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(Lex 18)   Daughter: hey, look what my pet bird can dance to. Parents: he's going to hell   (lex18.com) divider line 124
    More: Asinine, Mom and Dad, Willow Smith, viral videos, Larry Bird  
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13511 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jun 2012 at 9:56 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-06-04 08:13:15 AM
FTFA: "I used to love rock and then Jesus came into my heart and took it completely away".

Religion, is there anything it can't do?

/please pray for the bird.
 
2012-06-04 08:52:07 AM

AbbeySomeone: FTFA: "I used to love rock and then Jesus came into my heart and took it completely away".


He makes that Jesus guy sounds like a real jerk.
 
2012-06-04 08:55:12 AM
"We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

So I guess "Onward Christian Soldiers" is also out of the question. That's got a pretty good back beat. And as far as repetition goes, "God in Three Persons" is right up there.
 
2012-06-04 09:13:58 AM
*click*

"Kentucky"

*close*
 
2012-06-04 09:17:05 AM
They sound like they could use a cockatoo, if you know what I mean.
 
2012-06-04 09:20:47 AM
They'll get over it.
 
2012-06-04 09:21:08 AM

Mugato: They sound like they could use a cockatoo, if you know what I mean.


*wink
 
2012-06-04 09:28:15 AM

Marcus Aurelius: "We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

So I guess "Onward Christian Soldiers" is also out of the question. That's got a pretty good back beat. And as far as repetition goes, "God in Three Persons" is right up there.


Downbeats are fine. Those are old time religious marching conquering songs. Part of our European Heritage.

Now that backbeat syncopated tribal stuff, now, you better just knock that stuff off right now. Leads to sin, and sin leads to hell.



// amidoinitrite?

// Just look up any anti-rock music rant from the 1950s made by a southern preacher or churchy person in general.
 
2012-06-04 09:35:04 AM
He'll be right there with Hitler's dog, Nixon's dog, and the Lassie that mauled Timmy
 
2012-06-04 09:51:36 AM

pseudowho: He makes that Jesus guy sounds like a real jerk.


well, there's no arguing he's holier-than-thou.
 
2012-06-04 09:59:22 AM
Jesus ain't got no soul.
 
2012-06-04 09:59:52 AM
"I used to love rock and then Jesus Christ came in my heart and took it completely away," Gary Richie said.

Jesus did what where?!
 
2012-06-04 10:00:52 AM
FTFA: "We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

Why are reborn Christfags such Douchbags?
 
2012-06-04 10:00:59 AM
Well they sound like some really fun people to be around don't they.
 
2012-06-04 10:01:10 AM
he was loving a rock before he met Jesus

turns out Jesus was the rock all along
lol
 
2012-06-04 10:01:30 AM
If God didn't want us to rock, he wouldn't have invented Bon Scott.
 
2012-06-04 10:01:33 AM
I don't approve of the listed songs either, but not for religious reasons, only because they're shiate.
 
2012-06-04 10:03:00 AM

Petit_Merdeux: *click*

"Kentucky"

*close*


Yeah Kentucky is a different level of stupid.

And maybe they just hated the black music, it is Kentucky after all.
 
2012-06-04 10:04:13 AM
These parents sound like a lot of fun.
 
2012-06-04 10:04:40 AM

AlwaysRightBoy: Jesus ain't got no soul.


Jesus is just alright with me.....oh yeah!!!!
 
2012-06-04 10:05:23 AM
Which bible verse condemns rock and roll again? I seem to have missed that one.
 
2012-06-04 10:06:29 AM
To be fair, the music in question IS pretty awful...
 
2012-06-04 10:07:35 AM
Birds don't have souls, so it's not like it was going to Heaven anyway.
 
2012-06-04 10:08:23 AM

Twigz221: Which bible verse condemns rock and roll again? I seem to have missed that one.


"Let he who is without sin cast the first rock. And may it roll, and roll, and roll for eternity"

I believe that their issue is that only a messiah is allowed to open at rock concerts.
 
2012-06-04 10:08:26 AM
"We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

No beat? No repetition? YOUR music must really SUCK.

/amateur musician
//definitely getting a ROTFLMAO out of this
///does playing syncopated rhythms mean I'm damned????
 
2012-06-04 10:08:36 AM
"I used to love rock and then Jesus came into my heart and took it completely away".

He's climin' in yo' windows, snatchin' yo' music up!
Tryin' to rape 'em, so you all need to,
Hide yo' records, Hide yo' vinyls!
 
2012-06-04 10:10:50 AM
Translation: our daughter can be attention whore as long as she doesn't use whore music. Praise Jeebus!
 
2012-06-04 10:10:53 AM
Are you saying Jesus Christ can't rock out?!?
 
2012-06-04 10:11:07 AM
I grew up in a very strict Southern Baptist household (of which my father was a pastor), and one day I was listening to Jimi Hendrix on the old '45, and my father came home, took the record and smashed it on the wall and shouted 'I will not have devil music in my house'
 
2012-06-04 10:12:57 AM
christ condems me to listen to Casting Crowns or Chris Tomlin. those 2 names ONLY.
granted each CD is like someone slamming my head into concrete for 68 minutes.

at least i'm not humming along or singing to music like i used to when i listened to what i THOUGHT was quality music.
 
2012-06-04 10:12:58 AM

flypusher713: "We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

No beat? No repetition? YOUR music must really SUCK.

/amateur musician
//definitely getting a ROTFLMAO out of this
///does playing syncopated rhythms mean I'm damned????


It's kind of like a kosher thing. You can't mix two disparate beats together in the same song. And you have to execute those beats in the most cruel and inhumane way possible.
 
2012-06-04 10:13:49 AM

Kraftwerk Orange: Birds don't have souls, so it's not like it was going to Heaven anyway.


If there are no birds in heaven, then heaven sucks.

/have 2 cool, friendly pet birds
//minimal dance skills, though
 
2012-06-04 10:13:53 AM
FTFA: "We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

Is it 1977 already?

KISS = Knights In the Service of Satan
 
2012-06-04 10:14:16 AM
Rock out with your cockatoo out.
 
2012-06-04 10:14:57 AM

elvisaintdead: pseudowho: He makes that Jesus guy sounds like a real jerk.

well, there's no arguing he's holier-than-thou.


I should say, being against music because you think it's against God is just all kinds of messed up.
 
2012-06-04 10:15:18 AM

AbbeySomeone: FTFA: "I used to love rock and then Jesus came into my heart and took it completely away".


"I used to have fun, then Jesus came into my heart and took it completely away."

"I used to be a cool guy, then Jesus came into my heart and made me a controlling asshat."

/what a load of bull.
 
2012-06-04 10:16:08 AM
"I used to love rock my anal virginity and then Jesus Christ came inside me my heart and took it completely away,"
 
2012-06-04 10:18:05 AM
Anyone remember which bible verse states that it is a sin to teach a bird to dance to crappy music?
 
2012-06-04 10:19:26 AM
FTA: "I absolutely don't want to have anything to do with secular music anymore."

Oooh. Remind me to invite these people to my next gathering. They sound like loads of fun.
 
2012-06-04 10:20:58 AM

Bermuda59: Anyone remember which bible verse states that it is a sin to teach a bird to dance to crappy music?


well Jesus DID say Love won another.
meaning do whatever you want. as long as it's homophobic
 
2012-06-04 10:23:14 AM
Jesus: Holy shiat, you see that bird farking jam? That farking rocks!
Holy Spirit: Dude...
Father: Cockatoo. Lulz, cock.
 
2012-06-04 10:24:45 AM

flypusher713: Kraftwerk Orange: Birds don't have souls, so it's not like it was going to Heaven anyway.

If there are no birds in heaven, then heaven sucks.

/have 2 cool, friendly pet birds
//minimal dance skills, though


Religion = Superstition + $$$$ anyway. Nothing to worry about.
 
2012-06-04 10:25:27 AM

flypusher713: Kraftwerk Orange: Birds don't have souls, so it's not like it was going to Heaven anyway.

If there are no birds in heaven, then heaven sucks.

/have 2 cool, friendly pet birds
//minimal dance skills, though


The birds' skills? Or yours?
 
2012-06-04 10:26:39 AM
I made it through about 15 seconds of that godawful "I Whip My Hair" song before I had to close the video. I fully support the father's position on this.

/seriously, kid, when I was your age, I listened to cool songs like this
 
2012-06-04 10:26:46 AM
"We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

So, Satan's plan for world domination involves dancing birds and rock and roll?
 
2012-06-04 10:31:51 AM
Racists.
 
2012-06-04 10:32:17 AM
If there was a god, he'd never ask anyone to stop listening to Led Zeppelin...
 
2012-06-04 10:33:04 AM

NutWrench: "We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010," Gary Richie said. "We don't support the beat. We don't support that demonic sound and the repetition."

So, Satan's plan for world domination involves dancing birds and rock and roll?


I've got a song to accompany the cockatoo's dances: LINK
 
2012-06-04 10:37:10 AM
For fark's sake, it's Willow god-damn Smith. Another no talent, ass clown crotch fruit of that black guy who played Corky. I'd shun my kids too if they listened to that crap.
 
2012-06-04 10:38:55 AM
"We came to Christ, me and my wife did, back in 2010"


What an odd thing to have sex to. Was his picture on the ceiling?
 
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