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(Time)   What your dog says about your sex life. "You really should find a human partner" strangely absent   (newsfeed.time.com) divider line 257
    More: Interesting, Labrador Retriever, Rottweilers, German Shepherd, Mens' Love, Scottie Pippen  
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13725 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jun 2012 at 10:33 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-20 10:35:27 AM
rut row Shaggy
 
2012-06-20 10:36:01 AM
I have Pekingese and no sex life.

/Not sure what that means.
 
2012-06-20 10:36:33 AM
As for guys with dogs, women most like men with German Shepherds, Golden Retrievers, Labrador Retrievers, Siberian Huskies and French Bulldogs.

Huh?!?!
 
2012-06-20 10:36:39 AM
Sick

Excuse me, I'll be in my lab
 
2012-06-20 10:38:15 AM
That was a let down.. I was expecting a joking article with stupid and funny quotes of what a dog might actually say. Stupid Time...
 
2012-06-20 10:38:23 AM
I have a German Shepard Lab mix. I'd be very marriagable, if I wasn't already married.
 
2012-06-20 10:38:32 AM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-06-20 10:39:45 AM
The sex life of most farkers IS kinda ruff!
 
2012-06-20 10:39:47 AM
"Not so ruff"?
 
2012-06-20 10:40:03 AM
As for all you mixed breeds in te pound? You're all gonna die.

Every dog I've ever owned has been a pound mutt. I don't plan on changing that.
 
2012-06-20 10:40:19 AM
What about greyhounds?

Generally mellow yet able to outperform all others when need be.
 
2012-06-20 10:40:33 AM
I have a German Shepherd/Lab mix and a German Shepherd. Does that mean chicks will be attracted to me? Not that there's anything wrong with that,,,I just like men better.
 
2012-06-20 10:40:57 AM
blowmy900.info

"Man, you're not going to BELIEVE the shiat that went on here last night..."
 
2012-06-20 10:41:24 AM
If anybody needs me I'll be in my lab.
 
2012-06-20 10:41:34 AM
How about "If someone worries about what your dog means about your sex life, you should pack your bags and run".
 
2012-06-20 10:41:38 AM
"Close the damn door, will ya?"
 
2012-06-20 10:43:11 AM
i294.photobucket.com

i294.photobucket.com

Ladies what does my Basset Hound say about me?

/yes I'll shamelessly post his pictures in any thread because he's awesome
 
2012-06-20 10:43:19 AM
FTFA

"In fact, people see men owning a Golden Retriever as 10 times more likely to be "marriage material" than one owning a Pit Bull. Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered "slimy" or "sketchy" than someone who owns a Siberian Husky."

Sigh, glad to know the general perception of Pit Bulls extends to their owner as well. People to tend to cross to the other side of the street when they see me and my baby on our run charging down the sidewalk. She's an adorable little runt of a pit, but still 40 pounds of solid muscle. Granted i'm a big guy running as well, so i can understand them wanting to get out of the way of the train.

I wonder what kind of dogs i should be looking for as a Proud Pit Owner?

I tried dating a girl with a beagle, then one with a dachshund, and one with a chihuahua (she named it after a Vampire from a book...). All ended in flaming wrecks of relationships, but i had my fun while it lasted.

Someday i'll find a nice mommy for her. Maybe she will have a friend for my little buddy. Until then, it's just the 2 of us.

fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net

oh, and the "Pit" i keep refering to. Quite the little runt.
 
2012-06-20 10:44:20 AM
My puppy is okay with this.

/actually, he's now a large doggie, but still cute
 
2012-06-20 10:45:27 AM
So I can expect women to rip my clothing off and mount me for reverse cowgirl, when I introduce them to my timber wolf?
 
2012-06-20 10:46:28 AM

Expolaris: FTFA

"In fact, people see men owning a Golden Retriever as 10 times more likely to be "marriage material" than one owning a Pit Bull. Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered "slimy" or "sketchy" than someone who owns a Siberian Husky."

Sigh, glad to know the general perception of Pit Bulls extends to their owner as well. People to tend to cross to the other side of the street when they see me and my baby on our run charging down the sidewalk. She's an adorable little runt of a pit, but still 40 pounds of solid muscle. Granted i'm a big guy running as well, so i can understand them wanting to get out of the way of the train.

I wonder what kind of dogs i should be looking for as a Proud Pit Owner?

I tried dating a girl with a beagle, then one with a dachshund, and one with a chihuahua (she named it after a Vampire from a book...). All ended in flaming wrecks of relationships, but i had my fun while it lasted.

Someday i'll find a nice mommy for her. Maybe she will have a friend for my little buddy. Until then, it's just the 2 of us.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net image 640x480]

oh, and the "Pit" i keep refering to. Quite the little runt.


Find a woman with a pit or a large breed dog like a mastiff.
 
2012-06-20 10:47:13 AM
My local shelter rescued this group of a boxer/lab mix that has a good temperment. We've been adopting them, but they keep dying.
I keep running out of Skippy, too. I wonder if their peanut allergy has anything to do with all of this.
 
2012-06-20 10:48:11 AM
What does my dog say about my sex life? Well, if she is lying next to my wife when I turn in for the night she says "Guess you're not getting laid tonight, better luck next time."
 
2012-06-20 10:48:47 AM
I saw no mention of terrier breeds. Where does that leave people like me? Then again... I guess a terrier person would be considered high strung. Yeah. Makes sense.

So... here's Goat Puppy... our miniature wolf terrier

sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-06-20 10:49:25 AM

meat0918: Expolaris: FTFA

"In fact, people see men owning a Golden Retriever as 10 times more likely to be "marriage material" than one owning a Pit Bull. Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered "slimy" or "sketchy" than someone who owns a Siberian Husky."

Sigh, glad to know the general perception of Pit Bulls extends to their owner as well. People to tend to cross to the other side of the street when they see me and my baby on our run charging down the sidewalk. She's an adorable little runt of a pit, but still 40 pounds of solid muscle. Granted i'm a big guy running as well, so i can understand them wanting to get out of the way of the train.

I wonder what kind of dogs i should be looking for as a Proud Pit Owner?

I tried dating a girl with a beagle, then one with a dachshund, and one with a chihuahua (she named it after a Vampire from a book...). All ended in flaming wrecks of relationships, but i had my fun while it lasted.

Someday i'll find a nice mommy for her. Maybe she will have a friend for my little buddy. Until then, it's just the 2 of us.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net image 640x480]

oh, and the "Pit" i keep refering to. Quite the little runt.

Find a woman with a pit or a large breed dog like a mastiff.


Hmm. There is merit in this advice. Thanks man.

I met one such girl in my life during grad school. Gorgeous Indian girl who had a gigantic Mastiff named Bowser. She was already engaged when i met her, but the dogs always got along well. Big dogs tend to get their play time out early and fast and then rest together once you let them handle their "OMG ITS ANOTHER DOG" excitement.
 
2012-06-20 10:50:32 AM
img443.imageshack.us

img525.imageshack.us

Judge away, ladies
 
2012-06-20 10:50:43 AM
I had two chocolate labs and my husband had a golden retriever when we started dating and married six months later. I guess we were meant for each other.

Sadly those three have all since crossed the fabled rainbow bridge. We know share our home with twin German Shepherd/Great Pyrenees (about 300 lbs of dog combined), a boxer/chow mix, and a rat terrier.

Expolaris: .

Someday i'll find a nice mommy for her. Maybe she will have a friend for my little buddy. Until then, it's just the 2 of us.
.


She looks like a sweetheart. Some smart, dog-loving lady will come along and appreciate you both at some point.
 
2012-06-20 10:51:15 AM
t1.gstatic.com

Avoid this.
 
2012-06-20 10:51:43 AM

KiwDaWabbit: I have Pekingese and no sex life.

/Not sure what that means.


Female? ultra high maintenance.
Male?

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-06-20 10:51:57 AM
But women who own Chihuahuas, according to respondents, are most likely to "hot" and "dumb"


I think the author of this piece are most likely to dumb.
 
2012-06-20 10:52:48 AM
These two can ruin the moment. We put up the gate and close the door. They seem to have Separation Anxiety and bark and bay during the canoodling.

i266.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-20 10:53:26 AM
"according to respondents, are most likely to "hot" and "dumb" "

Tim Newcomb... Uses words or living. Ugh.
 
2012-06-20 10:54:19 AM

Harry Freakstorm: These two can ruin the moment. We put up the gate and close the door. They seem to have Separation Anxiety and bark and bay during the canoodling.

[i266.photobucket.com image 398x200]


My sister just moved in with someone who has a dog with separation anxiety. Apparently the only way he can successfully bed his GF is if she brings over her own dog to distract his.
 
2012-06-20 10:55:24 AM

Embden.Meyerhof: But women who own Chihuahuas, according to respondents, are most likely to "hot" and "dumb"


I think the author of this piece are most likely to dumb.


While that is an over generalization, I tend to look down on women who carry their little pampered dog around in their purse. A dog is another living creature and shouldn't be a fashion accessory. They were meant to travel around with us in packs by walking. I would label them more "uncaring, unkind, and inconsiderate" than hot or dumb though.
 
2012-06-20 10:56:30 AM
Wait, was my mistake irony or hypocrisy?
 
2012-06-20 10:56:43 AM

Harry Freakstorm: These two can ruin the moment. We put up the gate and close the door. They seem to have Separation Anxiety and bark and bay during the canoodling.

[i266.photobucket.com image 398x200]


My husband got an ice cold, wet lab shnozz on his taint the first time he spent the night at my place. Door was closed after that.
 
2012-06-20 10:57:17 AM

KatjaMouse: Harry Freakstorm: These two can ruin the moment. We put up the gate and close the door. They seem to have Separation Anxiety and bark and bay during the canoodling.

[i266.photobucket.com image 398x200]

My sister just moved in with someone who has a dog with separation anxiety. Apparently the only way he can successfully bed his GF is if she brings over her own dog to distract his.


dogs with separation anxiety can be a mood killer. You shut the door to the bedroom and you get crying. Put them in their crate you get crying. You leave them in the bedroom with you and gods only know what you get.
 
2012-06-20 11:01:02 AM

ModernPrimitive01: You leave them in the bedroom with you and gods only know what you get.


Yeah... Goat Puppy has been known to get all up in our bizniz when we left the door open.
 
2012-06-20 11:02:30 AM
Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered "slimy" or "sketchy" than someone who owns a Siberian Husky

/fixt
 
2012-06-20 11:03:13 AM
My dog would ask me why I was stealing his style.

/rusty is my basset hound. biatches love him
 
2012-06-20 11:03:17 AM
I don't have one.
 
2012-06-20 11:04:26 AM
If i have one more person call my American Bulldog (pure bred) a pit-bull, i'm going to kick them square in the nuts or the box. I cannot take her out in public without somebody commenting on how they have a pit at home, or that they can't believe that I'd bring a pit in public. She isn't a god damned pit bull. Completely different breed. I have nothing against pits, but do like to laugh at the thugs who walk around here wearing their wife beaters, pants around their knees with their boxers (not dog) showing.

I took her out, and a lady made a b-line across the parking lot with her kid to avoid me and my dog - and i heard her mutter that she can't believe that I'd bring a pit out there in public when there are children around.

I'm about to make a scarf or sweater that says 'i'm not a god damned pit pull - shut up and pet me". You'd think the pink leash and pink collar and rapidly wagging tail would be a dead give-away that she's not aggressive.

img.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-20 11:04:44 AM
My dog would probably say alot about my sex life - he always watches us.
 
2012-06-20 11:04:50 AM
When was Time bought out by Cosmo?
 
2012-06-20 11:09:49 AM
Nothing about a leopard catahoula?
 
2012-06-20 11:10:01 AM

JMel: You'd think the pink leash and pink collar and rapidly wagging tail would be a dead give-away that she's not aggressive.


Are you kidding? A wagging tail is a surefire way to spill a beer on the table. That dog is DANGEROUS!
 
2012-06-20 11:10:04 AM

JMel: If i have one more person call my American Bulldog (pure bred) a pit-bull, i'm going to kick them square in the nuts or the box. I cannot take her out in public without somebody commenting on how they have a pit at home, or that they can't believe that I'd bring a pit in public. She isn't a god damned pit bull. Completely different breed. I have nothing against pits, but do like to laugh at the thugs who walk around here wearing their wife beaters, pants around their knees with their boxers (not dog) showing.

I took her out, and a lady made a b-line across the parking lot with her kid to avoid me and my dog - and i heard her mutter that she can't believe that I'd bring a pit out there in public when there are children around.

I'm about to make a scarf or sweater that says 'i'm not a god damned pit pull - shut up and pet me". You'd think the pink leash and pink collar and rapidly wagging tail would be a dead give-away that she's not aggressive.

[img.photobucket.com image 600x450]


Pink does not help. My pit has a neon pink collar with daisies on it, and a pink leash. I'm a 6'2'' 290 guy who runs in football gear all the time. It's an oddly good pairing.

But people still see "OMG PIT" when they see any kind of terrier, bull or othewhys. Mine is a tiny little pit w/ chocolate lab mix but mostly people just see "OMG ITS A PIT". Despite being a runt, she still comes off as that vicious killing machine the news machine has created.

I feel your pain about people crossing the street for us. Just laugh at their foolish ignorance and keep on being awesome.
 
2012-06-20 11:10:35 AM
Pit Bull owners are also 10 times more likely to be considered "slimy" or "sketchy"

FTFTFA
 
2012-06-20 11:11:36 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com

No dogs. I prefer my sweetie Jet. What does that say?
 
2012-06-20 11:12:45 AM
How about one border collie and five cats?
 
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