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(CBS New York)   Moran: "Yes, I'd like to report a road rage incident that happened yesterday." Police: "Oh, so you're the guy who impersonated an ICE agent, handcuffed a teen, and brought him to your house. We need to talk"   (newyork.cbslocal.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, ice, special agents, false imprisonments, ICE agents, Port Jefferson Station  
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17588 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jun 2012 at 2:37 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-13 05:37:33 PM  

cleveoh: said attorney Anthony Lapinta. "What I will say about his true identity is that he is a very hardworking man, he's an accomplished business man."

Way to blow our hero's secret identity, Mr. Super Genius Lawyer Guy! Now the League of Evil Super Villians is going to be plotting all kinds of nefarious things.


It's Immigration Dude!
 
2012-06-13 05:38:59 PM  
his car trunk inventory:

www.masa.asn.au

foohbar.com

worldwillend2012.com

www.britelite-hydroponics-uk.com

discountcarpetsthatcham.yellsites.co.uk

ecx.images-amazon.com

4.bp.blogspot.com

www.erowid.org

/you know, for camping!
 
2012-06-13 05:49:18 PM  
Pic caption FTFA...

"Whada you'se lookin' at 'dere, Jerky."
 
2012-06-13 06:01:08 PM  

JackieRabbit: Evil Mackerel: JackieRabbit: We should introduce this guy to George Zimmerman so they can compare cop-wannabe notes. They both haves some time on their hands just now.

With all the malls in the U.S. you'd think one would have an opening for a rent a cop.

I had a friend in HS who turned into one of these freaks. He joined the Marines after HS, but got kicked out, when he went off on a major because he had been in the Corps for six months and hadn't had an opportunity to kill anyone. Then he went to the police academy and became a cop. He didn't last long at that either because he pistol-whipped a driver he had pulled over. So he figured his best chance of being able to abuse and kill someone was to become a prison guard. That ended when he assaulted a prisoner and put him in the hospital. Note that he assaulted two people in the role of a law enforcement officer, but was never arrested. The last I heard of him, he was in prison for aggravated assault with intent because he attacked a neighbor who was playing his stereo too loudly and violating the city's noise ordinance. People don't seem to understand what sick minds people like this have. They are dangerous.


Kid I hired was like this. Worked out all the time. Had a classic buzz cut haircut. Marine t shirts all the time. Talked about it non-stop. Turns out he was never in the corps. I guess he never had anything going for himself, so he made something up.
 
2012-06-13 06:17:12 PM  

Maud Dib: What is it with nutjobs who like to impersonate law enforcement officers?

*ahem*

[upload.democraticunderground.com image 401x342]


Oh yeah?!?!?! Well....

i45.tinypic.com
 
2012-06-13 06:23:07 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Maud Dib: What is it with nutjobs who like to impersonate law enforcement officers?

*ahem*

[upload.democraticunderground.com image 401x342]

Oh yeah?!?!?! Well....

[i45.tinypic.com image 640x482]


The above is an entirely fictional spoof and a fabrication of my, shall we say, active imagination. Please do not send the black helicopters and/or vans after me.
 
2012-06-13 06:23:36 PM  

farkingatwork: CheekyMonkey: Let him go after five minutes?

See, dude, that's why you'll never be anything more than a wanna-be. A real LEO would have beaten a confession out of that punk-ass kid.

question missing:

what the hell happened during those 5 minutes? I'm guessing sodomy.


Well, the guy's defense is that the kid "went to the house willingly." But Bradley's attorney said Wednesday that the teen went willingly to the house and that the accusations aren't true.

So the only OTHER explanation is that this married father of two insurance salesman--had a male hooker over for a date and his wife came home early. Or he's the local pedophile and entices confused young men into his home to watch manly porn, and then shows them manly porn while demonstrating the maneuvers on them. And then his wife came home early.
 
2012-06-13 06:37:09 PM  
But Bradley's attorney said Wednesday that the teen went willingly to the house and that the accusations aren't true.

"Our position is that this never happened, he was never involved in any impersonation whatsoever," said attorney Anthony Lapinta. "What I will say about his true identity is that he is a very hardworking man, he's an accomplished business man."


Wow, how can you even look yourself in the eye in the morning? Your defense is that the teen WANTED to be pulled over, handcuffed, and kidnapped to some guys house, leaving his car on the highway, and wondering if he was going to jail, or going to be put in some freaks pit in his basement? Is that your defense? Sighs..i think that defense lawyers like this should get the same time in jail that their client gets when they come up with a moranic defense like this. But who knows? People are farking stupid. They might just let him go with a jury trial.
 
2012-06-13 06:37:57 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: The above is an entirely fictional spoof and a fabrication of my, shall we say, active imagination. Please do not send the black helicopters and/or vans after me.


The fact you could even imagine that scenario makes me a little nervous you are roaming about free amongst us.
 
2012-06-13 07:10:39 PM  
Gene? There's no way you're that good.
 
2012-06-13 07:29:17 PM  
Reminds me of the time we used to go to the food court in the mall and yell Immigra!!!

Looked like this....

enduringsense.com
 
2012-06-13 07:43:27 PM  

sid2112: Reminds me of the time we used to go to the food court in the mall and yell Immigra!!!

Looked like this....

[enduringsense.com image 640x454]


The food court looked like coastal chaparral?

here to help: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: The above is an entirely fictional spoof and a fabrication of my, shall we say, active imagination. Please do not send the black helicopters and/or vans after me.

The fact you could even imagine that scenario makes me a little nervous you are roaming about free amongst us.


I don't so much roam as skulk.
 
2012-06-13 07:51:03 PM  
Morans don't know about the core?!

/welcometofark.jpg
 
2012-06-13 08:05:46 PM  
i like called all the head shops nearby and NONE of them have bath salts whats the dael yo
 
2012-06-13 08:16:38 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: sid2112: Reminds me of the time we used to go to the food court in the mall and yell Immigra!!!

Looked like this....

[enduringsense.com image 640x454]

The food court looked like coastal chaparral?

here to help: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: The above is an entirely fictional spoof and a fabrication of my, shall we say, active imagination. Please do not send the black helicopters and/or vans after me.

The fact you could even imagine that scenario makes me a little nervous you are roaming about free amongst us.

I don't so much roam as skulk.


As long as you don't lurk. Then you'd be a molester and we can't have that.
 
2012-06-13 08:19:03 PM  

offmymeds: highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core corps.

[usassociatesllc.com image 294x288]

/pet peeve


Your sarcastometer needs a new battery.
 
2012-06-13 10:13:34 PM  

ladyfortuna: slimfast


My wife's cousin is a Moran...
 
2012-06-13 10:22:15 PM  

highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core.


Marine Corpse.

/FTFY
 
2012-06-13 10:48:09 PM  

offmymeds: highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core corps.

[usassociatesllc.com image 294x288]

/pet peeve


Got a few bites I see, remember to stick to the limit and no undersize.

/Not a real gamewarden
 
2012-06-14 01:22:53 AM  

offmymeds: highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core corpscorpse.

[usassociatesllc.com image 294x288]

/pet peeve


FTFY
 
2012-06-14 01:34:16 AM  

Warchild: JesusJuice: Not surprised to see small-town cops eating each others shiat.

Suffolk County PD is "small town cops"? Seriously?


Guess not.
 
2012-06-14 08:27:38 AM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: Oh yeah?!?!?! Well....

[i45.tinypic.com image 640x482]

The above is an entirely fictional spoof and a fabrication of my, shall we say, active imagination.



Damn. I was going to totally post that to my silly libdem friends as an example of why President Obama is unfit to lead our country.
 
2012-06-14 08:28:25 AM  
My friend's brother had dreams of being a cop. Had a Crown Vic (the old boxy type the cops used before the rounder ones came out) with blue and yellow lights inside, a radar gun, and an airhorn. I think he took the whole citizen's arrest thing too seriously, as he pulled someone over for speeding. I'm sure the driver was freaked, because the guy's deaf and can't utter a single intelligible word. Luckily, the cops we had were decent guys and only ticketed him (he was still pretty young at the time). That was the end of that.
 
2012-06-14 10:31:47 AM  

Bit'O'Gristle: But Bradley's attorney said Wednesday that the teen went willingly to the house and that the accusations aren't true.

"Our position is that this never happened, he was never involved in any impersonation whatsoever," said attorney Anthony Lapinta. "What I will say about his true identity is that he is a very hardworking man, he's an accomplished business man."

Wow, how can you even look yourself in the eye in the morning? Your defense is that the teen WANTED to be pulled over, handcuffed, and kidnapped to some guys house, leaving his car on the highway, and wondering if he was going to jail, or going to be put in some freaks pit in his basement? Is that your defense? Sighs..i think that defense lawyers like this should get the same time in jail that their client gets when they come up with a moranic defense like this. But who knows? People are farking stupid. They might just let him go with a jury trial.


Don't take this wrong way, but you are an idiot.
 
2012-06-14 11:57:21 AM  

offmymeds: highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core corps.

[usassociatesllc.com image 294x288]

/pet peeve


I hate to do this because they have already been through the wringer, but they are all found in "Fark's 12 most epic threads" thread. Threads also have links to other threads, but I don't want to post a bunch of links.

/thread... word's lost all meaning now

Here're where a lot of it comes from - With FLYNAVY rehash, too:
Link

Link

Link
 
2012-06-14 12:31:48 PM  

highendmighty: offmymeds: highendmighty: He's also retired from the marine core corps.

[usassociatesllc.com image 294x288]

/pet peeve

I hate to do this because they have already been through the wringer, but they are all found in "Fark's 12 most epic threads" thread. Threads also have links to other threads, but I don't want to post a bunch of links.

/thread... word's lost all meaning now

Here're where a lot of it comes from - With FLYNAVY rehash, too:
Link

Link

Link


Long before my time. Didn't start posting until 08/24/2010. Not exactly a newbie, but still not in on a lot of farkisms. As for the a-hole who called me a grammer nazi and a douchebag, I'd just like to say that I'd like to tell you to go f*ck yourself, but from what I've heard you wouldn't be very good at it.
 
2012-06-14 12:55:28 PM  

offmymeds: Long before my time. Didn't start posting until 08/24/2010


I understand the frustration. Only this guy can tell inside jokes to perfect strangers.
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-06-14 01:01:07 PM  
BTK was also as upstanding in his daily life as anybody could be.

Also, Welcum to Fark, Marons GO USA
 
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