ChipNASA: So far....Farkers that read the headline as Babby Pron ( "Farked Triplets" ) = 4

/do I hear 5,
//My bet is that it goes to 10 at least.....for those that will admit it and comment.

That's what I read, until maybe the third time!
How about an article about Farking three hot nymphos instead?

LineNoise:

Is it just me, or is 21k in food assistance a hell of a lot for 3 kids.

Well, that probably included his share too.

But yeah, $5250 per household member in less than a year does seem like a lot. Kentucky gives me less than half that in 12 full months.

I'd rather get get more cash and less SNAP but that's the way they do things here. So in order to afford new cowboy boots (instead of beaten-up Wal-Mart sneakers) I'm going to have to move to a cheaper apartment, because I'm simply not stupid enough to defraud the taxpayers of Kentucky like that.

All the "Department for Community Based Services" asks is that I follow a few very simple rules and they'll feed me for the rest of my life. I'd have kill somebody to get a better deal than that, and that wouldn't be half as much fun.

Buffet: ChipNASA: So far....Farkers that read the headline as Babby Pron ( "Farked Triplets" ) = 6

/do I hear 5,
//My bet is that it goes to 10 at least.....for those that will admit it and comment.

That's what I read, until maybe the third time!
How about an article about Farking three hot nymphos instead?

I was pleased to find out that Pennsylvania food stamps do not allow you to buy Fiji water.

The woman in front of me wasn't pleased at all...

What fabricating triplets might look like:

Horsefeathers.
It takes nine months to make a baby, Nine monthe per baby should be the sentence, and a kick in the stomache, and a removal of reproductive rights, and a slap up side the head.
She was taking food out of the mouths of hungry children.

Hard time
Brown time with Caged heat broomstick lesbians, baby.

Make an example of her.
And when she gets out, she can pick crops, apples, and cotton, and berrys, and what not, and work it off.

LineNoise:

I watched a guy the other day buy like 20 packs of gum on his NJ equivalent card the other day. Obviously he was going to resell it,

GUM? If you're correct about reselling it, was he collecting bus fare on a playground or something? GUM?!?


but what dumbfounded me about the whole thing was:

1. The card actually let him buy gum. I'm all for helping hungry people eat, but I think they can go without some stride if its on my dime.

Actually I see your point. He should have bought T-bone instead.


2. The guy was buying the individual packs at the register, when he could have just went to the candy aisle and bought the same stuff in a 20 pack for like 1/3rd of the price.

Again, point taken.

Personally I think we should euthanize the stupid. Voluntarily: tell them they're going to be "renewed" or put into a deep freeze till Science finds a cure for their condition.

9 Lives Beef is people!

Santa's Knee: [content.clearchannel.com image 210x210]
"Is dat be wrong? Shoulds I'z not be doing dat?"

Hey SK, you'z be racist. Cut that shiate out.

What's the problem? She is just participating in the economy. That helps everyone. Otherwise that money would just be in some greedy 1%ers bank account. We should not call this "fraud" we should give her a presidential medal for going above and beyond in her effort to help the economy get back on track.

I bet they'll be adding charges for harboring a fugitive pretty soon.

Santa's Knee: jack_sawyer75: Is saying I knew she was black racist?

Yes, you is saying it.

White people can commit stupid crimes too. Santa's Knees mom clearly did.
Clearly a crime against nature, at least.

so what box should i mark to raise my taxes to feed the hungry??

/also love seeing the pass that so many farkers give this woman. why is that??
// WE GET IT, SHE'S BLACK

30 days? Wow. 21k is grand theft. I'm wondering why she didn't get the 10 year mandatory minimum.

MilesTeg: What's the problem? She is just participating in the economy. That helps everyone. Otherwise that money would just be in some greedy 1%ers bank account. We should not call this "fraud" we should give her a presidential medal for going above and beyond in her effort to help the economy get back on track.

Some people will actually believe this.

Pocket Ninja: See, the problem here is that she didn't think big enough. Instead of faking triplets for her boyfriend, she should have faked triplets for everyone. Just given everyone in the State a set of triplets that they could claim for tax purposes or food stamps or whatever else they needed. Having triplets would become the new normal; people everywhere would marvel at Illinois' sudden population boom. Congressional seats would be added; additional Federal revenue streams would be secured; new housing, construction, and infrastructure projects would erupt all across the state. When having triplets was no longer sufficient to sustain the newly enriched lifestyles to which citizens had become accustomed, a fourth child could be added. A fifth. Other states would begin to take notice. More and more Americans across the country would begin to enjoy the benefits of having hypothetical litters of children. Nations would look enviously at our projected growth rate and begin to emulate the practice. Entire industries -- childcare, tutoring, nursing, toymaking -- would grow up around servicing a vast new generation. Thousands upon thousands of jobs would be created.

And when it all finally burst, when some idiot at a party took out his fake photo of his fake kid to show to his buddy and then realized that his buddy's fake photo was the same one copied from the same website, that they were looking at the same fake kid; when everybody realized at once that there actually were no children, that it was all just a lie they thought they'd been pulling off on their own but had really been sharing in together, well, what would happen? It would all be too big at that point, too big to fail. There would be too much at stake. The Federal government would step in, set some new, stringent mandates regarding the generation of hypothetical children. It would prop the new companies that had been created to save some jobs and hope that actual births someday began to catch up to hypothetical ones. I ...

Hat tipped to you sir .. well & done in one. :)

WarszawaScream: Clemkadidlefark: But she'll still have her AFSCME state job when she gets through serving her sentence.

Once you're in the Union, the Union is always in you.

Not she won't. The crime was directly related to and committed at her job. They put her on "administrative leave" because they couldn't fire her until she was convicted of such, the union can only protect her that far. Now that she has been convicted? She can kiss that job goodbye.

And quite frankly I'm appauled at the fact that she only got 30 days... in NY, "falsifying state documents" is a huge, huge offence. (Had a boss once tell me it was a felony, but I got nothing to back that up.) The fact that she was only charged with "theft of government services" really is shocking to me.

/state employee, obviously

I hear you, but I bet I'm right

Dixie_Wrecked: You don't even need to click the link. You know already.


I feel the same about the comments. And yet...

LineNoise: 1. The card actually let him buy gum. I'm all for helping hungry people eat, but I think they can go without some stride if its on my dime.

The card isn't smart enough to know the UPC code or the store SKU for the product, just the location of the purchase.

ThrobblefootSpectre: I'm wondering why she didn't get the 10 year mandatory minimum.

Cause she got triplets to take care of.

"State Worker" somehow relevant? considering how we've been demonizing "state workers" across the board in this country? Bunch of AM radio, sheepy mf'ers.

Fark U: "State Worker" somehow relevant?

She's a caseworker, meaning she is supposed to be looking out for this very kind of scam. Yeah, I'd say it's relevant.

The One True TheDavid: Illinois still uses paper stamps? Kentucky gives me a debit card kind of thing.

So food "stamp" receipients can't afford food but can afford internet access and have time to post on Fark? No wonder we have to use inmates to pick onions.

30 days for a serious felony?

hasty ambush: The One True TheDavid: Illinois still uses paper stamps? Kentucky gives me a debit card kind of thing.

So food "stamp" receipients can't afford food but can afford internet access and have time to post on Fark? No wonder we have to use inmates to pick onions.

Because there's no condition that leaves people alive and communicative but useless for most forms of labor?

The One True TheDavid: LineNoise:

Is it just me, or is 21k in food assistance a hell of a lot for 3 kids.

Well, that probably included his share too.

But yeah, $5250 per household member in less than a year does seem like a lot. Kentucky gives me less than half that in 12 full months.

I'd rather get get more cash and less SNAP but that's the way they do things here. So in order to afford new cowboy boots (instead of beaten-up Wal-Mart sneakers) I'm going to have to move to a cheaper apartment, because I'm simply not stupid enough to defraud the taxpayers of Kentucky like that.

All the "Department for Community Based Services" asks is that I follow a few very simple rules and they'll feed me for the rest of my life. I'd have kill somebody to get a better deal than that, and that wouldn't be half as much fun.



/sorry, man. I kid you...

hasty ambush: The One True TheDavid: Illinois still uses paper stamps? Kentucky gives me a debit card kind of thing.

So food "stamp" receipients can't afford food but can afford internet access and have time to post on Fark? No wonder we have to use inmates to pick onions.

Fark U: "State Worker" somehow relevant? considering how we've been demonizing "state workers" across the board in this country? Bunch of AM radio, sheepy mf'ers.

Your correct, the proper term would be state employee because to be called a worker one must actual perform work. Peforming work is not something your average civil servant is familiar with.

SevenizGud: And now she's out of a job, and will get more from welfare than working.

Reward the fail...this is what happens.

She may well qualify, but your grasp of the economics is fuzzy.

groppet: SevenizGud: And now she's out of a job, and will get more from welfare than working.

Reward the fail...this is what happens.

You would think they would not let her have any benefits since she commited fraud.

It would be a fascinating legal fight. I have never seen anyone other than the applicant disqualified for fraud, but I could totally see it working in this case. The general standard is that you have to prove intent and that the person in question benefited from the deception. I had a not-for-profit group home employee commit fraud on the applications for her residents once. We couldn't disqualify the residents because they didn't intentionally defraud the system--they didn't have the capacity to! So I wanted to go after the employee for the sanction; unfortunately, it was a hard sell because we couldn't prove that she was the beneficiary of the fraud. Weird situation.

/She totally was, but PROVING it is a little difficult when all of your logical witnesses are mentally incompetent.

WarszawaScream: Clemkadidlefark: But she'll still have her AFSCME state job when she gets through serving her sentence.

Once you're in the Union, the Union is always in you.

Not she won't. The crime was directly related to and committed at her job. They put her on "administrative leave" because they couldn't fire her until she was convicted of such, the union can only protect her that far. Now that she has been convicted? She can kiss that job goodbye.

And quite frankly I'm appauled at the fact that she only got 30 days... in NY, "falsifying state documents" is a huge, huge offence. (Had a boss once tell me it was a felony, but I got nothing to back that up.) The fact that she was only charged with "theft of government services" really is shocking to me.

/state employee, obviously

She'll be unemployed and ineligible for unemployment, yeah. She might get something out of her pension someday, way down the line, but even then only if she had been working there long enough to be vested in their system...

ThrobblefootSpectre: 30 days? Wow. 21k is grand theft. I'm wondering why she didn't get the 10 year mandatory minimum.

Corrupt Illinois State government is corrupt. And incapable of setting meaningful punishments.

Dr Jack Badofsky: ThrobblefootSpectre: 30 days? Wow. 21k is grand theft. I'm wondering why she didn't get the 10 year mandatory minimum.

Corrupt Illinois State government is corrupt. And incapable of setting meaningful punishments.

White collar crime with, apparently, no priors? I'm shocked she got any time at all. Probation and restitution is generally the sentence for this kind of thing, like it or not. (Professional bias: I personally don't.) The moral uprightness of Illinois state government has nothing to do with it.

10 days? How about 9 1/2 months per baby?

hide her food stamps under her work boots... or something like that

"In less than a year, Jones collected $21,866 in food benefits, the Daily Herald reported."

But...but...but...there's no safety net for poor people. Obama told me so.

Harry Freakstorm: The One True TheDavid
Illinois still uses paper stamps? Kentucky gives me a debit card kind of thing.

Illinois has the LINK card. It gets refilled every month. If you are looking for a deal, go down to the Walmart parking lot. Someone there will offer you a LINK card and a pin for about half of what is supposedly on the card.

Stood behind a lady at the Circle K and watched her go through about four of the cards looking for one "That had stuff on it" (Her words). The clerk didn't say a word.

Or the East Portland method: Johnny is baked and munchiefied and has $10 cash on him. Rainbow wants a $5 pack of smokes, which you can't buy with a food card. So they go to the store together, Johnny buys the smokes with his cash, and Rainbow buys Johnny $10 of whatever food he wants. Everyone comes out ahead: Johnny gets $10 of food for the. $5 he spent on smokes, Rainbow gets a pack of smokes without spending any cash, and everyone is happy, especially Johnny, who comes out ahead by not being a slave to tobacco. This assumes Rainbow doesn't have a bunch of filthy mopheaded kids living in the house going hungry, though.

highwayrun: So they go to the store together, Johnny buys the smokes with his cash, and Rainbow buys Johnny $10 of whatever food he wants. Everyone comes out ahead

Except the working class taxpayers.

ThrobblefootSpectre: highwayrun: So they go to the store together, Johnny buys the smokes with his cash, and Rainbow buys Johnny $10 of whatever food he wants. Everyone comes out ahead

Except the working class taxpayers.

I meant everyone in Johnny and Rainbow's house, but in fact, for every $1 the US government spends on food stamps, $1.70 is pumped into the economy. We as a society actually come out ahead with nutrition programs. Suck on that, Scrooge.

Uhg, the people in front of me in the grocery store had a shopping cart full of soda. Not a single bite of food! Seriously, don't they have limits on what they buy with food stamp money?

So we are now setting the standard that a human life is worth only 10 days in jail.

dognose4: Uhg, the people in front of me in the grocery store had a shopping cart full of soda. Not a single bite of food! Seriously, don't they have limits on what they buy with food stamp money?

No. The reason they don't? The program is administered through the Dept. Of Agriculture, not Human Services. It's about feeding the poor, sure, but it is also about the food industry moving more product off store shelves, and there's plenty of profit to be made selling soda, especially if it's on society's dime.

Criminal record, lost her job, pay back what was taken, and ineligible for public assistance for 5-life. Not quite as subtle a slap on the wrist as the article suggests.

/still deserves more

ChipNASA: Mr. Potatoass: LineNoise: Is it just me, or is 21k in food assistance a hell of a lot for 3 kids.

Have you seen the price of Skittles lately?

[i.qkme.me image 467x567]



I might get a 24 hour break for this, but!! For the skittles

WarszawaScream: Clemkadidlefark: But she'll still have her AFSCME state job when she gets through serving her sentence.

Once you're in the Union, the Union is always in you.

Not she won't. The crime was directly related to and committed at her job. They put her on "administrative leave" because they couldn't fire her until she was convicted of such, the union can only protect her that far. Now that she has been convicted? She can kiss that job goodbye.

And quite frankly I'm appauled at the fact that she only got 30 days... in NY, "falsifying state documents" is a huge, huge offence. (Had a boss once tell me it was a felony, but I got nothing to back that up.) The fact that she was only charged with "theft of government services" really is shocking to me.

/state employee, obviously

Most of the time lying on a government form in order to recieve public assistance is a petty-gross misdemeanor; however, some fraud can escalade into a felony. For example if you forge a doctors signature that says you can't work in order to not have to look for work or job search while recieving cash welfare it is a felony. The former type of fraud is caught very often and usually just ends up in getting the adult to sign a non-criminal admitance to the offense in which makes them ineligible for future public assistance (though the parent can still recieve food support and such for any children). The reason why they don't often press criminal charges is because the $$$ that was taken is far less than the cost of prosecution.

It is just sad because this lady's job was obviously a financial worker for the state/county and the primary role of her job is to determine income eligibility AND stop this kind of fraud. She should have known that she would be caught.

If I could show slave traders/plantation owners news articles from today I would bet they would have their kids out there tilling the fields instead.

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: What fabricating triplets might look like:

[i48.tinypic.com image 640x480]

I think I just farking died laughing at this. Thank you!

No Fark libbers on here to defend this POS they created?

CLOSE FOR THE BIT. they *HAVE* to pet.

Citrate1007: WarszawaScream: Clemkadidlefark: But she'll still have her AFSCME state job when she gets through serving her sentence.

Once you're in the Union, the Union is always in you.

Not she won't. The crime was directly related to and committed at her job. They put her on "administrative leave" because they couldn't fire her until she was convicted of such, the union can only protect her that far. Now that she has been convicted? She can kiss that job goodbye.

And quite frankly I'm appauled at the fact that she only got 30 days... in NY, "falsifying state documents" is a huge, huge offence. (Had a boss once tell me it was a felony, but I got nothing to back that up.) The fact that she was only charged with "theft of government services" really is shocking to me.

/state employee, obviously

Most of the time lying on a government form in order to recieve public assistance is a petty-gross misdemeanor; however, some fraud can escalade into a felony. For example if you forge a doctors signature that says you can't work in order to not have to look for work or job search while recieving cash welfare it is a felony. The former type of fraud is caught very often and usually just ends up in getting the adult to sign a non-criminal admitance to the offense in which makes them ineligible for future public assistance (though the parent can still recieve food support and such for any children). The reason why they don't often press criminal charges is because the $$$ that was taken is far less than the cost of prosecution.

It is just sad because this lady's job was obviously a financial worker for the state/county and the primary role of her job is to determine income eligibility AND stop this kind of fraud. She should have known that she would be caught.

Yup, correct on most counts. I will add that, in NY at least, whether it's a felony or a misdemeanor and what class of either the offense is considered is determined by the amount you're caught stealing. The "welfare fraud" series of crimes is very broad and not limited strictly to lying on an application. It's why presenting a false instrument for filing isn't a lesser included; it's a separate charge.

/The more you know, I guess.