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(Yahoo)   Sandusky's laughably inept lawyer fails to prevent him from getting wrestled into soapy submission on the first day of his trial   ( ) divider line
    More: Sick, Jerry Sandusky, Joe Amendola, bellefonte, screenplays, sex crimes, attorney-in-fact, Penn State  
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18546 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jun 2012 at 11:07 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-06-12 11:24:40 AM  
6 votes:
You know, I just don't think I'm sneaky enough to get my penis in someone's mouth. Certainly not defending Sandusky, but I'm pretty damn sure I couldn't pull off an "oops, there's my dick in your mouth".

But then again, I don't try to put my penis in the mouth of young boys with abandonment issues.

/Mental note: hit the strip club on Father's Day.
2012-06-12 11:40:34 AM  
3 votes:
Why would a Wookiee, an 8-foot-tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of 2-foot-tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.
2012-06-12 11:16:29 AM  
3 votes:
So Sandusky's going with the insanity defense? As in, "Your honor, I'm just CRAZY about young boys!!!"
2012-06-12 10:10:30 AM  
3 votes:
2012-06-12 09:28:15 AM  
2 votes:
"nailers"? Wtf? "enablers". frkking autocorrect.
2012-06-12 02:45:52 PM  
1 vote:
2012-06-12 01:59:47 PM  
1 vote:

Matthew Keene: JackieRabbit: abhorrent1: I have the weirdest boner.

Want to wrestle and then get a nice hot shower?

Sorry about my penis getting in your mouth. Don'y know how that happened.

dont talk while the kid is working
2012-06-12 01:58:57 PM  
1 vote:

JackieRabbit: abhorrent1: I have the weirdest boner.

Want to wrestle and then get a nice hot shower?

Sorry about my penis getting in your mouth. Don'y know how that happened.
2012-06-12 12:26:11 PM  
1 vote:

factoryconnection: I see profiles of people that I could know in all of those... and all the people I know want Sandusky burned to the freaking ground. A "Penn State" connection is a scorned lover at best for Jerry. He was a great DC but nobody misses him at all. I'm really surprised they were able to find Centre County residents that didn't want to choke Amendola out during jury selection.

Now, in the Shultz and Curley trials, it gets a lot muddier, but then it is a lot less clear what they did and more importantly didn't do.

I wouldn't be so sure. I was at a B1G function when an Associate Dean from PSU spoke. Despite the fact the PSU presentation had nothing to do with football or kiddie rape, he made some jokes about the Sandusky thing. Like "Haha, Jer raped some kids, but it is no big deal, haha.". He ended up refusing to take questions from myself and the other Michigan alums after we ripped into him for those comments. It was great because after saying no more questions from us, he takes a question from a Northwestern alum who point blank asks him:

"How does it feel to know your institution covered up the rape of multiple children and how much of a scumbag do you have to be to joke about it here?".

/he left the stage at that point
//some people can rationalize anything to save their precious alma mater
2012-06-12 12:05:25 PM  
1 vote:

Lawnchair: TheSelphie: [ image 630x463]

Why was this asshat allowed anywhere near his funeral? I mean, I would figure Paterno's family or something would forbid him from being there. Not a JoePa fan at all, but I definitely agree this whole thing contributed to his death.

You might look at the URL of the hotlinked image.

One way ticket, aisle please.

Goddammit so much.
2012-06-12 11:59:09 AM  
1 vote:
But football will still be played on time, right? Then it's all okay.
2012-06-12 11:56:34 AM  
1 vote:

dougermouse: So what happens if he is some how found innocent? Does one of the victims kill him on the steps of the courthouse? Riots in the streets a la OJ? Let us theorize and check back later for accuracy.

I'll play. If he's found innocent, Sandusky will retire. There will be no riots, and he will not be killed or assaulted.
2012-06-12 11:54:20 AM  
1 vote:
You know, I was already disgusted by this story since the day it came out. Reading that article actually got me kind of angry.

It's too bad that Sandusky is so old he won't live long enough to endure the torture he deserves. I hope when he dies, he ends up in hell, and Satan turns him inside out and uses him as a condom.
2012-06-12 11:37:44 AM  
1 vote:
2012-06-12 11:36:30 AM  
1 vote:
What we may have, ladies and gentlemen, is a lawyer who actually has a soul, and is going to have his client found guilty so fast that they won't have time to have the gallows set up on Mt. Nittany.
2012-06-12 11:34:32 AM  
1 vote:

topcon: [ image 512x342]

[ image 280x400]

[ image 240x320]

2012-06-12 11:33:45 AM  
1 vote:
The best he can hope for is to be burried in secret so his corpse won't be violated.

Unless he has an angle.
2012-06-12 11:29:44 AM  
1 vote:

I watched an episode of Matlock in a bar last night. The sound was off, but I think I got the gist of it.
2012-06-12 11:26:33 AM  
1 vote:

bulldg4life: He has got to be the stupidest goddamn lawyer ever.

That was pretty clearly established when he let his client go on national television and stammer through a 20 second explanation when he was asked directly if he's attracted to young boys.
2012-06-12 11:17:42 AM  
1 vote:
College football and the fanaticism it creates is CREEPY. Heres hoping jerry drops dead.
2012-06-12 11:16:58 AM  
1 vote:
He has got to be the stupidest goddamn lawyer ever.

That being said, I find it frightening that, it seems, each of these victims is going to recount dozens upon dozens of events that happened in and around PSU facilities. Does Sandusky have an invisibility cloak?
2012-06-12 11:15:34 AM  
1 vote:

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Shocked this didn't make the article...from the testimony:
"sometimes (Sandusky) would 'sneakily' put his penis in my mouth while we were showering and wrestling"

I was going to make a "Liam Neeson never taught the ninjas that/Christian Bale demanded that scene be deleted" kind of joke, but, after looking at that again I kinda don't want to anymore.

What. The. Fark.
2012-06-12 11:11:54 AM  
1 vote:

JerseyTim: Why aren't we talking about the real issue in this case?

Victim testifies Sandusky is gay but papers continue to say he's a pedophile. The coverup never ends.- Catholic League (@CatholicLeague) June 12, 2012

Whoever is the tart behind that account better be careful with where such logic may lead.

/P.S. At the minimum, it ends with Catholicism being absolutely fabulous.
2012-06-12 10:49:32 AM  
1 vote:

Krymson Tyde: I find it hard to believe he would intentionally commit career suicide by repeatedly displaying ineptness, but who knows?

He got a 16 year old client pregnant (later married her). If he's willing to risk career suicide by getting a 16 year old client pregnant, what makes you think he wouldn't risk career suicide in this case?
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