Subby has no context of context.

all you haters (probably atheist) don't have any appreciation for how the hero dad prevented the south from rising again by at least a few months.

So am I getting too tinfoil hatty by assuming the glut of sappy military stories is a concerted PR move on the military's part?

my 8 months in biloxi, at the same base, for the not-as-monkeyish job was like a vacation once i found the casinos

Approves

Arcanaloth: Getting tired of these stupid military dad stories, boooring

You'd probably be less bored if you stopped clicking on military dad stories then. Just a thought.

Aquadyne: **makes jerk off motion with his hand**

This. Oh look, another military attention whore. Hope you didn't get PSTD from the training, champ.

How most farkers wish this story went:

In his excitement at tossing out the first ball, young Jackson threw his pitch way over the catcher's head. The catcher tore off his mask and raced towards the mound. "Dad", uttered a totally shocked Jackson. "You farking loser; you still throw like a farkin' pussy," said dad as he picked up Jackson in his arms and body slammed him to the pitcher's mound.

Nice to see that Fark hasn't become any better in my absence. You idiots, if you didn't think this was news, why did you keep commenting on it and get it greenlit?

illannoyin: I remember when I came home early from a deployment and surprised my wife.

She had a surprise for me too in the form of another woman in bed with her.

/What a wonderful homecoming that was!

and thennnnn...

Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

knbber2: Oh come on, he was on a guard training deployment to Mississippi, not in combat. This rates a news report?

The military actually spreads these stories in hopes it will go viral and help with PR. I became a lot less interested in them when I learned most of them are staged just for publicity.

It's obvious he and his wife like drinking beer as much as I do.

Pantubo: Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

So, you think it to elevate guy who spends 10 weeks in Biloxi, MS to the same regard as a guy who carrying the injured out of a combat zone while being shot at? I think it's pretty heinous how fast and loose we are calling anyone a hero, while cheapening the real acts of heroism out there.

Ok, for the ones that are thinking he is about to head over to the sandbox, it is possible that he may, but highly unlikely. One, he is AIR National Guard. Training in Biloxi MS, I.E. Keesler AFB, which is a tech school base and not a deployment training base. Sounds to me like this air guardsman either just cross trained to a new AFSC, or was just down there to further his skill level in his current AFSC.

so to summarize my previous post, this article is not news.

What a farking attention whore. Really what did this man ever do to deserve being called a hero? Other then take tax payer money for a doing a mediocre job.

Everyone from the President on down to the lowliest of enlisted men should be ashamed of the job they did in Afghanistan and Iraq.

Pantubo: Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

Bwhahahahahahaha! Which party cut funding to veteran hospitals, veteran benefits, and veteran mental health services? Which party verbally abuse active duty personal that have served in combat zones when they publicly disagree with them?

If you said the Republican party you would be a winner.

Much better than coming home and finding his wife sleeping with a family sized bag of Cheetos.

That's pretty damn awesome. Not just for the kid either. How badass would you feel if that was your use of the 'I spent the last X amount of time defending you freedom' card?

Better than a jagerbomb for damn sure.

Pantubo: Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

Well, that is what the military fights for. They sign up so the weak can stay home and complain about how hard it is to get a decent job with a degree in 16th century low country art appreciation. I personally love it when they get into flag bashing as well. After all, they have never carried a friend resting underneath one.

We fight so they can douche freely.

Curious: well i see the "hero" tag has been debased yet again.

simply wearing a uniform, solider, cop, firefighter, etc is not sufficient to rate the hero tag. it wasn't pre 9/11 and it sure as hell isn't post 9/11. not while we have people actually dying and getting no more recognition than "3 marines die in an IED attack".

Eh, firefighters are signing up for a job ( often on a volunteer basis) in which their primary responsibility is to rescue people from fires.

Simply wearing the uniform is not enough, but I think there is a big distinction. Police used to be in that category, but then they became a revenue generation tool.

kim jong-un: Eh, firefighters are signing up for a job ( often on a volunteer basis) in which their primary responsibility is to rescue people from fires.

Yeah, but if you apply hero to anyone who puts on the uniform, doesn't it sort of cheapen the moniker for the men and women who actually go above and beyond AND have put on the uniform?

Tricky Chicken: Pantubo: Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

Well, that is what the military fights for. They sign up so the weak can stay home and complain about how hard it is to get a decent job with a degree in 16th century low country art appreciation. I personally love it when they get into flag bashing as well. After all, they have never carried a friend resting underneath one.

We fight so they can douche freely.

I'm pretty sure we'd be able to stay home and complain anyway... with a trillion dollars more in the US Treasury.

Your welcome, by the way. I pay taxes so guys like you feel manly.

This isn't news, so it's exactly what should be on Fark.

Tricky Chicken: They sign up so the weak can stay home and complain about how hard it is to get a decent job with a degree in 16th century low country art appreciation.

That is either a proper stereotype or a very well done trolling.

8/10

I did a few years in the National Guard after I got off of Active Duty with with Marine Corps.

tl;dr - the National Guard fails at life. Whenever you see a bunch of paunchy doofuses in ACUs attention whoring at a local sporting event, county fair, or whatever - they're probably National Guardsmen. They most likely haven't done shiat but reap TriCare benefits and get paid extra money to show their fat asses up to public events to advertise for the National Guard.

Relatively Obscure: Gyrfalcon: ArkAngel: Relatively Obscure: knbber2: Oh come on, he was on a guard training deployment to Mississippi, not in combat. This rates a news report?

You can always not watch, douchebags.

I didn't.

Zing

A tearful reunion because a Reserve father risked his life for ten weeks in
Biloxi, MS?

These reunions have officially become trite.

douchebag/hater: A tearful reunion because a Reserve father risked his life for ten weeks in Biloxi, MS?
These reunions have officially become trite.

Ok, then please help me understand what's non-trite on Fark news? Snooki? Lootie? Teachers sleeping with underage students? Zimmerman? Republicans? Climate change? Crooked cops? Obama?

Drew's gotta fill these pages with SOMETHING, am I trite?

The douche is strong in this thread

probesport: Tricky Chicken: They sign up so the weak can stay home and complain about how hard it is to get a decent job with a degree in 16th century low country art appreciation.

That is either a proper stereotype or a very well done trolling.

8/10

There have just been articles posted here on Fark with grads complaining about difficulty finding jobs, and then the articles mention that they earned some liberal arts degree or something not specific. I just made the jump that these are likely to be the same 'lib-tards' that complain about military stories. I just think it is nice that this guy got to come back from a job and surprise his kid. I have no problem with publicizing this since it may inspire other dads to get more involved with their kids. I don't care that he was in the reserves or on a corporate retreat.

FWIW, I have no idea what low-country refers to or if they had art in the 16th century worth appreciating.

The man donning a glove and Storm Chasers jersey No. 43 was Jackson's dad, Staff Sgt. Rik Zortman with the Iowa Air National Guard's 132nd Fighter Wing out of Des Moines. He was home a few days early after 10 weeks of training in Biloxi, Miss.

Oh my farking god. He's not even in the Army National Guard, he's in the f*cking Air National Guard?!

knbber2: Oh come on, he was on a guard training deployment to airplane-flying party extravaganza in Mississippi, not in combat. This rates a news report?

All I care to know is if his dad got to board the airplane first on his way home.

freetomato: SilentStrider: Might seem old to us, but to a little kid who hasn't seen his dad in months, it has to be incredibly awesome.

This. I work for DoDEA. No OPSEC broken to say military kids have fears most kids don't face. They are brave little soldiers in their own way.

Yep.

Forecaster18: I'm absolutely as cynical as they come, but come on, assholes, can't you feel the slightest bit of joy for this little kid?

The Navy took my dad away for two years to the Persian Gulf when I was a kid around the same age. That was one of multiple deployments during his career. Ten weeks stateside was nothing.

ZipSplat: I did a few years in the National Guard after I got off of Active Duty with with Marine Corps.

tl;dr - the National Guard fails at life. Whenever you see a bunch of paunchy doofuses in ACUs attention whoring at a local sporting event, county fair, or whatever - they're probably National Guardsmen. They most likely haven't done shiat but reap TriCare benefits and get paid extra money to show their fat asses up to public events to advertise for the National Guard.

Not all Guardsmen are like that. My cousin was sent to Afghanistan and came back 6 months later in body bag. Yes, it can be "cushy", but there are those who are sent overseas and actually serve. Our local units are rather active - just had one group come back after 12-18 months in Iraq/Afghanistan.

On another note, thank you for serving =)

CavalierEternal: Eh, touching and all, but I feel like these "Military dad surprises kids before baseball game" stunts are getting a little repetitive. Pretty soon, the kids are gonna start to suspect something's up when they're randomly selected for pregame on-field activities.

If it were me, I'd just buy my kids regular seats and arrange with the team to borrow the mascot's costume for 10 minutes or so during the seventh inning stretch. That would catch 'em off guard.

Then the truth comes out. Dad wasn't really fighting terrorists in Afghanistan, he lost his job and had to work as a mascot at the local minor league stadium, but was too embarassed to tell the family, so he made up some story about being "deployed".


As for the original story, it's touching of course, but come on, the guy was on training for 10 weeks in the States, not deployed for 2 years in Afghanistan.

Urinal Cake Mix: knbber2: Oh come on, he was on a guard training deployment to Mississippi, not in combat. This rates a news report?

Came to say this. I mean, cool that Dad was able to surprise his kids, but it's not like he was overseas getting shot at by the taliban.

I didn't see a lot of my dad when I was a little kid. He was working in South Seattle during the week and would drive home to Oregon on the weekends to come see my mom and I. Then the next job he had, I felt like he was in a different state every other week. I amassed quite the collection of stuffed animals with random cities printed on ribbons around their neck, but whatever. I was more used to him being gone than him being home.

So we can assume your fark handle isn't because you have a collection of urinal cakes from different cities?

Bet he was stoked to come home and find his wife let herself go like that.

Pantubo: Hey, it's time for libtard a-holes to crap all over the military!

Yay!

Dude, they're not gonna sleep with you.

holy crap. what is it with the jabba military wives?

swingerofbirches: But I see it a lot in the South. You see these goofy car salesman on TV with their disc jockey radio voices welcoming the troops home and thanking them for preserving our freedoms, yada, yada. And whenever a jet flies over people say, "That's the sound of freedom." Although, I've noticed a sharp drop in the Support Our Troops bumper stickers since Bush left office. The word that's described my feeling toward the military sentiment has always been uncomfortable. Not with the people. Just with the sentimentally about it.

Very long, because if you just "get it" this subject needs no words, and if you don't just "get it" it's a complicated subject.

Then you'll probably never understand. My mom was regional president of the DAR (Daughters of the American Revolution) for awhile. One ancestress--who incidentally didn't qualify us because she wasn't a man and therefore wasn't actually in the military--has a plaque to her on the courthouse wall of a town in Tennessee.

See, she lived right near King's Mountain and heard the fighting of the battle there during the American Revolution and knew the men would be hungry afterwards. So she slaughtered the chickens and cooked everything up and after the Tennessee Overmountain Men won, she fed them. All of them.

My mom went up there and couldn't find her hearth to stand on her hearth, but did find the plaque to take a picture of it and bring it back (which is how we know about the plaque--we didn't know before Mom went up looking around.)

The evening of my sister's wedding rehearsal, the groom (who had recently made Chief in the Navy) got the call to be back aboard ship in 48 hours in Charleston. So he had to walk up to the front of the church at the rehearsal and make the announcement. And all of us understood. The call had come, he was a professional, this was what that meant.

The wedding went on as planned, the honeymoon didn't. They reported back to Charleston, and after he reported in, they let him go back to his apartment with his new bride and report aboard as late as possible before the ship actually sailed. That was the best the Navy could do for him. And then he was at sea until the war was over (Gulf War I.)

It's not important to list my other service relatives down through the various wars. Revolutionary to now, we pretty much know who they were, or we try to remember who they were. Sometimes we lose track. We try to have family genealogists dig things up so that we keep up with our veterans.

And sure, there may not be a war critical to preserving our freedom right now at the moment--but you have to have men who stand ready. Because wars tend to come up--ones we have to fight, ones that matter. And we in the South tend to form the backbone of the service who stand ready between wars so there's somebody there to build the rest of an armed forces around when wars come up--the ones we have to fight, the ones that really matter.

And there are always the little wars fought in the little "I can't say" places--the ones little actions that don't exist, the ones you never hear about. A lot of those are necessary to freedom, but if you've never read Sun Tzu or Clausewitz, or you're not just from here, you'll never really understand why.

We see the military in an intimate familial context, over the swathe of US history at minimum, and over the swathe of Western history in general, in bits and pieces.

I saw a farker the other day say something about the US military not having "fought for freedom" in "70 years" -- even if that were true, as if 70 years were a long time. As if "what have you done for me lately" had any element of sanity to it in dealing with the military. As if that attitude hadn't been taken before in history and if the outcomes hadn't been some well known and well established "lessons of history."

People use the word "sentimentality" to describe emotions they can't put a name to because they don't understand them.

No, you're not going to understand respect, reverence, admiration, and gratitude, a sense of familial belonging, pride, a sense of history, a sense of mutual obligation (duty).

I don't mean you don't have those emotions. I just mean that it's like you meet a couple of people who have been close for a long time and been through a lot together. You don't really understand what that means and all the undercurrents between them---you can't really "get it"--without really understanding their history.

And to some degree you can even intellectually know their history together and still not "get it," if it's a very intense history, because knowing it isn't the same thing as experiencing it.

The South and the US military have been through a lot together. We've got "history."

If you want to begin to understand, take a week off work and spend it slowly walking through a place called Arlington National Cemetery.

Then take another week and spend it reading citations for valor. Start with Medal of Honor recipients. Read some of the statements from living recipients of high decorations (or living at the time they received them) about how many similar acts occurred, how frequently, that didn't get written up because they didn't get seen by the right people.

After that, if you still don't begin to understand, I would start to wonder if you truly emotionally "get" the sentimentality people have for puppies and kittens.