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(Fark)   Annoying co-worker has a habit of leaving his computer unlocked. I'm thinking of adding "Smoke weed everyday" to his signature block. What is your best office prank?   (fark.com) divider line 460
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8477 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 May 2012 at 6:25 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-30 06:36:39 PM  
We had a new nurse come to work for us, so we decided to have some fun with her.

We put a co-worker in a body bag, and put him in the back of the ambulance. We told her she would have to ride in the back while we did the body transport. Pulled to the drive way to turn out, the coworker shot up and grabbed her with his hand.

I don't think I've ever seen someone run that fast out the back of an ambulance. We caught her a hundred or so feet away crying.
 
2012-05-30 06:36:51 PM  
Install the blue screen of death screen saver.
 
2012-05-30 06:37:03 PM  
I freaked out my boss with Fake delete once. That's all.
 
2012-05-30 06:37:04 PM  
Lots of tightasses here. Lighten up, Francis.
 
2012-05-30 06:37:07 PM  

One Bad Apple: Change his start up page to NAMbLA ?


North American Marlon Brando Look Alikes?
 
2012-05-30 06:37:23 PM  
A simple one... if they use Microsoft Word a lot, go into their autocorrect settings, and set it so when they type in the word "the" is autocorrects to a curse word or something like that.
 
2012-05-30 06:37:56 PM  

Gig103: I swapped the C and V keys on someone's keyboard. You'd think that a software engineer would be a touch typist, but he couldn't figure out why his copies were pasting.

He called IT, and then went to the restroom. I swapped them back. He was a whiny biatch and went to our manager about it after being embarrassed.


Yeah, that's the one we used to do. Plus, switch other keys just for goofs.
 
2012-05-30 06:38:53 PM  
Someone modified my sig to say Olympic Hopeful. I don't think I caught on right away.
 
2012-05-30 06:39:02 PM  
Reposted from a previous prank thread.

A bunch of years ago we had a very sheltered sweet young thing (Jen) working as our receptionist. My friend (Curt) and I walked over to Mini Mart and grabbed a couple of packets of pureed onions from the condiment rack. When we got back to the shop we dumped the onion goo into a condom and dropped it outside the front door. We went back in and got back to work. Later I went out for a smoke break and when I came back in I made big fuss about the nasty thing someone had left near our door. Jen and Curt come out and see it laying there and she starts going off about how disgusting it is. While she is in mid rant Curt reaches down, picks it up, and sucks all the onion goo out of it. I will never forget the look on her face.
 
2012-05-30 06:39:18 PM  
i26.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-30 06:39:52 PM  

BronyMedic: We had a new nurse come to work for us, so we decided to have some fun with her.

We put a co-worker in a body bag, and put him in the back of the ambulance. We told her she would have to ride in the back while we did the body transport. Pulled to the drive way to turn out, the coworker shot up and grabbed her with his hand.

I don't think I've ever seen someone run that fast out the back of an ambulance. We caught her a hundred or so feet away crying.



That's messed up, and you guys should be ashamed.

/Who am I kidding?!
//Wish I had been there.
 
2012-05-30 06:39:58 PM  
I was always partial to the BSOD screensaver myself
 
2012-05-30 06:39:59 PM  
ANY prank that could get to the hands of management, or worse, outside the company (as an email sig would) are COMPLETELY wrong and will likely get him, or hopefully you, fired. Good pranks are things that will BRIEFLY mess with his ability to work, or screw with his head. Don't fill his cubicle up with styrofoam; that'll take hours to clean up. Do shrink-wrap it, so it takes him five minutes to get into his desk while people snap pictures. If your prank costs the company too much productivity, the management won't be too happy with you.

An old favorite of mine: Buy a mouse or keyboard of the identical make/model as his, and embed it in either concrete, or a Jello mold. Replace his mouse/keyboard with yours, putting his originals in a drawer where they can quickly be found and used after yours are pitched. Reversing the monitor, changing language settings, etc. are OK pranks, but make sure you're on hand to put it right once you've had your fun; don't waste IT resources on correcting it. The desktop screenshot others have suggested is also easily reversible and harmless, so it's not too bad. If your company doesn't monitor personal Internet use (such that he could get in trouble for visiting prohibited websites), leave his browser open and pointing to an embarrassing (but SFW!!) website. Don't use stuff like porn, or anything political/racist/homophobic, etc. Go more for things like girls' cartoons, ballet schools, a sports team he hates...

You can also do things like subscribe him to newsletters to silly stuff (the same kind of subject matter as described above), or create an alias to his email address and use it to list him on Craigslist with some sort of goofy thing he has for sale.
 
2012-05-30 06:40:11 PM  

The_Sponge: CSB:

A coworker left his computer unlocked this morning, so I used it to send out an email asking a few people if we would like to join his Justin Bieber fan page on Facebook.


That's downright hateful.
 
2012-05-30 06:40:44 PM  
Reset his Windows startup sound to the orgasm in "When Harry Met Sally." Crank the volume to max, and turn the computer off before you leave for the night. Make sure to be in the first the next day. Hilarity ensures. Bonus points for blocking access to volume controls.


/Not mine.
 
2012-05-30 06:40:51 PM  
My coworkers made a habit of using my flavored coffee creamers that i kept in the main kitchen refrig, even when i put a sticky note on it asking them to respect my property. It continued, so i just emptied a cup of salt into a half empty carton and left it there for all the thieves to enjoy. I checked it a couple days later and it was half gone. I checked it a week later and the level had not moved. Justice is a salt lick.
coloradoguy.com
 
2012-05-30 06:41:00 PM  
Going to stick up for Subby. I work in finance, which means this: If you leave your computer unlocked, someone can easily steal a client's identity. It's to the point were we can't even have cell phones out because people were taking pictures of accounts.

Just imagine how you would feel if your account information was stolen because some idiot couldn't hit Ctrl Alt Delete. I had a guy when I worked at The Vanguard Group that couldn't get that point through his head, even though we had institutional accounts up that were worth billions. Management knew about it and wouldn't do a thing. I would have loved for him to have gotten canned. He put millions of dollars at risk every time his dumb ass forgot something so simple.
 
2012-05-30 06:41:08 PM  
Many moons ago, when the internet was young I worked in an office with an older lady who never locked her computer and always left her email program running. We signed her up to a BDSM listserv. She couldn't figure out how to unsubscribe and was too embarrassed to ask the admins for help.

Good times.

But the screenshot desktop one is a classic.
 
2012-05-30 06:41:35 PM  
So Subby's "prank" is a dick move...but here's one of my favorites:

A co-worker of mine always used to leave our shared PC unlocked and logged in when he would leave (he was the daytime manager, and I was graveyards) which would mean it had been unlocked for several hours before I got there, and after he left. Since we had a lot of confidential info on the PC, that was a pretty bad thing to do, so I had a little fun with him: I made a quick script that went into his startup folder (so it would only affect him) that would wait 5 minutes after he logged in, then pop up a window and say "You really screwed up your computer this time, didn't you?" Then shut down. I went home, and just sat next to the phone waiting, since he knew NOTHING about computers.

He actually sat on that for about 5 hours, trying and trying to start up without it happening (he was either stubborn, or hoping that it would just go away)...and he finally gave in and called me in a panic. I had him start up the computer, set it to lock whenever it went into sleep mode, and THEN had him remove the script...and he never figured out that it had been me the whole time. ;)

I heard the next day that he was just working in 5 minute intervals, rebooting the PC over and over again. /facepalm
 
2012-05-30 06:41:55 PM  
"Smoke weed everyday"
2/10

How about something at least remotely original?
 
2012-05-30 06:42:09 PM  
I'm a helpdesk guy and the Windows sysadmin at work. All of my coworkers have admin accounts that we use for all the tasks that you need admin access for around the office, and it's important that nobody else use those accounts - they could mess things up.

To that end, whenever anyone sees someone else's admin account logged in, we always change the background to something embarrassing and then log it out. Next time that person logs in, they get the embarrassing background as a reminder to log their shiat out.

The best use of this was when I set someone's background to a Live desktop of the My Little Pony theme song. He couldn't figure out where I had set that, never having used Live desktop before. I believe he found this out when he logged into the PC of a VIP, and the My Little Pony theme started going.

I haven't seen him make that mistake again.

/Yes, auto-logoff would make more sense, but this is more fun, and sometimes the admin accounts need to be logged in for a while.
 
2012-05-30 06:42:18 PM  

EvilEgg: Install the blue screen of death screen saver.


images.cheezburger.com
 
2012-05-30 06:42:30 PM  
I used to use remote management on XP or 2K to eject the CD just about every time a coworker played anything annoying, most of his music. It took weeks for him to figure out it was me.

I inter-office mailed the severed heads of some rabbit peeps that were being passed around one Easter. It was like The Godfather, but pink and marshmallowy.

But pranks that get others in trouble are lame.
 
2012-05-30 06:42:33 PM  

Timanous: Create a new folder called Icons.

Take screenshot of desktop

Make screenshot the active desktop image

Put all icons except for one folder in the new folder titled Icons.

Leave desktop image to fool the fool

The next day after he figures it out, come back and put two pieces of scotch tape over the laser on his mouse.


LOL
 
2012-05-30 06:42:35 PM  
This one wasn't me, but I had to "fix" it.

We had two people sharing a cubicle, with separate computers, and someone swapped their mice.

That is, computer #1 had computer #2's mouse (still attached to computer #2), and vice versa.

I got the tech call of "my mouse isn't working", and got there just in time for the second guy to make the same complaint.

Because I always have them demonstrate the issue (to remove PEBCAK issues), I noticed what was going on.
 
2012-05-30 06:43:06 PM  

AbbeySomeone: The_Sponge: CSB:

A coworker left his computer unlocked this morning, so I used it to send out an email asking a few people if we would like to join his Justin Bieber fan page on Facebook.

That's downright hateful.



Heh.

It's minor league pranking, but I just did it because he's (jokingly) accused me of being a Bieber fan, and I could see him on the other side of the building, so I didn't have enough time to do something better.
 
2012-05-30 06:43:24 PM  
Quickly plug in a secondary wireless mouse.
Wait for them to come back
Possessed computer
 
2012-05-30 06:43:51 PM  
There was one time that a coworker left his machine unlocked. I went in, took a print-screen of the desktop, set it as the wallpaper, copied all of his desktop icons to a folder and deleted everything on the desktop.

Another group of co-workers and I used to send love-letters to eachother from eachother's unlocked machines. We would cc ourselves and the others. Now that was dodgy and fun. Obviously has to be done with the right people.

A buddy did as similar thing at his workplace except with his crew it was resignation letters to the boss. It was a tight workplace where everyone got the joke.

I knew some IBM'ers who used to play "hide the laptop" with anyone who didn't lock their laptops to their desks.

A couple of guys I new at this telco would do things like change the outlook autocorrect dictionary to do things like replace the word "and" with the phrase "and, as a man with a fabulous moustache," That one caused all sorts of giggling.

Of course the old "tape the sensor/ball of the mouse" trick is always fun.
 
2012-05-30 06:44:29 PM  
A long time ago, I had a slacker placed in my duty section so I'd be a "good influence" on her. I was an E3, she was an E5 and she had about 15 years on me. She should have been mentoring me, right? Anyway, she played Solitaire all day long. It got to where that "click click" was like Chinese water torture. When she was away from her desk, I changed the command line to ".exx". I heard her cussing because she couldn't launch the game, but what's she gonna do? Call the help desk? She had no choice but to find some other way to waste time.

She ended up going AWOL and rather than get a Command-directed drug test went AWOL again. Later, she went to jail for driving the getaway car for her idiot boyfriend who tried to rob a grocery store with a hand grenade.

I work with some pretty cool people these days. No pranking/sabotage necessary.
 
2012-05-30 06:44:38 PM  
Took computer of a South Park fan and added a couple of startup/shutdown sounds.

HideyHo!
Screw you guys. I'm going home!

Amusing to here about it when he had to reboot his computer while talking to the no-help-whatsoever desk.
 
2012-05-30 06:45:11 PM  
I had a coworker where I changed all her windows sounds to fart noises, made sure the volume was all the way up, and removed the volume control icon from the taskbar. Sheer awesome.

Another time I used flat double-sided tape to tape down everything on her desk. Her file folders, her phone handset, her mouse.

The class, which was mentioned above, is the screencap-and-hide-the-icons gag, always a classic. We did that to our IT guy. We got an error message on one of our custom programs on a processing computer, so it was a message that wasn't really informative. Screencap, put it on all the other processing machines. Kept him busy for like four hours.
 
2012-05-30 06:45:53 PM  
Add some new entries into auto correct on word "is not" = "aint", "me" = "mac daddy", "not" "aint gonna"....
 
2012-05-30 06:45:56 PM  
I worked in a trading room at a brokerage office some years ago and someone sent one of the traders an email with attachment that said something like bikini babes or whatever. As this was still the early 2000's people couldstill be fooled into opening attachments. At any rate he opened it and it turned his screen pink and yelled "HEY EVERYBODY IM LOOKING AT GAY PORN" over and over again and there was the gay porn and when he tried to click out of it more gay porn came up. He had to pull the plug to stop it. The trading floor had a hardy laugh and the head trader wasn't even pissed. Those were simpler times.

/csb
 
2012-05-30 06:46:01 PM  
Someone in the computer lab of our law school modified the auto-correct in Word, so that the word "Louisiana" was changed to "Louisiana, Armpit of the Nation."

/wasn't me, really.
 
2012-05-30 06:46:08 PM  
HAHAHAHAA!!!! That is awesome, Subby!! You should do that!! SRSLY!!! Better yet, change his sig to say "I randomly jizz in co-workers food". I hear that one really gets some laughs too.

/Dick. I hope he punches you in the throat.
 
2012-05-30 06:46:22 PM  
I switched the m and n key, then changed the character mapping (back in the XP days). Thsi is great for typers who look at the screen and not the keyboard.
 
2012-05-30 06:46:38 PM  
step 1: open desktop
step 2: print screen
step 3: set to background
step 4: hide desktop icons and task bar
step 5: sit back and laugh as they maniacally try to click on things that aren't actually there

bonus is there is no harm done and nothing to install
 
2012-05-30 06:46:51 PM  
A 3/4" NPT coupling screws right onto a common or garden plastic water bottle .
Attach quick connect of your choice to coupling ,plug into air hose ,place bottle in hidden location(under a cardboard box for example)
Wait for victim to investigate and open air valve.
/Not a computer prank but funny as all hell.
//If you're watching from nearby wear ear plugs
 
2012-05-30 06:46:54 PM  
Go for something more subtle... swap the m and n keys.
 
2012-05-30 06:46:55 PM  
When I was working in a small office we would do pranks like this, nothing serious, silly files in places you wouldn't expect them or changing desktop pictures.

Once I wrote a sticky note saying, "Find what I changed". Of course, I didn't change anything, so it was a total win to watch him go through every single directory.
 
2012-05-30 06:47:04 PM  
We had a list on a white board: "Things ResTechs will never do". I filled it in as such:
- Give you up
- Let you down
- Let you cry
- Saaaaaaayyyyy goodbye
- Tell a lie
- Hurt you
- RickRoll
 
2012-05-30 06:48:45 PM  
I just change people's screensaver to Marquee with the text "Next time, you should lock your computer." If they keep leaving in unlocked, set their monitor's sleep time to one minute. That's lots of fun.

Changing the "m" and "n" keys, and mucking with auto-correct in Office is always fun. (Change the period to "as according to prophecy.")
 
2012-05-30 06:48:47 PM  
to be fair leaving your computer unlock is a dangerous threat to national secuirty and/or privacy. thus, teaching a lesson is important. do it for america!
 
2012-05-30 06:49:09 PM  
another good one is make an instant shutdown script file, change its icon to a folder, and then name it "Top Secret" or "All Employee Salary Information" and place it dead center in the desktop.
 
2012-05-30 06:49:17 PM  
Not a prank, per se, but an act of, "knock it off you annoying asshole."

I used to work in a maintenance shop. Part of it had two rows of our desks and we all had (scavenged) high back office chairs. The biggest trouble maker in the shop had the squeakiest chair.

In the morning the boss would come in, give the morning meeting, and hand out the work orders for the day. This trouble maker loved to squeak his chair in the rhythm that the boss spoke, while he was speaking. I got fed up with this one day and when no one was around I took penetrating oil and sprayed the shiat out of every moving part of that chair. He never could get it to squeak again and never knew why.
 
2012-05-30 06:49:45 PM  

darcsun: Going to stick up for Subby. I work in finance, which means this: If you leave your computer unlocked, someone can easily steal a client's identity. It's to the point were we can't even have cell phones out because people were taking pictures of accounts.

Just imagine how you would feel if your account information was stolen because some idiot couldn't hit Ctrl Alt Delete. I had a guy when I worked at The Vanguard Group that couldn't get that point through his head, even though we had institutional accounts up that were worth billions. Management knew about it and wouldn't do a thing. I would have loved for him to have gotten canned. He put millions of dollars at risk every time his dumb ass forgot something so simple.


Again, if they are that concerned with security, tell them to install proximity logoffs on your id badges. If you walk more than 'x' feet away, you are automatically logged off.
 
2012-05-30 06:49:47 PM  
Paper Clips - Hung paper-clip strands from the ceiling, attached work papers - This was last week
i.imgur.com

Xmas - Wrapped everything in the office
i.imgur.com

Peanuts - Made it appear as though the office was full (didn't have enough money for that)
i.imgur.com

Foil - Our first office prank
i.imgur.com

Beiber - Fever
i.imgur.com

Balloons - I think this is our best, 4-ft wall of balloons
i.imgur.com
 
2012-05-30 06:50:15 PM  

Current Resident: serpent_sky: My co-worker likes to change people's desktop photos to things they don't like (I usually get monkeys)

Wait, wait, wait... How can you not like monkeys?

downstairs: How about enable HTML emails and make the default font Comic Sans?

There is an administrative assistant in our company that uses Comic Sans for her default email font. True fact.


Hell, the district manager at the large national retail chain where i used to work used comic sans for all his emails. And colors. And lots of exclamation points!!!
 
2012-05-30 06:50:29 PM  
There used to be a bit of a meme at my workplace where if someone left their machine unlocked you (they) sent a mail to a particular alias professing your (their) love of pink fairies (or something like that). However, at some point it got a bit out of control and HR blasted out a missive making it a fireable offense to send email using someone's unlocked computer. Booooo! So we don't do that much anymore.

Screenshot of the desktop as the desktop is a good one and fairly harmless. Scheduled tasks can also be fun: even just opening notepad twice a day or something will slowly drive them insane. If you want to be a dick, mess up their BIOS. Set a weird boot partition and then password protect it or something.
 
2012-05-30 06:50:43 PM  

Oysterman: We had a list on a white board: "Things ResTechs will never do". I filled it in as such:
- Give you up
- Let you down
- Let you cry
- Saaaaaaayyyyy goodbye
- Tell a lie
- Hurt you
- RickRoll


Jesus...I was just rick rolled via text and it was still just as annoying.
 
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