Yuri Futanari: Remember this the next time you turn out the lights, grab the tissues, and ejaculate all over the memory of what was once a proud people.

LOL. As I read through that I was just thinking that it sounded more and more like a church pamphlet on the evils of porn, and when I got to that line at the end I understood that it was just a very good parody. *golfclap*
Bravo.

rubi_con_man: I knew a bunch of gals in HS who weren't ever going to be lesbians for life, but who found each other's erotic company suitable.

Pics or it didn't happen!

Quite obviously to the intelligent, this ad is just a ploy to get (stupid) people to pay more for a Mac than they otherwise would. Nothin' wrong with taking money from stupid people.

TheBigJerk: This fine upstanding citizen should be placed on a pedestal erected in her honor, for she is truly a Real American. Showing the turgid spirit of brotherly love she castigates and defies the sin while showing tumescent love for the sinner. In the spirit of a good shepherd she tenderly cares for her flock, grabbing hold of the rod and the staff to

That's all I needed.

Genevieve Marie: And for what it's worth, I enjoy every single one of my Apple products. They are shiny, and fun, and they all work together very well.

The main exception being iTunes on Mac. (And the lack of some iTunes features on iOS devices.) It's just as wretched as the PC version, which is surprising, since the Mac Quicktime is shining gem of beauty compared to the PC Quicktime.

serial_crusher:
3) He's just going to take that laptop into his room and look at some very very high definition gay porn.

Porn, gay or otherwise, is in no way improved by high definition.

Yuri Futanari: This wouldn't be a problem is there wasn't so much pornography in this world.

Let's face it folks, we're becoming a nation of perverts and pedophiles. Every single one of you who has ever browsed Satan's internet is responsible for the death of our purity and the rise of unclean sexual practices like masturbation, sodomy, etc...

Pornography feeds lust of the eyes and lust of the flesh, which are never satisfied. It leaves the viewer craving more and more in order to achieve the same "sexual high." It easily enslaves people to their own cravings and opens the door to other forms of evil, like anger, abuse, violence, hatred, lying, envy, compulsiveness and selfishness. The power behind porn is revealed when the porn addict tries to stop their habit - it is virtually impossible without help.

Pornography sexualizes the viewer's mindset. It warps and perverts their perspective such that sex is unnaturally elevated in their thoughts. Porn's images are stamped into viewer's brain with the aid of hormones released during sexual arousal. Even if a person decides to stop looking at porn, the past images can remain for years or even a lifetime.

Pornography intensifies an individual's drive to serve oneself, rather than serve others. For example, masturbation, which typically accompanies looking at pornography reinforces a self-centered sexual orientation (i.e. lust), which can detract from a person's ability to give and receive love.

Looking at porn will increase the viewer's tendency to lie, because he or she will have a natural desire to keep it secret to avoid criticism, embarrassment, shame and/or having to surrender their habit.

Remember this the next time you turn out the lights, grab the tissues, and ejaculate all over the memory of what was once a proud people.

Love your handle, BTW...

angrycrank: serial_crusher:
3) He's just going to take that laptop into his room and look at some very very high definition gay porn.

Porn, gay or otherwise, is in no way improved by high definition.

I would argue that lesbian porn would be. Close up lady-on-lady bits in HD? Yes please. Wrinkled hairy man balls slapping around? No.

/NTTAWWT

Because People in power are Stupid: Yeah, without reading the article I'm going to say that Mac is more effeminate than PC. I'm not saying gay because gays aren't necessarily effeminate.

If anything, the gays these days are almost all MUCH more masculine than all but the most macho of Latin gangsters. Hipsters have completely taken over the effeminate fairy demographic, while the jailhouse gays are as fat and unloved as ever.

what's a gay??

aedude01:
I completely believe that this is real. Mainly because I told my parents I'd go straight for a new car in college. They bought me one.

For karma's sake, I hope you got to play with lots and lots of dick in that car.

LasersHurt: Yuri Futanari: angrycrank: serial_crusher:
3) He's just going to take that laptop into his room and look at some very very high definition gay porn.

Porn, gay or otherwise, is in no way improved by high definition.

I would argue that lesbian porn would be. Close up lady-on-lady bits in HD? Yes please. Wrinkled hairy man balls slapping around? No.

/NTTAWWT

I maintain there is a point of diminishing returns on pornographic definition, and it's roughly in the neighborhood of anal razor burn.

I think in the interest of science that this warrants further study. I'll begin gathering materials and conducting research immediately.

/in my bunk

Lmao the OL.

So many gullible tards of Fark.

It's not confirmed as real but OH THE OUTRAGE.

wildcardjack


Step 1) Gain access to someone's personal email account.
Step 2) Post something inflammatory to Craigslist and use email account to confirm it.
Step 3) Tip off a blogger that would be inflamed by the ad.
Step 4) Laugh your ass off as your mark from step 1 gets flooded with raunchy emails.

So much this. Seriously, the post is from Culver Freakin City. Which is, you know, right smack between Sony Studios and Venice Beach. Not exactly the land of the homophobes and bigots.

angrycrank: serial_crusher:
3) He's just going to take that laptop into his room and look at some very very high definition gay porn.

Porn, gay or otherwise, is in no way improved by high definition.

Dave Chappelle Mac Commercial

LordJiro: So if he stops being gay, why would he WANT a Macbook?

/oh come on, it was too easy.

Came in to make this point. If you don't love the taste of cock any more, you won't want a Macbook.

To be fair - gay porn looks much better on a retina display.

accelerus: Apple can come out with a new macbook every year and only change some minor specification on it


you really consider the new MacBook Pro to be a minor specification change? ooooookay.

Being gay isn't a choice. Living a gay lifestyle is a choice. There are positive and negative consequences of living the lifestyle.

TheBigJerk: This fine upstanding citizen should be placed on a pedestal erected in her honor, for she is truly a Real American. Showing the turgid spirit of brotherly love she castigates and defies the sin while showing tumescent love for the sinner. In the spirit of a good shepherd she tenderly cares for her flock, grabbing hold of the rod and the staff to bring comfort and succor to one who is suffering under the throbbing weight of his sin. Rather than drive her child from her with the hard flagellations of punishment and hate she gently embraces him with secret enticements of the delicious fruit of a proper, faithful life. God willing, he shall soon be on his knees, seeking the glorious libation of the waters of life, and seeking comfort in the strong and mighty embrace of his divine and lordly glory. He will take the essence of the holy spirit into himself and be cleansed of the stain of sinful degradation.

Sorry was that too much or not enough? I'm running out of steam...

::golf clap::

The ad is not faked - you can read that in the Update at the bottom of the story.

As for Apple v. Mac - I use the tools I need to get the job done. The specific tool I need to do my specific job requires a Mac. I have tried using PCs to do my job, but it's like trying to use a Philips head screwdriver where I need a hammer - it doesn't work very well. And no matter how you dress it up, a screwdriver will never be a hammer.

WordyGrrl: foo monkey: Being gay isn't a choice. Living a gay lifestyle is a choice. There are positive and negative consequences of living the lifestyle.

Like marrying your beard so she can handle the PR when you get caught juggling trucker balls at the Flying J you can be a Mormon?

FTFY

foo monkey: Being gay isn't a choice. Living a gay lifestyle is a choice. There are positive and negative consequences of living the lifestyle.

What, pray tell is a "gay lifestyle"... I worked today, then played diablo... I also grilled burgers... I like to put the cheddar cheese on while they're on the grill because it's farking awesome.

Sounds fake, but to a certain degree parents are free to raise their kids as they see fit. If their child is gay they can try to bribe or cajole the kid to be straight. It is their prerogative as parents.

/Not condoning such activity

Was the irony tag broken?

/i keed, i keed

aedude01: serial_crusher: I'm calling fake on this. Anybody who makes enough money to be able to afford a mac book is surely also smart enough to realize that posting the phrase "I don't want to get a ton of messages from you guys" on Craigslist is an invitation to get flamed, regardless of how stupid the thing you say after it is.

But, pretending it's serious:
1) Depending on the kid's age, she should be offended that he's involved in any sexual activity.
2) If he's old enough to be having sexual activity, he's old enough to go get a job and buy his own damned computer.
3) He's just going to take that laptop into his room and look at some very very high definition gay porn.

I completely believe that this is real. Mainly because I told my parents I'd go straight for a new car in college. They bought me one.

/Suckers.
//No I don't feel bad about it. They sent me to two years of "ex-gay" therapy beforehand.

If no one else is going to, I'll do it myself: what kind of car was it?

LordJiro: So if he stops being gay, why would he WANT a Macbook?

/oh come on, it was too easy.

Done in six! Goodnight folks!

seventypercent: firefly212: What, pray tell is a "gay lifestyle"... I worked today, then played diablo... I also grilled burgers... I like to put the cheddar cheese on while they're on the grill because it's farking awesome.

I'm guessing it has something to do with show tunes, gerbils, and amyl nitrate poppers.

There's that effeminate stereotype again. For some of us, the lifestyle involves crushed oxycodone, bluegrass, PVC pipe and rabbits.

His dog should have been a pretty big hint...

firefly212:
Do you have anything to back this up? I mean... anything at all? Gotta be blunt, my whole family is a bunch of Irish Catholic Marines and Soldiers... being gay wasn't exactly a popular choice when I figured it out... I mean, I have straight friends, and no... nobody's saying "lets go be gay for the thrill of it"... I have bi friends who have had deep and meaningful relationships with people of either gender, but again even they seem constantly torn and tend to be rather timid about it. I mean, make no mistake about it, there's nothing "popular" or easy about coming out... the suicide rates for gay teens are extraordinarily high, they deal with getting bullied not just by peers, but by their own parents in many cases... the idea that it would be such a light and frilly choice seems just absurd to me.

You're absolutely correct, it is not popular or easy coming out but I don't think that's what he was talking about. the (fake) boy in this ad didn't come out, he was caught. I can't speak to statistical data, only from personal experience which is to say when I was in high school (10 years ago in the bible belt) there were many people that I knew who experimented with their sexuality because of the taboo associated with it. They would discuss it quietly with their peers and at most it would hit the rumor mill in the lunch room, but it was never something they would outright claim especially to an adult. For some people it is a light and frilly choice, because it is a choice for them.

Okay, i can't get laid, so there's no homosexual activity in my life.

Where the hell is my MacBook?

Now there's gonna be all these people who post "It Gets Better" videos who subsequently kill themselves.

I wonder if they'd buy me a new computer if I promise not to have gay sex...

Screw that, I'd rather be gay. It beats a new anything any day. I could forget my laptop at home, but my gayness goes with my everywhere.

/except my gaydar. It's been buggy lately. I've been keeping it in the closet until I can get it fixed.

ProfessorOhki: aedude01:

I completely believe that this is real. Mainly because I told my parents I'd go straight for a new car in college. They bought me one.

/Suckers.
//No I don't feel bad about it. They sent me to two years of "ex-gay" therapy beforehand.

If no one else is going to, I'll do it myself: what kind of car was it?



Nothing gay about this vehicle.

amo: aedude01: Genevieve Marie: aedude01: Genevieve Marie: aedude01: //No I don't feel bad about it. They sent me to two years of "ex-gay" therapy beforehand.

You earned that car.

Did they ever come around and accept you?

Nope, they still find me and my "lifestyle" unacceptable. My boyfriend is not invited to Christmas/family functions/etc.

Fun side story: My little brother came out to me a few weeks ago (Mom & Dad don't know yet). He also has a boyfriend and is planning on telling my parents in a few weeks, once he's moved into his new place (he just graduated from college). They've looked to him as their golden child for years (for grandkids etc.) and now they have no "backup" kids.

Karma is amazing sometimes.

That sucks. It really sucks- and who knows, maybe you and your brother can start new Christmas/family functions at one of your houses. Invite them, and if they want to come and see you guys for the holidays, they'll have to get over it.

I hope things change eventually. It has to suck to carry all that hatred and confusion around.

Thanks, yea I think that's what we're going to end up having to do. We'll see how things go in a few weeks.

I wish you the best of luck, there. It's sad to say, but if they can't see past their own bigotry, you might be better off without them.

Yeah I sometimes think my parents were wasted in us. They honestly wouldn't care if I brought home another man to visit them as long as he wasn't abusive. Problem is all of us are straight. (I think anyway. I have no idea about my autistic brother other than the fact he's into furry vore. That caused my eyes to bleed when I saw it.)

Didn't he know there is nothing more gay than a macbook?

Foundling: Okay, i can't get laid, so there's no homosexual activity in my life.

Where the hell is my MacBook?

If you want to score start hanging around churches and other such conservative lairs.

aedude01: They sent me to two years of "ex-gay" therapy beforehand.

I'd be interested in setting up "fake" gay-away therapy/camp/etc. I haven't worked out a detailed plan yet -- presumably I just need a face man with an appropriate religious affiliation and a "How I Learned to Stop Sucking Cock and Love the God" story -- but I'd seriously be willing to put up some capital to get such a thing going. It would not only help gay children that are being forced into such camps, but the whole thing could be self-funding while depriving "real" gay-away camps of revenue.