If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(My Fox DC)   Oh, you don't mop the floors with baby oil? My bad   (myfoxdc.com) divider line 56
    More: Fail, Fairfax County, graduation  
•       •       •

9160 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jun 2012 at 1:36 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



56 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-14 01:01:30 AM
Babies are small. You can't get a lot of oil from one.
 
2012-06-14 01:38:19 AM
that's a lot o lube.
 
2012-06-14 01:40:03 AM
Here's some helpful advice, grads.

The ceremony doesn't mean jack shiat. You'll get your diploma either way.

Use the time to buy some condoms. Meet your friends after the ceremony for parties, drinking, and sex.

Missing your graduation ceremony isn't the end of the world, nor is it going to mess up your life. Having a kid will, so make sure you use those condoms.
 
2012-06-14 01:44:32 AM
did it hit the anus?
 
2012-06-14 01:45:34 AM
But then how will I keep the babies I'm stomping on from sticking to the floor?
 
2012-06-14 01:46:30 AM
I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.
 
2012-06-14 01:50:31 AM
If Gosh didn't want us to eat baby oil, he wouldn't have made it taste so delicious.
 
2012-06-14 01:53:00 AM

Bucky Katt: Babies are small. You can't get a lot of oil from one.


Yeah, but they're fun to make more of.
 
2012-06-14 01:54:00 AM
Blimey, whatever did I give the wife?
 
2012-06-14 01:54:20 AM
"Put baby oil on the floor and everyone would slip and slide through the hallway and have a good time broken hip."
 
2012-06-14 01:58:26 AM
I'm waiting for someone to set up a prank with a few gallons of polyurethane foam.

Or at least, starting with a few gallons of liquid precursors.
 
2012-06-14 02:05:10 AM
I skipped my graduation and went fishing.
 
2012-06-14 02:10:44 AM
Shoemaker, who, because of AP courses, had a better than 4.0 grade point average during his senior year

Heh. This happened to two of our valedictorians in HS. They got caught with alcohol in their hotel room during the model UN senior year and weren't allowed to go to the ceremony. The funny part was these two kids were the most straight-laced pair of Asians I'd ever met. They NEVER drank, that I saw (and it's not like we didn't try to get them to).
 
2012-06-14 02:14:17 AM

Ass_Master_Flash: did it hit the anus?


Dude. They're not going to Penn State.

Too soon.
 
2012-06-14 02:16:26 AM

fusillade762: Shoemaker, who, because of AP courses, had a better than 4.0 grade point average during his senior year

Heh. This happened to two of our valedictorians in HS. They got caught with alcohol in their hotel room during the model UN senior year and weren't allowed to go to the ceremony. The funny part was these two kids were the most straight-laced pair of Asians I'd ever met. They NEVER drank, that I saw (and it's not like we didn't try to get them to).


Yup, our valedictorian got drunk at the rival high school's homecoming and couldn't walk or go to your prom.
 
2012-06-14 02:17:48 AM

9beers: I skipped my graduation and went fishing.


You and me both, buddy. They are excruciatingly boring. You still get your piece of paper.
 
2012-06-14 02:19:16 AM

fusillade762: The funn


Were they Russia?

My boyfriend was USSR one year. He also got to be Iraq, Lebanon, and some other middle eastern country.
 
2012-06-14 02:40:10 AM

mhuckins: fusillade762: The funn

Were they Russia?

My boyfriend was USSR one year. He also got to be Iraq, Lebanon, and some other middle eastern country.


Your spaceport boyfreind? Imma tell China Lake and they'll blow him up good for that.
 
2012-06-14 02:40:28 AM
There are a lot of feelings I have towards this particular case.

I think that not letting them walk is stupid, it's not like they're going to learn a lesson from it, they've already passed the classes.

i think that anyone who cares enough to biatch about not being able to walk is stupid, it's a ceremony, only your parents care about it, and who cares what they think.

I think putting baby oil on the floors is an awesome idea, think of all the people you get to watch eating shiat from being stupid enough to assume a surface isn't covered in baby oil.

I think putting baby oil on the floors is a terrible idea, think of all the possible chipped teeth and broken bones.

I think schools are being far too dictatorship-ey on students, they're dumb kids, let them be dumb kids.

I think schools are being not nearly dictatorship-ey enough on students, think of the possible lawsuits, and how those injuries could affect someones' life.

I think I've drank the perfect amount of beer to still be somewhat coherent.

I think I've drank just slightly too much beer, but that's not going to stop me from drinking more.
 
2012-06-14 02:41:28 AM
Baby oil goes on certain portions of my physical anatomical person after swimming. Not on the floor.
 
2012-06-14 02:52:09 AM

mhuckins: fusillade762: The funn

Were they Russia?

My boyfriend was USSR one year. He also got to be Iraq, Lebanon, and some other middle eastern country.


I don't remember. I think one of them may have been Bahrain.
 
2012-06-14 03:01:12 AM

mikaloyd: mhuckins: fusillade762: The funn

Were they Russia?

My boyfriend was USSR one year. He also got to be Iraq, Lebanon, and some other middle eastern country.

Your spaceport boyfreind? Imma tell China Lake and they'll blow him up good for that.


He's not affiliated with China Lake. Now those NASA Dryden folks might want to speak to him.

/yay Mojave!
 
2012-06-14 03:20:54 AM
"It was a stupid prank, but, like, I still think they should 'walk' because, I mean, no one got hurt at all. No one got hurt."
Surely a retard that talks like this isn't graduating??
 
2012-06-14 03:24:32 AM
What's stopping these kids from showing up at graduation anyway?

Barge in to the graduation ceremony, announce your own name, shake hands with the principal, grab your "diploma" and leave.

What are they going to do? Suspend you?
 
2012-06-14 04:34:12 AM
Oh god, that was my high school. And I knew that kid's older sister when I was there. This prank is only marginally less lame than the one my class did. What a disgrace.

Back in the 70's some kids disassembled a VW Beetle and reassembled it on the roof of the school, back when there used to be a working auto shop class on campus. Those were the glory years, before the PC-tards took over public schools.
 
2012-06-14 06:24:17 AM
Graduation ceremonies are boring and pointless, as far as I'm concerned. Maybe this is some kind of Bre'r Rabbit approach. "Oh, please, Mr. School Administrator, give me community service or ANYTHING, but please whatever you do, don' take away my graduation ceremony. Letting me sleep in that day and play video games or go to the mall would be the worst thing ever!"
 
2012-06-14 06:47:58 AM

HotWingAgenda: Oh god, that was my high school. And I knew that kid's older sister when I was there. This prank is only marginally less lame than the one my class did. What a disgrace.

Back in the 70's some kids disassembled a VW Beetle and reassembled it on the roof of the school, back when there used to be a working auto shop class on campus. Those were the glory years, before the PC-tards took over public schools.


Oh I am so tired of hearing that regurgitated bullshiat story. Yeah, man. My school too. I heard all about it.
 
2012-06-14 07:04:33 AM

9beers: I skipped my graduation and went fishing.


I didn't go to graduation either, but wished I had done something as fun as going fishing. Two days before the ceremony I moved to the college town where I would be spending the next 4 years to start a full time summer job and to take a couple of classes. I failed to get permission to skip the ceremony and forfeited the piece of parchment, which I cared exactly nothing about. 15 years later at my nephew's graduation, I went to the office and asked for my diploma. They still had it but insisted that they take a pic of me receiving it. Pissed me off, didn't want to, but I did it to please my mom.
 
2012-06-14 07:21:05 AM
at my school i skateboarded down the auditorium to the stage took a dump and wiped my ass on the American flag.
 
2012-06-14 07:32:49 AM
At the time it seems important to the graduate and the parents but years after you graduate you realize it doesn't mean JACK SQUAT and you getting suspended from graduation is a much better story. Oh and you still get your diploma.

/you just saved your parents from sitting in traffic for an hour.
 
2012-06-14 07:46:59 AM
When I was a kid we had a kitchen that like like the long tetris block. straight through to two rooms. One day me and my brother waxed the floor with pledge and murphy's oil soap, and took turns runnning across the room and then sliding across the kitchen in our socks. We had fun for a while, then went off to do something else, forgetting all about the kitchen. Mom then came home with a bag of grocieries. And promptly landed on her ass while spilling stuff everywhere. There was an ass whupping that night.
 
2012-06-14 08:11:51 AM
So a complete idiot can get a 4.0 these days? Color me surprised.
 
2012-06-14 08:30:33 AM
Bucky Katt
Babies are small. You can't get a lot of oil from one.


You gotta run them through the wringer feet first. Crank it slowly. Don't mind the noise. It gets quit when the air gets crushed out of the lungs.

Baby: It's a renewable resource.
 
2012-06-14 08:43:04 AM
Okay a few things:

1. I know this kid. Have since he was born. His oldest sister used to be my best friend from 1st grade to when she moved to Atlanta GA and popped out her own kid and we grew apart.

2. I went to this high school. Herndon has always had this rule in place. Senior pranks get you a 7 day suspension. Doesn't matter what the prank is. This isn't anything new.

3. They were idiots for doing it so close to graduation. Pull it at the beginning of the year and your suspension doesn't run into you walking. However, just because they had a temporary lapse of judgement doesn't mean that they are actually "stupid" as some of you point out. Chris is probably one of the brightest kids I know, and AP classes at Herndon are no farking joke.

Everyone does ill advised stuff every once and a while. Think of your last one night stand...
 
2012-06-14 08:44:34 AM
We used to put regular dish soap in the dishwasher and turn it on, foam hallway fun!

We also would dump a few bottles of dish soap into a nearby water utility's outdoor water fountain. It was on a hill overlooking a highway, the entire hill would be full of foam.

/end of my dish soap pranks.
 
2012-06-14 08:45:22 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.


To be fair, the punishment doesn't fit the crime. It's a blanket 7 day suspension for doing a senior prank. Comparatively speaking, I had a friend who punched another chick at the face who only got 3 days out of school, and the chick who spiked the drinks at prom only got 1 day in school. Dumb.
 
2012-06-14 08:57:16 AM
i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-14 08:57:55 AM

Buffet: "It was a stupid prank, but, like, I still think they should 'walk' because, I mean, no one got hurt at all. No one got hurt."
Surely a retard that talks like this isn't graduating??


With that sort of reading comprehension, I think your question better applies to you. FTA:

Sophomore Bryce Webb disagreed: "It was a stupid prank, but, like, I still think they should 'walk' because, I mean, no one got hurt at all. No one got hurt."
 
2012-06-14 09:01:33 AM

skilbride: The My Little Pony Killer: I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.

To be fair, the punishment doesn't fit the crime. It's a blanket 7 day suspension for doing a senior prank. Comparatively speaking, I had a friend who punched another chick at the face who only got 3 days out of school, and the chick who spiked the drinks at prom only got 1 day in school. Dumb.


Clearly, the punishment is not harsh enough, since the entire point is to deter pranks in the first place.
 
2012-06-14 09:03:12 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.


Oh come the fark on, the ringleader has a 4.0+ GPA. They made a bad decision; from what I understand, teenagers are good at that.
 
2012-06-14 09:04:32 AM
I use baby oil when I shave my legs in the shower (Dont mock it till you've tried it) and having slipped and fallen quite horribly, quite often, I can say it hurts. Yes as pranks go it was not tremendously stupid but it would not have been exactly slip slidey fun for everyone at all. Just wait for the person to bounce their head off some badly placed window/shelf/toilet seat and watch the blood bath commence.
But as no one was hurt, did these kids really deserve such punishment?
 
2012-06-14 09:27:05 AM
I found both my high school and college graduation ceremonies a bit of a let-down actually.

My take: "The graduating class has worked to get this far...attention should be on US."
Yet the 'star of the show', so to speak was the person they'd gotten to give the address. Especially when at my college commencement a great deal of the ceremony went into investing the speaker with an 'honorary' Ph.D in something-or other.

Did they really need us there for that?
Cause if they didn't, it was a nice day, the relatives were in town and there was plenty of touristy stuff to do...

/ Did get to meet Janet Reno and shake her hand...
// She is very tall.
 
2012-06-14 10:15:48 AM

Carn: The My Little Pony Killer: I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.

Oh come the fark on, the ringleader has a 4.0+ GPA. They made a bad decision; from what I understand, teenagers are good at that.


Yes and they should be punished for it, not getting to attend graduation is appropriate, otherwise how will they learn. This is a teaching moment, and the lesson is do something stupid get punished.
 
2012-06-14 10:24:02 AM

Slaves2Darkness: Carn: The My Little Pony Killer: I like how the idiot parents seem to think that they can dictate what the punishment should be. If they had any idea of how to get messages across to their kids in the first place, they wouldn't be missing out on their graduation ceremony now.

Oh come the fark on, the ringleader has a 4.0+ GPA. They made a bad decision; from what I understand, teenagers are good at that.

Yes and they should be punished for it, not getting to attend graduation is appropriate, otherwise how will they learn. This is a teaching moment, and the lesson is do something stupid get punished.


I totally agree. My comment was disagreeing with the other poster's statement that the parents are horrible people and failed utterly at their jobs. They clearly got some thing(s) right if they have a kid with those kind of grades. Smart kids often get bored and do stupid things in high school.

/was one of those kids
 
2012-06-14 11:46:17 AM

cakeman: at my school i skateboarded down the auditorium to the stage took a dump and wiped my ass on the American flag.


Yeah but, I mean, no one got hurt at all. No one got hurt.
 
2012-06-14 01:02:44 PM

9beers: I skipped my graduation and went fishing.


At first glance, I thought you went fisting.
 
2012-06-14 01:26:15 PM

BarkingUnicorn: 9beers: I skipped my graduation and went fishing.

At first glance, I thought you went fisting.


That was later in the evening.
 
2012-06-14 02:34:42 PM
Schools don't have any sense of humor nowadays. If he called in a fake bomb threat, I could understand. But putting baby oil on the floor? And no one even got hurt? That's just asinine.
 
2012-06-14 03:34:15 PM
I knew someone that somehow got a key to the soda vending machines and refilled all of them with beer.
 
2012-06-14 04:53:11 PM

9beers: I skipped my graduation and went fishing.


same here
 
Displayed 50 of 56 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report