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(Daily Mail)   Meet the couple that is going to die violently in their sleep some day soon   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 171
    More: Dumbass, South African, body slams  
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25773 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jun 2012 at 12:39 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-14 04:43:41 PM  

FreakinB: CSB: My girlfriend works with somebody* who kept a snake as a pet and would let it free around the house, including at night. At one point, they noticed that the snake started to lie next to the bed at night, stretched out perfectly straight. They thought this was strange and asked a vet, who told them that the snake was actually sizing them up for an eventual meal.

No snakes for me. Ever.

*Or works with somebody who knows somebody. I don't remember. It's not important.


Dated a nurse, briefly, who kept a 10 foot Anaconda in her apartment. Had a head on him the size of an effing dinner plate. Supposedly liked to be petted. That tells you hot she was that I was willing to ....again, briefly .... ignore the giant GD snake in the living room in order to ... you know ... make the whoopee.

When we got busy turned out she was also mostly tattoo'd. And a natural red head. Turns out the snake and the tattoos were part of her weekend act in one of Atlanta's few "Gentleman's Clubs" down on Peachtree (1970s).

It was phenomenal, but I couldn't over that frigging snake. (shiver)

As for the couple and their cat?

How come the dumbest yokels have all the damn money? These freaks have a Lambo, for pity's sake. That's just not right ....
 
2012-06-14 05:00:57 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: How come the dumbest yokels have all the damn money? These freaks have a Lambo, for pity's sake.


They fit the profile of "old money", a.k.a. trust fund babies. Extremely entitled, very stupid, and often some of the most miserable creatures you'd ever have the misfortune to encounter. I pity them almost as often as I'm jealous.

My sister went to a private Midwestern school and I went to Michigan; we both got to know some of the breed. First-gen wealthy kids can be quite normal depending on how good their parents are. Second-gen TFBs are often sheltered from hardship so they completely lack coping mechanisms; they're extremely spoiled, easily traumatized (I mean like a thermostat set at 65 degrees in winter can give them a nervous breakdown) and have absurdly thin skins. By the time you get to third-gen or more, the family is thoroughly crazy. To give an example, one "old money" family showered their (second-born) daughter with gifts and attention to the extent of neglecting their firstborn son. Son started sexually abusing his sister in some twisted form of regaining control. Parents dealt with it by going into denial. Not a sane pair of genes in the whole family.

Exceptions abound, but the older the money, the crazier the derp. Something to think about when people call the rich "job creators".
 
2012-06-14 05:05:26 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: FreakinB: CSB: My girlfriend works with somebody* who kept a snake as a pet and would let it free around the house, including at night. At one point, they noticed that the snake started to lie next to the bed at night, stretched out perfectly straight. They thought this was strange and asked a vet, who told them that the snake was actually sizing them up for an eventual meal.

No snakes for me. Ever.

*Or works with somebody who knows somebody. I don't remember. It's not important.

Dated a nurse, briefly, who kept a 10 foot Anaconda in her apartment. Had a head on him the size of an effing dinner plate. Supposedly liked to be petted. That tells you hot she was that I was willing to ....again, briefly .... ignore the giant GD snake in the living room in order to ... you know ... make the whoopee.

When we got busy turned out she was also mostly tattoo'd. And a natural red head. Turns out the snake and the tattoos were part of her weekend act in one of Atlanta's few "Gentleman's Clubs" down on Peachtree (1970s).

It was phenomenal, but I couldn't over that frigging snake. (shiver)

As for the couple and their cat?

How come the dumbest yokels have all the damn money? These freaks have a Lambo, for pity's sake. That's just not right ....


Even if I had sufficient money, I wouldn't be using it for a Lamborghini. What's the rate of return on that outlay? Will it get you there any better than a Cadillac costing 1/8 as much? No, in fact it will do it neither as reliably nor as comfortably. Buying a Lamborghini is a little hint from the universe that maybe you're a dipshiat.
 
2012-06-14 05:11:26 PM  

FreakinB: CSB: My girlfriend works with somebody* who kept a snake as a pet and would let it free around the house, including at night. At one point, they noticed that the snake started to lie next to the bed at night, stretched out perfectly straight. They thought this was strange and asked a vet, who told them that the snake was actually sizing them up for an eventual meal.

No snakes for me. Ever.

*Or works with somebody who knows somebody. I don't remember. It's not important.


I question this vet's interpretation of the snake's behavior. There are only a couple of snake species that could ever look at an adult human as a potential meal (anaconda, reticulated python), and they are so large and potentially aggressive that letting them loose around the house is beyond ridiculous. The more popular pet breeds (ball pythons, boa constrictors) don't get large enough to eat humans. Even Burmese pythons, which have become a real problem in Florida, don't get big enough to eat a full-grown adult, although they might snatch up an unattended toddler. If this person was letting a reticulated python run loose around the house, he's an idiot. He probably wouldn't get eaten, but could easily get killed if the thing got in a bad mood.
 
2012-06-14 05:16:56 PM  
Forget the tiger. Look at that house! It's dangerously tacky!
 
2012-06-14 05:18:00 PM  
Tiger doesn't look that big. Looks like an adolescent, not an adult. But I'm not a tiger expert.
 
2012-06-14 05:41:07 PM  

Mose: Hell, not even a 40 lb coyote.


A dingo .... ate your baby
 
2012-06-14 06:40:29 PM  

gulogulo: CrazedHatter: . And as stupid as it is to own a tiger, I have a feeling if I had the means I'd still do it. I'm an idiot about Tigers though, such beautiful animals

I don't get this mentality from people who supposedly 'love' tigers. Why put them in an unnatural environment where they can't be a tiger?


gulogulo: gulogulo: CrazedHatter: . And as stupid as it is to own a tiger, I have a feeling if I had the means I'd still do it. I'm an idiot about Tigers though, such beautiful animals

I don't get this mentality from people who supposedly 'love' tigers. Why put them in an unnatural environment where they can't be a tiger?

Afterthought: I conclude that it's not that these people love tigers, they love the idea of themselves being a tiger owner. It's entirely selfish.


I agree with everything you said except for one piece. I don't love the idea of being a tiger owner, I just love the idea of tigers period. It is absolutely selfish and stupid, I would say as much right up front (In fact, I think I did - at least the stupid part) I freely admit it. What I -wouldn't- do is put the tiger in my damned house. I'd have to have a nice sized plot of land to let the thing play on, but be secured and protected as well.

I know exactly how selfish it would be, but if I had the means, I'd still do it, as I said I'm an idiot for Tigers.
 
2012-06-14 08:47:23 PM  
And when it dies -

cdn2-b.examiner.com
 
2012-06-14 10:21:01 PM  

70Ford: And when it dies -

[cdn2-b.examiner.com image 600x360]


They're gonna turn Enzo into the SHIELD Helicarrier?
 
2012-06-14 10:44:43 PM  
If I had that much money, I'd probably also have exotic pets, in my volcanic lair.
 
2012-06-14 11:10:14 PM  
Look, I think tigers and other large cats are incredibly awesome, and as much as I would be tempted by an idea like this, it is COMPLETELY FARKING STUPID to keep one as a housecat. Even putting the cost and proper care of such an animal aside, it is highly liable to fark you up terribly at some point, whether accidentally or on purpose. It might love you and be cute 99.9% of the time, but the one time that it doesn't think it's funny when you grab its favorite toy, the repercussions will be lethal.
 
2012-06-15 12:40:48 AM  

khitsicker: The real reason they deserve to die is that they have a pet tiger and didnt name him Hobbes.


Or Talky Tawny
 
2012-06-15 04:54:14 AM  
i849.photobucket.com

Someone/something is going to die
 
2012-06-15 09:28:42 AM  
blog.geico.com

theawesomer.com
 
2012-06-15 12:33:07 PM  

dragonchild: offmymeds: Seriously though, I'll never understand the thinking behind "Hey, let's keep a potentially lethal animal as a house pet!" WTF?

Elephants can crush you effortlessly, yet people have used elephants for centuries. The wild part is more relevant. Wolverines aren't that big but you should always treat one as if it can kill you.

That said, it's possible to keep a big, wild, lethal animal as a pet. The people who do, however, are generally experts who respect the animals and take necessary precautions. If a tiger starts misbehaving, the one time it decides to contest your authority will be over real quick.



Elephants (like oxen, horses, camels, etc.) are already social animals, and are not carnivores. Even so, IIRC, the African elephant is extremely difficult to train, and even the Asian elephant cannot be entirely tamed, and occasionally injures or kills a handler, either accidentally or in a moment of anger.

/before anyone posts thatsracist.gif, it's utterly unrelated to humans. Modern-day elephants are members of two different genera; humans are one species.
 
2012-06-15 01:22:49 PM  

Isildur: dragonchild: offmymeds: Seriously though, I'll never understand the thinking behind "Hey, let's keep a potentially lethal animal as a house pet!" WTF?

Elephants can crush you effortlessly, yet people have used elephants for centuries. The wild part is more relevant. Wolverines aren't that big but you should always treat one as if it can kill you.

That said, it's possible to keep a big, wild, lethal animal as a pet. The people who do, however, are generally experts who respect the animals and take necessary precautions. If a tiger starts misbehaving, the one time it decides to contest your authority will be over real quick.


Elephants (like oxen, horses, camels, etc.) are already social animals, and are not carnivores. Even so, IIRC, the African elephant is extremely difficult to train, and even the Asian elephant cannot be entirely tamed, and occasionally injures or kills a handler, either accidentally or in a moment of anger.

/before anyone posts thatsracist.gif, it's utterly unrelated to humans. Modern-day elephants are members of two different genera; humans are one species.


So, Babar was a true story about some of our ancestors?
 
2012-06-15 08:06:16 PM  

Grables'Daughter: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x462]

If they get into trouble, she can just stab the tiger with her nose.


Spewing my coke all over the carpet...
 
2012-06-16 12:27:46 AM  
Okay, yes, I'm very late to the party, but really - nobody?

cdn.svcs.c2.uclick.com
 
2012-06-16 03:58:43 AM  

Fano: Elephants (like oxen, horses, camels, etc.) are already social animals, and are not carnivores. Even so, IIRC, the African elephant is extremely difficult to train, and even the Asian elephant cannot be entirely tamed, and occasionally injures or kills a handler, either accidentally or in a moment of anger.

/before anyone posts thatsracist.gif, it's utterly unrelated to humans. Modern-day elephants are members of two different genera; humans are one species.

So, Babar was a true story about some of our ancestors?



Of course. In more modern times his kingdom was renamed "Pachystan".

/my prior disclaimer may seem odd and unnecessary, but I was recalling Michael Moore's insinuation in "Bowling for Columbine" that "Africanized bees" news reports were racist
//The Babar books were some of my favorite books, when I was a kid.
 
2012-06-16 04:08:20 AM  

Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Snow Goon: Okay, yes, I'm very late to the party, but really - nobody?

[cdn.svcs.c2.uclick.com image 600x190]


Hah! Nice. khitsicker did mention Hobbes, but that strip is particularly appropriate.

/on a related note, nice username
 
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