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(CNN)   Are you a teenager who doesn't drink? Cool, this guy wants to give you $1000   (cnn.com) divider line 90
    More: Hero, Butte  
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10796 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jun 2012 at 9:43 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-15 09:29:35 AM  
You can buy some nice hooch for $1000

/Just saying
 
2012-06-15 09:46:15 AM  
I am 4.3 tenagers.
 
2012-06-15 09:46:24 AM  
What about a twenty something who doesn't drink? It is equally against the norm. Where is my money? This is age discrimination. Outrage!
 
2012-06-15 09:46:27 AM  
I'm not a teen but I don't drink. Can I get $500 at least?
 
2012-06-15 09:46:41 AM  
Hell, in the past 39 years I've had maybe a half dozen drinks total. That's more sobriety than any of those kids have been alive. Where's my money Mr. McCarthy?
 
2012-06-15 09:46:56 AM  
Yeah... teenagers who haven't been taught responsible alcohol use are accidents waiting to happen. Like guzzling a 40 ounce bottle of vodak in 1/2 hour the first time they decide to "cut loose".
 
2012-06-15 09:47:54 AM  
Are you a teenager who doesn't get caught drinking? Cool, this guy wants to give you $1000
 
2012-06-15 09:49:14 AM  
I didn't have my first drink until I was 22. That would have been an easy $K.

/Still not a heavy drinker
 
2012-06-15 09:50:34 AM  
I didn't start drinking until I was 21, give me a thousand bucks retroactively!
 
2012-06-15 09:50:37 AM  

Slives: You can buy some nice hooch for $1000

/Just saying



THIS
global.fncstatic.com

Hey mister I don't drink can you give me a grand.
Two hours later i'm holding a handle of Vodka singing

Oh, the old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be,
Ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.
The old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be,
Many long years ago.
 
2012-06-15 09:51:56 AM  

jjwars1: What about a twenty something who doesn't drink? It is equally against the norm. Where is my money? This is age discrimination. Outrage!


Yeah. 20-something here who volunteers with a safe-ride program.

/Money please!
//Little disappointed "'money please' colbert" GIS was lacking
 
2012-06-15 09:56:39 AM  
I drank as a teen but was never caught. Can I get $20 to pick up some beer?
 
2012-06-15 09:58:22 AM  
Where was this guy when I was a teenager?
 
2012-06-15 09:58:55 AM  
FTFA:
must sign a pledge
must not drink for 4 years at least
then they are eligible to apply for a scholarship

So no, he's not looking to give anyone a grand.
 
2012-06-15 09:59:29 AM  
It's not just Butte, however, that is struggling with the problem. Nationwide, Montana routinely ranks in the top five per capita for drunken-driving fatalities. Those troublesome statistics, along with Mariah's story and other high-profile deaths, have led legislators to seek more aggressive ways to address the issue.

Good luck with that. All of the folks on the rez aren't going to stop driving and they sure as hell aren't going to stop drinking. Maybe wall them in?
 
2012-06-15 09:59:38 AM  
Even when I was a teenager I wasn't a teenager that didn't drink.

What.... what?
 
2012-06-15 10:00:30 AM  
Dammit, where was this dude 9 years ago when I really could have used the cash?
 
2012-06-15 10:01:29 AM  
Had my first drink at 15. Between then and now, which is some 14 years, I doubt I've had more than 60 pints of alcohol in total. If some guy was offering $$$ for me to not drink at all through my teen years that would have been a breeze. I never drank because I enjoyed it, just kinda cause it was easier sometimes than hearing people complain about how 'I wouldn't loosen up and have a beer'. So I'd just have the one and nurse it for about an hour.
 
2012-06-15 10:02:10 AM  
I still am not drinking even as I am now in my 30s (don't smoke or drugs either). Can I get a hundred thousand, since it's beyond my teens and twenties?
 
2012-06-15 10:03:48 AM  
I am 92 years old and the only time I have ever had alcohol was when I accidentally ordered a steak that had a red wine sauce on it. Needless to say, I had one bite, then went to the bathroom to make myself puke.
 
2012-06-15 10:05:04 AM  
I remember my parents talking about people like them who didn't drink. And I thought, wow...don't they get thirsty?

/I was seven. Figured it out a few years later.

Tried wine..why do this to good grape juice?
Never had a beer.
 
2012-06-15 10:06:09 AM  
"I know of a group of kids that got everyone together and said, 'Just bring soda. We're going to have pizza and music. Don't bring any alcohol.'

Good for yo-- wait, music? Are you listening to rock music?
 
2012-06-15 10:06:13 AM  
If he'd get them drunk first they'd put out for a lot less than $1,000.
 
2012-06-15 10:06:42 AM  

mantabulous: I am 92 years old and the only time I have ever had alcohol was when I accidentally ordered a steak that had a red wine sauce on it. Needless to say, I had one bite, then went to the bathroom to make myself puke.


One wonders what a bulimic nonagenarian teetotaler looks like...
 
2012-06-15 10:06:54 AM  
I knew a girl like that in hs. Weird, considering that his dad owned a bar.
 
2012-06-15 10:08:29 AM  

Rindred: Where was this guy when I was a teenager?


Drooling over his daughter, counting the days until she would be ripe for the picking. Then some drunk asshole took her away just when she was getting juicy. This whole deal smells just like Second Mile. 140 teens he's gotten closer to? I bet he sniffs the paper the essays are written on, hoping for perfume. Perv. Just make another daughter and be patient, dude. She'll be 14 before you know it.
 
2012-06-15 10:10:28 AM  

WhippingBoy: Yeah... teenagers who haven't been taught responsible alcohol use are accidents waiting to happen. Like guzzling a 40 ounce bottle of vodak in 1/2 hour the first time they decide to "cut loose".


Not always, my teen is taught responsible use of alcohol, she just can't stand the stuff and always declines or maybe takes one sip and gives it back. Where did I go wrong!!! :)
 
2012-06-15 10:11:42 AM  
WTF, why wasn't this around when I was a teenager? That would have been an easy $1k.
 
2012-06-15 10:14:29 AM  

jjwars1: What about a twenty something who doesn't drink? It is equally against the norm. Where is my money? This is age discrimination. Outrage!


I'm going to be 35 next month. Never even had a beer. Where was this guy in 1995?

/drinking turns people into retards. Only people who find drinkers hilarious are other drunk morons.
 
2012-06-15 10:15:36 AM  
Yeah, $1000 !!!! ... scholarships

i141.photobucket.com

/blood money
 
2012-06-15 10:19:32 AM  

CygnusDarius: I knew a girl like that in hs. Weird, considering that his dad owned a bar.


Sounds like the bigger issue was her gender-reassignment surgery (pronoun agreement FTL).
 
2012-06-15 10:19:56 AM  
Good for him, and the teens.

However, as a teen I would have told him to keep that scholarship.

*stands outside 7-11 waiting for you to buy me beer*
 
2012-06-15 10:20:21 AM  
I haven't had my first drink of the day yet.* Where's my money, money man?

*Give me 2 hours.
 
2012-06-15 10:21:15 AM  

mudpants: I am 4.3 tenagers.


Does that mean you're 43 agers?

CygnusDarius: I knew a girl like that in hs. Weird, considering that his dad owned a bar.


O_o
 
2012-06-15 10:26:28 AM  

hbk72777: jjwars1: What about a twenty something who doesn't drink? It is equally against the norm. Where is my money? This is age discrimination. Outrage!

I'm going to be 35 next month. Never even had a beer. Where was this guy in 1995?

/drinking turns people into retards. Only people who find drinkers hilarious are other drunk morons.


Ben Franklin, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, John Adams, Samuel Adams, and James Madison would all disagree with you. They all brewed and drank beer, and they are just a few of the founding fathers who fall in that category. In conclusion, perhaps if you had an occasional beer you wouldn't be such an idiot.
 
2012-06-15 10:27:26 AM  
FWIW, you don't actually have to not drink to be eligible for this scholarship, you just have to not be caught drinking.
 
2012-06-15 10:28:03 AM  

tardigrade: Are you a teenager who doesn't get caught drinking? Cool, this guy wants to give you $1000



Oh hell yes. I drank my face off, but I was never caught. I'd have happily taken this guy's.... uhhhh.... chance at a scholarship, I guess.
 
2012-06-15 10:29:42 AM  

MindStalker: Not always, my teen is taught responsible use of alcohol, she just can't stand the stuff and always declines or maybe takes one sip and gives it back. Where did I go wrong!!! :)


Sometimes it jumps a generation. Or it will catch up with her later. My dad didn't start drinking until he was in his 60's. Mom said back in the day he only drank once a year (usually on New Year) and it was the only time she could stand him.

My daughter drinks but not like most of the family and both her parents are notorious boozers.
 
2012-06-15 10:31:57 AM  

Tapakip: I'm not a teen but I don't drink. Can I get $500 at least?


"And finally, these are the men who dont drink and don't care."

"I drink!"

"Guard! Put this man in cell one. And get him a drink!"
 
2012-06-15 10:35:18 AM  
I wouldn't even trade $10,000 for all of the wonderful memories of being drunk off my ass when I was a teenager.
 
2012-06-15 10:38:10 AM  
Where was this guy when I was in HS? I even irritated myself with how straight-edge I was
 
2012-06-15 10:38:16 AM  
How about spending that $1000 and teach teenagers how to properly drink and be responsible?

Perhaps then they won't be driving drunk in the future. Vs. abstaining and suddenly going overboard when they are of driving age?
 
2012-06-15 10:38:29 AM  
i174.photobucket.com

Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes.

No respect at all.
 
2012-06-15 10:41:37 AM  

otto the bull: I wouldn't even trade $10,000 for all of the wonderful memories of being drunk off my ass when I was a teenager.


Ah yes, waking up in the front yard with my head in a puddle of partially digested tequila and Jack in the Box tacos. Fine were the days of high spirits and low morals.
 
2012-06-15 10:42:04 AM  
I'm almost 40 and drink a ton, what do I get?

Cirrhosis? Cool, thanks.
 
2012-06-15 10:42:17 AM  
www.matthewratzloff.com
 
2012-06-15 10:42:48 AM  
Not worth it.
 
2012-06-15 10:45:21 AM  
Well, if you read the whole article, they are trying to change the mindset of the community that has historically been rather alcoholic if the article is correct. Alcohol is a hell of a drug. IMHO he should throw in a bag of the good stuff with that grand.
 
2012-06-15 10:49:49 AM  

hbk72777: jjwars1: What about a twenty something who doesn't drink? It is equally against the norm. Where is my money? This is age discrimination. Outrage!

I'm going to be 35 next month. Never even had a beer. Where was this guy in 1995?

/drinking turns people into retards. Only people who find drinkers hilarious are other drunk morons.


Alcohol has been a part of the human experience for thousands and thousands of years. It's your choice and all, but I think you are missing out. Does drinking turn people into retards? It can. I don't think they post many "Bob came home and had a few beers after work and felt relaxed and didn't do anything ridiculous or silly" stories. Of course all you're going to hear are the horror stories. And drinking in a bar is not even close to the full scope of drinking experiences you can have. A bar is a special place where you go to get extra retarded on purpose. Few beers at home with a few good friends can make for a great evening.
 
2012-06-15 10:52:00 AM  
You could buy a lot of pot with $1000.
You could buy a lot of mushrooms with $1000.
You could buy a lot of bath salts with $1000.
 
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