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(New York Daily News)   Caption Alec Baldwin's encounter with a photographer   ( ) divider line
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10302 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jun 2012 at 3:08 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2012-06-19 11:52:22 PM  
Goddam m*th%er f3ck^r get out of my f(ck&ing way you pos low life scumbag sh%tpuke.
2012-06-20 01:33:58 AM  
2012-06-20 03:12:41 AM  
"It's YOUR MOVE in Words With Friends!"
2012-06-20 03:14:11 AM  
You've got something on your face. It's my fist.
2012-06-20 03:17:03 AM  
"No, you may NOT taste my Schweddy Balls."
2012-06-20 03:20:41 AM  
How many times do I have to tell you assholes that the right side is my good side!
2012-06-20 03:21:10 AM  
I said sepia tone!
2012-06-20 03:24:10 AM  
"Third prize is your FIRED."
2012-06-20 03:27:32 AM  
You can't out act me kid, don't even try it.
2012-06-20 03:27:34 AM  
You fat little pig!!!
2012-06-20 03:33:04 AM  
For the last f@cken' time, I wasn't in the Usual Suspects!
2012-06-20 03:40:12 AM  
I'm going to shove you, you're going to sue, win, retire, and stop taking my f*cking picture.
2012-06-20 04:00:49 AM  
This isn't madness. this is hollywooooooodddd!!!
2012-06-20 04:29:23 AM  
For the last G*DD*MN time, I had NOTHING to do with Sum of All Fears!
2012-06-20 04:32:35 AM

on AB's desk
2012-06-20 05:26:45 AM  
Run damn you!
Oh wait.
Umm... Today is a good day to die!
Aww fark!
Meet your meat!!
2012-06-20 05:42:40 AM  
"Affleck? Affleck? Shut your whore mouth! Ford nailed Jack Ryan!"
2012-06-20 06:12:32 AM  
Me and my dad pants are going to KICK THE F**K OUTTA YOU!
2012-06-20 06:22:22 AM  
I'm not fat, I'm just BIG BONED
2012-06-20 06:47:29 AM  
Kiss me, you romantic fool, you.
2012-06-20 06:50:28 AM  
Heil Alec!
2012-06-20 06:55:55 AM  
Where's my $2?
2012-06-20 07:06:23 AM  
Goddamittohellandback, I'm the only one who can call my daughter a worthless little slut.
2012-06-20 07:33:31 AM  
2012-06-20 08:11:51 AM  
I suck and no one cares about pictures of me anyway!
2012-06-20 08:16:56 AM  
I warned you - SHUT UP about 'The Marrying Man' !!!
2012-06-20 08:21:43 AM  
I told you a million times... Always take a shot of my good side. Cause you do not want to see my bad side again!
2012-06-20 08:22:39 AM  
$29.99 for a simple picture of me at Disney... Are you crazy?!
2012-06-20 08:50:25 AM  
I said .."What's in your wallet you sonofabiatch?!"
2012-06-20 08:55:28 AM  
I'm Alec Baldwin and I'm a douchebag!
2012-06-20 09:00:13 AM  
When will you bastards get the point that I'm only funny and nice on TV!?!
2012-06-20 09:07:40 AM  
"Let me tell you something...I AM God. And this side show is over."
2012-06-20 09:13:49 AM  
Don't call me Stephen! Don't call me Billie! Don't call me Daniel! Don't call me Alec! Oh wait. Call me Alec.
2012-06-20 09:15:51 AM  
Your f stop is too low for this light level. What speed are you shooting? 400?
2012-06-20 09:16:34 AM  
Photographer: Cat Claw Defense! Meow!
2012-06-20 09:20:56 AM  
"Oh, yeah? Well some things in here don't react well to YOU!"
2012-06-20 09:29:19 AM  
You know what? fark the paparazzi. They'd end up punching someone too if they were being hounded day and night everywhere they went.
2012-06-20 09:36:15 AM  
Phil's Foliage Photo Blog

This morning I hit the streets early trying to get an early morning shot of the roses over by Bank of America. The gardeners there, I believe it's still Forever Green from Fairmont, are doing an awesome job and it shows. Some of the roses are coming up magnificently and I wanted to get some snaps before the morning dew falls off them.

I got there bright and early and I was rewarded with a perfect bed of yellow, pink and red roses. All perfectly maintained and beautiful. I started snapping some shots of them and was planning a spectacular photo layout for the blog when the bushes started rustling. Suddenly these two, er, ladies of the evening burst out of the bushes. Calling them ladies is a stretch by the way. They looked pretty thin and very beaten up. They screamed at me and ran away so I ignored then and went back to getting my shots of the roses.

I was so engrossed with the beauty of the flowers that I didn't notice him until he was right upon me. He must have been in the bushes with the ladies. Suddenly, this 6 foot drunken Irish guy is at my throat yelling about a guy named Papa Rozzi. He was covered in vomit and semen and his breath was 100 proof. I just tried to get away from him. His breath alone could have killed me.

I yelled "Hey" and it just made him madder. "Fey? Tina Fey saved my career!" he snorted and was at my throat again. "Tina Fey is an angel!"

Well, readers, the only reason he didn't kill me with his disgusting breath or otherwise is that his pants fell down and he tripped on them. His girlfriends came back and were screaming at him about the money he owed them and he directed his rage at them. I used this opportunity to escape.

Thanks to fellow foliage friend Danny for getting a shot of the attack. No more morning shoots for me! Next week, I'm going to a safer location for some photos of flowers. There's a deserted house in downtown Detroit that has some absolutely beautiful flowering vines growing on it. I should be a lot safer there.
2012-06-20 09:59:29 AM  
2012-06-20 10:51:49 AM  
That's a clown camera bro!
2012-06-20 11:57:01 AM  
2012-06-20 12:41:17 PM  
Well bust my buffers!
2012-06-20 02:22:38 PM  

brantgoose: Photo of Alex Baldwin mistaking a photographer for daughter Ireland Baldwin.
When he realized his error, he apologized gracefully and left to biatch slap his daughter.

2012-06-21 12:05:46 AM  
"Listen you dumbass... its spelt F _ A _ R _ K"
2012-06-21 12:58:35 PM  
I said ... what do you have in YOUR wallet?
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