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(Huffington Post)   Maybe it's time to re-evaluate if your sex life is too rough when people stumble upon your sex chamber and mistake it for a crime scene   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 386
    More: Obvious, swedish, BDSM, free country, Swedish language, Aftonbladet, Dee Severe, HuffPost, limping  
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18051 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jun 2012 at 5:45 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-13 07:18:41 PM  
The people who get to be the "Dom" in these situations are clearly just running a racket. I'm going to start a club called Barry's House of Fun. Only straight chicks with big mouths can apply. I'll chain these hoes down and just show up and have their punishment be sucking my cack while I do whatever I want. I'll slap you around a bit if you complain. Any takers?
 
2012-06-13 07:19:01 PM  

Need Help Soonish: What about "foreskin" ???


Sandpaper and rubbing alcohol, of course silly.

wink
 
2012-06-13 07:19:35 PM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Need Help Soonish: Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.

OR!

We could kill zombies on the couch for a couple of hours while drinking rum, go to the bathroom, engage in oral, anal, and fisting while showering, then finish up with our girlfriend a few hours later when she shows up.

///I like my way better thank you...
///also, romantic comedies are a scourge upon our society :/

Your party does sound much more fun.


Just remember the coconut oil... and all will be well :)
 
2012-06-13 07:20:14 PM  

Matthew Keene: One time, some years ago I was handcuffed and shackled in a red speedo, and taken out to a restaurant by my dom. Wow, that was quite thrilling. We did get a few looks.


Amateur. :)

seriousbondage.com
 
2012-06-13 07:20:33 PM  

Matthew Keene: My best experience was a taser to the balls once. I'm actually up for that again. It was awesome.


Well you are easily pleased. It is really not that hard to buy a taser to keep yourself amused. You should be rolling around on the carpet right now instead of posting here.
 
2012-06-13 07:21:19 PM  
craiggarner.com

or GTFO!
 
2012-06-13 07:21:21 PM  

Sensei Can You See: Matthew Keene: You might want to consider leaving this thread, then. We're just getting started.

[assets.diylol.com image 510x477]


weknowmemes.com

I always liked this version...
 
2012-06-13 07:21:26 PM  

ph0rk: Thelyphthoric: Maybe it's time to re-evaluate your sex life if you think having a sex chamber as awesome as that is "too rough"

As awesome as what? all I see is a file photo.


As awesome as the image of it was in my head along with the hot willing Swedish lady, naturally.
 
2012-06-13 07:21:42 PM  

LazerFish: I dated a girl that ran a sex toy shop. She was into whips and paddles and bondage... I was cool with that. But when I saw her naked (specifically without panties), i found out she liked cutting herself. Freaked me out, so i left and never talked to her again.
Also, I seem to attract women who like to bite/be bitten (even before the vampire craze). Is that common among females?


I don't know about in the general populace. If you get someone into being bitten and you are willing to accommodate her try the back of the neck. There are quite a few female submissives who react pretty much the same as a receptive female cat to male cat biting them on the back of the neck.
 
2012-06-13 07:22:04 PM  

Turd_Ferguson: tinfoil-hat maggie: Turd_Ferguson: tinfoil-hat maggie: eas81: I lurv Ms. Addams..

[www.deviantart.com image 517x800][cdn2.istudio.com image 532x800]

/ROWR!!!!!

I think I could luv her too, hmmm.

Well that calls for a spanking, keep up the great work.

Well, I have been naughty, just not lately :)

It's cool, you're grandfathered in. Carry on and let me know when you're ready for those spankings. I'm patient.


Whats scary is if your profile is currant your close enough for me to make some really fun mistakes with.
 
2012-06-13 07:22:25 PM  
Oh, it is another of those threads.

A lot of "tee hee," a bunch of AW'ing, and a whole lot of eye rolling.

"Oh yeah, I used the Johnsonator 4000 on my gal this weekend,"

"That got the Reamator with the hand tooled leather boob scraper?"

"The very same."

snore.....
 
2012-06-13 07:22:27 PM  

Nidiot: Matthew Keene: My best experience was a taser to the balls once. I'm actually up for that again. It was awesome.

Well you are easily pleased. It is really not that hard to buy a taser to keep yourself amused. You should be rolling around on the carpet right now instead of posting here.


I was tied up at the time. Something about begging for mercy, screaming NO NO NO and then getting 50,000 volts in the nutsack.
 
2012-06-13 07:22:34 PM  

Dahnkster: [media.ebcu.com image 500x500]

If this image doesn't immediately make you think 'nipples'....
You are probably in the wrong thread


Not going to lie. That post + the context of this thread made me wonder if there's a measurable potential across the nipples. Which was followed closely by, "alright, the ground is an alligator clip, but how do you get the hook-tip probe to stick?" Which, in turn, was followed by, "I know how they'd answer that..." and finally by, "ow ow ow, not even thinking about it."

/I mean without an external supply
//Stop that
 
2012-06-13 07:23:32 PM  

halfof33: Oh, it is another of those threads.

A lot of "tee hee," a bunch of AW'ing, and a whole lot of eye rolling.

"Oh yeah, I used the Johnsonator 4000 on my gal this weekend,"

"That got the Reamator with the hand tooled leather boob scraper?"

"The very same."

snore.....


Oh look it's one of those posts.

snore.....
 
2012-06-13 07:24:49 PM  

Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.


wow, how boring. Watch bad movies and fool around like a couple of adolescents.
 
2012-06-13 07:27:12 PM  

halfof33: Oh, it is another of those threads.

A lot of "tee hee," a bunch of AW'ing, and a whole lot of eye rolling.

"Oh yeah, I used the Johnsonator 4000 on my gal this weekend,"

"That got the Reamator with the hand tooled leather boob scraper?"

"The very same."

snore.....


*bats eyelashes*

Do tell us how much more interesting YOUR weekend was... Im sure we are all dying to hear about your WOW raid and your Cheetos stained penis...
 
2012-06-13 07:31:08 PM  

Need Help Soonish: tinfoil-hat maggie: Need Help Soonish: Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.

OR!

We could kill zombies on the couch for a couple of hours while drinking rum, go to the bathroom, engage in oral, anal, and fisting while showering, then finish up with our girlfriend a few hours later when she shows up.

///I like my way better thank you...
///also, romantic comedies are a scourge upon our society :/

Your party does sound much more fun.

Just remember the coconut oil... and all will be well :)


Note to self, don't leave the coconut oil at home.
 
2012-06-13 07:31:27 PM  

constructor5179: Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.

wow, how boring. Watch bad movies and fool around like a couple of adolescents.


hey, it can be fun...

as long as the bad movie is on SciFi
 
2012-06-13 07:32:03 PM  
BDSM is clearly contrary to anarchist ethics.

I hold it violates feminist ethics as well; though female feminists might offer plausible arguments in favor of tying up, degrading and hurting men, I regard that as the revenge of the weak and not a positive principle. (NTTAWWT, necessarily.)

Personally I'd much rather hurt someone I don't like and have no respect for, thus anyone who'd volunteer to be abused by me is inherently contemptible. Those who think it's "just good fun" are pitiful and deluded, like "transsexuals."

So, to all those who live according to my opinion, TheDavidTM has spoken. (You're welcome.)
 
2012-06-13 07:35:52 PM  
Nur für mich bist du am Leben
Only for me are you alive
Ich steckt dir Orden ins Gesicht
I put Medals in your face (I am superior to you)
Du bist mir ganz und gar ergeben
You are entirely submissive to me
Du liebst mich denn ich lieb dich nicht
You love me because I don't love you

Du blutest für mein Seelenheil
You bleed for my salvation
Ein kleiner Schnitt und du wirst geil
A small cut and you're horny
Der Körper schon total entstellt
The body already totally disfigured
Egal, erlaubt ist was gefällt
Whatever, anything goes

Ich tu dir weh
I hurt you
Tut mir nicht leid
I'm not sorry
Das tut dir gut
This does you good
Hör wie es schreit
Hear how it screams

Bei dir habe ich die Wahl der Qual
With you have I the choice of torment
Stacheldraht im Harnkanal
Barbed wire in urethra
Leg dein Fleisch in Salz und Eiter
Put your flesh in salt and pus
Erst stirbst du doch dann lebst du weiter
First you die (come) but then you live on

Biße, Tritte, harte Schläge
Bites, kicks, hard blows
Nadeln, Zangen, stumpfe Säge
Needles, pliers, dull saw
Wünsch dir was, ich sag nicht nein
Make a wish, I won't say no
Und führ dir Nagetiere ein
And lead the rodents in

Ich tu dir weh
I hurt you
Tut mir nicht leid
I'm not sorry
Das tut dir gut
This does you good
Hör wie es schreit
Hear how it screams
Ich tu dir weh
I hurt you
Tut mir nicht leid
I'm not sorry
Das tut dir gut
This does you good
Hör wie es schreit
Hear how it screams

Du bist das Schiff, ich der Kapitän
You are the ship, I'm the captain
Wohin soll denn die Reise gehen
Where do you want to go
Ich seh im Spiegel dein Gesicht
I see your face in the mirror
Du liebst mich denn ich lieb dich nicht
You love me because I don't love you

Ich tu dir weh
I hurt you
Tut mir nicht leid
I'm not sorry
Das tut dir gut
This does you good
Hör wie es schreit
Hear how it screams


Such a romantic song, and it got banned in Germany until the courts struck the ban. Those Europeans aren't as free-thinking as we assume they are :)

/Rammstein für immer!
 
2012-06-13 07:40:00 PM  

silvervial: Such a romantic song, and it got banned in Germany


siiiick!! But you have to give it up for them. Germans are always on the cutting edge of S&M.
 
2012-06-13 07:40:13 PM  

Dahnkster: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 640x427]

Speak. Now, Beg!


Even villains need a pet.
trevmurphy.com
 
2012-06-13 07:40:25 PM  

The One True TheDavid: BDSM is clearly contrary to anarchist ethics.

I hold it violates feminist ethics as well; though female feminists might offer plausible arguments in favor of tying up, degrading and hurting men, I regard that as the revenge of the weak and not a positive principle. (NTTAWWT, necessarily.)

Personally I'd much rather hurt someone I don't like and have no respect for, thus anyone who'd volunteer to be abused by me is inherently contemptible. Those who think it's "just good fun" are pitiful and deluded, like "transsexuals."

So, to all those who live according to my opinion, TheDavidTM has spoken. (You're welcome.)


Congratulations, I think this may be the single most offensive - though somewhat politely put - post that I've ever read.
 
2012-06-13 07:40:36 PM  
 
2012-06-13 07:40:47 PM  
Sounds like my kind of gal
 
2012-06-13 07:41:34 PM  

baka-san: constructor5179: Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.

wow, how boring. Watch bad movies and fool around like a couple of adolescents.

hey, it can be fun...

as long as the bad movie is on SciFi


I stand corrected sir
 
2012-06-13 07:43:30 PM  
cdn-www.cracked.com

Real book from the past...
 
2012-06-13 07:44:15 PM  
I enjoy her cavalier attitude about having her chamber stumbled upon.
 
2012-06-13 07:44:41 PM  

Dahnkster: [media.ebcu.com image 500x500]

If this image doesn't immediately make you think 'nipples'....
You are probably in the wrong thread

I would have also accepted 'clothespin' or 'jumper cables'


I wouldn't use that on nipples, the metal edges could damage the skin when it's removed without opening it. You should always have some smooth material on the surface.
 
2012-06-13 07:45:16 PM  

Matthew Keene: Nidiot: Matthew Keene: My best experience was a taser to the balls once. I'm actually up for that again. It was awesome.

Well you are easily pleased. It is really not that hard to buy a taser to keep yourself amused. You should be rolling around on the carpet right now instead of posting here.

I was tied up at the time. Something about begging for mercy, screaming NO NO NO and then getting 50,000 volts in the nutsack.


... go on.
 
2012-06-13 07:47:53 PM  

Need Help Soonish: Matthew Keene: Nidiot: Matthew Keene: My best experience was a taser to the balls once. I'm actually up for that again. It was awesome.

Well you are easily pleased. It is really not that hard to buy a taser to keep yourself amused. You should be rolling around on the carpet right now instead of posting here.

I was tied up at the time. Something about begging for mercy, screaming NO NO NO and then getting 50,000 volts in the nutsack.

... go on.


I got zapped about ten times that night. Finally passed out. Also that morning found a large quilting safety pen through my penis. Didn't even remember that happening. Lots of blood when I removed it.
 
2012-06-13 07:51:08 PM  

LazerFish: I dated a girl that ran a sex toy shop. She was into whips and paddles and bondage... I was cool with that. But when I saw her naked (specifically without panties), i found out she liked cutting herself. Freaked me out, so i left and never talked to her again.
Also, I seem to attract women who like to bite/be bitten (even before the vampire craze). Is that common among females?


Still have her number?
 
2012-06-13 07:51:17 PM  

Exception Collection: Dahnkster: [media.ebcu.com image 500x500]

If this image doesn't immediately make you think 'nipples'....
You are probably in the wrong thread

I would have also accepted 'clothespin' or 'jumper cables'

I wouldn't use that on nipples, the metal edges could damage the skin when it's removed without opening it. You should always have some smooth material on the surface.


I'd assume the dull razor and barbed wire crowd doesn't worry all that much about a little abraded skin, even on the most sensitive of places. Heck, they're probably coming back through with salt and lemon juice and maybe a set of teeth.
 
2012-06-13 07:53:05 PM  

Matthew Keene: Need Help Soonish: Matthew Keene: Nidiot: Matthew Keene: My best experience was a taser to the balls once. I'm actually up for that again. It was awesome.

Well you are easily pleased. It is really not that hard to buy a taser to keep yourself amused. You should be rolling around on the carpet right now instead of posting here.

I was tied up at the time. Something about begging for mercy, screaming NO NO NO and then getting 50,000 volts in the nutsack.

... go on.

I got zapped about ten times that night. Finally passed out. Also that morning found a large quilting safety pen through my penis. Didn't even remember that happening. Lots of blood when I removed it.


Ohhh my...

Im not going to lie, that paints one HELL of a picture in my head :)

///A yummy, yummy picture...
 
2012-06-13 07:57:44 PM  

Dahnkster: [www.madisonsmommys.com image 285x706]

There's a call for you. You better take it inside.


Bwahahaha. +1.

This thread brings up some fond feelings. It's nice to have a lady friend with whom everything is a possibility.
 
2012-06-13 07:57:47 PM  
pen through my penis
hell i don't even have a penis

i cut it off 10 years ago for food
 
2012-06-13 07:59:04 PM  

moops: No mention of Joseph Fritzl? Fark I am disappoint.

He's huge on 4chan.


Here's something all about Fritzl.


/those things at the end exploding are babies
//Rammstein für immer!
 
2012-06-13 07:59:28 PM  

Need Help Soonish: Ohhh my...

Im not going to lie, that paints one HELL of a picture in my head :)


How YOU do........*rereads post*

Wait. I've changed my mind.
 
2012-06-13 08:01:01 PM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Turd_Ferguson: tinfoil-hat maggie: Turd_Ferguson: tinfoil-hat maggie: eas81: I lurv Ms. Addams..

[www.deviantart.com image 517x800][cdn2.istudio.com image 532x800]

/ROWR!!!!!

I think I could luv her too, hmmm.

Well that calls for a spanking, keep up the great work.

Well, I have been naughty, just not lately :)

It's cool, you're grandfathered in. Carry on and let me know when you're ready for those spankings. I'm patient.

Whats scary is if your profile is currant your close enough for me to make some really fun mistakes with.


Oh it's current, just like my email address.
 
2012-06-13 08:01:05 PM  

Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.


Holy cat. I hope that was sarcasm. I hate those movies. With the lights out? Really? Spankings are good. Being told what to do rocks! Having to say "yes, sir" is awesome! I love being ordered to give a bj. Good times. . .good times.
 
2012-06-13 08:01:38 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: Need Help Soonish: Ohhh my...

Im not going to lie, that paints one HELL of a picture in my head :)

How YOU do........*rereads post*

Wait. I've changed my mind.


HA! Too late, I already saw ya :P

/// I only hurt the ones that like it...
/// Ok, and the ones that deserve it too.
 
2012-06-13 08:04:00 PM  

halfof33: Oh, it is another of those threads.

A lot of "tee hee," a bunch of AW'ing, and a whole lot of eye rolling.

"Oh yeah, I used the Johnsonator 4000 on my gal this weekend,"

"That got the Reamator with the hand tooled leather boob scraper?"

"The very same."

snore.....


The Reamator suggestion turned me on.


/Being serious
 
2012-06-13 08:05:13 PM  
 
2012-06-13 08:06:54 PM  

irishdncr83: Am I the only person in the entire universe that thinks the D in BDSM means "domination" and not "discipline" per the article?


I was going to say the same thing, so, no.
 
2012-06-13 08:07:02 PM  

algrant33: I'd assume the dull razor and barbed wire crowd doesn't worry all that much about a little abraded skin, even on the most sensitive of places. Heck, they're probably coming back through with salt and lemon juice and maybe a set of teeth.


I'm one of the dull razor and barbed wire crowd. The problem with uncovered alligator clips is that they can be tight enough that they can actually remove the nipple if enough tension is applied.

Besides, if you put a smooth covering on them you can whip them off instead. So much more fun.
 
2012-06-13 08:07:07 PM  

irishdncr83: Am I the only person in the entire universe that thinks the D in BDSM means "domination" and not "discipline" per the article?


You are correct
 
2012-06-13 08:07:22 PM  

SurfaceTension: LazerFish: I dated a girl that ran a sex toy shop. She was into whips and paddles and bondage... I was cool with that. But when I saw her naked (specifically without panties), i found out she liked cutting herself. Freaked me out, so i left and never talked to her again.
Also, I seem to attract women who like to bite/be bitten (even before the vampire craze). Is that common among females?

Still have her number?


I believe it's: 666
My friends called her spider biatch, i still dont know why ha ha
 
2012-06-13 08:07:29 PM  

Shakespeare's Sister: Mark Ratner: Jeez, some of you people are not right in the head, you sinners.

How about two people on a couch watching a romantic comedy, like "When Harry Met Sally" or "The Notebook," and flirting a bit while sharing a bottle of wine? After the movie ends, you talk and flirt some more, and then kiss passionately while engaging in some heavy petting. Move to the bedroom, turn off the lights, and make love like normal people.

Holy cat. I hope that was sarcasm. I hate those movies. With the lights out? Really? Spankings are good. Being told what to do rocks! Having to say "yes, sir" is awesome! I love being ordered to give a bj. Good times. . .good times.


:-p

What do I get on a scale of 1 to 10?
 
2012-06-13 08:09:26 PM  

irishdncr83: Am I the only person in the entire universe that thinks the D in BDSM means "domination" and not "discipline" per the article?


BDSM is expanded as such:

Bondage/Discipline-Domination/Submission-Sadism/Masochism
 
2012-06-13 08:10:17 PM  

Tsu-na-mi: irishdncr83: Am I the only person in the entire universe that thinks the D in BDSM means "domination" and not "discipline" per the article?

I was going to say the same thing, so, no.


It's actually 6 words (well, 5) in a 4 letter acronym.

Bondage & discipline (or Bondage & domination)
Domination & submission
Sadism & Masochism

You can have a B/D relationship, a D/s relationship, or a S&M relationship, or a combination of any of the above.
 
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