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(Some spontn80)   Fifth year in a row: What would you say to your Daddy today if you could?   (dangrigor.com) divider line 503
    More: Followup, fifth year  
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4070 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jun 2012 at 12:49 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-17 03:30:36 AM  
Everything I needed to say, I said in the eulogy. I wish I would have said it more while you were here, but I know you knew. We were too similar to get too sappy.

I can't imagine the pain and suffering you endured for 2/3s of your life with that goddamned disease. Thanks for the lessons we learned watching you battle, even though I'd give them all up for you to have lived a better, longer life.

I send mom roses on your anniversary in June every year - half red and half yellow, just like you did on the days my brother and I were born. Brother and I do my best to take care of her, just like we promised we would. Wouldn't think of having it any other way.

I wouldn't have you back in the shape you were in - you endured more than any one person ever should - but I wouldn't mind just a quick reprieve for you to meet brother's son. Seemed like being a grandpa was the one thing you really wanted and never got.

Love you and miss you always, Dad. Laughter, smiles, and tears, I'll never stop trying to live up to your lessons.
 
2012-06-17 03:31:25 AM  
Who?
 
2012-06-17 03:34:56 AM  
Dear Father, I'm sorry you married a defective woman who could not have children, thus forcing you to adopt a baby, born from an un-married slut instead of the one you would have formed in your holy christian marriage. I'm sorry your a miserable sack of crap, who thinks the world is against you despite the fact that you were born into a loving happy financial stable family and have no reason to the miserable POS you are. I don't understand why you are like this, why were you an abuse hateful fark your whole life. Why did you beat mom and me, why did you spend ever minute you could being as hateful to both of us as you could? Your parents are good people, since leaving the cult church I have gotten to meet them and your siblings. They are all good people, loving charitable people who live by Jesus example and help their fellow man, not spending every minute judging every person as a sinful fark while holding themselves up to be perfect and sinless.

Mostly I'm want to know why, after 8 years, you contacted me. Someone told you I had cancer and that I might not be able to beat it. Why couldn't you just keep shunning me for being a backslid Christian and leave it at that. You just had to write that letter, didn't you. And you knew I would read it, that little piece of hope that I clung to that you might want to mend to bridge between us. You used it to scream about my past, my being born to an unmarried slut, that my baby died shortly after birth and it was all my fault because I must have sinned, the miscarriages before my daughter's birth, my divorce from my husband and my leaving the church - that this was all my punishments and that's why I had cancer. I read it and after I was done, I realized something, you finally did it, you finally destroyed what little love I had left for you. You sent two more letter since then, they went right into the trash. I spend years drinking away the misery of my childhood thanks to you. I've stared down death before, tried to end it all in the depths of my drunken misery, cancer was a cakewalk to beat after years of that. Thanks to you, there will always be a piece of me that is sad, that haunts me. But unlike, you that was given everything and farked it up and in turn gave me nothing but misery, I'm going to have the happiness in life I can. I have have friends, have created a new family of your parents and siblings plus the biological sisters my mother had after me. I do works of charity for my fellow man, hobbies and live a quiet peaceful life in my own way. Not to spite you, but because I want to, because it is who I am. But understand this, I do forgive you, but I don't love you anymore and don't you ever try to contact me for anything. You could live to 100, since you wrote that letter, you are dead to me.
 
2012-06-17 03:35:30 AM  
Thanks for teaching me technical problem solving.

Also wish he had seen my move from the hard left to the middle right that he espoused.

/20 years next week since he died
//Ron Dahlquist 1/21/1936 - 6/22/1992
///St. Paul, Minnesota (a Rice Streeter)
 
2012-06-17 03:39:47 AM  
It'll be six years this August since you died. Sometimes it hits me all over again like it just happened yesterday. Did you know that I called your cell phone for a week after you died? Just to hear your voice.

When Mom drove up to Maryland last year, she got a call on her cell - the caller ID showed your phone number. She answered it and it was some guy who had your old number. *His* phone rang - only once - and showed Mom as the caller ID. Was that you?

I wish you could see your grandsons. Michael has come so far - he's graduating high school next year - and Paul is my little changeling. You should hear the thoughts and ideas that these two amazing kids have.

I miss you so much. I miss being able to call you because I can't remember how long to cook the steak. I miss talking football and music. I miss the sound of your voice and the sight of your smile. I love you so very much for everything you've done for me, but most of all for never making me feel like less of a daughter just because we weren't blood. You were always my dad.
 
2012-06-17 03:43:20 AM  
This will be the first Father's Day since my Dad passed away last August. The big event of the day will be me and my Mom going out to the cemetery to put new flowers in the vases by the headstone.

My biggest fear since my Dad passed away is that if he is out there somewhere as an angel/spirit/ghost and can somehow see or know what I am doing, that he is very disappointed with me and how I live my life. If I could, I would tell him how sorry I am that I turned out this way and that it isn't his fault. :-(
 
2012-06-17 03:44:26 AM  
It doesn't bother me at all that you treated me like shiat, but for the way you treated my mother, I'll kill you if I ever see you again.
 
2012-06-17 03:47:22 AM  
Holy crap. I know I'm generally pretty spoiled, but after reading some of these stories, it's clear I'm even more spoiled than I thought.

A long time ago, we were doing pretty well; my dad had several businesses, we had a nice house in the suburbs, and all three kids in my family were going to private school. Then, the bottom fell out. We lost the house (on which my parents had been paying for years) and had to sell everything in it to finance a move across the country. We were only allowed to keep what we could fit in a small U-haul trailer. Two parents, three kids, and a St. Bernard in a station wagon.

When we finally got where we were going, the job my dad had lined up let him go after three months, and we lived just above the poverty line for many years. To make ends meet, my dad was working two (and sometimes three) jobs, while all he got from his kids was complaints about how life sucked. Things have improved, since then, but they never got back to where they once were.

I don't know what I would have done, if I had been in his position. I certainly wouldn't have handled it as well as he did.

For my entire life, whenever I really needed him - whenever any of us really needed him - he was there. Every. Single. Time. For that, I guess I'd like to say "Thanks."
 
2012-06-17 03:50:55 AM  
dear dad, couldn't you have pretended once in a while that i wasn't just a life destroying mistake? i spent my entire life being sorry that i was born, and i don't know that i will ever 'recover', but i still love you and i'll pretend that you might have loved me, too.

just in case.
 
2012-06-17 03:52:13 AM  
You have two beautiful grandchildren.
 
2012-06-17 03:58:11 AM  
Jesus. I'm not sure which stories are harder to read, the farked up ones or the sappy awesome ones.

Had the same experience in the Morher's Day thread. I should stay out of these damn things.
 
2012-06-17 03:58:34 AM  

kwirlkarphys: dear dad, couldn't you have pretended once in a while that i wasn't just a life destroying mistake? i spent my entire life being sorry that i was born, and i don't know that i will ever 'recover', but i still love you and i'll pretend that you might have loved me, too.

just in case.


s-s-s-sister?
 
2012-06-17 04:02:21 AM  
Dear Daddy Moran --

Threaten me again with that butcher knife. Come on, I dare ya.

Love,

Your son.
 
2012-06-17 04:08:34 AM  
Can you quit being an ass?
Did you really have to tell your friends "YES! He's not gay!!" ? We have a lot of mutual friends.
shiat like that is why I don't trust you or share much with you.
 
2012-06-17 04:09:55 AM  
Dad,

I like my Budweiser, dammit.
 
2012-06-17 04:11:09 AM  
You helped me to be strong and know I could do anything in the world. Thank you for making me practice tire changing, oil checking, proper use of jumper cables and general auto upkeep before I got a licence then giving me AAA just in case. Most of all thank you for being our rock. When you had your heart attack right before lil bro's wedding I got a cold slap about how much we all depend and need you and how much you do. I tried so hard to fill those shoes for just a short while and failed miserably. I love you with all my heart and just thinking of the picture of you with the shaved head holding the note saying We support you and believe in you makes me still tear up. I looked at the picture before every chemo, before my surgery and in all my lowest moments. You helped me beat cancer even if you couldn't physically be with me for treatment. You amaze me at how unlike your farther you are, it is rare that the son understand the mistakes in how he was raised and so completely fixes them. Syd and Cam are lucky to have a dad trained by you and lucky to have you as a grandpa. Happy Fathers day, no matter how old I am you will always be my daddy and I will always be your little girl.
 
2012-06-17 04:16:53 AM  

belhade: Dad,

I like my Budweiser, dammit.


Which is apparently close to what I said last year.
 
2012-06-17 04:20:33 AM  
"Don't marry her just because you got her pregnant. You're both kids and you hate kids. I didn't ruin your life, you did."
 
2012-06-17 04:25:44 AM  
Also Daddy (and Mommy) please please please don't feel so guilty about not being able to help me with the medical bills financially it is not your fault that after 40 years the business finally crashed. Just having you guys in my corner helps more than you know. I will find a way you taught me how.
 
2012-06-17 04:33:48 AM  
NOOOOOO! NOT MY BRAINS! NOOOOOOOOOOO....GURGLE.
 
2012-06-17 04:40:39 AM  
Thanks for beating my mother,my sister me. Thank you for the mental and sexual abuse that has caused both your daughters to be emotional messes. I hope you die of necrotizing fascitis you piece of shiat.
 
2012-06-17 04:51:50 AM  
thanks for not only being brave enough to be a single father in an era when men didn't often do it, thanks for ignoring the advice to put us in a foster home as 'men can't raise kids by themselves' - which you sure as hell proved wrong.
thanks for not only being the worlds best dad, thanks for being the best substitute for a mother that you could be.
thanks for not only being an amazing grandfather, thanks for showing me all i missed not knowing your dad - who was just as amazing as you, from all reports.
thanks for not only setting the benchmark so high for every man in my life, thanks for being an amazing father in law to my wonder bloke - who is as magic as you.

and there are not enough thanks, daddy. i love you.
 
2012-06-17 05:06:14 AM  
From Mrs.Grestep: what would I say to my dad?
Thanks for nothing, Thanks for never paying child support, for denying my existence, to your mother, father,your 8 siblings, and your wife . ( Who by the way graduated high school with me) And for telling my mother when she showed up at your door after you came home from basic training...."That's not my child".....And for never telling your wife ( that's 9 months younger than me) that you had pictures of me and that I was yours....(till she found those pictures, and asked who the baby was.) And finally, thanks dad, for showing no interest in spending time with me after your wife looked me up and got us to meet, And when I called you on it, publicly posting on Facebook that "you weren't even sure I was yours."Real classy. So happy fathers day Rodger Anderson, or in your case Happy sperm donation day. You worthless piece of shiat!!!
 
2012-06-17 05:11:04 AM  
meh. happy father's day. it is what it is

*eating bacon wrapped filet mignons with him later today*

also, turn off the frickin' tv. you've seen that plot before. it ain't changed none. do something else. maybe even something worthwhile.
 
2012-06-17 05:12:24 AM  
You'd be proud of my Movember efforts, because caring and laughing are the two most important things, and putting them together is awesome.

PS I don't really love inheriting your body shape.
 
2012-06-17 05:27:25 AM  
I got lost in the woods when I was little. I started to cry. You came and found me, and I asked how you knew it was me crying. You said that it didn't matter, if there was a crying child out there you would go and find them and help them no matter who they were.
I love you Daddy, that is probably the most important lesson that you ever taught me.
 
2012-06-17 05:41:55 AM  
I will always regret the fact that I never had the opportunity to kick his ass.
 
2012-06-17 05:48:11 AM  
Dad, I love you, I wish you had been around more when I was a kid, but thank you for being around now. Thank you for spending your winters with me, so I get to spend time with you.


sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net
My dad and big brother 1969

sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net
Me and my dad, this is my favorite pic of us.
 
2012-06-17 05:50:53 AM  
My father passed away in 1998....there are a lot of things I wish I got to say to him. He was an incredible man, my best friend and hero. There is never a day that goes by that I don't think of him. Happy Father's Day Daddy....we love you and you live on in our hearts forever.
 
2012-06-17 06:07:15 AM  
My birth dad or my step-dad?

birth-dad: Why the fark didn't you stop smoking? You probably would have lived to see your grandchildren if you'd stopped smoking.

step-dad: Rot in hell, arsehole!
 
2012-06-17 06:40:02 AM  
What it do, blood.

Thanks for popping a quick load into my mom in the summer of 1983. Turns out I was the strongest of your sperm that night.

You're alright, boss. We got through the tough stuff, and now we get to laugh all the way to hell.

-Sport
 
2012-06-17 06:41:58 AM  
First I would like to apologize for being a troll and an a$$hole. I have been under a lot of stress lately. My son who is 19, and should be at college learning, drinking, and meeting girls has cystic fibrosis. By his late teens the desease had progressed to end-stage lung disease,( isn't that the most farked up euphemism? It's like they weren't even trying).

This this made me very angry at genetics. But genetics, like the honey badger don't give a fark. So i needed to vent my anger. I will not vent this stuff at my wife because she is too beautiful and precious to me. So i chose a semi-anonymous community and I yelled at you. You gave me something that i needed at that time in my life and I am grateful.
Thank you.

Over the years I watched my son who is a natural athlete have to drop out of the sports that he loved because of the progression of his disease. I just was crushed.

I am one of those rare Texans who doesn't give a rats rectum about sports. All of the Super Bowls I ever watched were at somebody's party, where I hung out in the kitchen and played bar tender. But because of my son's love of baseball I became a fan, a student of the game and ultimately what we in Texas call a "baseball man." I even went on to coach high school baseball for three years with a not too shabby 55-19 record. From that experience I learned that if you help kids believe in what they can do and guide them in developing their individual talents they can do amazing stuff.

Last year we knew that he was getting sicker, so we had a little money and I am a veteran from Texas I don't have to pay tuition so I started working on my doctorate. This has been an awesome experience. I have had time to read, chase my interests and be available for my son.

In November he had to drop out of his first semester at college When he had to move back home he was angry and disappointed. I was there to help him through it. We hung out and played video games and we became friends as men. We talked about his mother and how she is a witch, (like Samantha in Bewitched, the real one not the movie), also Daren was blind to the magic he had to help him.

Fortunately, He recently received a lung transplant and is doing well. This is so gratifying because I see him critique the French open, (of course Nadal won, he's a clay court specialist), and looking for a new tennis racquet.

All of this while raising a beautiful perfect daughter, Margret Thatcher and Mother Theresa combined.

So, as I look back on my life I'm okay with it. I am worthy of being who I am.

My father left our family when I was an infant. He moved on and remarried and had other children. He was successful and made a lot of money. I was never included or contacted.
No child support was ever paid and I met him twice in my life. He ultimately died an old broken down alcoholic.

He was a really messed up person and thats too bad.

So I think those of us who had bass-turds for fathers should just look at our own lives and be okay about what we have done and given and received. And we should thank some one wether it's God or what ever for who we are.

I also think that we should take whatever we were going to spend on a gift some one doesn't deserve, we should just spend it on our children, and be okay with it.
 
2012-06-17 06:43:47 AM  
Years ago, my dad was in hospital, in the final stages of leukemia. He was a WW2 vet and lifetime military man. We had never communicated much about feelings and emotions and after my daily visit, I returned to the hospital because I knew he likely wouldn't make it through many more days. I said - Dad, I just have to tell you that I love you. He had a funny look on his face and simply said, Well, David - there are some things that just don't get said. That worked for me. He was a good, honourable and decent man - all about service and doing the right thing. Very old school. Thanks pops, for being a great role model. Mum's still doing fine at 93.
 
2012-06-17 06:51:51 AM  
Froim my wedding speech:

I would like to thank my Mum and Dad for all the help and support they have given me in the last thirty odd years, for giving me a gentle nudge in the right direction with some the important decisions I have made in my life, and a good hard shove with the others. I wouldn't be here without you; Literally because obviously I wouldn't exist but also I'd probably not be standing here making this speech if you hadn't brought me up to be the man I am.

Today I just said "thanks for everything, especialy doning me a kidney". He's alive and well and I live 2000 miles away.
 
2012-06-17 06:55:52 AM  
You were a totally worthless p.o.s. and I'm glad you're no longer on this planet.
 
2012-06-17 07:00:55 AM  
Thanks. Wish we had more time.
 
2012-06-17 07:01:26 AM  
My dad passed away last February. I would say:

You weren't the most involved dad, but every now and then, on a whim, you'd come out in the yard and play with us. Thanks for being our baseball pitcher, and building the snowman with us. Thanks for lifting me up high to touch the ceiling and making me feel like the tallest kid in the world. Thanks for farting only when Mom came in the room and blaming it on her (it really was funny). Thanks for letting me watch NASCAR and college basketball with you; I'm still a fan of both. Thanks for quitting smoking so I got 20 more years with you. Happy Father's Day. I love you.
 
2012-06-17 07:12:41 AM  
Pop, you could be a hell of a guy when you weren't a drunken abusive jackhole, which was most of the time when i was a kid.

Grampa M, Thanks for giving me a nudge down the right roads when i needed it with you're humor and wisdom, for teaching me stuff i still use to this day when i build or fix something, and for showing me that no matter how old you get you should never stop trying to learn new things.
 
2012-06-17 07:20:14 AM  
Thank you for living and shame on you for dying. ;-)

I miss you and love you. You were an awesome dad and grand-dad. Funniest farker I've ever known. Suppotive and always quick to make me feel like I could conquer anything.

I just wish you were able to meet your new son in law. He would have had a blast with you.

Love you, Da. Happy Father's Day from your girl, Pammy.
 
2012-06-17 07:32:05 AM  
To my father:

"I'm never divorcing my wife so for the love of God let that crazy idea go. Five years is long enough so pick up the phone and call. You've got 4 grandkids you've never met, they're growing up fast, and one day you'll regret it. I still love you ya old stubborn son-of-a-biatch."

To my stepdad:

"Thank you for everything you've been in the past 18 years. You've stepped up when my real dad stepped out and tought me more than any other man. I'll never truly be able to show my gratitude."

To my father-in-law:

"Your daughter misses you and so do I. You always treated me like a son and part of the family and I'll never forget that. And thank you for being the voice of reason when we were starting out."
 
2012-06-17 07:43:23 AM  

obamadidcoke: First I would like to apologize for being a troll and an a$$hole. I have been under a lot of stress lately. My son who is 19, and should be at college learning, drinking, and meeting girls has cystic fibrosis. By his late teens the desease had progressed to end-stage lung disease,( isn't that the most farked up euphemism? It's like they weren't even trying).

This this made me very angry at genetics. But genetics, like the honey badger don't give a fark. So i needed to vent my anger. I will not vent this stuff at my wife because she is too beautiful and precious to me. So i chose a semi-anonymous community and I yelled at you. You gave me something that i needed at that time in my life and I am grateful.
Thank you....


As a father of 2 young daughters (3yrs and 9 months) with CF, thank you for posting that. I need the occasional reminder to double my efforts on ensuring they get their treatments every day as prescribed. I like to stay positive and believe they'll outlive me some day.

And in spite of your trolling on Fark, you sound like you've been a pretty good father so keep it up. Any advice from one CF parent to another about my girls' future?
 
2012-06-17 07:44:08 AM  

Mr. Breeze: obamadidcoke: First I would like to apologize for being a troll and an a$$hole. I have been under a lot of stress lately. My son who is 19, and should be at college learning, drinking, and meeting girls has cystic fibrosis. By his late teens the desease had progressed to end-stage lung disease,( isn't that the most farked up euphemism? It's like they weren't even trying).

This this made me very angry at genetics. But genetics, like the honey badger don't give a fark. So i needed to vent my anger. I will not vent this stuff at my wife because she is too beautiful and precious to me. So i chose a semi-anonymous community and I yelled at you. You gave me something that i needed at that time in my life and I am grateful.
Thank you....

As a father of 2 young daughters (3yrs and 9 months) with CF, thank you for posting that. I need the occasional reminder to double my efforts on ensuring they get their treatments every day as prescribed. I like to stay positive and believe they'll outlive me some day.

And in spite of your supposed trolling on Fark, you sound like you've been a pretty good father so keep it up. Any advice from one CF parent to another about my girls' future?

FIFY
 
2012-06-17 07:48:59 AM  
You don't always have to act like a passive-aggressive dick.
 
2012-06-17 07:51:55 AM  
My message -

I love you, Daddy. I miss you still so much. I know it's been 37 years since you've been gone, but the pain of loss still hurts. I hope I have made you proud of me. Thank you for watching over me.
 
2012-06-17 07:54:18 AM  
Thanks for the solid work ethic.

I wish you had slowed down more in your later life to enjoy what you had worked for.
 
2012-06-17 07:55:12 AM  
Dad - you were right.

/Miss you, old man.
 
2012-06-17 08:03:36 AM  
Dad was a jock. On the track team in high school, basketball too. Started his career in education as a gym teacher.

He taught me how to throw a ball, dribble left-handed. We played catch in the backyard. He also taught me how to play chess, solder wires, and make stuff in a wood shop.

When it was pretty obvious I was no jock, he never pushed me. He knew it would be better to play to my strengths than to harangue and humiliate me because I had no sports talent.

No one's perfect, but overall I give him an A.
 
2012-06-17 08:12:48 AM  
Somewhere there is a picture of me and my paternal unit, hunched next to honeysuckle vines. I do love honeysuckle. It's a cute picture, taken from the back from a ways off. I seem to recall this event, but I don't know if I really remember it, or have filled in a blank from looking at the photo. I think the back of this picture is a note addressed to Sweet Girl or Sweet Lenore - he often called me that.

I recall a long walk ending in chocolate ice cream, which I think was bought at a place called Cloud Nine.

I remember a game involving monkeys holding baskets that shinnied up a tree and dropped what they held at the top - first up wins.

I remember he sat me on his lap and let me drive down the driveway. Right into the ditch. I was mortified there at the tender age of something like four, but in later years realized it wasn't entirely my fault. He had the pedals; no way could I reach them, it's not like he couldn't have braked. And he could have corrected my steering and we wouldn't have gone splat like we did. Maybe we didn't go splat as bad as I think we did. Either way, now we know where my hate of driving comes from.

I remember he went off to school and I missed him, but I learned where Oklahoma was on a map.

I recall he married some dreadful woman and they moved to a tiny apartment far away. It smelled funny. I recall he took me to see his parents less and less and her more and more. Looking back, I think she must not have known how to cook. We pretty much always ate stir-fry. Did they just love stir-fry that much, or was that all she knew how to make? At any rate, I hated it.

I don't really remember any birthdays or Christmases, him reading to me or us watching TV together. I remember he got married and I spent the day with a pretty lady with dark hair and a blue dress. I have no idea who that was.

I remember I had a terrible crush on my step-mother's brother. We played pool in their basement. Maybe that's why I like pool so much. So what if I was six and he was thirty? No one cares about age gaps these days!

I remember the conflict of a divorce, of a child not understanding why this set of parents can't get along with that set of parents, and what does that really have to do with me and how I act around everyone? Why can't you grown-ups have your fights and leave me out of it?

I remember learning that just because you go to church doesn't mean you are a good person.

I remember that visits became more about paperwork than having fun.

I remember that everything started being about one-upping someone else till in the end it was all a tower of blocks that came falling down. He signed away his parental rights in exchange for not having to pay child support. I remember a feeling of relief. I was just eight years old.

I have a sister older than I am who I have never met. I also have at least one sibling younger than I am who I think is a boy. I wonder about him sometimes. I am in his parents' wedding pictures. Does he wonder who I am, this small flower girl at his father's feet? Did they tell him, or did they explain me away as the kid of a family friend?

He has given me bad sinuses, lanky hair, funny joints and flat feet. And odd little images that make up a broken childhood. I don't miss my father. I miss what he should have been.

And that's what Father's Day is all about for me, Charlie Brown.
 
2012-06-17 08:13:24 AM  
I lost my dad this year, this is the first Father's Day without him and I'm having a rough go at it.

I'd just say "Thank you"
 
2012-06-17 08:17:29 AM  

KingGeegers: I lost my dad this year, this is the first Father's Day without him and I'm having a rough go at it.

I'd just say "Thank you"


I'm so very sorry. It does get a tiny bit easier as time passes. Not a ton, but a bit.

Peace.
 
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