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(Mirror.co.uk)   If you're going to use a samurai sword to fight off some intruders you'd better know how to use it. I'm just sayin'   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 106
    More: Fail, samurai sword, front garden, samurai  
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12151 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jun 2012 at 3:00 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-14 09:52:37 PM  
At least it didn't break when he tried to use it.

dumbimages.net
 
2012-06-14 09:54:09 PM  
The man with the sword who moved toward the bored hoard he abhorred was gored on his own accord?
 
2012-06-14 09:55:15 PM  
I've seen every episode of Rurouni Kenshin! I know what I'm doing.
 
2012-06-14 10:32:03 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-06-14 10:38:05 PM  
Was his name Yoshimitsu?
 
2012-06-14 11:17:20 PM  
Bit of a shiat sword for anything in close quarters. Still, points for Seppuku, bet they didn't expect that.
 
2012-06-14 11:31:26 PM  
A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.
 
2012-06-15 12:17:16 AM  

doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.


Claymore, man.
 
2012-06-15 12:27:59 AM  
Do like the bonobos do and greet them with a firm erection.
 
2012-06-15 12:41:49 AM  

brap: Do like the bonobos do and greet them with a firm erection.


Is that a bonobo in your pants, or are you just glad to see me?
 
2012-06-15 02:00:22 AM  

RexTalionis: doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.

Claymore, man.


A claymore's a varied word now applied mostly to one handed basket hilted things. If you mean a longsword like William Wallace had in Braveheart, though, I'm with ya. Plus, I can use mine indoors. Dunno about other people, but I know I can.
 
2012-06-15 02:18:36 AM  
The old great-sword-in-the-house use-toothpaste-to-fill-in-the-ceiling-gouges trick, eh?
 
2012-06-15 02:23:35 AM  

Therion: The old great-sword-in-the-house use-toothpaste-to-fill-in-the-ceiling-gouges trick, eh?


cotton and elmer's glue with a dry brushing of white model paint.


I mean, I dunno what you're talking about.
 
2012-06-15 03:05:18 AM  
Personally, indoors I'd go with a gladius. Or a kukhuri for the scary-looking-blade factor. The latter has a thick-as-hell back that you can use for non-lethal blows if you don't want body parts littering the floor.
 
2012-06-15 03:12:13 AM  
best to use a gladius or wakizashi indoors.
 
2012-06-15 03:13:41 AM  

doglover: RexTalionis: doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.

Claymore, man.

A claymore's a varied word now applied mostly to one handed basket hilted things. If you mean a longsword like William Wallace had in Braveheart, though, I'm with ya. Plus, I can use mine indoors. Dunno about other people, but I know I can.


I thought he meant an antipersonnel command-det mine.
 
2012-06-15 03:14:52 AM  
As someone who grabbed a wakizashi (the closest thing on hand) to kill a rather large palmetto this evening, I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

Yeah, it was kinda fun, actually. I should stop drinking now.
 
2012-06-15 03:15:04 AM  
static2.dmcdn.net
 
2012-06-15 03:19:03 AM  
farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2012-06-15 03:25:22 AM  
You are 43 times more likely to be injured by your own samurai sword than use it in self-defense.
 
2012-06-15 03:28:35 AM  
a samurai sword is my weapon of choice for home defense. also have a few knives, but if someone bad comes in here, they get the sword. hope i don't end on fark...
 
2012-06-15 04:08:05 AM  
It's like a replay of Musashi and Sasaki! Except Mu used a wood sword carved from a boat oar. And he didn't lose. On a beach.

After further consideration, perhaps not quite the same.

Strike this testimony from the transcript!
 
2012-06-15 04:08:10 AM  
CSB Time

A loooooong time ago there was a website that sold swords, maces, spears, ect...

They had what was called a 'fluted mace', with all the usual 'how well its made' statements but it actually included a statement about how it had actually been used for home defense.

I've always just had this horrible image of some dismayed police officers looking at some guy with his head bashed open with a mace... wondering if they can talk the owner in to buying a pistol so they never have to worry about writing a report like this again.
 
2012-06-15 04:10:58 AM  

some_beer_drinker: a samurai sword is my weapon of choice for home defense.


I might rethink that if I were you.
For reference, I am iaidoku, and train daily in Eishin-ryū - and with shinken, not bokken. There is most often at least one actual Nihonto shinken, not some show sword, within my reach at any given time in my house and often in my vehicles in my dojo bag.

Given that, my chosen home defense weapon is a 12 ga. shotgun. My choice for pdw is a compact .40

Just sayin'
 
2012-06-15 04:11:52 AM  
I keep a nice Zulu short spear (Cold Steel) that is about 3 ft. long, 13 in. of which is blade.
It is very sharp, and intimidating.
Just the sight of it alone has ended two burglary attempts.

Anyone with a bit of military training should be able to use it much as one would use a rifle and bayonet for close quarter combat.

Both I and my brother are big fans of edged weapons and have a nice collection of swords, knives, and other sharp, pointy, sticking/stabbing type things.

/ probably some phallic symbolism in there
// can't imagine what it would be though
/// will ask Dr. Freud.
 
2012-06-15 04:21:39 AM  

HotWingAgenda: doglover: RexTalionis: doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.

Claymore, man.

A claymore's a varied word now applied mostly to one handed basket hilted things. If you mean a longsword like William Wallace had in Braveheart, though, I'm with ya. Plus, I can use mine indoors. Dunno about other people, but I know I can.

I thought he meant an antipersonnel command-det mine.


This is also the first thing I think of when I hear claymore. "This side towards enemy".
 
2012-06-15 04:22:51 AM  

CliChe Guevara: some_beer_drinker: a samurai sword is my weapon of choice for home defense.

I might rethink that if I were you.
For reference, I am iaidoku, and train daily in Eishin-ryū - and with shinken, not bokken. There is most often at least one actual Nihonto shinken, not some show sword, within my reach at any given time in my house and often in my vehicles in my dojo bag.

Given that, my chosen home defense weapon is a 12 ga. shotgun. My choice for pdw is a compact .40

Just sayin'


ya, well, i am Canadian. we don't need guns. tough enough without them.
 
2012-06-15 04:23:19 AM  
The 65-year-old spotted three youths in his front garden in the early hours and shouted at them to get off his property

Way to reinforce the stereotype there.
 
2012-06-15 04:25:53 AM  
ALWAYS remember the 3 Ds- Dead, Dying, DON'T FARK WITH SWORDS.
 
2012-06-15 04:41:38 AM  

some_beer_drinker: CliChe Guevara: some_beer_drinker: a samurai sword is my weapon of choice for home defense.

I might rethink that if I were you.
For reference, I am iaidoku, and train daily in Eishin-ryū - and with shinken, not bokken. There is most often at least one actual Nihonto shinken, not some show sword, within my reach at any given time in my house and often in my vehicles in my dojo bag.

Given that, my chosen home defense weapon is a 12 ga. shotgun. My choice for pdw is a compact .40

Just sayin'

ya, well, i am Canadian. we don't need guns. tough enough without them.


It's not the use guns, but the need to defend against them. If the intruders weren't carrying them, keeping one wouldn't be an issue.

But, that genie isn't going back into the bottle, either.
 
2012-06-15 04:42:26 AM  
This is precisely why I yell at clouds and not youths.

Clouds such at Iaido.
 
2012-06-15 04:45:48 AM  
Oh, subby, "I'm just sayin'". There is one phrase that is over-used.
 
2012-06-15 04:53:04 AM  

sallys: Oh, subby, "I'm just sayin'". There is one phrase that is over-used.


Seconded.Also, it usually follows something that should not have been said. It is linguistically akin to, "I'm not racist, but..." You know the followup to that will be racist, but somehow the speaker feels that the preceding caveat somehow excuses whatever idiocy is sure to follow.

That said, 'just sayin' is another of those cliched justifications for an idiotic opinion with all the weight of a "just kidding" tacked at the end.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees this.

Addendum from the Urban Dictionary seems to have nailed it much more succinctly than I have:

"a term coined to be used at the end of something insulting or offensive to take the heat off you when you say it."
 
2012-06-15 05:35:24 AM  
CliChe Guevara: I am iaidoku,

It's you.

You're the chosen one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usHNFkJGpMQ&feature=fvwrel
 
2012-06-15 06:18:40 AM  
"just sayin" what??
 
2012-06-15 06:32:51 AM  

doglover: RexTalionis: doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.

Claymore, man.

A claymore's a varied word now applied mostly to one handed basket hilted things. If you mean a longsword like William Wallace had in Braveheart, though, I'm with ya. Plus, I can use mine indoors. Dunno about other people, but I know I can.


Well, yes, not everybody's "claymore" is the same size...
 
2012-06-15 06:37:27 AM  

Drammach: I keep a nice Zulu short spear (Cold Steel) that is about 3 ft. long, 13 in. of which is blade.
It is very sharp, and intimidating.
Just the sight of it alone has ended two burglary attempts.

Anyone with a bit of military training should be able to use it much as one would use a rifle and bayonet for close quarter combat.

Both I and my brother are big fans of edged weapons and have a nice collection of swords, knives, and other sharp, pointy, sticking/stabbing type things.

/ probably some phallic symbolism in there
// can't imagine what it would be though
/// will ask Dr. Freud.


If you've defended against two burglary attempts using the same spear, you need a new weapon: you need to move.
 
2012-06-15 06:58:59 AM  
If you want to fend off a home intruder, get a gun.
Failing that, get a bolo or bowie knife.

/Machetes are good too.
/Keep it simple.
 
2012-06-15 07:14:35 AM  
DNRTFA: You know why?! I had to watch a sponsored Fark video ad (for Bunk) that ran 15 seconds first. That's the first time I've ever seen that happen here. And quite frankly, that pisses me off!!

If Fark is going in that direction, I may stop coming around altogether.

Not cool, guys. Not at all.
 
2012-06-15 07:14:42 AM  
blogs.whatsontv.co.uk
 
2012-06-15 07:15:31 AM  
I should save this story for when Farkers go into threads proclaiming how they have knives and swords for self defense.
 
2012-06-15 07:19:11 AM  

cynicalbastard: Personally, indoors I'd go with a gladius. Or a kukhuri for the scary-looking-blade factor. The latter has a thick-as-hell back that you can use for non-lethal blows if you don't want body parts littering the floor.


With the balance of the kukhuri toward the blade, blows witht he flat aren't goign tobe that effective, plus yo owuld have to hold it "backwards" wich coudl get you in trouble if you needed to start slicing.


doglover: RexTalionis: doglover: A katana isn't for scaring people away by waving. It's for killing them ten seconds before the know they're dead with lightning fast draw/cut attacks. Iiado. Lookitup!

If you wanna scare kids away, get a shotgun with a nice pump action.

Claymore, man.

A claymore's a varied word now applied mostly to one handed basket hilted things. If you mean a longsword like William Wallace had in Braveheart, though, I'm with ya. Plus, I can use mine indoors. Dunno about other people, but I know I can.


Close quarters I woudl prefer the one handed basket sword.
 
2012-06-15 07:22:28 AM  
I bet he gets arrested once released since the U.K. banned swords.

Link
 
2012-06-15 07:32:09 AM  
Too boring to mix in bad company.
Too ugly to rape.
Too poor to rob.

I don't need any self defence.
 
2012-06-15 07:33:01 AM  
www.sinepil.org
"Rule #1 Don't get shot stabbed with your own merchandise"
 
2012-06-15 07:37:09 AM  

pxlboy: As someone who grabbed a wakizashi (the closest thing on hand) to kill a rather large palmetto this evening, I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

Yeah, it was kinda fun, actually. I should stop drinking now.


I am surprised you actualy managed to kill one of those hell-beasts with it, and that it didn't take it away from you. It must have been distracted while deciding who it's next dive-bombing victim would be.

/hate those farking things. Roaches are supposed to scatter when the light turns on. Not turn it on for you.
 
2012-06-15 07:59:29 AM  
Seems fairly self-explanatory:

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-06-15 08:10:33 AM  
videos.videopress.com

You put the pointy end into the other man
 
2012-06-15 08:11:47 AM  
I still don't understand how some people think it's easier to stab someone than it is to shoot them. I have a feeling it's not like the movies when you stab someone.
 
2012-06-15 08:15:10 AM  
"There can be only one"
 
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