If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Huffington Post)   Five misconceptions about alien life. "The idea that they've come for breeding purposes is more akin to wishful thinking by members of the audience who don't have good social lives"   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 168
    More: Interesting, renewable resources, Seth Shostak, IEEE Spectrum, Nibiru, earthlings, social animals, Christopher Columbus, Copernicus  
•       •       •

8688 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jun 2012 at 11:41 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



168 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-17 10:43:47 AM
I doubt seriously they'd come to mate with us, but some of the others seem like pretty broad assumptions
 
2012-06-17 10:53:30 AM
Speculating about what hypothetical aliens might hypothetically do if they land here in some unknown future based on no knowledge of them whatsoever? At least at the end of a real life circle jerk, the participants have a little something to show for it.
 
2012-06-17 11:11:04 AM
all of this has happened before....
 
2012-06-17 11:11:07 AM
img39.imageshack.us
 
2012-06-17 11:13:59 AM
They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.
 
2012-06-17 11:18:48 AM

GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.


Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet
 
2012-06-17 11:38:50 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet


If they were a decaying remnant of their civilization escaping with the last resources they might.
 
2012-06-17 11:46:24 AM

GAT_00: MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet

If they were a decaying remnant of their civilization escaping with the last resources they might.


Ya know... that might make a good plot for a SyFy channel movie

/or maybe even a summer blockbuster with the right star
//I wonder what Adam Sandler is up to?
 
2012-06-17 11:50:12 AM
5 things they desperately don't want you to believe about alien life.
 
2012-06-17 11:51:01 AM
More likely they'd want to hire us as cheap foreign labor.
 
2012-06-17 11:51:16 AM
Oh Come On, do I really have to post this? No but I'm gonna anyway!

i.qkme.me

Oh and they forgot the 1 biggest misconception, They aren't REAL!!!
 
2012-06-17 11:51:41 AM

J. Frank Parnell: 5 things they desperately don't want you to believe about alien life.


/ftfm
//quitting coffee is hard
 
2012-06-17 11:52:17 AM
Wouldn't a list about misconceptions about a subject we have zero hard evidence about itself be a misconception?

No, they wouldn't come explicitly to breed, but it's not unreasonable that some visitors might be sexually adventurous...if they have sex in the first place.
 
2012-06-17 11:52:44 AM
So no tentacle pron for reals?
 
2012-06-17 11:53:13 AM
That we are smart enough to detect and immediately recognize alien communication.
 
2012-06-17 11:53:53 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are



We just had this thread a short while ago. Let me repeat what I wrote:

Everything we've learned about life and the Universe so far points to the fact that other life-forms are constrained by the same chemicals, forces and basic physical realities as us. It stands to reason that since multi-cellular life's purpose on Earth is to propagate itself by consuming other life, it's likely the mandate for multi-cellular space-faring species also.

Of course, I have no data pooled from worlds other than this one so these are all big assumptions. But they're damn good ones.

There's nothing an alien race could or would want to learn from us that they don't already know or care about. If they come here for any reason at all, it's because our planet has lots of delicious resources. And any extraterrestrial race technologically advanced enough for interstellar travel is so far beyond our level that they would probably regard us the way we would regard a hornet nest in a fallow field we're about to plow: Annoying, insignificant - and in the way.
 
2012-06-17 11:54:06 AM

Molavian: More likely they'd want to hire us as cheap foreign labor.


We'll make great pets.
 
2012-06-17 11:54:53 AM
Okay, reading that list showed me that it is retarded. All of those ideas have been explored in science fiction. If the author had gotten his head out of his pompous ass, he would have known that.
 
2012-06-17 11:55:22 AM
Fark you, Subby. It's the only way I'm gonna get some. Let me dream!

:-p
 
2012-06-17 11:55:48 AM

Psycoholic_Slag: Molavian: More likely they'd want to hire us as cheap foreign labor.

We'll make great pets.


the alien lib-o-rats will try to stop them from enslaving us, but then they'll be stupid enough to give us voting rights and we'll vote for the alien republicans dooming us all
 
2012-06-17 11:56:08 AM
www.dvdlink.ca
 
2012-06-17 11:56:11 AM

LoneWolf343: Okay, reading that list showed me that it is retarded. All of those ideas have been explored in science fiction. If the author had gotten his head out of his pompous ass, he would have known that.


Perhaps he is an asexual alien having sex right now?
 
2012-06-17 11:56:58 AM
Unlike the common beliefs, aliens are not attracted to the sexy women, but instead find overweight unkemp men very sexy and abduct them all from Earth. Take that, lonely overweight unsexed guys!
 
2012-06-17 11:58:23 AM
So, the guys waiting for Xev Bellringer are a bunch of Stanley Tweedles?

Makes sense.
 
2012-06-17 11:58:52 AM

LoneWolf343: Okay, reading that list showed me that it is retarded. All of those ideas have been explored in science fiction. If the author had gotten his head out of his pompous ass, he would have known that.


It came from the Huffington Post, of course it's pompous and retarded. Here's a picture because it's my picture week.

files.g4tv.com
 
2012-06-17 12:00:37 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-06-17 12:01:06 PM
One might even say them speaking in such absolutes when they supposedly have no evidence of anything is sloppy science.
 
2012-06-17 12:01:17 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet

If they were a decaying remnant of their civilization escaping with the last resources they might.

Ya know... that might make a good plot for a SyFy channel movie

/or maybe even a summer blockbuster with the right star
//I wonder what Adam Sandler is up to?


I've actually thought out this storyline quite a bit. And I've read at least one variant of that story. Building Harlequin's Moon, though it barely qualifies.
 
2012-06-17 12:01:34 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet


Or, they come here to WAAAAAAAAAGHHH!!!!
 
2012-06-17 12:05:39 PM

Ishkur: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are


We just had this thread a short while ago. Let me repeat what I wrote:

Everything we've learned about life and the Universe so far points to the fact that other life-forms are constrained by the same chemicals, forces and basic physical realities as us. It stands to reason that since multi-cellular life's purpose on Earth is to propagate itself by consuming other life, it's likely the mandate for multi-cellular space-faring species also.

Of course, I have no data pooled from worlds other than this one so these are all big assumptions. But they're damn good ones.

There's nothing an alien race could or would want to learn from us that they don't already know or care about. If they come here for any reason at all, it's because our planet has lots of delicious resources. And any extraterrestrial race technologically advanced enough for interstellar travel is so far beyond our level that they would probably regard us the way we would regard a hornet nest in a fallow field we're about to plow: Annoying, insignificant - and in the way.


The problem, as I see it, is that all these assumptions are based on Human behavior because 1) we have absolutely zero data or experience with anything else, and 2) a failure of imagination. Basically, the same general things that limit us as a species, but I digress.
The galaxy is an awfully big place with chemicals and resources scattered far and wide. Why would a species need to travel such incredible distances just to acquire resources?
 
2012-06-17 12:07:16 PM
In all seriousness, if we were invaded by an alien species that 1.- Cares only about fighting 2.- Reproduces when it dies 3.- Has instinctive knowledge of how technology works and 3.- Creates a chain reaction that causes millions of its species to go on a killing frenzy... We'd be screwed.
 
2012-06-17 12:07:45 PM
Maybe they won't make the first move, but "No means No" doesn't necessarily translate well to Andromedan. Let's get em boys!
 
2012-06-17 12:08:40 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: I doubt seriously they'd come to mate with us, but some of the others seem like pretty broad assumptions


Speak for yourself.

I'm dead sexy.
 
2012-06-17 12:09:00 PM
We don't have any resources that couldn't be found elsewhere by a spacefaring race. Really the only reason that aliens would go to the trouble to come here would be evangelism...

They'll show up very nicely if conservatively dressed, and ask "Have you heard the Good News about Qzretyu?"

Either that or a xenophobic pogrom.
 
2012-06-17 12:09:53 PM
If they don't want to mate with us, then why all the probing?
 
2012-06-17 12:11:37 PM
"For some of you this will mean much less breeding. For me, much much more." - CBG
 
2012-06-17 12:12:15 PM

GAT_00: MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: MaudlinMutantMollusk: GAT_00: They won't come in peace

Yeah, this is one of those that you have to think through. As I figure, any species powerful to get here, since best as we can tell that is very expensive, difficult and time consuming, is doing it with a specific purpose: they want what is here.

Which assumes they'd be as stupid, shortsighted, and greedy as we are

/if that were the case, they'd never get here
//just like we'll never get off of this planet

If they were a decaying remnant of their civilization escaping with the last resources they might.

Ya know... that might make a good plot for a SyFy channel movie

/or maybe even a summer blockbuster with the right star
//I wonder what Adam Sandler is up to?

I've actually thought out this storyline quite a bit. And I've read at least one variant of that story. Building Harlequin's Moon, though it barely qualifies.


It was kinda the premise of the tv show The Event.
 
2012-06-17 12:12:34 PM
I just assume everyone I meet wants to mate with me. Why would aliens be any different?

/anyway - they took my jerbs - they could at least fark me
 
2012-06-17 12:13:46 PM
Aliens will not want for resources. Any species with the know how to get here would also have to know how to harvest energy from solar orbital photovoltaics. They will not want to elements, there about one earth's total volume of H20 in the Oort cloud, there is nothing here that cannot be obtained locally for much less effort. Their drives and desires will be even more alien to us than their appearance.
 
2012-06-17 12:14:14 PM

Joshudan: If they don't want to mate with us, then why all the probing?


What you don't know about this particular species doing the probing, is that they're all studying to become proctologists.
 
2012-06-17 12:14:23 PM

maxheck: We don't have any resources that couldn't be found elsewhere by a spacefaring race. Really the only reason that aliens would go to the trouble to come here would be evangelism...

They'll show up very nicely if conservatively dressed, and ask "Have you heard the Good News about Qzretyu?"

Either that or a xenophobic pogrom.


Or maybe they want to refuel their ship and don't want to haul around a refinery.
 
2012-06-17 12:14:33 PM
i45.tinypic.com
 
2012-06-17 12:15:04 PM
The biggest misconception is that the aliens will be on a par with us in size. They will be in the range of 4ft to 10ft in height, so our popular press seems to think Pffft, they don't even know what a foot is. The most likely alien we will first encounter will be sized less than a an inch, more likely a germ. We've already met them, I'm sure. They died before we recognized them. the whole space fleet, bent on destruction and annihilation of our species, was swallowed by a small dog

/RIP Doug Adams
//we need to go there, first
///
 
2012-06-17 12:15:08 PM
Wait, do people (other than crazies) think aliens want to mate with us? Why would they? How would they?
 
2012-06-17 12:15:12 PM
"Think about how well we breed with other species on Earth, and they have DNA. It would be like trying to breed with an oak tree."

Well, I have been accused of having a stick up my ass...
 
2012-06-17 12:15:33 PM

bootman: Aliens will not want for resources. Any species with the know how to get here would also have to know how to harvest energy from solar orbital photovoltaics. They will not want to elements, there about one earth's total volume of H20 in the Oort cloud, there is nothing here that cannot be obtained locally for much less effort. Their drives and desires will be even more alien to us than their appearance.


Therefore, the WAAAAAAAAGH!!! is a more logical reason to come here.

There is no conquest, no resource-harvesting, only the will and drive to fight some humies.
 
2012-06-17 12:17:20 PM
threadjackistan:

maxheck: We don't have any resources that couldn't be found elsewhere by a spacefaring race. Really the only reason that aliens would go to the trouble to come here would be evangelism...

They'll show up very nicely if conservatively dressed, and ask "Have you heard the Good News about Qzretyu?"

Either that or a xenophobic pogrom.

Or maybe they want to refuel their ship and don't want to haul around a refinery.


A petroleum-fired spaceship would be fun to watch... I think it would have to make a putt-putt sound even in a vacuum.

Or are you talking about something more exotic like using Earthlings to make an antimatter factory / giant pusher laser, something like that?
 
2012-06-17 12:17:35 PM
It's hard enough for humans to successfully achieve coitus with the larger members of Class Mammalia here on Earth, any alien species is gonna be even more incompatible in their courtship rituals, sexual arousal, genitalia and method of copulation. You might as well fantasize about sexing horseshoe crabs, groupers or giant squids.
 
2012-06-17 12:17:38 PM
Just keep a lot of Windex handy. They hate Windex.

/definitely obscure
//prove me wrong
 
2012-06-17 12:18:02 PM

bootman: Aliens will not want for resources. Any species with the know how to get here would also have to know how to harvest energy from solar orbital photovoltaics. They will not want to elements, there about one earth's total volume of H20 in the Oort cloud, there is nothing here that cannot be obtained locally for much less effort. Their drives and desires will be even more alien to us than their appearance.


Maybe they need some sort of messy fuel, not h2o, but some weird radioactive blend of crap that is messy and requires bulky refineries that take lots of upkeep and don't want to get their hands messy?

"But they'll be super advanced!" Unless they can change the laws of physics, they aren't gonna want to haul a huge fuel refinery around with them.
 
Displayed 50 of 168 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report