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(AZ Family)   Woman busted for trying to trade a Happy Ending for a Happy Meal (w/ mugshot that will make you Grimace)   (azfamily.com) divider line 109
    More: Interesting, Mcdonald, child prostitution  
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18026 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 May 2012 at 12:04 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



109 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-05-31 12:07:04 AM
mitchieville.com
Obligatory.
 
2012-05-31 12:07:49 AM
The "happy ending" is that she ceased and desisted.
 
2012-05-31 12:09:52 AM
Faelyn.
Mom was prophetic.
 
2012-05-31 12:10:19 AM
It's a good time
for the great taste
 
2012-05-31 12:10:35 AM
Maybe she has he sexiest hand ever???
 
2012-05-31 12:12:20 AM
She looks like she's had a few big macs in her time. Maybe even a whopper or two.
 
2012-05-31 12:12:38 AM
You gotta keep your eyes on your fries when you're in the hamburger patch.

/signed/
Iam Hungry
Vice President of Snacking
 
2012-05-31 12:13:20 AM
Arizona tag desperately needed.
 
2012-05-31 12:13:45 AM
Have it your weigh.
 
2012-05-31 12:13:56 AM
Poor girls must have been REALLY hungry!
 
2012-05-31 12:14:20 AM
Triple bagger.

Extra bag in case the first bag falls off.

Third bag is for a cheeseburger and a large fries.
 
2012-05-31 12:15:07 AM
Faelyn Ritz.
Now there's a cracker that wont work.
 
2012-05-31 12:15:35 AM
adland.tv

/seems appropriate
 
2012-05-31 12:16:52 AM
Meh ... I've farked worse.
 
2012-05-31 12:17:39 AM
2.bp.blogspot.com
Go Large!


/for bbbj
 
2012-05-31 12:18:43 AM
She obviously wasn't good enough for Wendy's. Everybody knows McDs fries suck.
 
2012-05-31 12:18:48 AM
Well, this is a tough one. On the one hand, she's not, "OMG set it on fire!" unattractive. But at the same time, she's not "brag to your friends about it" attractive by a long shot. The price is cheap... it all comes down to her skizziles. How happy is the ending?
 
2012-05-31 12:20:00 AM
Hell, I expected worse. I wouldn't give her a full meal, but I would give her a cheeseburger from the dollar menu for a beej if I was hard up.
 
2012-05-31 12:20:57 AM
If you want some cheap prostitute sex just use your wits,
Buy a Happy Meal for Ritz!
 
2012-05-31 12:21:28 AM
More special sauce, please.
 
2012-05-31 12:22:48 AM
What did they think was gonna happen when they took the toys out of happy meals?
 
2012-05-31 12:24:32 AM
So, she charges $200/hr, but will settle for "food" from McD's? Either this McD's was in Tokyo or she's BS'ing about the $200/hr.

In either case, it's way too much.
 
2012-05-31 12:27:05 AM
FTFA: Ritz also revealed that she has been prostituting since the age of 15, and charges $200 an hour for her services.


Haven't had a happy meal lately, but isn't that a little pricey?
 
2012-05-31 12:28:20 AM
Kudos to subby for not trying to trick us with another "hottie" headline.
 
2012-05-31 12:29:24 AM
Freaking sad...

And why is it once a dude gets on the internet, he develops such high farking standards? Don't lie. You'd hit it.
 
2012-05-31 12:30:14 AM

Nishu: Freaking sad...

And why is it once a dude gets on the internet, he develops such high farking standards? Don't lie. You'd hit it.


For the price of a happy meal? Sure.
For $200 an hour? No.
 
TWX
2012-05-31 12:31:49 AM

DenisVengeance: Arizona tag desperately needed.


Eh, I'd bet that this isn't all that uncommon in a lot of places. She was about two miles away from the university and about three miles away from a nightlife hotspot, Mill Avenue. The neighborhood is mixed- there's a very large hotel, some weird high density, low rent apartments, some suburban, a shopping center with a drug store, an auto parts store, a massage parlor, and other non-high-class businesses in it. It's on a major bus route and there's also a lot of vehicle traffic that commutes through there to get to a couple of major freeways.

My guess is that the McDonalds part is the part of the story she and the johns got straight so that if they got busted they might not see actual charges. Unfortunately for her, her partner in hooking is a young minor and admitting that she would take a cut of the minor's revenue she just admitted to pimping a child. Had she kept her mouth shut then she probably wouldn't have seen charges, as it would be very hard to argue prostitution when a lot of women effective trade food for sex, albeit less openly.
 
2012-05-31 12:32:42 AM
i138.photobucket.com
i138.photobucket.com

It took a couple minutes, but there it is!
 
2012-05-31 12:32:47 AM

Mr. Potatoass: Faelyn.
Mom was prophetic.


i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-31 12:33:13 AM
For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real
 
2012-05-31 12:34:44 AM

Nishu: Freaking sad...

And why is it once a dude gets on the internet, he develops such high farking standards? Don't lie. You'd hit it.


She's like a fat Linda Blaire with a longer 5 head. We get them for free in these parts.
 
2012-05-31 12:34:50 AM

Nishu: Freaking sad...

And why is it once a dude gets on the internet, he develops such high farking standards? Don't lie. You'd hit it.


Yes, I'd hit it. Repeatedly. With a shovel.
 
2012-05-31 12:37:00 AM
In her defense, most of her jobs probably only take three minutes, so $200/hour might be technically accurate.
 
2012-05-31 12:38:04 AM

StinkyFiddlewinks: For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real


I cam here to say this. I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?
 
2012-05-31 12:39:34 AM

dj_bigbird: So, she charges $200/hr, but will settle for "food" from McD's? Either this McD's was in Tokyo or she's BS'ing about the $200/hr.

In either case, it's way too much.


Agreed.
 
2012-05-31 12:43:55 AM

Nishu:

And why is it once a dude gets on the internet, he develops such high farking standards?


It was travelling to Asia that did this to me, not getting on the internet.
 
2012-05-31 12:45:14 AM

AbbeySomeone: StinkyFiddlewinks: For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real

I cam here to say this. I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?


Well if I named my daughter Faelyn I guess that would mean I got what I was asking for
 
2012-05-31 12:48:08 AM

Honest Bender: Well, this is a tough one. On the one hand, she's not, "OMG set it on fire!" unattractive. But at the same time, she's not "brag to your friends about it" attractive by a long shot. The price is cheap... it all comes down to her skizziles. How happy is the ending?


Skizziles like an Arby's roast beef sandwich. Still feeling hungry?
 
2012-05-31 12:49:01 AM
As is typical, headline promises and fails to deliver.

/expecting cringeworthy, got someone not uncute
 
2012-05-31 12:50:41 AM
I love that after this all went down, and she was going to go to jail for prostitution she "added" that she was pimping the 14 year old as well. Strong move, lady.
 
2012-05-31 12:53:23 AM
Really? Not one of you feel just a bit sorry for the poor young girls that were selling themselves for food?


That was really hard to type while laughing
 
2012-05-31 12:54:05 AM

AbbeySomeone: I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?


I guess that would depend on what my cut of the action was.
 
2012-05-31 12:55:28 AM

AbbeySomeone: StinkyFiddlewinks: For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real

I cam here to say this. I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?


You must be new here.
 
2012-05-31 12:59:56 AM

Aloy: [i138.photobucket.com image 186x271]


i50.tinypic.com
 
2012-05-31 01:02:26 AM

AbbeySomeone: StinkyFiddlewinks: For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real

I cam here to say this. I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?


I don't care when you came, a desk is a deal so pay up. I'm hungry and I want my Happy Meal
 
2012-05-31 01:03:10 AM
Why do cops do this?

Why couldnt they just get her agree to money and save the sensationalistic humiliation of this poor girl's willingness to trade for food.

what do they gain from that?
 
2012-05-31 01:03:20 AM
Having sex for a meal sounds more like a legit date than prostitution, at least to me. It's a miracle more women aren't busted for this immoral, apparently illegal behaviour everyday!
 
2012-05-31 01:03:49 AM
Maybe if she lost 50lbs (it would require stop eating micky D's or in her case stop eating all together).

/those knee's arn't shape, they fat
 
2012-05-31 01:03:52 AM

Gunny Highway: AbbeySomeone: StinkyFiddlewinks: For a Happy Meal? A worthy trade.
/off to hell

Sad, I hope she gets turned around and has her head put straight
/driving the bus

Seriously, it's sad.
/for real

I cam here to say this. I'm sure most of you that pity her and the life she has had to put her in this situation don't want to admit that you have a heart or a conscious. What if it were your sister or daughter?

I don't care when you came, a desk is a deal so pay up. I'm hungry and I want my Happy Meal


A desk is a deal. Now you all know the truth.

/god damn it
 
2012-05-31 01:04:05 AM
At least we know what Grimace looks like without makeup.
 
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