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(AZCentral)   Woman on board a plane to Phoenix decides in mid-flight she'd rather have a weekend at Bernie's instead   (azcentral.com ) divider line
    More: Strange, flights  
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8685 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jun 2012 at 11:25 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-06-21 11:18:52 AM  
She must have had the fish

/this joke would work better if US airlines still served food
 
2012-06-21 11:27:24 AM  
They stick the bodies in the lav.
 
2012-06-21 11:29:01 AM  
And it's Delta. They'll probably try to charge her for the extra carrion.
 
2012-06-21 11:29:11 AM  
Kelly Singley didn't know whether the passenger died on the plane.

Wow...really? You think someone dragged her dead ass onboard without anyone noticing? This is about the most pathetic corporate "cover our ass" phrase i've ever heard. She must be following the "deny everything, nobody ever dies on our property" rule. Ladies and Gents, the new Mrs Baghdad Bob.
 
2012-06-21 11:29:49 AM  
Fantastic. I'm taking a flight later today. Now if the guy sitting next to me falls asleep, I'll keep subconsciously checking to make sure he's still breathing.
 
2012-06-21 11:31:38 AM  
Most likely a blood clot broke free and killed her. That whole 'sitting for a long period of time on planes' thing is true...

and funnier still, one of my co-workers from the UK had her flight delayed for several hours due to some bloke having a heart attack on her plane just last week as well. Seems to be a trend.
 
2012-06-21 11:31:41 AM  
One of my favorite guilty pleasure movies. Right up there with Road House.
 
2012-06-21 11:34:33 AM  

Bit'O'Gristle: Kelly Singley didn't know whether the passenger died on the plane.

Wow...really? You think someone dragged her dead ass onboard without anyone noticing? This is about the most pathetic corporate "cover our ass" phrase i've ever heard. She must be following the "deny everything, nobody ever dies on our property" rule. Ladies and Gents, the new Mrs Baghdad Bob.


I believe she meant as opposed to just being unconscious on the plane and dying later after they deplaned her.
 
2012-06-21 11:39:29 AM  
Where did they bury the survivors?
Queue Glen Campbell, "By the time I get to Phoenix..."
 
2012-06-21 11:39:51 AM  
One possible scenario:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuNylxOHbvI
 
2012-06-21 11:41:07 AM  

mcreadyblue: They stick the bodies in the lav.


Where am I supposed to join the Mile-High club then? ...oh, I guess I still could.

/at least she couldn't shoot me down
 
2012-06-21 11:46:57 AM  
Usually they want to make sure the person isn't declared dead until they're on the ground and off the plane.

If they get declared dead mid-flight by a doctor onboard, apparently they have to figure out what county the plane was over at that time, call up that county's coroner, and have them fly out to wherever the plane landed to deal with the person.
 
2012-06-21 11:47:21 AM  

mcreadyblue: They stick the bodies in the lav.


It makes taking a dump much more difficult, but not impossible.

/the seat will be more "cushiony" and comfortable.
 
2012-06-21 11:47:28 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: And it's Delta. They'll probably try to charge her for the extra carrion.


I laughed
 
2012-06-21 11:50:20 AM  
She wasn't dead. She was pining for the fjords.
 
2012-06-21 11:50:48 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: And it's Delta. They'll probably try to charge her for the extra carrion.


You'll be here all week
 
2012-06-21 12:01:24 PM  
Pic from the flight...

thecomicking.net
 
2012-06-21 12:13:26 PM  
At least this time Aunt Edna didn't have to be strapped to the roof of the family truckster all the way to Phoenix.
 
2012-06-21 12:14:08 PM  

Wade_Wilson: Fantastic. I'm taking a flight later today. Now if the guy sitting next to me falls asleep, I'll keep subconsciously checking to make sure he's still breathing.


Just grab him by the collar and yell 'don't die on me Jim'. At the most twice would suffice for he won't try to sleep after that.

/surely, it doesn't matter what is name is
//don't call me shirley
 
2012-06-21 12:14:54 PM  

Grapple: Most likely a blood clot broke free and killed her. That whole 'sitting for a long period of time on planes' thing is true...


They took off from Phoenix and only made it to Colorado Springs. I don't think that was a long period of time.
 
2012-06-21 12:21:35 PM  

Orgasmatron138: One of my favorite guilty pleasure movies. Right up there with Road House.


Where the hell is Bernie?

Oh he went out for more daiquiri mix.
 
2012-06-21 12:39:37 PM  
She didn't have details on what led the woman to become unresponsive


Death. That would be death.
 
2012-06-21 12:43:40 PM  

FirstDennis: She didn't have details on what led the woman to become unresponsive


Death. That would be death.


Keyboard. You owe me one.
 
2012-06-21 12:44:05 PM  
She waited too long to leave Detroit....
 
2012-06-21 12:44:37 PM  

WalMartian: Grapple: Most likely a blood clot broke free and killed her. That whole 'sitting for a long period of time on planes' thing is true...

They took off from Phoenix and only made it to Colorado Springs. I don't think that was a long period of time.


They took off from Detroit. They were airborne 2:45 by the time they landed here.
 
2012-06-21 01:14:01 PM  

protectyourlimbs: Pic from the flight...

[thecomicking.net image 284x178]


I was just going to say that she must've been dead tired.

/think of the smell
//stuck on a plane with a dead body
 
2012-06-21 01:39:02 PM  

Yanks_RSJ: Orgasmatron138: One of my favorite guilty pleasure movies. Right up there with Road House.

Where the hell is Bernie?

Oh he went out for more daiquiri mix.


That movie is a functioning definition of FunBad.
 
2012-06-21 01:39:56 PM  
She must have looked at a forcast and died of a heart attack. 113 today.
 
2012-06-21 02:04:08 PM  
I like the last line of the article: "There were 151 people onboard"
Is that before or after the woman died?
 
2012-06-21 02:24:39 PM  

Trucker: I like the last line of the article: "There were 151 people onboard"
Is that before or after the woman died?


Both.
 
2012-06-21 03:06:59 PM  

RogueVortex: Trucker: I like the last line of the article: "There were 151 people onboard"
Is that before or after the woman died?

Both.


*snert*
 
2012-06-21 03:09:22 PM  
How much would it suck if someone died next to you on a flight. How the fark are you going to get them to move their legs so you can go to the lavatory?

On the plus side, you can shove their arm off the armrest, and have all the space for yourself. Plus, I believe airline rules allow you to take their peanuts and half can of Coke.
 
2012-06-21 03:10:33 PM  

DeathByGeekSquad: protectyourlimbs: Pic from the flight...

[thecomicking.net image 284x178]

I was just going to say that she must've been dead tired.

/think of the smell
//stuck on a plane with a dead body


how fast do you think bodies start to decompose?

it takes several hrs just to reach rigor mortis
 
2012-06-21 06:44:32 PM  
What a woman on a plane may look like:

www.womansinsite.com
 
2012-06-21 06:59:22 PM  

cherrydog: it takes several hrs just to reach rigor mortis


Rigor, please.
 
2012-06-21 07:13:58 PM  
Faster than taking the stairway... to Heaven.
 
2012-06-21 09:54:42 PM  
Another name for the Fawlty Airlines Book of Remembrance.

Better not charge her for breakfast.
 
2012-06-22 12:40:24 AM  
Well, at least she wasn't talking or snoring, or--oh, wait a minute.
 
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