I refute completely the premise of this headline.

DNRTFA

I want Bourbon, I want Scotch, I want Beer

Bourbon smells like bad decisions.

Eh... I've had friends here in the states and when I lived in Ireland tell me the reason why I don't like Scotch is because I haven't drank "good scotch". I've been handed a myriad of high end scotches and guaranteed I would like it...

Sorry, it all tastes like gasoline to me.

Give me a good Irish or Canadian whiskey any day of the week.

These alcohol headlines posted by people who so clearly no nothing about alcohol are always amusing. But OK, subby, I'm here to help, so instead of just laughing at you or mocking you, let me try to educate you instead.

First of all, if the scotch smells like band-aids, what that means is you haven't properly decanted it. Now, there's all kinds of ways to decant scotch, and you'll see people selling these little devices that insert into the bottle's opening and make the liquid go all sloshy while you pour it. What that sloshing around is doing is forcing airborne chemicals like oxygen and hydrogen into the scotch, which "opens up" the active ingredients that flavor it, like peat and barley and corn. You can use those little inserts if you want, but it's better to buy a decanter, which is basically just a big jug that you can swirl the scotch around in. Then you just pour it from the bottle into the jug and swish it around for a while.

Interesting historical note: this is actually why in all those old-timey cartoons where there are backwoods still operators making their whiskey up in the West Virginia mountains, you always see them drinking out of clay jugs. They knew that they had to decant the whiskey first (and don't get confused by the alternating usage of "scotch" and "whiskey"; what you hear called "scotch" is just what they called it in Scotland after they learned the techniques in America), and so what they would do is make the whiskey in the still, pour it into the bottle to age, and then pour it into their jug when it was ready to decant. Oh, and PROTIP: Remember to NEVER pour back in the bottle from the jug...re-exposure to the glass can ruin the scotch (it's called "glassing" it) and that can really suck. Just keep it in whatever jug you pour it into.

Now, a word of warning: You need to be careful when you're decanting your scotch, because you may not know this, but peat is basically infant coal. It's coal that's starting to form in a bog and hasn't sunk all the way down yet to be mined. It just kind of floats there on top, but it's every bit as combustible as coal. In fact, everything in scotch is combustible...corn particularly so (popcorn is made from controlled corn explosions, after all). Another historical note: Before the discovered wood, Scottish people used peat to make fires. That's why they wear kilts, actually...they'd scoop out a handful of peat from the bog and throw it on the ground and light and then just stand over it to warm their genitals, since it made such a nice low fire. But here's what you need to think about -- hydrogen, which like oxygen just floats around in the air, is actually very explosive. That's why they make bombs out of it. So while you're decanting your scotch in your jug to open it up, you're actually forcing hydrogen to frictionalize against the peat (and other explosive) elements in the alcohol. Don't swirl too violently, in other words. That's why the old still operators used clay jugs, in fact -- the clay helped dampen the explosive effect. The best whiskey decanters are made out of clay compounds, in fact...ask about them in a well-stocked liquor store and they'll be able to direct you to some good suppliers.

Enjoy!

A: It tastes better.

TheDumbBlonde: Bourbon smells like bad decisions.

Not nearly as bad as tequila

/that stuff has definitely led to some bad decisions

does not smell like band-aids




most certainly does not smell like band-aids, or varnish, or any of those other things they attribute to scotch in the article.

I've never had a scotch I like, but that could just be because I've had nothing but bad ones. I'm still willing to try, just not to buy a bottle until I find one.

keylock71: Give me a good Irish or Canadian whiskey any day of the week.

Canadian whiskey is a great disinfectant, and the packaging makes for good dice bags, but I thought this thread was about stuff you'd want to drink.

/a bow to PN, as always

My preference

/hot

Jubeebee: and the packaging makes for good dice bags


CSB:

A good friend of mine has a smoking jacket made from old Crown Royal bags.

Not if you mix it with Mountain Dew, subby.

Jument: Crown Royal is kind of shiatty. Scotch comes from across the pond.

/Canadian so I'm allowed to say that
//the CR "dark" is especially nasty IMHO


The one thing I don't get about my friends:

They have good taste when it comes to cigars, wine, restaurants, etc. But a lot of them always buy Canadian whiskey......like if there's a party, etc. I'm I'm going to bring whiskey to an event, I'm bringing Jack or Maker's Mark.

wrenchboy: TheDumbBlonde: Bourbon smells like bad decisions.

You need to stop hanging out with Trailer Trash who drink Jack Daniels so they can have their trailer park cred.



Since when is Jack considered bourbon?

Hudson Baby Bourbon whiskey that doesn't taste like bourbon (a good thing, in case you're wondering).

Jument: Crown Royal is kind of shiatty. Scotch comes from across the pond.

Not a big fan of CR.

Yeah, I know... Hence the name of it. : )


More of a Canadian Club man, myself. Seagram's works in a pinch, too.

I prefer Paddy or Jameson with regards to Irish whiskeys.

Like I said, Scotch tastes like gasoline to me. I won't even touch the stuff if I have access to Irish or Canadian whiskey.

Not slagging scotch drinkers, mind you, it's just not for me.

My square foot of land at the Laphroaig distillery frown at this headline.

SultanofSchwing: You both should just resign yourself to drinking Daquiri's..."Crown Royal is bad," what the hell?


I don't actually think it's bad....I just think there are better whiskies out there for the same price point. That being said, I do order some on occasion, or have a bottle resting on the bar in my garage.

However,

Canadian Club sucks, and it's only worth drinking if you're enjoying a Mad Men marathon.

Interesting historical note: this is actually why in all those old-timey cartoons where there are backwoods still operators making their whiskey up in the West Virginia mountains, you always see them drinking out of clay jugs. They knew that they had to decant the whiskey first (and don't get confused by the alternating usage of "scotch" and "whiskey"; what you hear called "scotch" is just what they called it in Scotland after they learned the techniques in America), and so what they would do is make the whiskey in the still, pour it into the bottle to age, and then pour it into their jug when it was ready to decant. Oh, and PROTIP: Remember to NEVER pour back in the bottle from the jug...re-exposure to the glass can ruin the scotch (it's called "glassing" it) and that can really suck. Just keep it in whatever jug you pour it into.

This does not make sense....no distilled alcohol "ages" in glass. It is aged in wood barrels.