"I hope you brought your wallet, because the rent in HELL gets PAID in ADVAAANCE!!!!" - Sarge

I know these were from sailors but either "flank speed, full left rudder" or "Mr. Burton, you may open fire."

/Taffy 3, how they sailed such small ships with such large brass balls on board is a mystery to me.

NUTS

TommyDeuce: /Taffy 3, how they sailed such small ships with such large brass balls on board is a mystery to me.

Supposedly, upon seeing the Japanese ships withdrawing, a sailor on one of Taffy 3's destroyers griped, "dammit, boys, they're getting away!"

Dawnrazor: TommyDeuce: /Taffy 3, how they sailed such small ships with such large brass balls on board is a mystery to me.

Supposedly, upon seeing the Japanese ships withdrawing, a sailor on one of Taffy 3's destroyers griped, "dammit, boys, they're getting away!"

That was the other one I was thinking of.

/Generally speaking, the U.S. Navy has been something to avoid farking with.

"We've got 'em boys!"
-Lt Col G.A. Custer
Little Bighorn

TommyDeuce: Dawnrazor: TommyDeuce: /Taffy 3, how they sailed such small ships with such large brass balls on board is a mystery to me.

Supposedly, upon seeing the Japanese ships withdrawing, a sailor on one of Taffy 3's destroyers griped, "dammit, boys, they're getting away!"

That was the other one I was thinking of.

/Generally speaking, the U.S. Navy has been something to avoid farking with.

taffy, that was caused by halsey being a bit of an idiot as well, no.
I wonder if delay was trolling about halsey.

"The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his."

"I ain't got time to bleed."

"Don't these people ever give up?" : Kilgore 79'

Just read this one:

When an Army captain asked him for the direction of the line of retreat, Col Puller called his artillerymen, gave them the Army position, and ordered: "If they start to pull back from that line, even one foot, I want you to open fire on them." Turning to the captain, he replied "Does that answer your question?
We're here to fight."
- Chesty Puller at Koto-ri in Korea

Where are the Snowdens of yesteryear

Rent Party:
What do you suppose the results of losing Midway were gonna be? They turn around and sail home? Did the Japanese occupation of the Aleutian islands indicate any broader geopolitical goals?

The result of losing at Midway would be that the Pacific War would last until 1946. The Allies would still have won, it just would have taken another six-to-twelve months.

Midway itself would have become just another starving outpost, unable to be supported by the Imperial Japanese Navy, like so many other Japanese island bases became.

Even if Kido Butai didn't lose a single carrier at Midway, and the US lost all all three they brought, the Japanese would have been outnumbered in fleet carriers by late 1943. If you add in the Independence-class CVLs, the situation becomes even more lopsided; all nine of those were commissioned by the end of 1943 as well. And each and every one of those carriers would have an air wing made up of Hellcats and/or Corsairs, Dauntlesses and Avengers, better planes than what the IJN could field.

The atoll would have proven to be worse than useless to the Japanese... it would cost them vital merchant shipping to keep supplied with food and fuel, shipping they were chronically short of in the first place.

The occupation of the Aleutians was done pretty much to prevent the US from launching air attacks against the Home Islands from them. They weren't going to go marching through Alaska and Canada to invade Washington and Oregon, after all. In retrospect, the concept of flying much of anything out of Attu or Kiska is fairly silly... there are few places less hospitable to airframes than them. That it was done by the Army Air Forces is one of the great unknown stories of the Pacific War.

So, to recap: Midway? Expensive to take and useless to hold, worth maybe another 12 months of war in the end. Aleutians? Well, at least they had a reason.

In addition to the "we will fight in the shade" quote, another from the same battle was by a Spartan painting a life size image of a house fly on his shield. When asked why, he said that he will be so close to the Persians, that it will appear as big as a lion.

relcec: I wonder if delay was trolling about halsey.

Not trolling, in my opinion and in the opinion of the Japanese admirals who were engaged therein, Halsey won this battle, and subsequently the rest of the war at sea. From then on the Japanese ships made no difference at all from this battle to the rest of the war. Why? The Japanese navy returned to port and were effectively destroyed. Maybe Halsey picked the admirals at the Battle of Samar by luck, maybe on skill, but on record, objectively, Halsey won the war in the Pacific.

relcec: Where are the Snowdens of yesteryear

ho ho beriberi

Ihr Racker, wollt ihr ewig leben?
-Frederick the Great

Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum Europae vincendarum
-Julius Caeser

"Damn the torpedoes!"

Bleyo: This is quality, 17th century trash talking.

I, the Sultan, son of Mohamed, brother of the Sun and Moon, grandson and vicegerent of God, sovereign of all kingdoms: of Macedonia, Babylonia, and Jerusalem, of Upper and Lower Egypt: king of kings, ruler of all that exists; extraordinary, invincible knight; constant guardian of the grave of Jesus Christ; trustee of God himself; hope and comfort of Moslems, confusion and great protector of Christians, command you, the Zaporozhian Cossacks, to surrender to me voluntarily and without any kind of resistance, and don't permit yourselves to trouble me with your attacks!

Turkish Sultan Mohamed

With the response:

Zaporozhians -- to the Turkish Sultan

You Turkish Satan, brother and comrade of the damned devil and secretary to Lucifer himself! What the hell kind of knight are you? The devil [shiats] and you and your army swallow [it]. You aren't fit to have the sons of Christians under you; we aren't afraid of your army, and we'll fight you on land and sea. You Babylonian busboy, Macedonian mechanic, Jerusalem beer brewer, Alexandrian goat skinner, swineherd of Upper and Lower Egypt, Armenian pig, Tatar goat, Kamenets hangman, Podolian thief, grandson of the Evil Serpent himself, and buffoon of all the world and the netherworld, fool of our God, swine's snout, mare's [asshole], butcher's dog, unbaptized brow, may the devil steam your ass! That's how the Cossacks answer you, you nasty glob of spit! You're unfit to rule true Christians. We don't know the date because we don't have a calendar, the moon is in the sky, and the year is in a book, and the day is the same with us as with you, so go kiss our [butt]!

-Chief Hetman Zaxarcenko with all the Zaporozhian Host

It sounds a lot "richer" in Russian, trust me.

Would have been cool, except Cossacks were your average 17th century nazis - very into killing (quartering, cutting out fetuses from pregnant women, killing male children), raping anything with a vagina - primarily focusing on Gypsies and Jews in their spare time, in between you know - raping, killing and pillaging Jews and Gypsies.

Real farking heroes, those coonts

"GIVE ME LIBERTY, OR GIVE ME DEATH! But with dinner, I'll have stuffing!"

AbiNormal: "Come on, you sons of biatches! Do you want to live forever?"

Spoken by a double MoH recipient, no less.

Delay: relcec: I wonder if delay was trolling about halsey.

Not trolling, in my opinion and in the opinion of the Japanese admirals who were engaged therein, Halsey won this battle, and subsequently the rest of the war at sea. From then on the Japanese ships made no difference at all from this battle to the rest of the war. Why? The Japanese navy returned to port and were effectively destroyed. Maybe Halsey picked the admirals at the Battle of Samar by luck, maybe on skill, but on record, objectively, Halsey won the war in the Pacific.

you are crazy. who told you halsey won the war in the pacific?
you could have *won* the war in the pacific if given our production capabilities and signals/decryption capabilities. it was impossible to lose.

halsey took the bait and lured away from leyte gulf and almost got a decent part of Philippine invasion force logistics train slaughtered.

he also ran through two typhoons resulting in a lot of dead sailors.

tortilla burger: Surely there must be better ones out there.

"Get off my lawn"

/nothing more to be said

"War is cruelty. There is no use trying to reform it. The crueler it is, the sooner it will be over. " - William Tecumseh Sherman

"Your mother is an hamster and your father smells of elderberries!"

"Who am I?
I am Susan Ivanova. Commander. Daughter of Andre and Sophie Ivanov. I am the right hand of vengeance and the boot that is going to kick your sorry ass all the way back to Earth, sweetheart. I am death incarnate, and the last living thing that you are ever going to see. God sent me."

This text is now purple: Delay: Bull Halsey had a clear idea to win a US victory over Imperial Japan. Then he made his men move according to his plan. Perhaps, Fark posters may want to comment on his remarkable success. Here's mine. If it were not for Admiral Bull Halsey, I would never have been born and you would not speak English.

Japan was never a threat to invade the United States.

Aleutians much?

The best warfighters don't need words to get their point across.

Delay: This text is now purple: Japan was never a threat to invade the United States.

When I take walks along the Marin Headlands I see bunker after bunker built to respond to the anticipated Japanese attack on the US. Did it ever happen? Well, there was that incident on December 7, 1941 when Japan attacked the US Naval Base at Pearl Harbor in an attempt to destroy the entire Pacific fleet. Perhaps you have been home schooled?

"Invade" Means put occupying troops into a piece of territory. Yes, we were afraid of being invaded, but japan never really had the numbers for that. They could bomb us, but not occupy the vast amount of land that the US has more than japan does. when you compare their 145,946 square mile country to our 3,615,054 square mile country, it is clear that an occupying force is downright impossible.

"What the fark was that?!?" ~ The Mayor of Hiroshima, 6 August 1945.

chunk75: This text is now purple: Delay: Bull Halsey had a clear idea to win a US victory over Imperial Japan. Then he made his men move according to his plan. Perhaps, Fark posters may want to comment on his remarkable success. Here's mine. If it were not for Admiral Bull Halsey, I would never have been born and you would not speak English.

Japan was never a threat to invade the United States.

Aleutians much?

Yes, because the Japanese landing on the part of America the Americans don't even know about,much less give a flying toss about is a serious invasion of the US. They captured 90 whole people. Americans killed more than 90 Americans during WWII in whiffle-bat-related activities. If Japan had said they wanted the US to bluntly give them the Aleutian Islands to end the Pacific War, we would have probably done it for the lulz - after some American went and looked up what the fark the Aleutians were, where the fark they were, and if we farking claimed possession of them. More armed Canadians have probably crossed over the border into the US than Japanese did in WWII - hardly think that counts as an "invasion" by Canada.

Let's be honest: When the US finally went up to push the Japanese out of the Aleutians, at least one officer had to have asked if we couldn't just leave them their and just call it a day - and it probably took the better part of a year to come up with some reason not to take him up on it.

Get to da choppa!

If I recall correctly, by the time the Americans tried to retake the Aleutians, the Japanese had already pulled out. That didn't stop a few dozen Americans from getting killed from friendly fire or from getting lost/severe hypothermia/frostbite.

I'm kind of partial to Lt. William Calley: "Let's do the village! Let's do the whole farking village!"

/obscure?

German solder "I came for your terms of surrender".
British solder "I'm sorry we can't take you all prisoner".

tlchwi02: steamingpile: Yeah that's not true.

go ahead and google the sons of iraq. maybe "tribute" isn't the best word, since i'm not actually arguing that this was a bad strategy- to the contrary, it seems to have been a very excellent strategy. If i had my way, we would have just bribed these guys to throw saddam in a river instead of invading at all. Its just in the context of this quote where he's ostensibly being a super "bad-ass" before killing people, its hard to ignore that a scant few years later we were resorting to bribery to stop them from trying to kill us. especially compared to the other examples on the list, where the quote givers all went off and laid a total beating on their enemies.

We should totally have done this. It would have made an epic comedy movie.

cynep: Bleyo: This is quality, 17th century trash talking.

I, the Sultan, son of Mohamed, brother of the Sun and Moon, grandson and vicegerent of God, sovereign of all kingdoms: of Macedonia, Babylonia, and Jerusalem, of Upper and Lower Egypt: king of kings, ruler of all that exists; extraordinary, invincible knight; constant guardian of the grave of Jesus Christ; trustee of God himself; hope and comfort of Moslems, confusion and great protector of Christians, command you, the Zaporozhian Cossacks, to surrender to me voluntarily and without any kind of resistance, and don't permit yourselves to trouble me with your attacks!

Turkish Sultan Mohamed

With the response:

Zaporozhians -- to the Turkish Sultan

You Turkish Satan, brother and comrade of the damned devil and secretary to Lucifer himself! What the hell kind of knight are you? The devil [shiats] and you and your army swallow [it]. You aren't fit to have the sons of Christians under you; we aren't afraid of your army, and we'll fight you on land and sea. You Babylonian busboy, Macedonian mechanic, Jerusalem beer brewer, Alexandrian goat skinner, swineherd of Upper and Lower Egypt, Armenian pig, Tatar goat, Kamenets hangman, Podolian thief, grandson of the Evil Serpent himself, and buffoon of all the world and the netherworld, fool of our God, swine's snout, mare's [asshole], butcher's dog, unbaptized brow, may the devil steam your ass! That's how the Cossacks answer you, you nasty glob of spit! You're unfit to rule true Christians. We don't know the date because we don't have a calendar, the moon is in the sky, and the year is in a book, and the day is the same with us as with you, so go kiss our [butt]!

-Chief Hetman Zaxarcenko with all the Zaporozhian Host

It sounds a lot "richer" in Russian, trust me.

Would have been cool, except Cossacks were your average 17th century nazis - very into killing (quartering, cutting out fetuses from pregnant women, killing male children), raping anything with a vagina - primar ...

Granted but you have to admit that second letter is pretty funny if you read it with the voice of John Cleese as the French guy from the Holy Grail in your head.

netweavr: In addition, Mexico never signed on with the Axis powers.


After torpedoing Mexican oil tankers, Hitler thought Mexico would side with him? What was he, crazy?

dj_bigbird: Molon labe didn't make the cut? For shame.

I was just about to ask the same question.

cgraves67: Nuts

"Nuts" it is.

That and I'd imagine Sherman said some pretty wacky stuff marching through Georgia.