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Woman's toothbrush retrieved before becoming Anal B, NATO camps Al-Qaeda's respawn point, and Tom Cruise in Jack Reacher Round 2: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 5/27 - 6/2
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-06-05 10:34:21 AM (5 comments) | Permalink

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2248 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Jun 2012 at 10:37 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Nothing new this week. Enjoy!

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-05-27 to Sat 2012-06-02:

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  Man disappears in Niagara Falls whirlpool; presumed to be spinning in his grave    
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  Woman swallows toothbrush while brushing her teeth. Surgeons remove it before Oral B becomes Anal B    
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  Afghanistan and Iraq vets deploy to help citizens of a violent region ruled by armed gangs and resisted by local religious elders fearful of losing power: Baltimore    
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  Al-Qaeda #2 killed again in Afghanistan. It's almost as if NATO is camping his respawn point    
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  Hand, foot and now a partial body in Montreal. Could this be the work of separatists?  

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  Search for missing Idaho pilot spreads across wide area, possibly like the pilot himself    
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  All 28 living Victoria Cross and George Cross winners meet up for lunch, comparison of giant brass balls    
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  French journalist claims FARC captors were respectful, obviously never had time to visit the politics tab    
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  Mick Jagger called on to mediate Peruvian mining dispute. In other news, Henry Kissinger will be touring with Keith Richards this summer    
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  14-year-old Snigdha Nandipati wins Scripps National Spelling Bee by correctly spelling Snigdha Nandipati    
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  Bear eats corpse of convicted killer. I bet that was a *puts on sunglasses* Kodiak moment    
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Sports:

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  Barry Bonds wants a head role in the Giants' organization    
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  College football players inch closer to getting paid $300 a month, while detractors stick to their argument that such unimaginable riches would ruin the sport    
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  Queen attends races. *STOMP, STOMP, CLAP*    
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Geek:

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  Sleepy drivers found to be just as dangerous as drunk drivers. Cops immediately step up patrols outside all art house movie theaters    
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  New cannabis plant, without the high, developed for people who want to use medical marijuana and not get stoned. Next up: Viagra that makes you just want to be friends    
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  Non-sexual social contact can raise body temperature, according to research conducted at Comic-Con    
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Entertainment:

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  History Channel's Hatfields & McCoys sets record for cable viewership. How can this be? It's just a show about a famous part of America's past... There are no truckers on ice or pawn shops or anything... it's just... history    
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  New Tom Cruise movie "One Shot" gets retitled to "Jack Reacher." Cruise said to be excited for the sequel, "Jack Reacher Round 2"    
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  Teen Mom show will go out "with a bang" in its final season. Wait, isn't that how the show came about in the first place?    
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Politics:

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  The Obama administration is working to arm Syrian opposition fighters. Mitt Romney disagrees with this approach and thinks we should arm Syrian opposition fighters    
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  Romneytron 2012 receives official candidate1144 upgrade to hardware. Begins downloading DERPware attack utilities    
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  Michigan Congressman Thaddeus McCotter to end write-in campaign for 6th term, return to Victorian novel from whence he came    
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Business:

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  Cracker Barrel taps two new directors, gets ready to pay out two more sexual harassment settlements    
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  New Jersey lawyers sue Tropicana, claiming the company uses too many chemicals and isn't as 'natural' as they advertise. Tropicana then counter-sues New Jersey for same claim    
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  The setup of the 17-country euro currency union is unsustainable, the head of the European Central Bank told EU leaders, after apparently waking up from a three-year nap    
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· · ·

5 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2012-06-05 10:38:58 AM  
My personal favorite of the week:

Hand, foot and now a partial body in Montreal. Could this be the work of separatists?

Give yourself a hand, subby. Or two. Really, as many as you need.
 
2012-06-05 10:41:52 AM  
lh6.googleusercontent.comView Full Size



/do they have AOL on the inner tubes now?
 
2012-06-05 10:51:37 AM  
Some really good ones here, although I still think Reacher Round 2 is a candidate for HOY.
 
2012-06-05 12:49:05 PM  

Unfreakable:

Give yourself a hand, subby. Or two. Really, as many as you need.


Thanks. If you liked that you may like this oldie of mine:

"Two dead at Arby's. Oven mitt sought for questioning"
 
2012-06-05 01:37:44 PM  
Another #2 bites the dust..
 
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