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(People Magazine)   Now Johnny Depp has even more free time to spend with Tim Burton   (people.com) divider line 70
    More: Sad, Johnny Depp, Vanessa Paradis, Marie Claire  
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19318 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 19 Jun 2012 at 4:54 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



70 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-06-19 04:57:34 PM
meh.

She always looked like Skeletor farked a Gremlin. I'm sure he could do a lot better.
 
2012-06-19 04:59:37 PM
I wonder how he'll ever get over this.

Probably by sleeping on his huge pile of money with many beautiful ladies.
 
2012-06-19 05:00:04 PM
Johnny Depp could be wading in hot and cold running pussy if he wished, I'm not gonna be too sad about this development.
 
2012-06-19 05:01:31 PM
It's gonna be hard on him for a while now.
 
2012-06-19 05:01:48 PM

Raug the Dwarf: meh.

She always looked like Skeletor farked a Gremlin. I'm sure he could do a lot better.


Fark is not your personal 1980s fan fiction erotica site.
 
2012-06-19 05:01:58 PM
damnisteppedinpoo.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-06-19 05:02:42 PM

The_Sponge: Raug the Dwarf: meh.

She always looked like Skeletor farked a Gremlin. I'm sure he could do a lot better.

Fark is not your personal 1980s fan fiction erotica site.


Rule 34. That is all.
 
2012-06-19 05:04:10 PM

busy chillin': It's gonna be hard on him for a while now.


rlv.zcache.com
 
2012-06-19 05:11:35 PM
proabably due to her hygene and bathroom habits. I heard she can really clog up a toilet
 
2012-06-19 05:14:58 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: I wonder how he'll ever get over this.

Probably by sleeping on his huge pile of money with many beautiful ladies.


Pretty much this. Actually, exactly this.
 
2012-06-19 05:16:10 PM

The_Sponge: Raug the Dwarf: meh.

She always looked like Skeletor farked a Gremlin. I'm sure he could do a lot better.

Fark is not your personal 1980s fan fiction erotica site.


Hold on. Let him speak....
 
2012-06-19 05:22:26 PM

theorellior: Johnny Depp could be wading in hot and cold running pussy if he wished, I'm not gonna be too sad about this development.


Ummm... why is it cold? That is a really creepy picture in my head...Kind of throwing up over here.

/Maybe it's cold because it's a corpse...bride
 
2012-06-19 05:32:19 PM
I was meh about him lately, but his cameo in 21 Jump Street had me in tears.
 
2012-06-19 05:32:52 PM
Speaking as a man whose wife would leave him in a heartbeat if she felt there was a shot at getting Mr. Depp I'd just like to say GODDAMMITSOMUCH.
 
2012-06-19 05:33:07 PM
He should do the movie I had an idea for. Its just Johnny Depp and John Cusack sitting around somking cigarettes and talking shiat. It's titled COOL.
 
2012-06-19 05:35:49 PM
Oh no. Poor Johnny Depp.

I bet it will be MINUTES before he can get laid again. His poor cock might start to unprune from the past two decades it's spent pickled in pussy juice.
 
2012-06-19 05:37:00 PM

Onkel Buck: He should do the movie I had an idea for. Its just Johnny Depp and John Cusack sitting around somking cigarettes and talking shiat. It's titled COOL.


John Cusack, is that you???
 
2012-06-19 05:38:29 PM
Edward Bachelorhands
 
2012-06-19 05:40:07 PM

Zombie DJ: I was meh about him lately, but his cameo in 21 Jump Street had me in tears.


He had a cameo in the movie? shiat, not I have to rent it.
 
2012-06-19 05:40:42 PM
NOW that is
 
2012-06-19 05:45:32 PM
Please, no more Burton and Depp team ups. None, stop it.

As for Depp being single. Oh damn. If I had tonnes of cash, fame and a huge house I wouldn't a long time girlfriend or a wife. I'd sleep with so many women that man kind would erect a momument to me with the name of every woman I slept with, kind of like the Vietnam Memorial, only it would just be titled "Read this list, your mom is probably on it."
 
2012-06-19 05:46:40 PM
yup, this headline is pretty much exactly what I thought when i read this news.

well, that and WOOHOO, he's available!

I dont think i'm "bag of antlers"-y enough for him though.
 
2012-06-19 05:49:05 PM
As a fellow Farker said in a different thread, 'she's got that huge gap in her teeth, she must 'do things' for him.' Our little johnny might be some kind of kinkster with a dark side. But I'm sure that won't scathe the hoards of young puss puss that will be stampeding towards him.
 
2012-06-19 06:01:07 PM
Dammit now my suspicions that he is after my future wife Amber Heard are confirmed.

/she will be mine, oh yes she will be mine.
 
2012-06-19 06:03:38 PM
FTFA: an insider told PEOPLE about their crumbling relationship, "It's so sad."

Gee whiz. Thanks "insider"!!!
 
2012-06-19 06:15:20 PM

TravisBickle62: Dude got paid $50 million to do the last Pirates movie, even after taxes that's a crapload of money.

He can go on a World Pussy Tour.


He also gets a share of the profits. $350 million to date.
 
2012-06-19 06:19:28 PM
The SAD tag has never been more appropriate. I imagine a lot of people will be taking a sick day tomorrow.
 
2012-06-19 06:19:34 PM
I think this guy is willing to jump in to help her get over the relationship.

img.thesun.co.uk
 
2012-06-19 06:41:00 PM
Oh, crap. Now that guy is going to make Clooney and DiCaprio look like monks.
 
2012-06-19 06:52:06 PM
I hear Lindsay Lohan is free.

Well not 'free'... you still gotta buy her a vodak and rub cocaine on her hoohaw.

cdn2-b.examiner.com
 
2012-06-19 06:57:01 PM
Trouble in Paradis?
 
2012-06-19 07:46:52 PM

skinink: Edward Bachelorhands


More like Edward Fingerbang.

Yeah, baby!
 
2012-06-19 08:16:25 PM
I'm in no rush to bang Johnny Depp, sharp knees and all.
 
2012-06-19 08:25:35 PM
Recent picture, I expect Vanessa won't be on the market long.
Copy/paste ya lazy bastiches
http://i2.listal.com/image/3792747/600full-vanessa-paradis.jpg
And another.
img2.bdbphotos.com
 
2012-06-19 08:26:02 PM
Am I more surprised simply because he has a son named Jack or is it because it's not Gonzo?

/Does Jack tweet?
 
2012-06-19 08:31:14 PM

Raug the Dwarf: meh.

She always looked like Skeletor farked a Gremlin. I'm sure he could do a lot better.


upload.wikimedia.org

Still waiting for Skeletor's call.
 
2012-06-19 08:31:15 PM
She could date Greico.
 
2012-06-19 08:38:40 PM

BalugaJoe: She could date Greico.


I bet she could save a bunch of money by switching to Greico, too
 
2012-06-19 08:55:57 PM

LesserEvil: I think this guy is willing to jump in to help her get over the relationship.

[img.thesun.co.uk image 532x560]


dtdstudios.com

Yikes! Now I understand why he wears so much make up in his films.
 
2012-06-19 09:15:12 PM
Maybe he'll get back together with Richard Grieco.

Did anyone do a Richard Grieco joke yet?
 
2012-06-19 09:34:29 PM
Dem Teeth

cdn.wwtdd.com
 
2012-06-19 09:41:23 PM
Dem Teeth

blimey, is she British?
 
2012-06-19 09:53:21 PM
cdn.wwtdd.com
screencrave.com

Case closed.
 
2012-06-19 10:03:51 PM
Maybe Depp and Burton will spend so much time together, their relationship with blossom into fluttery gothic love.

And then Helena Bonham Carter will be mine!
 
2012-06-19 10:19:28 PM
Where will he hang his gigantic hats now!?!?!
 
2012-06-19 10:43:30 PM

Balchinian: [cdn.wwtdd.com image 450x856]
[screencrave.com image 570x343]

Case closed.


zomg taht's not right
 
2012-06-19 10:50:07 PM
Did she dump him because of that hat? I think that would be justified.
 
2012-06-19 11:17:33 PM

jaytkay: Balchinian: [cdn.wwtdd.com image 450x856]
[screencrave.com image 570x343]

Case closed.

zomg taht's not right


I was just thinking that SHE looked like a Tim Burton creation...

Oh, and the Mad Hatter's teeth should be greenish from the mercury.
 
2012-06-19 11:17:52 PM
Let's make this a 'girls who would do Depp given half a chance' thread.

So post any female you think of.
 
2012-06-19 11:22:43 PM
As a dude going through a break up, i gotta say to all those who have no sympathy because he can get any girl that he wants...it has nothing to do with what you can get and everything to do with what you wont get again....


/off to cry myself to sleep.
//bawwww thread?
 
2012-06-19 11:35:06 PM

optional: And then Helena Bonham Carter will be mine!


NOT SO FAST BUB.
 
2012-06-20 12:07:33 AM
I'm just going to say this: see "The Girl on the Bridge".
 
2012-06-20 12:16:07 AM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: I wonder how he'll ever get over this.

Probably by sleeping on his huge pile of money hats with many beautiful ladies.


FTFY
 
2012-06-20 01:39:03 AM

thecpt: theorellior: Johnny Depp could be wading in hot and cold running pussy if he wished, I'm not gonna be too sad about this development.

Ummm... why is it cold? That is a really creepy picture in my head...Kind of throwing up over here.

/Maybe it's cold because it's a corpse...bride


It's only creepy at first, but then the cold and stillness becomes this beautiful thing. It's really an amazing experience.
 
2012-06-20 01:58:55 AM

TravisBickle62: He has a lot of lines on his face


Ed Finnerty: Yikes! Now I understand why he wears so much make up in his films.


Wow.. I found something too obscure on Fark, I guess.

Then again, the movie was a flop in so many ways.
 
2012-06-20 04:40:00 AM
I seriously do not understand the attraction of someone being gap toothed. One media outlet was gushing over "Vanessa's lovely gap-toothed grin" and I was like, really?

/I don't understand Japanese girls infatuation with Ferengi teeth either.
 
2012-06-20 06:02:16 AM

Ed Finnerty: Yikes! Now I understand why he wears so much make up in his films.


terribleanalogies.com


Read LesserEvil's caption. Look closely at the picture. If you're still not clear on who that isn't, do a TinEye search.

/Sorry to hear they're kaput
//That guy is gonna get so much trim
 
2012-06-20 06:50:08 AM
Does this mean his next movie project will be "Paradis Lost"?
 
2012-06-20 07:56:55 AM
I am more than willing to go comfort Johnny Depp in this time of need.

Farkettes, the line forms behind me.
 
2012-06-20 08:26:39 AM

Cosmoboy: As a dude going through a break up, i gotta say to all those who have no sympathy because he can get any girl that he wants...it has nothing to do with what you can get and everything to do with what you wont get again....


/off to cry myself to sleep.
//bawwww thread?


Basically this. While I know my recent breakup was a good thing intellectually, emotionally I'm still upset. In particular I'm upset because the relationship, at least on her side, basically just evaporated. I'd imagine something like that happened with Depp.
 
2012-06-20 08:37:44 AM
He'll probably end up with one of the Olsen trolls.
 
2012-06-20 08:59:01 AM
Where's that old pic I had.. (flips through my download folder) Ah..

homepage.mac.com
 
2012-06-20 11:56:33 AM

Cosmoboy: As a dude going through a break up, i gotta say to all those who have no sympathy because he can get any girl that he wants...it has nothing to do with what you can get and everything to do with what you wont get again....


/off to cry myself to sleep.
//bawwww thread?


This. My girlfriend and I broke up after 7 years 2 months ago and it still hurts -- and EVERYBODY that knows we're broke up is completely shocked and nobody saw it coming, even me. It was an amicable break-up because we both need to get some priorities in our lives straightened out, but man I miss everything about her all the time -- even the stuff I hated. I know once I bed a new girl that will help a lot, but I still can't help but to think about my ex all the time and it sucks :(

/no, she didn't cheat on me
//will cry in my beer tonight
 
2012-06-20 12:24:39 PM

Ashtrey: Let's make this a 'girls who would do Depp given half a chance' thread.

So post any female you think of.


No way, not happening, not even with someone elses puss puss. He basically has the same dental hygiene habits as saber gapped tooth tiny with a side of next day alcohol seeping from his sweat glands smell. BIG PASS!
 
2012-06-20 12:46:43 PM

Peekachicka: Ashtrey: Let's make this a 'girls who would do Depp given half a chance' thread.

So post any female you think of.

No way, not happening, not even with someone elses puss puss. He basically has the same dental hygiene habits as saber gapped tooth tiny with a side of next day alcohol seeping from his sweat glands smell. BIG PASS!


Studwoman69?
 
2012-06-20 01:45:19 PM

Mr.Poops: Cosmoboy: As a dude going through a break up, i gotta say to all those who have no sympathy because he can get any girl that he wants...it has nothing to do with what you can get and everything to do with what you wont get again....


/off to cry myself to sleep.
//bawwww thread?

This. My girlfriend and I broke up after 7 years 2 months ago and it still hurts -- and EVERYBODY that knows we're broke up is completely shocked and nobody saw it coming, even me. It was an amicable break-up because we both need to get some priorities in our lives straightened out, but man I miss everything about her all the time -- even the stuff I hated. I know once I bed a new girl that will help a lot, but I still can't help but to think about my ex all the time and it sucks :(

/no, she didn't cheat on me
//will cry in my beer tonight


Yup. Ours was amicable too. We live a hundred miles away from each other, she thought it was an insurmountable distance. She's working a new job and we both work weekends and never see each other. There's a possibility that after the summer work is over we could shake things out, but it's hard to be hopeful...
 
2012-06-20 06:46:40 PM

100 Watt Walrus: Read LesserEvil's caption. Look closely at the picture. If you're still not clear on who that isn't, do a TinEye search.

/Sorry to hear they're kaput
//That guy is gonna get so much trim


Thank you. Had to Tin Eye it to figure it out.

I learned something new today. Yet I feel like I got ripped off.
 
2012-06-20 09:34:54 PM

Ed Finnerty: 100 Watt Walrus: Read LesserEvil's caption. Look closely at the picture. If you're still not clear on who that isn't, do a TinEye search.

/Sorry to hear they're kaput
//That guy is gonna get so much trim

Thank you. Had to Tin Eye it to figure it out.

I learned something new today. Yet I feel like I got ripped off.


Clearly, Tim and Eric's "Billion Dollar Movie" wasn't a hit with Farkers.

/For good reason
 
2012-06-21 11:48:17 AM
Eh, he'll be taken again in no time. Sorry ladies.
 
2012-06-21 02:00:30 PM
Count me out. I never got on the Johnny Depp bandwagon. Not a fan of slight and scruffy, fey and offbeat. And Vanessa Paradis is one of those typical Frenchwomen who are very slender and self-assured, yet aren't necessarily any better looking than average.

Nathan Fillion should be sleeping with one eye open, though, if I ever get within grabbing range of him.
 
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