If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Consumerist)   Taco Bell sells 100 million Doritos Locos Tacos in 10 weeks. Sales reach an amazing 8.0 on the sphincter scale   (consumerist.com) divider line 173
    More: Spiffy, Taco Bell, Doritos Locos, Doritos, oc register, staining  
•       •       •

5643 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Jun 2012 at 12:25 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



173 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-06-05 12:56:55 PM
i734.photobucket.com
 
2012-06-05 12:57:00 PM
So good, tastes just like meat.
 
2012-06-05 12:57:12 PM

Rapmaster2000: [t1.gstatic.com image 303x166]

We made up this story about someone driving 900 miles for a taco, and cast these attractive hipster approximations in a Volvo 245 to try and convince you that this really happened.

File under commercials I hate.


That one is third in my Commercial Hate File. The Popeyes Cajun woman who supposedly makes all of the chicken and talks like "dis y'all" is number two.

Number one is ANY McDonalds commercial targeted to an African-American audience. From breakdancing Ronald, to rapping Grimace, to those Sambos who spin on their heads for a McSmoothie. They can all go away.
 
2012-06-05 12:57:36 PM

Rapmaster2000: It was always pretty crappy. You just have better taste now.


My wife and I keep having this issue. Olive Garden, for instance. It's like 1 notch above fast food, except their soup and breadsticks. Their pasta is probably canned. All of it. We make better at home easily. But, I remember it used to be good. Ah well.
 
2012-06-05 12:59:36 PM

max_pooper: I was sick last week. I had bad case of the runs. I figured what the hell, it's not like Taco Bell is going to make this any worse. So I ran down to my local Bell and loaded up on all the crap I love but normally avoid due it's ability to void my bowels. The explosive dump I took about 20 minutes before mowing down a grilled stuffed burrito, a couple of double decker tacos, a mexican pizza, an enchirito and a beef meximelt or three was the last bout of diarrhea I had. Mass quantities of Taco Bell actually cured my ills.

\Yeah, I sound do fat.
\\Not really fat though.
\\\Still surprised that it didn't coalesce into some sort of super duper pooper.


Dude, you had an enchirito AND a meximelt in one go? I'm surprised you didn't shart your way to the moon! Now if you had eaten a beef chilito....

/back in my day we had something called a Bell Beefer
//eat that and it's "to the moon, Alice!"
 
2012-06-05 12:59:43 PM

MythDragon: Is it suddenly popular to hate anything that is a chain resturant?


No, and I think you're confused. It's not "hating" to say Taco Bell serves crap; that's their goddamn business model. It's like saying Firestone sells tires or your mom sells blowjobs. There is nothing controversial about calling a spade a spade. I lived off Taco Bell when I was poor. I stopped when I could afford food.

I AM agonna hatin' on anyone who tries to convince others something is better than it really is, which pretty much includes every single chain restaurants' marketing and PR departments.
 
2012-06-05 01:01:51 PM

thurstonxhowell: bow: They don't taste that different, and you end up with orange fingers.

This. It was just as tasty as the rest of their stuff, but they managed to make it even more messy. This is why stoners don't usually get to make decisions.

bdub77: I haven't willingly eaten Taco Bell in years. Way too many good Mexican options in the area.

Taco Bell isn't meant to compete with sit-down restaurants. Let me know when there's a better taco joint with a drive through that can have me out of there with food in hand in 2 minutes. Especially if they have a drink that mixes better with rum than the limeade sparkler. Oh dear god do I love my rum and limeade.


www.burritowings.com
Atleast their breakfast burritos. There so dense and good.

YMMV
 
2012-06-05 01:02:33 PM
**they're
 
2012-06-05 01:02:45 PM

Rapmaster2000: We made up this story about someone driving 900 miles for a taco, and cast these attractive hipster approximations in a Volvo 245 to try and convince you that this really happened.

File under commercials I hate.


I love that you called out the 245. It's the hipster Bentley. Since the local supply is getting thin, I've been seeing a lot more of them buying beat up Saab 900s.
 
2012-06-05 01:05:09 PM
Tried one. Don't see what all the fuss is about. Barely even tasted the Dorito.

Taco Bell is fine, but only when its late at night and I just don't give a fark.
 
2012-06-05 01:08:30 PM
I really used to dig Taco Bell when I was a kid. I still go there a couple of times a year because I get a weird craving for a bean and cheese burrito. Of course, the burrito that I imagined in my craving is always much better than the real thing.
 
2012-06-05 01:10:16 PM

Wade_Wilson: Tried one. Don't see what all the fuss is about. Barely even tasted the Dorito.

Taco Bell is fine, but only when its late at night and I just don't give a fark.


this. Although I had a bag of Cheetos the other day (my wife got them and didn't like them) and it seems they aren't adding as much of the fake cheese powder as they used to. -That's actually my complaint about the Dorito Taco... not enough fake cheese powder.

/was fully expecting my hands to be covered in orange afterwards... sadly disappointed.
 
2012-06-05 01:10:26 PM

DROxINxTHExWIND: Rapmaster2000: [t1.gstatic.com image 303x166]

We made up this story about someone driving 900 miles for a taco, and cast these attractive hipster approximations in a Volvo 245 to try and convince you that this really happened.

File under commercials I hate.

That one is third in my Commercial Hate File. The Popeyes Cajun woman who supposedly makes all of the chicken and talks like "dis y'all" is number two.

Number one is ANY McDonalds commercial targeted to an African-American audience. From breakdancing Ronald, to rapping Grimace, to those Sambos who spin on their heads for a McSmoothie. They can all go away.


I figure McDonalds already has every white person in its sway, so now it's trying to grab black people in an inadvertently hilarious way.
 
2012-06-05 01:10:50 PM
Obscure local taco stand thread!

s3.amazonaws.com

media-cdn.tripadvisor.com
 
2012-06-05 01:12:12 PM
Mexican food > "Mexican Style" food > TACO Bell
 
2012-06-05 01:12:32 PM

MythDragon: Is it suddenly popular to hate anything that is a chain resturant?


No, it's just sensible to hate food that tastes like f*cking salty cat food.

But if you feel the need to white knight Taco Bell and PF Chang's for some bizarre, pathological reason, I'm not going to stop you.
 
2012-06-05 01:12:34 PM
I bought exactly 1 of the 100 million DL Tacos. And that's all I will buy. Ever.
 
2012-06-05 01:12:45 PM

MythDragon: Everyone bashing Taco Bell:
[wtfhub.com image 400x412]

Is it suddenly popular to hate anything that is a chain resturant? Peoplehere on fark have bashed everything from TB and Burger King to Chili's and P.F. Chang's.


This. Thisthisthisthisthis.

I get tired of the food-hipster attitude of "Oh that sucks, it isn't up to my exquisite standards!" Nobody gives a shiat about your standards. If you don't like fast food that's 100% fine but it isn't anything to brag on, and isn't any reason to hate on it.

Is Taco Bell wonderful Mexican food? Hell no. It's not even really Mexican, more an American take on it. Ok so what? It is cheap fast food and apparently plenty of people like it or they wouldn't be so damn common. Hell you even find them in Europe. It's fine. If you like it, good deal eat there when it pleases you. If you don't like it, also good deal, don't eat there.

Funny thing is the people I know that I would say have the most refined palettes are also able to appreciate fast food on occasion for what it is: Unhealthy, greasy, but tasty junk food. They don't eat it often but they can enjoy it on occasion. The people who hate on it are hipster types who think that makes them cool, and often eat just as unhealthy, just from other sources.
 
2012-06-05 01:13:28 PM

sigdiamond2000: MythDragon: Is it suddenly popular to hate anything that is a chain resturant?

No, it's just sensible to hate food that tastes like f*cking salty cat food.

.


Some of these poor people must have lost their taste buds in the war on sensible cusine.
 
2012-06-05 01:14:45 PM

exick: I admit, I tried one. It was exactly what I expected, so I won't be trying it again.


This
 
2012-06-05 01:15:41 PM
Hard to believe such an obvious gimmick has proven to be so popular.
 
2012-06-05 01:16:22 PM

fatalvenom: Rapmaster2000: We made up this story about someone driving 900 miles for a taco, and cast these attractive hipster approximations in a Volvo 245 to try and convince you that this really happened.

File under commercials I hate.

I love that you called out the 245. It's the hipster Bentley. Since the local supply is getting thin, I've been seeing a lot more of them buying beat up Saab 900s.


Jesus, that's it. And they're everywhere. Apple put hipsters in a 245 in it's road trip commercial with siri. Snickers uses a 244 in its road trip commercials.

I've been seeing a lot of 850s now as all the 244/245s have been taken.
 
2012-06-05 01:16:28 PM
Atleast their breakfast burritos. There so dense and good.

YMMV


I love those Alberto's knock off places. I think every decent size city in Southern CA has a real Alberto's plus at least 2 or 3 knock off's with stunningly similar menus.
 
2012-06-05 01:18:23 PM
I was feeling self-abusive one day and decided to give those Doritos Locos Tacos a try.

Holy farking salt lick, Batman!

Just take a regular Taco Bell taco, cover it with salt and MSG, and enjoy. I don't mean a sprinkling of salt and MSG, either. I want you to pour a full tablespoon of each right into the center, so every bite is chock-full of Sodium goodness.

The shells actually have MORE of the "flavor powder" per square inch than actual Doritos! It's insane! My blood pressure shot through the roof after the first bite!

Also, the Doritos shell is far sturdier than a regular shell, so after taking one bite the entire thing will fracture into several large pieces. It's like biting into plate glass.

Never again.
 
2012-06-05 01:18:24 PM
To all the farkers complaining about orange fingers:

truthofaliar.com

DONT TAKE IT OUT OF THE PAPER FINGERPROTECTOR FOR FARKS SAKE
 
2012-06-05 01:18:26 PM

sycraft: MythDragon: Everyone bashing Taco Bell:
[wtfhub.com image 400x412]

Is it suddenly popular to hate anything that is a chain resturant? Peoplehere on fark have bashed everything from TB and Burger King to Chili's and P.F. Chang's.

This. Thisthisthisthisthis.

I get tired of the food-hipster attitude of "Oh that sucks, it isn't up to my exquisite standards!" Nobody gives a shiat about your standards. If you don't like fast food that's 100% fine but it isn't anything to brag on, and isn't any reason to hate on it.

Is Taco Bell wonderful Mexican food? Hell no. It's not even really Mexican, more an American take on it. Ok so what? It is cheap fast food and apparently plenty of people like it or they wouldn't be so damn common. Hell you even find them in Europe. It's fine. If you like it, good deal eat there when it pleases you. If you don't like it, also good deal, don't eat there.

Funny thing is the people I know that I would say have the most refined palettes are also able to appreciate fast food on occasion for what it is: Unhealthy, greasy, but tasty junk food. They don't eat it often but they can enjoy it on occasion. The people who hate on it are hipster types who think that makes them cool, and often eat just as unhealthy, just from other sources.


I love this new form of political correctness that seems to have swept this country in recent years where nothing is allowed to be inherently better than anything else, and to express an opinion about the merits of anything means that you're an "elitist", or a "hipster", or that you "think yer better'n me!11".
 
2012-06-05 01:19:16 PM
I had one. It was saltier than a regular TB taco. Had no interesting in having another.
 
2012-06-05 01:20:03 PM
Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.
 
2012-06-05 01:21:17 PM

antidumbass: Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.


I'm actually cool with that. It doesn't have any calories.
 
2012-06-05 01:23:19 PM

Rapmaster2000: [t1.gstatic.com image 303x166]

We made up this story about someone driving 900 miles for a taco, and cast these attractive hipster approximations in a Volvo 245 to try and convince you that this really happened.

File under commercials I hate.


Man the butt hurt in your post... over a commercial.

// butt hurt probably from tacos.
 
2012-06-05 01:23:50 PM
as a proud stoner, I try to make "never" my frequency of any fast food places (other than fried chicken of course)
 
2012-06-05 01:23:56 PM
There are really no other drive through "Mexican food" options, at least around where I live.

There are tons of burger joints. I would think giving Taco Bell some competition in the drive through market would be good. Not sure why no others have popped up.
 
2012-06-05 01:25:42 PM

antidumbass: Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.


Silicon is a trace mineral found in your body that promotes bone and cartilage health. See, Taco Bell is healthy!
 
2012-06-05 01:26:23 PM
Chemical-coated taco shell made from some corn-like substance. Check
Taco Bell's Almost Real Meat slurry/soup. Check
Lettuce, bathed in sulfites and packaged three months ago. Check
Something vaguely similar to tomatoes, also packaged three months ago. Check
Sour cream without any real cream. Check
All thrown together by someone who doesn't have enough English to be able to read the "Employees must wash hands" sing in the bathroom. Check

It's a hit!
 
2012-06-05 01:27:27 PM

The Southern Logic Company: To all the farkers complaining about orange fingers:

[truthofaliar.com image 600x400]

DONT TAKE IT OUT OF THE PAPER FINGERPROTECTOR FOR FARKS SAKE


Maybe I could just eat the flimsy cardboard too, probably would improve the texture. Personally I would like to see them make a taco shell out of Funyuns next.
 
2012-06-05 01:27:31 PM

antidumbass: Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.


A lot of ground meat contains 'sand' it stops it from clumping up it has nothing to do with making it 'feel heavier'.
 
2012-06-05 01:28:33 PM
When there is a taco bell halfway between the bars and your apartment, it is very difficult to avoid giving into the locos.
 
2012-06-05 01:30:51 PM
the TB Dorito commercials make my gag reflex kick in. that is a feat in itself.

/would rather watch Divine eat poop than watch you eat Taco Bells
 
2012-06-05 01:33:31 PM

antidumbass: Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.


It's probably the most healthy thing in it. Silicone dioxide is an anti-caking agent and is found in many food products. It's harmless, since sand is inert.
 
2012-06-05 01:38:35 PM

sigdiamond2000: I love this new form of political correctness that seems to have swept this country in recent years where nothing is allowed to be inherently better than anything else, and to express an opinion about the merits of anything means that you're an "elitist", or a "hipster", or that you "think yer better'n me!11".


I came to the conclusion a while back that most of the people who piss and moan about hipsters are unsophisticated, insecure dullards who are scared shiatless to try anything new or think about anything. I can't wait for the day when people able to read and write and speak coherently gets you labeled a "hipster".
 
2012-06-05 01:40:07 PM
It's just a Taco Supreme with a shell that crumbles in your hand when you eat it, and leaves your taco all over the paper it was wrapped in. Do yourself a favor and just order a Taco Supreme. At least it will stay together while you're eating it.
 
2012-06-05 01:40:28 PM
I sometimes eat my chili with a small side or Doritos. They're the perfect crunchy compliment. I knew these would go over well. Doritos taste good with seasoned turkey meat/ ground beef (cue the "its not meat" joke). But for some reason, I have no desire to eat a Doritos taco. I'm not one of these food elitist. I just don't want one. I think its that I subconsciously remember the controversy about the consistency of their meat a few years ago. The same thing happened to me with Dominos Pizza after the guy jizzed on one a long time ago. I still don't eat there.
 
2012-06-05 01:40:40 PM

The Southern Logic Company: To all the farkers complaining about orange fingers:



DONT TAKE IT OUT OF THE PAPER FINGERPROTECTOR FOR FARKS SAKE


Um... you mean that's not a slightly thinner outer layer shell? shiat
 
2012-06-05 01:40:42 PM

El Freak: I came to the conclusion a while back that most of the people who piss and moan about hipsters are unsophisticated, insecure dullards who are scared shiatless to try anything new or think about anything. I can't wait for the day when people being able to read and write and speak coherently gets you labeled a "hipster".


Oh FFS. At least I'll never get called a hipster.
 
2012-06-05 01:42:51 PM

JackieRabbit: antidumbass: Taco Bhell meat contains Silicon Dioxide, or powdered sand if you need it spelled out.

Makes the taco or burrito *feel* heavier, like you got your money's worth. Anyone okay with this may continue to eat sand.

It's probably the most healthy thing in it. Silicone dioxide is an anti-caking agent and is found in many food products. It's harmless, since sand is inert.


No kidding. It's also used in toothpaste. Doesn't mean I'm going to stop brushing my teeth.
 
2012-06-05 01:43:40 PM
Little-known Taco Bell fact: you can add guacamole to everything they make for $0.25-$0.50 per item depending on your location. Their guacamole real, no dairy, no vegetable oil. Just avocado, tomato, onion, lime, spices, and emulsifier/stabilizer. Better than the stuff most people buy at the grocery store.
 
2012-06-05 01:45:25 PM

El Freak: I came to the conclusion a while back that most of the people who piss and moan about hipsters are unsophisticated, insecure dullards who are scared shiatless to try anything new or think about anything. I can't wait for the day when people able to read and write and speak coherently gets you labeled a "hipster".


I'd rather being the annoying guy who gets excited over silly things than the surly asshole who hates the excited guy. I'm neither but given the choice I'd pick happy over asshole every time.
 
2012-06-05 01:47:33 PM

Egoy3k: El Freak: I came to the conclusion a while back that most of the people who piss and moan about hipsters are unsophisticated, insecure dullards who are scared shiatless to try anything new or think about anything. I can't wait for the day when people able to read and write and speak coherently gets you labeled a "hipster".

I'd rather being the annoying guy who gets excited over silly things than the surly asshole who hates the excited guy. I'm neither but given the choice I'd pick happy over asshole every time.


Said it better than I was going to say it.
 
2012-06-05 01:51:06 PM

Mixolydian Master: thurstonxhowell: bow: They don't taste that different, and you end up with orange fingers.

This. It was just as tasty as the rest of their stuff, but they managed to make it even more messy. This is why stoners don't usually get to make decisions.

bdub77: I haven't willingly eaten Taco Bell in years. Way too many good Mexican options in the area.

Taco Bell isn't meant to compete with sit-down restaurants. Let me know when there's a better taco joint with a drive through that can have me out of there with food in hand in 2 minutes. Especially if they have a drink that mixes better with rum than the limeade sparkler. Oh dear god do I love my rum and limeade.

[www.burritowings.com image 500x354]
Atleast their breakfast burritos. There so dense and good.

YMMV


Are in Sacramento or San Diego?

also, Del Taco is superior - SUPERIOR - to Taco Bell
 
2012-06-05 01:52:12 PM
Meh, I tried one just to see what the rage was all about. Meh.
 
Displayed 50 of 173 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report