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(BBC)   Turns out men cheat way more than women after all   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 75
    More: Obvious, World Service, sexually transmitted infections  
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12870 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jun 2012 at 3:18 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
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Archived thread
2012-06-04 03:32:11 AM  
7 votes:
Women are just better liars. And more likely to justify something as "not cheating".
2012-06-04 05:37:15 AM  
6 votes:
That women cheat to fulfill emotional needs is a load of bunk.

Women can decide in minutes whether or not she finds a guy farkable. If she finds a man attractive and wants to bone him she needs to fool herself into believing she's in love because she can't be honest with herself. If that deception means that she has to decide her emotional needs aren't being met in the relationship, so be it.

When women attack other women, the "go to" insult is to call her a slut or a whore. A lifetime of this causes sensitivity and self judgement. Enter the defense mechanisms, prompting a powerful rationalization that is far from rational, but part of the deception that protects her from calling herself a slut. It allows her to retain some level of self-acceptance. Hell, if she rationalizes hard enough, she can convince herself that she's the victim, and that she was weak. After all, her husband is the bad guy for not meeting her emotional needs.

Ask any guy in the friend zone. Has a woman ever thrown a leg over you because you met her emotional needs? Nope. Why? Because they separate love from lust as much as we men do.

The difference is that they must construct a bridge between the two out of 100 percent pure freeze dried bullshiat because she has been conditioned all her life that only sluts let their vagina do the thinking.

/been cheated on
//tried to work it out
///ditched her when she tried to blame it on me
2012-06-04 03:32:58 AM  
5 votes:
Tthe article should be about how men lie about how many women they've slept with and women lie about how few men they've slept with.
2012-06-04 03:30:37 AM  
5 votes:
We also have more reasons to cheat.
2012-06-04 02:50:18 AM  
5 votes:
Men cheat, women have affairs.

So if a woman thinks she falls in love, it's perfectly alright to commence the affair. Because she had emotional needs hat were being met.
2012-06-04 01:22:50 AM  
5 votes:

Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?


More than you would think. I have gay friends who hook up with a lot of supposedly straight, married men.
2012-06-04 07:56:08 AM  
4 votes:
So "overlapping relationships" is the new term for being a low down dirty dog? OK, I guess.

I feel anything is fair game as long as you are honest. If you tell someone that you are monogamous and that they are the only one and then you go sleep with someone else, you a liar. Period. If you don't want to sleep with only one person, then don't agree to be monogamous. Its just that simple.

If you find you want to sleep with someone else either attempt to renegotiate the terms of your relationship, or leave, but don't lie.

/just my two cents
2012-06-04 04:17:46 AM  
4 votes:
I think your views on cheating vary greatly depending on if you've cheated or been cheated on in the past. Belonging to the latter group I would never cheat just because I know the pain it can cause first hand. I'd sooner just end the relationship and then be free to fark whoever I want, guilt free.

It also goes both ways: I would rather a man tell me he's tired of my shiat and that he wants to move onto someone else (literally and figuratively) than find out later and feel like a total fool. Plus it means there's less chance of catching whatever skizzy souvenirs he might have picked up along the way.

I've also never been married, so ending a relationship usually doesn't involve financial seppuku or custody battles. Much easier that way.
2012-06-04 04:10:38 AM  
4 votes:
A women can be still living with you and be farking someone else without cheating.

This is because for the women, the relationship with you was already over. They were just waiting on a better offer before moving on.

Women don't like downtime. They will stay in an "over" relationship without telling the guy because it beats being alone for them.

emotional/monetary support etc.
2012-06-04 03:41:42 AM  
4 votes:
Why are married women so damn knowledgeable about online dating sites? Bring up EHarmony or OKCupid in conversation and you invariably end up with an earful about how the service sucks or the members are too shallow. How the fark is that not cheating?
2012-06-04 03:40:21 AM  
4 votes:
Cheaters are sociopathic mental midgets. I don't understand why, if you love someone, you would do something so disrespectful to them?
2012-06-04 03:35:13 AM  
4 votes:
Women will take a lie to the grave. Men are often too stupid not to brag or slip.
2012-06-04 12:23:59 AM  
4 votes:
Who are they cheating with? Each other?
2012-06-04 09:55:54 AM  
3 votes:
I've always wondered about people who get involved with someone who is married and then take up with them after they leave their spouse, or more likely get caught and get tossed out by their spouse.

You figure..they were cheating on someone else to be with you..what makes you think they won't cheat on you?
2012-06-04 09:13:22 AM  
3 votes:

doglover: I don't know why it's called cheating.


Because the spouse is being cheated out of the bargain that he/she made when they committed to one another. When you get married, you are pledging to be sexually available to the other person, and to forsake all others, to borrow a phrase.

Sexual frigidity is cheating, too. It's cheating you out of the sexual exclusivity that is the basis of the marriage, or whatever.

Women cheat at least as much as men. They also file for divorce most of the time, usually so they can take up with a man they believe to be of higher social value.

Men are by nature polygamous. Women are hypergamous -- they are ALWAYS looking to trade up, to pair with the highest value mate available to her.
2012-06-04 09:08:35 AM  
3 votes:

Julie Cochrane: James_Corn: totally dirty sluts

Smile when you say that, pahdner. ;-)


oh I was. hehe fond memories of that part. Now, not so much.

/has two awesome little girls at home. don't want to leave them. sex with wife is garbage or non existent, after the best sex in history was had early on. Patience has worn out with that. Backed up as all get out, and could pick up a woman at a bar easier. Do I stay and deal with it, stay and cheat, or go? Pain.


zappaisfrank:

Word. As I am fond of saying "A man who is fed well at home has no need for restaurants".


exactly. no man will cheat if he's getting what he needs at home. it's that simple. really.
2012-06-04 06:06:59 AM  
3 votes:
I think "cheating" is a much broader concept than just sex. I think cheating is any role or function that should be fulfilled by your partner, but you are doing it with someone else. Sex is one of those roles. But so is deep friendship, emotional openness, and even attention. One thing I've noticed about women is that many of them like to surround themselves with a small group of guy friends. Sometimes a large group, but still male friends. Even when they're in a relationship. They like the feeling of being wanted, the attention, having people they know they can get to do stuff for them, compliment them, and as fall-backs for dating or sex if the need arises. I think this is a form of cheating. Obviously just having friends of the opposite gender isn't cheating. But what I'm talking about goes beyond that. Having long conversations with the friendzone guys, flirting just enough to keep them thinking they have a shot so they stick around and keep giving her attention. That sort of thing IMO is a form of cheating. If I was in a relationship, I would definitely not be comfortable if my girlfriend had a bunch of guy friends she was that flirty with.

As far as the actual "study" I think this just shows women are more comfortable with lying. Women see the truth as secondary to "the effect". Take a look at the classic "Does this dress make me look fat?" question. A man would just answer with the truth. To men, the truth is a concrete thing. The dress either does or doesn't make her look fat. To a woman, the most important factor is the effect of what is said. "Yes" would make her feel bad, "No" would make her feel good, so "no" is the preferred answer. Not because it's true, but because it achieves the desired result. The truth is subservient to what they want to the outcome to be. You see this with all sorts of lies. Ask a woman out, and instead of her saying "I don't want to" she'll make up a story about why she "can't". It's a lie. But she doesn't want you to feel bad about the rejection (the effect), so a lie is better than the truth. Women invented the entire idea behind "little white lies". So in this study, the effect of telling the truth would be seeming like whores. Even if it's just admitting to themselves that they cheated, it still makes them feel bad. So a lie, even a lie to themselves, is always preferable to the truth.
2012-06-04 03:57:20 AM  
3 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: If you're not expected to be faithful, how can it be cheating?


I don't know why it's called cheating. There's no rules, and when there are rules it's called adultery.


It's that kind of ambiguity in daily English that lead me to study foriegn languages. And honestly, I'm just looking for a good woman. I don't actually like new girls all the time. It wears you down. Sometimes you do just want to cuddle and talk long talks that start "Remember when..."

But personally I've spent too much time around people who are creepin' and cheatin' and whatnot. Too much hassle for bad sex and stress. Much better to just be single.
2012-06-04 03:55:08 AM  
3 votes:
It's not cheating if you don't know her name.

Also, guys cheat to fulfill physical temptations/needs. Women cheat emotionally, which is way worse.
2012-06-04 03:28:33 AM  
3 votes:
It only follows that men cheat, since women are only interested in guys who are taken.
2012-06-04 10:11:47 AM  
2 votes:

James_Corn: sounds like a woman switched teams after being with you. That would suck. Did she let you watch or do it behind your back? At this point, for me, I'd just be thrilled knowing that my wife has any sort of pulse between her legs. If not for me, just for her own sake.


Ha, I like how you insult me then mention your wife won't f*ck you
2012-06-04 08:51:10 AM  
2 votes:
Well, if women didn't completely bait and switch men - totally dirty sluts until they have you hooked and married then it's all out the door. And yet they expect the man to just deal with it. Well that's farked up. Any woman who does this deserves to be cheated on and shouldn't be shocked when it happens. They all know perfectly well how men are. Do men want to live out their lives knowing there are no more hummers in their future? fark no they don't. If you dont want to get with your man, ladies, turn him loose or be fine with him getting it elsewhere. the end.
2012-06-04 07:28:15 AM  
2 votes:
The reason for the disparity is pretty simple: a man may have a mistress, the mistress has many men.
2012-06-04 06:33:36 AM  
2 votes:

Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?


No dear they cheat with prostitutes and yes those prostitutes do quite a few men each day.

I think its very well known that men want sex for the sake of just sex more than women. Which is why there are so many female prostitutes that service just men. Compared to the number of male prostitutes that service women.

Now women do like sex, but they also want more than just sex and they are more fussy. Hence they are less likely to cheat for just sex, but are probably just as likely if not more likely to cheat emotionally.

I will put it this way.

If a man went over seas on a holiday he would probably fark a number of women starting pretty soon after he got off the plan, but would come home and pretend he did nothing because these women had no emotional connection and were just farks.

The woman would probably, in the beginning, not have sex but form emotional relationships with a few men and narrow it down to one man who gives her more than a root. She would then break it off with her boyfriend back home to pursue the relationship with the man she met overseas.

This is of course not true for Fark women who like to fark just as much as men for farking sake and are probably the only women in the world to frequent male prostitutes.
2012-06-04 05:13:10 AM  
2 votes:

RoyBatty: fwiw, here's the obvious

Fark comment link

Think men are the unfaithful sex? A study shows WOMEN are the biggest cheats - they're just better at lying about it

By Maureen Rice

UPDATED: 09:10 EST, 7 September 2009

Are men or women more likely to cheat? While men have always had a worse reputation for being unfaithful, recent studies show that women are catching up fast - but we are a lot more likely to lie about it, and a lot less likely to get caught.

Simply put, it seems that women are better at having affairs than men.

The news that Farrah Fawcett had a secret affair for 11 years without telling a soul is a classic example of the way a woman cheats: discreetly, in secret, and while carrying on with the rest of her life as normal.

It has been met with hot denials by Ryan O'Neal, but - and I'm sorry to break it to you this way, Ryan - you'd be the last to know.

According to Dr David Holmes, a psychologist at Manchester Metropolitan University, women are having more affairs than ever - recent studies say the figure is around 20 per cent for men and a bit over 15 per cent for women - but they behave very differently from men when they cheat.

'The biggest difference is that women are much better at keeping their affairs secret,' he says. 'If you look at the studies into paternity, even conservative figures show that between eight and 15 per cent of children haven't been fathered by the man who thinks he's the biological parent.'


Mandatory blood tests, and less generous child support laws. It's the only way to be sure.

/no, biatch, you don't deserve child support
from anything with a dick
just because you lied to the dick
2012-06-04 03:46:00 AM  
2 votes:
fwiw, here's the obvious

Fark comment link

Think men are the unfaithful sex? A study shows WOMEN are the biggest cheats - they're just better at lying about it

By Maureen Rice

UPDATED: 09:10 EST, 7 September 2009

Are men or women more likely to cheat? While men have always had a worse reputation for being unfaithful, recent studies show that women are catching up fast - but we are a lot more likely to lie about it, and a lot less likely to get caught.

Simply put, it seems that women are better at having affairs than men.

The news that Farrah Fawcett had a secret affair for 11 years without telling a soul is a classic example of the way a woman cheats: discreetly, in secret, and while carrying on with the rest of her life as normal.

It has been met with hot denials by Ryan O'Neal, but - and I'm sorry to break it to you this way, Ryan - you'd be the last to know.

According to Dr David Holmes, a psychologist at Manchester Metropolitan University, women are having more affairs than ever - recent studies say the figure is around 20 per cent for men and a bit over 15 per cent for women - but they behave very differently from men when they cheat.

'The biggest difference is that women are much better at keeping their affairs secret,' he says. 'If you look at the studies into paternity, even conservative figures show that between eight and 15 per cent of children haven't been fathered by the man who thinks he's the biological parent.'
2012-06-04 03:37:47 AM  
2 votes:

Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: Women will take a lie to the grave. Men are often too stupid not to brag or slip.


Or too honorable to lie.
2012-06-04 03:36:55 AM  
2 votes:
I don't get that crap at all. Just leave them if it's that bad.
/been cheated on
2012-06-04 02:47:38 AM  
2 votes:

jaylectricity: It only makes sense. When a man cheats he's depositing his seed wherever and whenever. He leaves it with the woman, either in her or on her.

When a woman cheats, she invites another man's seed to live with her. Either he leaves it in her or he leaves it on her. She can wash it off, but it was still there.

Semen is the reason.


Reading that broke my brain.
2012-06-04 01:10:00 AM  
2 votes:
Turns out the article writer is a lying whore...
2012-06-04 12:27:41 AM  
2 votes:
So, it's just that one woman in every town, then?

Your mother warned you about her.
2012-06-04 12:56:34 PM  
1 votes:
The stats say men cheat more than woman only because many women think sucking a dick doesn't count as sex.
2012-06-04 11:03:19 AM  
1 votes:

zappaisfrank:

At one of my former places of employment, there was a woman who worked there who was a "swinger" and was after me big time! She was a major drunk also, and when she was bombed, she'd be all over me and most of the time it was right in front of her husband. Meeting her on the sly would have been one thing but involving the hubby in the proceedings was more than I was able to deal with. She creeped me out in other ways, too. She couldn't have kids and it farked her head up big time. Mostly it was the drunk thing, because when she was drunk she was nasty in other ways. Weird thing was that when she was sober, it was totally different and she never acknowledged the sexual overtures she would put on me when she was drunk. It was almost as if she didn't remember them!

In the years after I left that job, I heard that she tried to kill herself twice and eventually died from some sort of health issue, possibly related to drinking. I sooooo glad I stayed out of that mess.


yikes! yeah nice play staying out of that one. Can't remember who to credit it to, but one of my fav sayings is "you don't stick your d*ck in crazy"
2012-06-04 11:02:30 AM  
1 votes:
Single men cheat more than single woman. Married women cheat more than married men.
2012-06-04 11:00:35 AM  
1 votes:

smokeysmokerton: Once several years ago, I kissed a girlfriend at a bar. A pair of guys were hitting on us while we were waiting for our drinks, so we jokingly told them we were "together". We were drunk and couldn't resist when they asked us to prove it. Anyway, both of our husbands were at a nearby table. Mine saw the kiss(which was pretty hot) and was furious. Funny, but before I'd realized he'd seen us, I remember thinking how much of a turn on it would have been for him. Turns out, not so much.


Not too mention you did it for some stranger, no wonder.
2012-06-04 11:00:31 AM  
1 votes:

Lagaidh: harrydorcas: Now that should not be surprising. There is a study however that men are ok with women cheating as long as it is with another woman. You know, girl on girl action?

That's what I told my wife, back when we were just 18 and starting a relationship. I also told her if she ever cheated on me with a guy, I'd sure hate spending the rest of my life in prison.

In actuality, if she did seek the strange dong, I'd probably just wither up and die anyway...


I have never understood why guys get so pissed off and want to kill the guy their wives had an affair with. Is it really up to John Q. Strangedick to make sure their wife stays faithful? That's your job, pal.

If your wife is setting it out for another guy, she's the slut, not the guy taking advantage of the free ass.
2012-06-04 10:43:46 AM  
1 votes:
I had a very interesting thing that happened a few years ago. My neighbor, who was a very attractive African American woman (mentioned because I thought the cultural background was interesting in context of the story) with two nice young kids came over and knocked on our door and said without the least hint of embarrassment,"You'll probably see a police car at our house sometime over the next couple of days. Don't be alarmed, but my husband is a criminal. He is guilty of the crime of adultery and I have arranged for the police to explain to him that it is a crime and will not be tolerated." I have no idea how she pulled that one off but they were still together last I heard.

As for me, I've been married 28 years...never cheated, never really considered it. Probably have had no more than a couple reasonable chances...one was a college woman who worked for me and came into my office when we were working late and confessed her insatiable sluttiness to me and told me that she just couldn't refuse anything. She was quite the little cutie and everything, but not only am I pretty serious about the whole marriage vow thing...but I also go to church with her parents. Would make for an awkward communion.

Far as marriage and the old push pull goes, there are better times and there are worse, but that's how most things go and in the end it evens out. Don't get too discouraged if you hit a rough spot. Leave the kids with the grandparents, take your spouse to a nice all inclusive and hump and drink for a couple of days. Does wonders. The secret I can share is that if you don't look for trouble you are less likely to find it. It also helps to be frumpy.
2012-06-04 09:46:02 AM  
1 votes:
How do people even have time for an affair? Don't you have hobbies? besides being a whore of course.
2012-06-04 09:21:26 AM  
1 votes:

Marley'sGirl: I don't cheat on my husband for the simple reason that I married the man I actually want to be with.


This is what women actually believe.
2012-06-04 09:18:17 AM  
1 votes:

zappaisfrank: Women cheat because the men in their life aren't giving them what they need so they have to find it elsewhere..


What they need though is usually money.
2012-06-04 09:15:41 AM  
1 votes:

Phinn: doglover: I don't know why it's called cheating.

Because the spouse is being cheated out of the bargain that he/she made when they committed to one another. When you get married, you are pledging to be sexually available to the other person, and to forsake all others, to borrow a phrase.

Sexual frigidity is cheating, too. It's cheating you out of the sexual exclusivity that is the basis of the marriage, or whatever.


DING DING DING
2012-06-04 09:11:27 AM  
1 votes:
I don't cheat on my husband for the simple reason that I married the man I actually want to be with.
2012-06-04 08:47:51 AM  
1 votes:
Men cheat because they're pigs who can't keep their thingie in their pants.

Women cheat because the men in their life aren't giving them what they need so they have to find it elsewhere.

Synopsis-Men cheat because they're pigs and women cheat because men are pigs.
2012-06-04 08:35:56 AM  
1 votes:

phrenicmonkey: Nidiot: phrenicmonkey: Nidiot: phrenicmonkey: The Muthaship: phrenicmonkey: Also "just the tip".

A married woman asked for 'just the tip" in her attempt at an affair?

My bullsh*t meter just went into meltdown.

Those are my words. But she wanted everything short of "everything". I didn't believe her either. And I don't like blue balls.


WTF!?!

I'd steer well clear of that, I suspect she could make a bunny-boiler frightened.

And people say I'm crazy.

If you go anywhere near this woman in the future, then you are crazy.

Here's the kicker: she got more turned on by my being "noble". I'm definitely never going to be alone with that one. I think she regards me as a lost opportunity from 30 years ago. Thanks, Facebook!



That is not really a kicker, if she is hot, or used to generally getting her way with men, a refusal is an affront to her ego. Her self image is at stake. You are now considered a challenge, and must be conquered in order to maintain to herself that she has still "got it". She will probably up that dial to eleven.

I feel sorry for her husband.
2012-06-04 08:30:43 AM  
1 votes:
Until I met my wife, EVERY woman I dated WITHOUT EXCEPTION had someone else somewhere in the picture, either a boyfriend, live-in or husband. EVERY SINGLE ONE.

If I had a dollar for every time I've been the "back door man" for some woman stepping out on her man, I'd have enough money to qualify for "job creator" tax breaks".
2012-06-04 08:29:09 AM  
1 votes:
Make better decisions, have no cause for cheating. Problem solved.
2012-06-04 08:21:58 AM  
1 votes:

Nidiot: phrenicmonkey: Nidiot: phrenicmonkey: The Muthaship: phrenicmonkey: Also "just the tip".

A married woman asked for 'just the tip" in her attempt at an affair?

My bullsh*t meter just went into meltdown.

Those are my words. But she wanted everything short of "everything". I didn't believe her either. And I don't like blue balls.


WTF!?!

I'd steer well clear of that, I suspect she could make a bunny-boiler frightened.

And people say I'm crazy.

If you go anywhere near this woman in the future, then you are crazy.


Here's the kicker: she got more turned on by my being "noble". I'm definitely never going to be alone with that one. I think she regards me as a lost opportunity from 30 years ago. Thanks, Facebook!
2012-06-04 08:00:50 AM  
1 votes:

H31N0US: zez: Yep. I've never known a woman to leave a guy and then be alone, as soon as one relationship is over they are right with someone else.

BECAUSE THEY CAN, THAT'S WHY

Seriously, all a decent looking woman needs to do is smile.


I did. And have. And am.

And it's because I realized that the same thing was broken about my ex husband that was broken about my first ex husband---even though they were otherwise completely different. I had gone out and picked two guys who were as different as different could be--but the one thing they had in common was that they were broken in exactly the same relationship way that matched up exactly with...surprise, surprise...the relationship way in which I was broken.

Which was why that happened again. And with a bit of research, I found out that people with my kind of broken rarely get any better while in a relationship with a partner with the matching broken. And I found out that no matter how hard we try to look for partners without the matching broken, it's not enough--because they look for us. They're good at finding us, they actively seek us out, and they're very good at concealing what they are until we're already in the relationship. [sigh]

So, I've been alone for a couple of years, except for some nice guys in my friend zone who I occasionally sleep with, while I've been getting treatment for my side of those relationship issues and learning not to do my half of that bullshiat.

A lot of that has been learning not to take the bait when a broken guy comes around and tries to reel me in. Which I seem to have at least had some success in. What happens when they try one of the things I would have been a sure sucker for before, and I don't bite the line, is they throw a temper tantrum and flounce off. I consider this a Very Good Thing.

So now hopefully I'll get a chance to go out with some normal, decent guys who don't have the crazy. Maybe I'll find someone I "click" with, and vice versa.

But yes on the alone. Because I needed to get my shiat together.
2012-06-04 07:43:30 AM  
1 votes:

Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?


probably single women

/ric romero
2012-06-04 07:38:53 AM  
1 votes:

OregonVet: The reason for the disparity is pretty simple: a man may have a mistress, the mistress has many men.


The disparity is also that men do cheat with single women, so while he is cheating, she is not. While one might frown on the morals (or lack of) from a woman who would sleep with a married man, a man will often lie about his marital status, particularly if he is looking to cheat.
2012-06-04 07:12:44 AM  
1 votes:

Guest: Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?

No dear they cheat with prostitutes and yes those prostitutes do quite a few men each day.

I think its very well known that men want sex for the sake of just sex more than women. Which is why there are so many female prostitutes that service just men. Compared to the number of male prostitutes that service women.

Now women do like sex, but they also want more than just sex and they are more fussy. Hence they are less likely to cheat for just sex, but are probably just as likely if not more likely to cheat emotionally.

I will put it this way.

If a man went over seas on a holiday he would probably fark a number of women starting pretty soon after he got off the plan, but would come home and pretend he did nothing because these women had no emotional connection and were just farks.

The woman would probably, in the beginning, not have sex but form emotional relationships with a few men and narrow it down to one man who gives her more than a root. She would then break it off with her boyfriend back home to pursue the relationship with the man she met overseas.

This is of course not true for Fark women who like to fark just as much as men for farking sake and are probably the only women in the world to frequent male prostitutes.



I am in awe.

That is one of the smartest posts on the motivations of men vs women I have read. I am going to guess you are a woman since men don't normally get the concept of there possibly being anything more to sex than just a fark in the first place.

/Fark woman, but one of the ones who only wants sex if it is part of a relationship thanks, so not likely to visit a male prostitute ever
2012-06-04 07:00:18 AM  
1 votes:

foxyshadis: pedobearapproved: I equate your friend to someone that's just conceited and out of touch. Just like the pot head that thinks everyone smokes pot, including the cops that bust them.

I think most or maybe all people would experiment if you removed any social stigma and emotional attachment. Sex is sex, and sex is fun, but as long as we have a stigma, most people have plenty of what satisfies their base needs all around without having to go experiment in unorthodox holes. That's not the same as saying everyone's a little bi, because a straight man will still try to go for the one girl in the corner of the gay bar, even if she's a butch dyke, and if she rejects him he'd go for the girliest drag queen. It takes a total disconnect from the opposite sex to turn a straight man bi/gay, though you might be able to get him drunk enough to make him not know the difference.

The temporary loss of the stigma might be what's causing the rise in bi-curious young women, who become strictly straight after university when the stigma returns. Or maybe growing up with the internet just makes people freaks, I don't know.


What do a bi-girl and a bi-guy have in common? at the end of the day they both end up with dudes.

Bi experimentation for females in the West has always been more socially acceptable. Behind closed doors its probably at the same rate as male, but males just say "I'm straight," rather than "I'm bi." As I recall the extreme social stigma was an explanation of the high HIV infection rate among "straight" african-american males. I don't think, in this day and age, the stigma is preventing anyone from fooling around with whoever they want to. Which for the most part isn't someone of the same sex, alcohol or not. Getting admission to what they've done is the trick.
2012-06-04 06:32:20 AM  
1 votes:

AbbeySomeone: Well yeah, he's been pretty out of touch since he died.
F*ck you.


ever heard the whole thing about not sharing personal stories on the internet if you can't take them being criticized?

memedepot.com
2012-06-04 06:28:21 AM  
1 votes:

taurusowner: I think "cheating" is a much broader concept than just sex. I think cheating is any role or function that should be fulfilled by your partner, but you are doing it with someone else. Sex is one of those roles. But so is deep friendship, emotional openness, and even attention. One thing I've noticed about women is that many of them like to surround themselves with a small group of guy friends. Sometimes a large group, but still male friends. Even when they're in a relationship. They like the feeling of being wanted, the attention, having people they know they can get to do stuff for them, compliment them, and as fall-backs for dating or sex if the need arises. I think this is a form of cheating. Obviously just having friends of the opposite gender isn't cheating. But what I'm talking about goes beyond that. Having long conversations with the friendzone guys, flirting just enough to keep them thinking they have a shot so they stick around and keep giving her attention....



Seriously that sounds like the worst sort of woman in the world, but only the really good looking girls get away with that. I have seen the type and I almost feel sorry for the guys who orbit them, until I realise that the guys are the one torturing themselves and are fully able to go and find some better girl who is perhaps less "hot" if only they could get the blood flowing back away from their genitals and into their brains for a minute.
2012-06-04 06:22:24 AM  
1 votes:
A man may or may not be honorable, but in general, men are taught that honor and integrity are key components of manhood. The connotation of the phrase"be a man" (or "man up") illustrates this.

A woman also may or may not be honorable, but "be a woman" carries a completely different connotation, unrelated to integrity. I'm convinced that women cheat just as much, or more, but they aren't generally taught to have the same compass that men are, and so they see getting away with infidelity as something they are somewhat more entitled to.

This is, of course, a broad generalization.
2012-06-04 06:17:53 AM  
1 votes:

foxyshadis:
I think most or maybe all people would experiment if you removed any social stigma and emotional attachment. Sex is sex, and sex is fun, but as long as we have a stigma, most people have plenty of what satisfies their base needs all around without having to go experiment in unorthodox holes. That's not the same as saying everyone's a little bi, because a straight man will still try to go for the one girl in the corner of the gay bar, even if she's a butch dyke, and if she rejects him he'd go for the girliest drag queen. It takes a total disconnect from the opposite sex to turn a straight man bi/gay, though you might be able to get him drunk enough to make him not know the difference.

The temporary loss of the stigma might be what's causing the rise in bi-curious young women, who become strictly straight after university when the stigma returns. Or maybe growing up with the internet just makes people freaks, I don't know.


My personal theory is that sexuality lies on a continuum, rather than something as simplistic and a choice between hetero, homo or bi.

Some people would be so far along the line of being heterosexual that there is not enough alcohol in the world that would make them want to even experiment with someone of the same sex. Likewise some homosexuals would possibly be at the other end of the spectrum in that they cannot ever find any attraction to members of the opposite sex, ever. In the middle would be the bi-sexual people who have no concerns regarding the gender of their object of desire.

But you would not know where the average person would lie along the line. So perhaps an individual is somewhere closer to being bi and a few drinks is enough to loosen inhibitions enough to allow them to experiment a little. But perhaps they would rather drink poison than do so. It strikes me as a little odd to assume that because the occasional outwardly heterosexual person shows a little bi-curiosity, that therefore all heterosexuals are just a few drinks and a removal of stigma away from doing the same.
2012-06-04 06:09:21 AM  
1 votes:
How did I get sucked into reading that whole retarded post?
2012-06-04 06:03:13 AM  
1 votes:

zez: Yep. I've never known a woman to leave a guy and then be alone, as soon as one relationship is over they are right with someone else.


BECAUSE THEY CAN, THAT'S WHY

Seriously, all a decent looking woman needs to do is smile.
2012-06-04 05:57:05 AM  
1 votes:

steamingpile: miss diminutive: steamingpile: Just a bit awkward.

Damn, I wasn't even there and I feel awkward.

What's really strange is that the women made it awkward by using slurs, the guys didn't give a shiat other than busting his balls, figuratively of course...

When one of them said "how can she stay with a guy who sucked dick" it was time to leave, from what I heard it went downhill from there. The guy ended up remarrying but the lady is still single, she can't seem to have a normal relationship and I keep telling her its because she lets her friends judge her too harshly. She needs new friends.


It might not be her friends, it is simply much harder for a woman to find a partner once she is no longer in her twenties than it is for a man. Which is why some women do the thing of staying in a relationship they have declared "dead" until such time as they have found a new man to move onto. Not sure how much future there was in the relationship with a guy who was also into guys anyway, he sounds like the one with the issues that needed resolving.
2012-06-04 05:54:02 AM  
1 votes:

PillsHere: nickerj1: Also, guys cheat to fulfill physical temptations/needs. Women cheat emotionally, which is way worse.

I'd have to disagree with you there. Physical cheating can lead to diseases and pregnancy - both are way worse than someone's hurt feelings. But you're right in the sense that generally men cheat to fulfill physical needs and women cheat to fulfill emotional needs. It's funny how we can't seem to fulfill each other's needs :P.


One thing is pretty constant: Women cheating on men with women or men cheating on women with men nearly always turns out very badly, despite the obvious parallels in needs. It's almost like all people are all deranged, damaged little savages all trying to believe that they deserve more than they have. Well, maybe not the monks that have sworn off everything.

pedobearapproved: I equate your friend to someone that's just conceited and out of touch. Just like the pot head that thinks everyone smokes pot, including the cops that bust them.


I think most or maybe all people would experiment if you removed any social stigma and emotional attachment. Sex is sex, and sex is fun, but as long as we have a stigma, most people have plenty of what satisfies their base needs all around without having to go experiment in unorthodox holes. That's not the same as saying everyone's a little bi, because a straight man will still try to go for the one girl in the corner of the gay bar, even if she's a butch dyke, and if she rejects him he'd go for the girliest drag queen. It takes a total disconnect from the opposite sex to turn a straight man bi/gay, though you might be able to get him drunk enough to make him not know the difference.

The temporary loss of the stigma might be what's causing the rise in bi-curious young women, who become strictly straight after university when the stigma returns. Or maybe growing up with the internet just makes people freaks, I don't know.

zzrhardy: Just watch out for the side effects: lots of disposable income and international travel.


I probably wouldn't be traveling internationally or nearly as widely if I wasn't with someone. Sometimes you need that nudge. Knowing me, I'd have probably become addicted to some stupid online thing.

/No, no, I can stop Farking any time I like, no addiction there guvn'r
zez
2012-06-04 05:38:05 AM  
1 votes:

zzrhardy: A women can be still living with you and be farking someone else without cheating.

This is because for the women, the relationship with you was already over. They were just waiting on a better offer before moving on.

Women don't like downtime. They will stay in an "over" relationship without telling the guy because it beats being alone for them.

emotional/monetary support etc.


Yep. I've never known a woman to leave a guy and then be alone, as soon as one relationship is over they are right with someone else.
2012-06-04 05:22:36 AM  
1 votes:

ExperianScaresCthulhu: Mandatory blood tests, and less generous child support laws. It's the only way to be sure.


It's kind of hard to change things. But it is as easy as hell to opt out.

Just watch out for the side effects: lots of disposable income and international travel.
2012-06-04 04:29:48 AM  
1 votes:

miss diminutive: steamingpile: Just a bit awkward.

Damn, I wasn't even there and I feel awkward.


What's really strange is that the women made it awkward by using slurs, the guys didn't give a shiat other than busting his balls, figuratively of course...

When one of them said "how can she stay with a guy who sucked dick" it was time to leave, from what I heard it went downhill from there. The guy ended up remarrying but the lady is still single, she can't seem to have a normal relationship and I keep telling her its because she lets her friends judge her too harshly. She needs new friends.
2012-06-04 04:24:17 AM  
1 votes:

zzrhardy: It only follows that men cheat, since women are only interested in guys who are taken.


Truth. But how do they know? Must be witchcraft.

My last relationship was 10 years in the dying, and when it finally played out, I figured that all of those girls who had been flirting with/throwing themselves at me were now fair game. Nope!
2012-06-04 03:54:50 AM  
1 votes:

coco ebert: Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?

More than you would think. I have gay friends who hook up with a lot of supposedly straight, married men.



I bet the number of gay men who fib about sleeping with straight, married men is greater than the number that actually do so. For some reason people think gay men are beacons of truth when talking about sex, since, what have they got to hide? But gay men exagerrate as much as straight men, certainly.

Instead of their wife being Morgan Fairchild, they're off sleeping with dozens of straight, married men.
2012-06-04 03:48:21 AM  
1 votes:

natawheee: AverageAmericanGuy:
What's love got to do with it?

So they don't love you to begin with? Makes sense. Then you slipped and fell in a pile of cheating piece of shiat.


What's love but a secondhand emotion?
2012-06-04 03:43:16 AM  
1 votes:

natawheee: Cheaters are sociopathic mental midgets. I don't understand why, if you love someone, you would do something so disrespectful to them?


What's love got to do with it?
2012-06-04 03:39:42 AM  
1 votes:

Darth_Lukecash: Men cheat, women have affairs.

So if a woman thinks she falls in love, it's perfectly alright to commence the affair. Because she had emotional needs hat were being met.


You've obviously met my ex.
2012-06-04 03:39:03 AM  
1 votes:
Women don't fart either.
2012-06-04 03:32:42 AM  
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: I had a month business trip that just ended yesterday and had at least 2 chances to cheat, but I declined both.

I don't think it's out of any particular sense of honor or fidelity, because it's something I've taken part in a handful of times in the years since I got married. Rather, I just didn't want to deal with the repercussions, and in this day and age of Facebook and social media, word getting out that I'm catting around is a very high risk.

One was a friend of a friend who wanted some revenge sex because her boyfriend just revealed he was cheating on her. The other was a very close friend who I used to sleep with on occasion in the past. The second one was a bit more tempting, but she's on the verge of getting engaged to a nice guy, so I turned her down.

But on the whole, it's not so much dedication to my vows that keeps me in line so much as lack of opportunity.


he says on fark
2012-06-04 03:24:20 AM  
1 votes:
I had a month business trip that just ended yesterday and had at least 2 chances to cheat, but I declined both.

I don't think it's out of any particular sense of honor or fidelity, because it's something I've taken part in a handful of times in the years since I got married. Rather, I just didn't want to deal with the repercussions, and in this day and age of Facebook and social media, word getting out that I'm catting around is a very high risk.

One was a friend of a friend who wanted some revenge sex because her boyfriend just revealed he was cheating on her. The other was a very close friend who I used to sleep with on occasion in the past. The second one was a bit more tempting, but she's on the verge of getting engaged to a nice guy, so I turned her down.

But on the whole, it's not so much dedication to my vows that keeps me in line so much as lack of opportunity.
2012-06-04 02:51:59 AM  
1 votes:

LordZorch: Turns out the article writer is a lying whore...


Or,to put it more delicately,relied on a woefully flawed research methodology-which,in turn,renders these 'findings' virtually useless.
2012-06-04 02:13:43 AM  
1 votes:

dopeydwarf: That always amazes me. I would think it would be a lot easier just to be honest with yourself. Even though I'm sure it would be challenging, it seems it would be much more difficult to juggle a fake life along with the person you really want to be.


They probably subscribe to the "it's not gay unless balls touch" school of closetry.
2012-06-04 01:41:58 AM  
1 votes:

coco ebert: Ambivalence: Who are they cheating with? Each other?

More than you would think. I have gay friends who hook up with a lot of supposedly straight, married men.


That always amazes me. I would think it would be a lot easier just to be honest with yourself. Even though I'm sure it would be challenging, it seems it would be much more difficult to juggle a fake life along with the person you really want to be.
2012-06-04 01:36:34 AM  
1 votes:
It only makes sense. When a man cheats he's depositing his seed wherever and whenever. He leaves it with the woman, either in her or on her.

When a woman cheats, she invites another man's seed to live with her. Either he leaves it in her or he leaves it on her. She can wash it off, but it was still there.

Semen is the reason.
 
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