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(Shutterstock)   If you ever did win the lottery, would you give it away or surprise people with it in fun ways?   ( divider line
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4319 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Jun 2012 at 5:37 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-06-02 11:03:25 PM  
4 votes:
Tell no one. Hire the best people to help me handle that amount of money. Hook up my family on the low down. Travel the planet.
2012-06-03 05:48:53 AM  
3 votes:
Tell no-one. Bank it. Retire and live modestly off the interest. another country.
2012-06-02 11:04:28 PM  
3 votes:
Maybe a little. But that's how lottery winners go broke, so I wouldn't be paying off people's houses, I would be buying them ice cream. I would take the lump sum, throw it in a high yield account and use only the interest. Boring and responsible.
2012-06-03 01:25:49 AM  
2 votes:
two chicks at the same time.
2012-06-03 01:04:43 AM  
2 votes:

Kingly Weevil: atlfarkette: Tell no one. Hire the best people to help me handle that amount of money. Hook up my family on the low down. Travel the planet.

Travel the planet would come after I bought a smallish house, a newish car, and went back to school for 3-5 masters and/or doctoral degrees.

Extensive travel and life experience is much more valuable than book learning.
2012-06-03 12:50:38 PM  
1 vote:
Team Nemesis: 1) Buy about two thousand acres of land in Montana.
2) Build a 4 bed/bath log cabin.
3) Pay off my debt/parents debt
4) Pay a hooker to move in with me.
5) Never get marrried.
6) Die screaming get off my lawn you young whipper snappers.

Just make sure whatever state you are in(whether its actually MT or that is just a 1st flyover state to pop into your mind answer) doesn't recognise common law marriage, otherwise you will find yourself "married" to said hooker that is living with you with no prenup
2012-06-03 10:51:17 AM  
1 vote:
I'd buy new computers for the household, though I'd spend a lot more on the production machines for our web comic than the non-production ones. Depending on how much the lottery is, and how much is left, I'd either put a down on a large house, or buy the house outright. Then I'd buy a new vehicle outright. I'd invest the rest.
2012-06-03 09:20:51 AM  
1 vote:

spentmiles: I'd get my penis enlarged, over and over again.

You already did when you acquired the money.
2012-06-03 07:32:13 AM  
1 vote:
I'd buy homes in rich Republican neighborhoods, the snootier the better. Then move a poor family into that home. The bigger the family the better, and of course minorities preferred.

The inner city black mom with 9 kids, or the huge Asian family just off the boat, or of course the extended family of Mexican migrant workers.

Just for the lulz

/of course I'd also help support each family and set up scholarships for the kids
2012-06-03 07:13:25 AM  
1 vote:
Things you must do right away upon winning the lottery:

- Change your phone number(s) IMMEDIATELY
- Find a competent financial advisor (and lawyer if necessary)
- Inform the lottery folks NOT to release any more info about you than they legally must
- KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT about winning
- Pay your bills off first
- Create a budget and STICK TO IT

And maybe the most important thing of all:
- Learn how to say NO without feeling guilty
2012-06-03 07:06:37 AM  
1 vote:
I would arrange yearly payouts to myself that gradually increased in size. Starting off at about half my current income and calculated to last my lifetime.

This way I would have something to look forward to. Each year I could decide to spend, save or give. I could learn from earlier years mistakes.
2012-06-03 05:52:49 AM  
1 vote:
Sailboat for me, something in the 45" range. Condo in Kauai. Mom retired to Phoenix. New car for my brother. No forwarding address for the rest.
2012-06-03 02:02:40 AM  
1 vote:
Give it away? that doesn't even make f*cking sense.
2012-06-03 01:08:22 AM  
1 vote:
This is the thing about winning the lottery:

1. Everybody in town will know about your recent fortune
2. People will come out of the woodwork
3. People you thought were friends will suddenly start acting differently
4. Your bank may find ways of pilfering your money
5. Or maybe your money just disappears because you put it in an offshore account
6. No matter what you do your family starts to hate you
6a. Because you helped your cousin but not your sister, or some other random family member
6b. Because suddenly "You've changed" which translates to, "I thought you were gonna take us out to eat more often and pay our mortgage."
2012-06-03 12:45:44 AM  
1 vote:
I'd make sure sure my mom was well taken care of. Everyone else can kiss my ass.
2012-06-02 11:42:15 PM  
1 vote:
I'd sponsor a couple liters.
2012-06-02 11:29:56 PM  
1 vote:
I'd give it away to strippers, one dollar coin at a time.

/and find out about that champagne room thing........
2012-06-02 11:24:20 PM  
1 vote:
I'd buy a major sports team and shut it down.
2012-06-02 11:24:15 PM  
1 vote:
Yes, but the five dollars from the scratch-off probably wouldn't go all that far.
2012-06-02 11:03:22 PM  
1 vote:
I know a couple people I'd love to walk up and give a $10,000 check to
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