If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(ESPN)   France says it's filing new doping charges against Lance Armstrong and he may lose all 7 Tour de France titles. Just kidding, it's the United States   (espn.go.com) divider line 168
    More: Followup, Tour de France, United States, United States Anti-Doping Agency, Tour de France titles, EPO, triathlons, team physician, Johan Bruyneel  
•       •       •

1131 clicks; posted to Sports » on 14 Jun 2012 at 8:57 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



168 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-14 08:58:17 AM  
If he doped they should strip the titles. I love Armstrong so it'll break my heart, but unfair is unfair
 
2012-06-14 09:00:25 AM  
In a sport where everyone else is doping, the best performer of the modern age was also doping? You don't say!

You've got to admit, though, it takes a lot of balls to cheat like that.
 
2012-06-14 09:02:14 AM  
Well, that seems like a real ball buster.
 
2012-06-14 09:02:50 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-06-14 09:03:58 AM  
The only way to level the playing field is to let everyone dope.

Discuss.
 
2012-06-14 09:05:43 AM  
If everyone at the USADA ate shiat and died tomorrow, the world would be a much nicer place.
 
2012-06-14 09:06:55 AM  
On the one hand, I think he cheated like everyone else. I somehow doubt that losing a nut makes you a better athlete than you were.

But on the other hand, it's been 7 years, who the hell gives a sh*t? And probably most people who finished behind him were doping too, so you just vacate 7 consecutive years of titles?
 
2012-06-14 09:07:30 AM  

skankboy: The only way to level the playing field is to let everyone dope.

Discuss.


These are professional athletes. If they're not doping, they're not giving 110%. And if they're not giving 110%, why bother?

At LEAST put a god damned statute of limitations on it. Two years should do it. Anything past that is pure politics.
 
kab
2012-06-14 09:07:58 AM  
They should just go back and strip all titles, since someone somewhere certainly saw a prior champ doping, especially before drug testing was implemented.

That'd be "fair". And completely pointless.
 
2012-06-14 09:08:10 AM  
He doped. They all doped. He was able to hide it very well, but he doped. You don't win 7 Tours in this day and age without enhancements.

His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)

What's going to really hurt him is losing the respect of all the fans. He has lied like a boss for so long... lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

His organization "Live Strong" will fold it's doors within the year as well, and it's a shame - it's a good one.

Goodbye, Lance Armstrong. And welcome...welcome to the ranks of The Shamed. The long list of cheats and liars who end up like Jose Canseco, struggling to get 500 dollar speaking gigs or tiny appearance fees. He will die an old, bitter man, filled with regret.
 
2012-06-14 09:08:16 AM  
This guy gets "Randomly" tested at the end of almost every single stage of the last two TDF runs (as well as through the year) and has *always* been clean.

Give me a break.
 
2012-06-14 09:08:41 AM  
I haven't heard a single person come to Armstrong's defense...he's got dozens of current and ex-cyclists saying he doped, they doped with him, etc.

But...he still never failed a test, and I must admit his denials of the accusations are about as close to being believable as I've ever heard.

That said, if he is found to have doped, it would be one of the worst conclusions to a sporting career ever.

He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.
 
2012-06-14 09:09:01 AM  
I heard he used so much dope that Sheryl Crow got secondary cancer from him. Still he's got ball--he'll fight this
 
2012-06-14 09:09:53 AM  

Langston: If he doped they should strip the titles. I love Armstrong so it'll break my heart, but unfair is unfair


His drug tests all came back negative. End of story, right? You would think. But the USADA is giving out sweetheart deals to proven lying bastards like Floyd Landis, in exchange for God knows what kind of manufactured testimony.

The USADA is off the rails.
 
2012-06-14 09:11:01 AM  
That's just completely nut.
 
2012-06-14 09:11:12 AM  

Optimus Primate: He doped. They all doped. He was able to hide it very well, but he doped. You don't win 7 Tours in this day and age without enhancements.

His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)

What's going to really hurt him is losing the respect of all the fans. He has lied like a boss for so long... lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

His organization "Live Strong" will fold it's doors within the year as well, and it's a shame - it's a good one.

Goodbye, Lance Armstrong. And welcome...welcome to the ranks of The Shamed. The long list of cheats and liars who end up like Jose Canseco, struggling to get 500 dollar speaking gigs or tiny appearance fees. He will die an old, bitter man, filled with regret.


HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

Let me say that again: HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

This "investigation" is a load of horse shiat.
 
2012-06-14 09:11:57 AM  
Keep moving winners back until you end up with some domestique who wasn't tested much and no one cares about winning.

Ullrich was suspended a couple time for drugs though one of them was probably him partying.
 
2012-06-14 09:12:03 AM  

Mateorocks: I haven't heard a single person come to Armstrong's defense...he's got dozens of current and ex-cyclists saying he doped, they doped with him, etc.

But...he still never failed a test, and I must admit his denials of the accusations are about as close to being believable as I've ever heard.

That said, if he is found to have doped, it would be one of the worst conclusions to a sporting career ever.

He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.


The only ones saying that are the ones that have been sweated down by the USADA and then given deals to take down Armstring.
 
2012-06-14 09:12:54 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

 
2012-06-14 09:13:15 AM  

TheZorker: This guy gets "Randomly" tested at the end of almost every single stage of the last two TDF runs (as well as through the year) and has *always* been clean.

Give me a break.


When they design new PEDs they use the current tests to make sure the athletes won't get caught using them. It is often months to years before the test makers learn what is being used and can alter the test to detect the new substance.

It's the same reason B*rry B*nds never tested positive. His drugs were ahead of the test.
 
2012-06-14 09:14:47 AM  

Mateorocks: He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.


Maybe in France. No one in the US can work up that much care for cycling. More people followed it when Lance was winning every year but other than that it's very much a niche sport here.
 
2012-06-14 09:15:35 AM  
Doping should be like the ninja test in Naruto - if you cheat well enough, it's like you knew the answers. The only shame is getting caught.

I mean, that's pretty much how it works anyway, so might as well just admit it.

// fark, I just outed myself as having watched Naruto
 
2012-06-14 09:15:36 AM  

the_rev: Marcus Aurelius: lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.


I don't give a shiat if he doped or not. The point is that the USADA is dragging out accusations from confirmed liars with no other evidence whatsoever, accusations from people that cut deals with the USADA. The whole thing stinks of petty politics and hurt feelings from our "drug warriors".

Fark them.
 
2012-06-14 09:15:49 AM  
Ball
 
2012-06-14 09:18:51 AM  
I think this is the first Armstrong headline that has ever been on Fark that didn't make a testicle reference. This kind of forward-driven, non-cliché thinking is exactly the sort of thing that can sink a website built on repeating the same jokes over and over. You should be ashamed, Subby. No, really, you should. It's not like the "just kidding" line is fresh and creative.

Optimus Primate: His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)


There's no getting in front of something this big. His best bet, no matter what happens, is denial.
 
2012-06-14 09:20:54 AM  

you have pee hands: No one in the US can work up that much care for cycling.


I don't even care about cyclists that may or may not be directly in front of my car, I'm not going to waste time finding out who can use an archaically slow transportation device the fastest.
 
2012-06-14 09:22:55 AM  

Mateorocks: He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.


Not likely. As noted multiple times, everyone dopes in cycling. I'm sure Americans will be disappointed to find out that their great hero is no better than anyone else, if he should be found guilty, but other than that disappointment, nothing much will come of it from a PR perspective.
 
2012-06-14 09:23:38 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: Optimus Primate: He doped. They all doped. He was able to hide it very well, but he doped. You don't win 7 Tours in this day and age without enhancements.

His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)

What's going to really hurt him is losing the respect of all the fans. He has lied like a boss for so long... lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

His organization "Live Strong" will fold it's doors within the year as well, and it's a shame - it's a good one.

Goodbye, Lance Armstrong. And welcome...welcome to the ranks of The Shamed. The long list of cheats and liars who end up like Jose Canseco, struggling to get 500 dollar speaking gigs or tiny appearance fees. He will die an old, bitter man, filled with regret.

HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

Let me say that again: HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

This "investigation" is a load of horse shiat.


Pretty much this. He did pass all the drug tests. Saying "he had to be doping" is idiotic, and relying on the testimony of people who were caught doping, or have their own axes to grind is also idiotic.

At the end of the day, the tests are the only thing that can prove he was doping, and they say he wasn't.

Sadly, this isn't a criminal investigation, so it will have a different standard of proof (worse for Armstrong, it will pretty much be whatever the USADA decides, maybe even a coin flip). The dumbest thing about all of this is it's clearly a personal attack on Armstrong, because no matter what the outcome, he will be permanently tainted by the accusations, and the USADA looks like complete morans for pressing this issue 7 years after the fact, without a single bit of physical evidence.

At this point, whether he did it or not is completely irrelevant without that physical evidence. All you can do is tarnish the man with possibly false statements and make the ENTIRE SPORT look bad. Likewise, the USADA comes off looking like a huge joke, motivated by personal hatreds and self-interest.
 
2012-06-14 09:24:14 AM  
livingbehindthegates.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-06-14 09:25:38 AM  
sure just like france to give up and let the US try to win it for them. WWII all over again.

amidoinitright?

no for real, if he cheated it would be a big blow to all his fans. i dont care if everyone in the sport was doing it, that still doesnt make it right. i know he passed all his drug test back then and i hope that its proven that he was true to his word.
 
2012-06-14 09:25:57 AM  
i really want to belive he is clean, he is the most tested athlete in history and they have never found anything. this far past just seems like a witch hunt, are they going to go back and strip his world championship as well?
 
2012-06-14 09:29:19 AM  

Freakin Rican: sure just like france to give up and let the US try to win it for them. WWII all over again.

amidoinitright?

no for real, if he cheated it would be a big blow to all his fans. i dont care if everyone in the sport was doing it, that still doesnt make it right. i know he passed all his drug test back then and i hope that its proven that he was true to his word.


The USADA's entire "investigation" rests on the testimony of proven liars, so their conclusions will be worthless regardless of how they happen to rule. This is a big blow to the USADA, and no one else.
 
2012-06-14 09:30:02 AM  

Mateorocks: I haven't heard a single person come to Armstrong's defense...he's got dozens of current and ex-cyclists saying he doped, they doped with him, etc.

But...he still never failed a test, and I must admit his denials of the accusations are about as close to being believable as I've ever heard.

That said, if he is found to have doped, it would be one of the worst conclusions to a sporting career ever.

He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.


Just like when Barry Bonds turned out to have been juicing. The Giants fans all turned on him.

Oh, wait...
 
2012-06-14 09:32:21 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: Optimus Primate: He doped. They all doped. He was able to hide it very well, but he doped. You don't win 7 Tours in this day and age without enhancements.

His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)

What's going to really hurt him is losing the respect of all the fans. He has lied like a boss for so long... lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

His organization "Live Strong" will fold it's doors within the year as well, and it's a shame - it's a good one.

Goodbye, Lance Armstrong. And welcome...welcome to the ranks of The Shamed. The long list of cheats and liars who end up like Jose Canseco, struggling to get 500 dollar speaking gigs or tiny appearance fees. He will die an old, bitter man, filled with regret.

HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

Let me say that again: HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

This "investigation" is a load of horse shiat.


Sure, he passed the tests for "KNOWN" drugs just fine. Armstrong was at the top of the game, and had suppliers giving him sh*t that the testers didn't even know of. The reason they are making these charges is because they have PROOF that he cheated.

Don't worry, you poor little Armstrong apologist, it will all come out. I have a friend who works for UCI in Paris...he can't (won't) give me specifics, but he tells me that the evidence is undeniable. They have been sitting on everything for months prepping for this day. He fully admits they have a hardon for deposing the American that beat them at their own game, but it's not like they had to make anything up. This is a done deal.
 
2012-06-14 09:32:39 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: the_rev: Marcus Aurelius: lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

I don't give a shiat if he doped or not. The point is that the USADA is dragging out accusations from confirmed liars with no other evidence whatsoever, accusations from people that cut deals with the USADA. The whole thing stinks of petty politics and hurt feelings from our "drug warriors".

Fark them.


Yep.
 
2012-06-14 09:34:27 AM  

Freakin Rican: no for real, if he cheated it would be a big blow to all his fans.


Not really, based on this thread. He just became superpowerful after getting cancer and magically became capable of beating everyone else in the world.
 
2012-06-14 09:34:58 AM  

Resolute: Mateorocks: He'd be the most reviled athlete since OJ.

Not likely. As noted multiple times, everyone dopes in cycling. I'm sure Americans will be disappointed to find out that their great hero is no better than anyone else, if he should be found guilty, but other than that disappointment, nothing much will come of it from a PR perspective.


I don't know about that. There's a big group of Americans out there inspired by Lance's ability to beat cancer and win all those races. You might look at them as separate issues, but that seems difficult. People can relate to his recovery...where OJ was simply a popular celebrity.

If he's a fraud -- and I certainly hope he's not -- believing in anything he says or has said would be foolhardy.
 
2012-06-14 09:36:24 AM  

Optimus Primate: Marcus Aurelius: Optimus Primate: He doped. They all doped. He was able to hide it very well, but he doped. You don't win 7 Tours in this day and age without enhancements.

His "legacy" is over. He should just relinquish the titles now and try to get in front of this thing by becoming a big anti-doper and do the whole "tearful repentance™" spiel on national TV (expect an interview on a major network show within 6 months)

What's going to really hurt him is losing the respect of all the fans. He has lied like a boss for so long... lied to the faces of his fawning, admiring public with balls-out fearlessness.

His organization "Live Strong" will fold it's doors within the year as well, and it's a shame - it's a good one.

Goodbye, Lance Armstrong. And welcome...welcome to the ranks of The Shamed. The long list of cheats and liars who end up like Jose Canseco, struggling to get 500 dollar speaking gigs or tiny appearance fees. He will die an old, bitter man, filled with regret.

HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

Let me say that again: HE PASSED ALL HIS DRUG TESTS.

This "investigation" is a load of horse shiat.

Sure, he passed the tests for "KNOWN" drugs just fine. Armstrong was at the top of the game, and had suppliers giving him sh*t that the testers didn't even know of. The reason they are making these charges is because they have PROOF that he cheated.

Don't worry, you poor little Armstrong apologist, it will all come out. I have a friend who works for UCI in Paris...he can't (won't) give me specifics, but he tells me that the evidence is undeniable. They have been sitting on everything for months prepping for this day. He fully admits they have a hardon for deposing the American that beat them at their own game, but it's not like they had to make anything up. This is a done deal.


So, they've got a positive drug test, then? Or are they going to trot out Floyd Landis? Because the US DOJ already decided after a two year investigation that there's no case.
 
2012-06-14 09:36:55 AM  

Optimus Primate: The reason they are making these charges is because they have PROOF that he cheated.


According to USADA, they have no PROOF. They merely have evidence of the form "he said, she said". That's not proof, that's one person's word against the other. Especially considering that many people have axes to grind and would love nothing else than to knock a person of his pedestal.
 
2012-06-14 09:38:30 AM  

Guelph35: It's the same reason B*rry B*nds never tested positive. His drugs were ahead of the test.


Actually it's because MLB players weren't tested at all for them. Also there are things that can pick up when something isn't quite right with someone's blood. Don't need to have a specific molecule to look for.
 
2012-06-14 09:38:37 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: Freakin Rican: sure just like france to give up and let the US try to win it for them. WWII all over again.

amidoinitright?

no for real, if he cheated it would be a big blow to all his fans. i dont care if everyone in the sport was doing it, that still doesnt make it right. i know he passed all his drug test back then and i hope that its proven that he was true to his word.

The USADA's entire "investigation" rests on the testimony of proven liars, so their conclusions will be worthless regardless of how they happen to rule. This is a big blow to the USADA, and no one else.


You seem to really care about the USADA and its processes. People normally get this spun-up over the Republican Party or the Yankees or the Cowboys. But the USADA? What's gives? Someone you know get burned by them? Are you Lance Armstrong's Fark account?
 
2012-06-14 09:40:02 AM  

kidgenius: Optimus Primate: The reason they are making these charges is because they have PROOF that he cheated.

According to USADA, they have no PROOF. They merely have evidence of the form "he said, she said". That's not proof, that's one person's word against the other. Especially considering that many people have axes to grind and would love nothing else than to knock a person of his pedestal.


As far as I know, all the testimony comes from confirmed liars that were already busted by the USADA and cut a deal in exchange for their "testimony".
 
2012-06-14 09:41:23 AM  
This is the same undeniable evidence that hasn't worked for over a decade, right?

suuuuuuuuuuuuure
 
2012-06-14 09:42:02 AM  
Passing a drug test ≠ not doping
 
2012-06-14 09:44:28 AM  
Dope strong.
 
2012-06-14 09:45:28 AM  

Optimus Primate: Don't worry, you poor little Armstrong apologist, it will all come out. I have a friend who works for UCI in Paris...he can't (won't) give me specifics, but he tells me that the evidence is undeniable. They have been sitting on everything for months prepping for this day. He fully admits they have a hardon for deposing the American that beat them at their own game, but it's not like they had to make anything up. This is a done deal.


Are they going to apply the same tests to the samples of everyone else in the tour those years (it seems likely that if Lance was using, many other riders, or at least the guys on his team, would have been using the same things), or is this a single target investigation?
 
2012-06-14 09:46:12 AM  

ChrisDe: Passing a drug test ≠ not doping


These days though they aren't really testing for the presence of drugs. They are testing things like hormone levels, blood cell counts, etc. They test your body for the presence of naturally occurring substances, but in levels that are outside of the range. They are testing for the effects of the drugs, not the drugs themselves.
 
2012-06-14 09:47:01 AM  

Ricardo Klement: Marcus Aurelius: Freakin Rican: sure just like france to give up and let the US try to win it for them. WWII all over again.

amidoinitright?

no for real, if he cheated it would be a big blow to all his fans. i dont care if everyone in the sport was doing it, that still doesnt make it right. i know he passed all his drug test back then and i hope that its proven that he was true to his word.

The USADA's entire "investigation" rests on the testimony of proven liars, so their conclusions will be worthless regardless of how they happen to rule. This is a big blow to the USADA, and no one else.

You seem to really care about the USADA and its processes. People normally get this spun-up over the Republican Party or the Yankees or the Cowboys. But the USADA? What's gives? Someone you know get burned by them? Are you Lance Armstrong's Fark account?


What bothers me is that this crap is never ending. From my perspective, you drug test someone for a reason: to assure they're as clean as you can make them. If the drug test comes back negative, that's it. You're done. Sit down and shut up. These people just like seeing their names in the paper and are sore at Armstrong for being smarter than they are. Which isn't saying a lot. In short, the USADA is scum of the earth. I wish they would DIAF. I don't trust a single thing they say or a single witness they produce, for the simple reason that this is all petty politics.
 
2012-06-14 09:47:11 AM  

Optimus Primate: Sure, he passed the tests for "KNOWN" drugs just fine. Armstrong was at the top of the game, and had suppliers giving him sh*t that the testers didn't even know of. The reason they are making these charges is because they have PROOF that he cheated.


If that is the case, they should exhume the corpse of every TDF winner to check for "unknown doping agents at the time". You never know what will be found.
 
2012-06-14 09:47:29 AM  

you have pee hands: Are they going to apply the same tests to the samples of everyone else in the tour those years (it seems likely that if Lance was using, many other riders, or at least the guys on his team, would have been using the same things), or is this a single target investigation?


Seems like everyone else has already been busted. But no, I'm sure Armstrong was the only one running the Tour cleanly.
 
Displayed 50 of 168 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report