:40:25 PM
I believe it. People say Kim Kardashian is a great businesswoman, but she isn't. It's her mom that runs all of her businesses. Kris Jenner is brilliant and utterly sociopathic, and if I had a degree in English Lit. I could probably make some sort of awesomely smart literary reference to a Machiavellian matriarch who dominates her daughter's lives and arranges the perfect political marriages for them.

You could use words like "whores out" and "pimps" to describe what Jenner does with her daughters vis a via their reality shows. It wouldn't/doesn't shock or surprise me at all to find out that she directed one of her daughters to make a porn to get the ball rolling. Brilliant and sociopathic.
 
2012-06-21 11:45:35 PM

skepticultist: I believe it. People say Kim Kardashian is a great businesswoman, but she isn't. It's her mom that runs all of her businesses. Kris Jenner is brilliant and utterly sociopathic, and if I had a degree in English Lit. I could probably make some sort of awesomely smart literary reference to a Machiavellian matriarch who dominates her daughter's lives and arranges the perfect political marriages for them.

You could use words like "whores out" and "pimps" to describe what Jenner does with her daughters vis a via their reality shows. It wouldn't/doesn't shock or surprise me at all to find out that she directed one of her daughters to make a porn to get the ball rolling. Brilliant and sociopathic.


Sounds completely like my ex. The extent that she goes to make my life miserable because I left her ass back in psycho land is stunning.

/Yes she is a sociopath, so says the court ordered psychological screening she was ordered to undergo during the divorce.
//Don't stick your dick in crazy.
///Her parents are just as bad.
 
2012-06-21 11:55:56 PM
Is anyone surprised
 
2012-06-21 11:57:19 PM

doczoidberg: Can someone please direct me to said tape, at a safe site, so I can review Mr. Jenner's directing abilities myself?

Thanks!


Download utorrent and http://1337x.org/ is your friend
 
2012-06-22 12:04:56 AM

Brian Blessed's Bastard Boy: She got pissed on.


No, she didn't.
 
2012-06-22 12:06:15 AM

Mugato: If OJ knew that killing those people would result in this, he wouldn't have done it.


I LOL'd.
 
2012-06-22 12:50:43 AM

Cookbook's Anarchist: rickycal78: El Freak: rickycal78: Mock26: imapirate: It took me forever to realize who this vapid coont is, but I've come to two conclusions:

1. She is absolutely gorgeous

2. I want her to DIAF

She is hideous.

Really? I mean I can sort of understand the folks that go all "The fact that she's a vapid twunt totally cancels out any physical attraction I might have had for her". I can even understand the folks that think she's got too much junk in the trunk for their tastes. But it's pretty hard to deny that she's pretty in the face, even though a portion of that is obvious makeup and so forth.

Given that she is vile, cretinous and a shining example of everything contemptible and loathsome about American culture, I will have to agree that she is hideous.

So basically the two of you and numerous others can't separate the purely physical aspects of a person from their personality. Got it. I mean sure I wouldn't want to date her even if I did have more than a snowball's chance in hell, but she still looks damn good.

Perhaps people like us (yes I wouldn't hit it either even given the chance) extend our conscience to our dicks. We will remember it, and therefore would rather not. However, you put on your mining helmet and go to town.




People like you are just good liars. So good I think you have even convinced yourselves of this crap.

Dress up your BS with misplaced self righteousness all you want guys, but if you are a decent, single man and you have the chance to bang some hot 5'2" 116lb moronic woman.... you will. You absolutely will.

I honestly can not think of a rational reason not to have sex with this woman if given the chance.
 
Displayed 50 of 106 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report