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(Huffington Post)   Morgan Freeman: "I think we humans invented God. Titty sprinkles"   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 197
    More: Interesting, god, Vincent Kartheiser  
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7302 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 08 Jun 2012 at 3:44 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-08 01:49:30 PM
Preach it Mr. Freeman.
 
2012-06-08 01:51:51 PM
Morgan Freeman in "The Obvious Redemption."
 
2012-06-08 02:00:23 PM
"So if I believe in God, and I do, it's because I think I'm God," he said.

Goddamn method actors.
 
2012-06-08 02:06:12 PM
Anytime a headline includes the term "titty sprinkles" I am going to vote for it.
 
2012-06-08 02:18:48 PM
"Joking? I was told at the elder's yesterday that I was joking. You know, dear boy, there was an old sinner in the eighteenth century who declared that, if there were no God, he would have to be invented. S'il n'existait pas Dieu, il faudrait l'inventer..."

One of my favorites, read the entire paragraph (or book) here if you like: The Brothers Karamazov

Quote begins toward bottom of page.
 
2012-06-08 02:21:10 PM
"On the first day, the Lord said 'Get busy living, or get busy dyin'"
 
2012-06-08 02:24:27 PM
"So if I believe in God, and I do, it's because I think I'm God," he said.

This will be the only portion of this reported by fundie blogs. Mark my words. All of the context will be gone. He will be an arrogant hollywood atheist who believes that HE is god.
 
2012-06-08 02:29:56 PM
Right on both counts
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-06-08 02:42:03 PM
Maybe God was invented by ancient astronauts. Sort of an interplanetary troll.
 
2012-06-08 02:58:42 PM
Of course we invented "God". All the ancient "Gods" and their "Powers" have been disproven. Our modern ones may, too, in the future.
 
2012-06-08 03:04:22 PM
I wish I could tell you that God fought the good fight, and the devil let him be. I wish I could tell you that - but heaven is no fairy-tale world. Oh wait, yes it is. Never mind.
 
2012-06-08 03:07:02 PM
t3.gstatic.com
I am a God. Not the God, I don't think.
 
2012-06-08 03:49:01 PM
www.wixiban.com
 
2012-06-08 03:56:22 PM
Well that settles that.
 
2012-06-08 03:58:39 PM

kingoomieiii: "So if I believe in God, and I do, it's because I think I'm God," he said.

This will be the only portion of this reported by fundie blogs. Mark my words. All of the context will be gone. He will be an arrogant hollywood atheist who believes that HE is god.


According to Bible-humpers I think that I'm my own God. What the hell does that even mean? I don't get it. They seem to think it means something, though.
 
2012-06-08 04:01:34 PM
Y'know, i can't even read the original novella now without hearing it in his voice, and thanks to FARK, I keep adding "Titty Sprinkles" at the end of each paragraph. Titty sprinkles.
 
2012-06-08 04:09:11 PM
I never read it in Morgan Freeman's voice, I read it as Geoff Peterson doing Morgan Freeman.
 
2012-06-08 04:14:18 PM

James!: Anytime a headline includes the term "titty sprinkles" I am going to vote for it.


Careful, some of us liters may hold you to that...

/won't hold you to it..
//may have to pay someone to write better headlines for me though
 
2012-06-08 04:19:35 PM
F*cking people get your facts straight.

There are Christians who also believe in evolution. The "6,000 year old" morons are just the midwest bible thumping racist hate-mongering asshats.

The rest of them can be pretty logical.

You can't support your argument by saying "well now that we invented God, we must believe that we're only 6,000 years old". Sure if you're arguing about Baptists only. But not all Deity believers.

Apparently playing one gives you a strong strawman ability.

/the headline made me laugh, haven't seen that in a while, wasn't expecting it
 
2012-06-08 04:21:23 PM
He's right. Titty sprinkles.
 
2012-06-08 04:23:14 PM

sure haven't: F*cking people get your facts straight.

There are Christians who also believe in evolution. The "6,000 year old" morons are just the midwest bible thumping racist hate-mongering asshats.

The rest of them can be pretty logical.

You can't support your argument by saying "well now that we invented God, we must believe that we're only 6,000 years old". Sure if you're arguing about Baptists only. But not all Deity believers.

Apparently playing one gives you a strong strawman ability.

/the headline made me laugh, haven't seen that in a while, wasn't expecting it


You haven't met the few that manage to believe that the man's only been here for 6,000 years AND understand that dinosaurs are millions of years old.

There is a look of pain when the two thoughts finally meet, then a string of "But, God is love" and other desperate words to try and recover from the cognitive dissonance.

It's just another chip on the pile of "Most people don't really even think about it".
 
2012-06-08 04:30:12 PM
Like a twinkie.....like a twinkie....
 
2012-06-08 04:30:35 PM
unfollowingjesus.com
 
2012-06-08 04:31:18 PM
I INVENTED GOD!

And I will strike down with furious anger at anyone who claims otherwise.
 
2012-06-08 04:39:40 PM
Many of us are entertained and awed when we hear Morgan Freeman narrating. But in his mind everything he hears is narrated as a conversation between Fran Drescher and Victoria Jackson. It makes him say crazy things and nail his step granddaughter.
 
2012-06-08 04:42:42 PM

TravisBickle62: I INVENTED GOD!

And I will strike down with furious anger at anyone who claims otherwise.


Whatever. I patented it first so prove it or pay up.
 
2012-06-08 04:43:56 PM

sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution. The "6,000 year old" morons are just the midwest bible thumping racist hate-mongering asshats.


Well, the only ones I've mainly seen trumpeting the "6000" or whatever many years argument have been militant anti-theists on Fark and similar message boards. Anyone who actually has actually read the account in Genesis realizes that whatever time was before the Sun and Earth were created, it wasn't in 24 hour days and 12 month years.
/still haven't heard where they started counting from yet either.
 
2012-06-08 04:51:54 PM

sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution.


Catholics have acknowledged it. At least when I went to church as a kid, and CCD... it was never mentioned. In reality I think Catholics are the least crazy and most accepting major religion (in terms of beliefs). They're more interested in recruitment efforts... and that means bending to all sorts of culture's idiosyncrasies.

You're not going to get a bunch of Mexicans, Africans, you name it by holding on to crazy beliefs.
 
2012-06-08 04:52:14 PM

Kurmudgeon: sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution. The "6,000 year old" morons are just the midwest bible thumping racist hate-mongering asshats.

Well, the only ones I've mainly seen trumpeting the "6000" or whatever many years argument have been militant anti-theists on Fark and similar message boards. Anyone who actually has actually read the account in Genesis realizes that whatever time was before the Sun and Earth were created, it wasn't in 24 hour days and 12 month years.
/still haven't heard where they started counting from yet either.


You need to get out more.

My wife got mailed "God Doesn't Believe In Atheists" by one of her fellow singers in a local women's choir shortly after she her response to "What church do you go to" was that she didn't attend church. She got a "But your so nice!" in response. This young woman was a true blue believer that the Earth was only 6,000 years old, and the atheists can't be nice people (and Mormons are evil cultists, but that's a different subject that was touched upon).

A coworker of mine is pretty fundie in most ways, and goes to a fundie church. He's got a BS in geology though, and understands the universe is at least 13 billion years old and the Earth is 4 billion, give or take a billion years. He believes in evolution (the soul is what God created and infused in man) and a literal interpretation of the New Testament and a more allegorical interpretation of the Old Testament.

He had to stop telling people at his church his real passion is geology and not computer programming when asked about his job, because people kept trying to correct him on exactly how wrong geologists and other scientists were on the age of the earth.
 
2012-06-08 04:53:03 PM
Well, who did you THINK invented Him?
Anteaters?
Iguanas, perhaps?
 
2012-06-08 04:53:45 PM
I have a fridge magnet that says "I Wish Morgan Freeman Narrated My Life". It is way cooler than the pictures of babies of people I don't know that it holds up.
 
2012-06-08 04:58:05 PM

Kurmudgeon: Well, the only ones I've mainly seen trumpeting the "6000" or whatever many years argument have been militant anti-theists on Fark and similar message boards


You believe "Young Earth Creationism" was invented by atheists?

Here, let me introduce you to the Creation Research Society and the Institute for Creation Research.
 
2012-06-08 05:00:51 PM
I think Morgan is banging his grand daughter.

/like I care about the n*gros.
 
2012-06-08 05:02:00 PM
 
2012-06-08 05:02:29 PM

Nana's Vibrator: Many of us are entertained and awed when we hear Morgan Freeman narrating. But in his mind everything he hears is narrated as a conversation between Fran Drescher and Victoria Jackson. It makes him say crazy things and nail his step granddaughter.


I've never understood the drama behind that. She's not related to him by blood, so the only thing I can think of that would be remotely objectionable is the age difference, but sometimes that works out. It's not like he was nailing his actual granddaughter. THAT would be gross.
 
2012-06-08 05:05:20 PM

Kurmudgeon: Well, the only ones I've mainly seen trumpeting the "6000" or whatever many years argument have been militant anti-theists on Fark and similar message boards. Anyone who actually has actually read the account in Genesis realizes that whatever time was before the Sun and Earth were created, it wasn't in 24 hour days and 12 month years.
/still haven't heard where they started counting from yet either.


You walk around with blinders on or something? Ever hear of "Dr." Kent Hovind? His idiot son Eric Hovind? How about Ken Ham? Ian Juby? Sarah Palin? I can point you to huge websites with thousands of registered users that preach Young Earth Creationism. And more Youtube channels than you can shake a stick at.

Before geology rammed a pickaxe into the idea of Biblical literalism, the default position of almost all Christians was that the world was created in six actual days and was less than 10,000 years old.

And if you really want to know where they're counting from, you might want to educate yourself.
 
2012-06-08 05:05:25 PM

Cubicle Jockey: Kurmudgeon: Well, the only ones I've mainly seen trumpeting the "6000" or whatever many years argument have been militant anti-theists on Fark and similar message boards

You believe "Young Earth Creationism" was invented by atheists?

Here, let me introduce you to the Creation Research Society and the Institute for Creation Research.


I think he was saying that the portrayal of it as a "mainstream" belief is fabricated or at the very least exaggerated by atheists because it's such an easy straw man to defeat. And it is... because in current Evangelical Christianity it is largely considered a fringe belief and some seminaries have gone so far as to decry it cult fodder.
 
2012-06-08 05:06:58 PM

sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution.


I never understand that one. Why did he make the appendix? Why is our eye upside down and backwards? Our eyesight is farked. Why would that be?
 
2012-06-08 05:08:14 PM

StoPPeRmobile: sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution.

I never understand that one. Why did he make the appendix? Why is our eye upside down and backwards? Our eyesight is farked. Why would that be?


for the lulz
 
2012-06-08 05:09:55 PM
www.millionaireplayboy.com

What does God need with titty sprinkles?
 
2012-06-08 05:10:27 PM

Ed Grubermann: kingoomieiii: "So if I believe in God, and I do, it's because I think I'm God," he said.

This will be the only portion of this reported by fundie blogs. Mark my words. All of the context will be gone. He will be an arrogant hollywood atheist who believes that HE is god.

According to Bible-humpers I think that I'm my own God. What the hell does that even mean? I don't get it. They seem to think it means something, though.


It's a way of saying you are a satanist.
 
2012-06-08 05:10:55 PM

StoPPeRmobile: sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution.

I never understand that one. Why did he make the appendix? Why is our eye upside down and backwards? Our eyesight is farked. Why would that be?


Why is there a sewage facility near a playground? Why do we intake food and liquid through the same tube that we get air?
 
2012-06-08 05:11:05 PM

Yuri Futanari: StoPPeRmobile: sure haven't: There are Christians who also believe in evolution.

I never understand that one. Why did he make the appendix? Why is our eye upside down and backwards? Our eyesight is farked. Why would that be?

for the lulz


Yeah, it's what I would do.
 
2012-06-08 05:13:01 PM

Coco LaFemme: nail his step granddaughter.

I've never understood the drama behind that. She's not related to him by blood, so the only thing I can think of that would be remotely objectionable is the age difference, but sometimes that works out. It's not like he was nailing his actual granddaughter. THAT would be gross.


Was she even born when he was married to her mom? Its a tiny bit creepy, but not really.

Woody Allen and Soon-Yi Previn comes off far creepier.
 
2012-06-08 05:13:21 PM

sure haven't: The rest of them can be pretty logical.



In no way shape or form can people who honestly believe in the Christian god be logical.
 
2012-06-08 05:14:40 PM
Oh, sure... from the guy who got to play the G-man himself, no less!

/titty sprinkles
//i bet he loves that...youyou...himhim
 
2012-06-08 05:14:57 PM
"If God has created us in His image, we have more than returned the compliment." -Voltaire-

"Gods always behave like the people who created them"
-- Zora Neale Hurston-

"God created man in his own image. And man, being a gentleman, returned the favor."
- Rousseau -

"You know your god is man-made when he hates all the same people you do."
-Anon-
 
2012-06-08 05:17:05 PM
 
2012-06-08 05:17:27 PM
I never hated God, it's His fan club I can't stand.
 
2012-06-08 05:18:20 PM
+1 to Subby for making me hear Morgan Freeman's voice say 'titty sprinkles'.

/The world needs more titty sprinkles.
 
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