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(CNN)   Is Mitt Romney actually a unicorn, and thus ineligible for the presidency? We're just asking questions   (cnn.com) divider line 185
    More: Silly, Mitt Romney, Secretary of State of Arizona, John Sununu, Soledad O'Brien, Stephanie Cutter, African-American firsts, Arizonans  
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11456 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 May 2012 at 5:05 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-30 06:07:05 PM  
I really misunderstood what this headline was trying to suggest. Thought it was maybe another polygamy dig gone horribly awry.

/dating a unicorn
//Mitt Romney is no unicorn
 
2012-05-30 06:08:30 PM  
Mitt R, just like obamma B, is the finest cocksucker known to man.
 
2012-05-30 06:08:37 PM  

LaraAmber: Since he was born in Michigan, isn't he ineligible for the Ohio ballot? My parents are pretty damn convinced there are only 49 states. I think that makes him a Mexican-Canadian in their eyes.

/O-H


Mexican-Canadian... That's a bit geographically complex, isn't it?

I love how people from different parts of the States always have that one state that doesn't count. Missouri, Michigan, Hawaii, Maine, North Dakota, Nebraska... There's always some state or commonwealth or whatever that some locals disdain as "not a real state." Never fails to amuse me.

And so I thank you.
 
2012-05-30 06:10:38 PM  

xpisblack: As beefoe points out, the question of a candidate's unicornity isn't constitutionally relevant, so this campaign-- whilst vaguely entertaining-- is both stupid and pointless as long as Gov. Romney is over 35, has lived in the States for at least 14 years, and was either a) born in the USA or b) born abroad with two US citizens as parents. Aside from that, he could be an underpants gnome and still qualify for the ballot (at least until the Court rules on the implication of humanity in the Constitution's eligibility requirements).

But yes, he's most likely a Vogon or a replicant.


If he's a replicant (or a terminator?) he's an early version; easy to spot.
 
2012-05-30 06:10:41 PM  
 
2012-05-30 06:11:36 PM  
Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?

Question: Was Romney's digital birth certificate filled with wierd layers, artifacts, and blatantly mismatched type fonts?
 
2012-05-30 06:14:58 PM  
So I guess the enemy of my enemy principle is supposed to make this seem funny?
 
2012-05-30 06:15:55 PM  

CygnusDarius: BronyMedic: CygnusDarius: Because derpy stares can fix the economy.

No. Because then some blogger named Yamino, who is the voice of all handicapped people on the internet and emperor of the mentally challenged, will tell us how we're just laughing at the disabled because of Derpy.

/Yamino can go fornicate herself with an axe handle.

Who the fark is yamino and why should I care?.


Google is your friend.

Have fun.

Gawker farking sucks, I mean who doesn't know to at least farking do research to farking find out that the farking name of the farking MLP kingdom if farking Equestria and not farking Celestia, which is the farking name of the farking princess, I mean Gorramit all, just farking ask your six your old kid you farking idiot...oh wait, this is farking gawker, I don't think any farking writer there can get a farking date, much less farking mate...I farking hate farking gawker

Link

Link

oh, and this is just funny: Link
 
2012-05-30 06:16:05 PM  
since 0bama said he would rather be a good one term President and he has promised us rainbows and Unicorns, he must have realized back then that Romney should be President. He probably voted for Romney in the primaries and was frustrated that McCain lost.
 
2012-05-30 06:16:51 PM  

socodog: Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?

Question: Was Romney's digital birth certificate filled with wierd layers, artifacts, and blatantly mismatched type fonts?


Wrong. He still hasn't released all of his marriage certificates. How many more wives is he hiding? Why won't he release all of them?
 
2012-05-30 06:17:23 PM  

socodog: Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?



Romney is?

He was a farking Baker Scholar at Harvard, top 5%. Not sure what we will see there.
 
2012-05-30 06:18:19 PM  
... but he could be our first Mexican president.
 
2012-05-30 06:21:07 PM  

sabreWulf07: socodog: Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?

Question: Was Romney's digital birth certificate filled with wierd layers, artifacts, and blatantly mismatched type fonts?

Wrong. He still hasn't released all of his marriage certificates. How many more wives is he hiding? Why won't he release all of them?


His marriage cert says 'spouse' not 'only one spouse' I don't know about you but I find that troubling.
 
2012-05-30 06:21:45 PM  
lh6.googleusercontent.com

CELESTIA 2012!
 
2012-05-30 06:22:20 PM  
MY LITTLE ROMNEY: SUPERPACS ARE MAGIC

images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2012-05-30 06:24:23 PM  

tenpoundsofcheese: since 0bama said he would rather be a good one term President and he has promised us rainbows and Unicorns, he must have realized back then that Romney should be President. He probably voted for Romney in the primaries and was frustrated that McCain lost.


Can I buy some pot from you?
 
2012-05-30 06:29:08 PM  

socodog: Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?


Was either of Obama's two birth certificates good enough for you?

socodog: Question: Was Romney's digital birth certificate filled with wierd layers, artifacts,


I dunno, link us to the .pdf and let's find out. Most likely yes, since it's an artifact of the OCR process that's a standard part of .pdf conversion.

and blatantly mismatched type fonts?

Again, link it and let's find out. And Obama's didn't have any mismatched fonts.
 
2012-05-30 06:30:52 PM  

Sim Tree: Actually, I've done a complete 180 on that change. She's a bit clumsy, but constantly strives in spite of it; it's adorable. She does NOT have down's syndrome. Making her out to be some idiot, a Jar Jar Binks-esque, comic relief character, existing only to be laughed at by all, runs expressly against the entire theme for the show, isn't true to the character, and really isn't a fair assessment if her abilities.


Hell, I thought that from the start. Saw the clip and I thought; "The hell, is that supposed to have down syndrome or something?" Especially combined with the name.

If you want a proper voice and personality, check out the fan made "Dr. Whooves and his assistant."
 
2012-05-30 06:30:53 PM  
i.qkme.me
 
2012-05-30 06:33:20 PM  
Satanic_Hamster: Hell, I thought that from the start. Saw the clip and I thought; "The hell, is that supposed to have down syndrome or something?" Especially combined with the name.

If you want a proper voice and personality, check out the fan made "Dr. Whooves and his assistant."


Her voice actor, Tabitha St. Germain, was never told that Derpy was supposed to be a girl. Since they can't make assumptions based on what the fandom says, she had to go with the script and make the voice different. So she did. She tried to be a man.
 
2012-05-30 06:35:37 PM  

sabreWulf07: Wrong. He still hasn't released all of his marriage certificates. How many more wives is he hiding? Why won't he release all of them?


See, this one remains the far better question (in the sense that it more accurately parallels the birth-certificate faux-kerfuffle). It's offensive, it's non-provable, it plays on stereotypes, and it can creepily insinuate its way into any topic in which Gov. Romney's name might arise. Any Arizonans want to start up the campaign?
 
2012-05-30 06:36:06 PM  

tenpoundsofcheese: socodog: Well, he's released his transcripts, so that should be good enough for you libs, right?



Romney is?

He was a farking Baker Scholar at Harvard, top 5%. Not sure what we will see there.


And Obama graduated Magna Cum Laude from the same school. Romney only graduated Summa.
 
2012-05-30 06:50:50 PM  
"The fact is that this country has a jobs problem, and supporters of the president like CNN keep wanting to talk about other issues," Sununu said.

***
In a radio interview with KFYI's Mike Broomhead, Arizona Secretary of State Ken Bennett (R) said he would consider keeping the president off the ballot if the state failed to answer his request.
***
Mitt Romney's presidential campaign collided with Donald Trump's "birther" rhetoric on Tuesday as the reality television star hosted a fundraiser for the Republican while claiming again that President Barack Obama is foreign-born.
***

These are clearly the actions of CNN and the Democrats, Mr. Sununu. Thank you for pointing it out to us.
 
2012-05-30 06:51:49 PM  

xpisblack: ... as long as Gov. Romney is over 35, has lived in the States for at least 14 years, and was either a) born in the USA or b) born abroad with two one US citizens as parents.


FTFY

The craziest, derpiest part of this crazy derpfest is that it doesn't matter where he was born.

His mother was an American citizen, therefore he's an American citizen by birth. End of story.
 
2012-05-30 06:57:50 PM  
HA HA!

/HA!
//Stupid.
///Mildly embarrassed I even came in here.
 
2012-05-30 07:14:52 PM  

BronyMedic: Her voice actor, Tabitha St. Germain, was never told that Derpy was supposed to be a girl. Since they can't make assumptions based on what the fandom says, she had to go with the script and make the voice different. So she did. She tried to be a man.


A man with down syndrome, maybe.
 
2012-05-30 07:20:39 PM  
images.wikia.com

I think they meant Unicron instead of unicorn.
 
2012-05-30 07:24:28 PM  
Mitt is so 'special' that Moron is now a proper noun in his honor.
 
2012-05-30 07:25:01 PM  
Technically, just being a unicorn wouldn't disqualify him- so long as he was a natural born unicorn.

/TMYK
 
mhd
2012-05-30 07:33:50 PM  
Once, I can't remember
I was, long ago, someone strange
I was innocent and wise
And full of pain

Now that I'm a Romney
Everything is strange
 
2012-05-30 07:37:07 PM  
I support this line of pursuit. I further hope that we shall see unicorn signs at his rallies.

On Derpy:
What angers me so much about the stupid, stupid rant over Derpy is these people who are "Defending" the disabled have no idea they're slighting people with strabismus and speech impediments. I've known people with strabismus, hell I knew a chick who had two "lazy eyes", and could only control one at a time. She was brilliantly smart, for god's sake. And a lot of smart people have speech impediments. James Earl Jones had a stutter for fark's sake!

Seriously! What's wrong with Derpy? She's clumsy, has strabismus, and a speech impediment. NONE OF THESE THINGS POINT TO MENTAL DEFICIENCY, let alone something chromosomal like Down's!

And I just hate that the people being white knights seem to entirely miss the serious implied insult to people with unrelated issues.
 
2012-05-30 07:37:22 PM  

xpisblack: As beefoe points out, the question of a candidate's unicornity isn't constitutionally relevant, so this campaign-- whilst vaguely entertaining-- is both stupid and pointless as long as Gov. Romney is over 35, has lived in the States for at least 14 years, and was either a) born in the USA or b) born abroad with two US citizens as parents. Aside from that, he could be an underpants gnome and still qualify for the ballot (at least until the Court rules on the implication of humanity in the Constitution's eligibility requirements).


By your definition, a dog could be president (especially if we measure the 35 year age and 14 year residency requirements in dog years).

That is disgusting that you would advocate for a filthy, auto-fellating, feces-eating animal to be President of the United States. You, xpisblack disgust me and any right-thinking American with your vile notions of inter-species governance.
 
2012-05-30 07:42:15 PM  

fusillade762: InternetSecurityGuard: The Constitution says the president has to be a person. I don't see anything there about species.

That means a troll would be eligible, which could lead to a Trump presidency. Scary stuff.


I would love nothing more than for this Pony thread to become a Homestuck thread and then become an Epic Thread as it completely devolves into inter-fan warfare tinged with politics.

/Gamzee for president
//honk
 
2012-05-30 07:51:21 PM  
And magic makes it all complete!
 
2012-05-30 07:52:09 PM  
It will be a landslide and the electoral college will be an afterthought.

Of course, I'm betting that when Obama goes in front of a national audience around 10 o'clock on election night to concede, the inner cities will begin to burn minutes later.

Ok, so this WILL be a mess.

 
2012-05-30 07:55:54 PM  
[sigh] I answered this in the version of the thread that didn't get greenlit. I can't imagine why....

Mitt Romney is not a unicorn.

He is, objectively speaking, good looking enough to be a unicorn. He is wealthy enough that he could conceivably buy enough privacy to hide a lifestyle of easy promiscuity. He might even be a closeted bisexual.

However, Romney is male, and he is married.

Since everybody knows a unicorn is the hot, single, bi chick at the swing party willing to have sex with a guy and his wife, simple logic proves that Mitt Romney is not and cannot possibly be a unicorn.
 
2012-05-30 08:05:57 PM  

Ringshadow: And I just hate that the people being white knights seem to entirely miss the serious implied insult to people with unrelated issues.


I have strabismus, actually, but I don't find Derpy Hooves (or any of the other derp memes) insulting, just funny. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

/Are you a wizard?
//YES, I AM.
 
2012-05-30 08:12:32 PM  

Fluorescent Testicle: ... Derpy Hooves

, the furor surrounding her ...

/FTFM.
//Derpers gonna derp. :)
 
2012-05-30 08:26:20 PM  

Fluorescent Testicle: Ringshadow: And I just hate that the people being white knights seem to entirely miss the serious implied insult to people with unrelated issues.

I have strabismus, actually, but I don't find Derpy Hooves (or any of the other derp memes) insulting, just funny. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

/Are you a wizard?
//YES, I AM.



XD Well that's good at least. And I didn't figure Derpy was the insulting one, but the jerks claiming Derpy has Downs were.

/Derpy and Twilight Sparkle are best ponies
 
2012-05-30 08:33:13 PM  

pedobearapproved: I was actually just talking to people on Coast 2 Coast AM about this very issue!

My real concern is that G. W. Bush is a Changeling that has taken a new form as Barack Obama. I do believe that the only way we can rid ourselves of Bush is by electing a true born unicorn. The people I've been in contact with have told me that Trump has actually figured this out, and this is why he is raising these "birther" issues. Because he knows that Obama prior to 2008 is a projection into the minds of people created by other Changelings. At that point Bush assumed a new form and now projects his true self as he once projected Obama. As you can see his powers have grown.

The evidence of this is everywhere! Everyone knows Changelings must educate themselves in their art in Indonesia. And must be "fathered" aka "re-born" by an East African skilled in these arts. Which is why Obama appears younger than G. W. Bush. And once the change had been completed we learned this about Obusha! He even mocks us with the evidence!

[blogs.sfweekly.com image 466x718]

You've heard how Bush Sr. was a member of the CIA, and the Bilderberg/illuminati. He learned that he was too old to be allowed to learn these secrets but was able to place his son into these groups. I also believe that Bush Sr. has passed some of this soul/spirit in an attempt an immortality. Which Bush Jr. just stole which is why Obama appeared so lifelike to everyone.

This election is not about the president, it is control of the high illuminati priest position. A struggle between those that would usher in the New World Order brainwashing American concentration camps and those that stuck with the Knights Templar honor before the split into the present day illuminati (aka the Mormons).


Don't you remember anything from DS9? Earth and the Federation won't attact the Founders attention until we start having incursions into the Gamma Quadrant in the 2360s.
 
2012-05-30 08:34:04 PM  
Keep that attention on the birther movement, Lefties...

...anything to try and draw the country's attention away from the President's moronic handling of the economy.

/dude is electoral toast.
//and I hate Mitt Romney.
 
2012-05-30 08:55:05 PM  

G-Rot: Keep that attention on the birther movement, Lefties...

...anything to try and draw the country's attention away from the President's moronic handling of the economy.

/dude is electoral toast.
//and I hate Mitt Romney.


3/10. At best.
 
2012-05-30 08:56:38 PM  

Ringshadow: /Derpy and Twilight Sparkle are best ponies


It's so rare to know another who appreciates Twilight Sparkle. Good to know the Forger of Ponies knows.
 
2012-05-30 08:56:56 PM  

G-Rot: Keep that attention on the birther movement, Lefties...

...anything to try and draw the country's attention away from the President's moronic handling of the economy.


Yes, keep pointing to that Obama economy that keeps getting better and better every day, Righties. Keep talking about those high gas prices, oh wait, gas is going down too? Surely the GOP will be crediting Obama with this any minute now.
 
2012-05-30 09:00:51 PM  

G-Rot: Keep that attention on the birther movement, Lefties...

...anything to try and draw the country's attention away from the President's moronic handling of the economy.

/dude is electoral toast.
//and I hate Mitt Romney.


Tell me how, specifically, Romney is going to get Florida, Ohio and Pennsylvania when the guy whom beat him, McCain, couldn't?
 
2012-05-30 09:02:22 PM  

Soup4Bonnie: "The fact is that this country has a jobs problem, and supporters of the president like CNN keep wanting to talk about other issues," Sununu said.

***
In a radio interview with KFYI's Mike Broomhead, Arizona Secretary of State Ken Bennett (R) said he would consider keeping the president off the ballot if the state failed to answer his request.
***
Mitt Romney's presidential campaign collided with Donald Trump's "birther" rhetoric on Tuesday as the reality television star hosted a fundraiser for the Republican while claiming again that President Barack Obama is foreign-born.
***

These are clearly the actions of CNN and the Democrats, Mr. Sununu. Thank you for pointing it out to us.


I really enjoyed watching Sununu shut down Soledad O'Brien this morning. He asked if she was at all ashamed for parrotting Obama talking points from the day before. She tried to argue and then stopped when he pointed out that the derp she was spewing was deflecting talk of the economy.

He also pointed out that Romney 'created' few jobs in MA when he was governor because unemployment was already at a low 4.2 percent.

I can almost guarantee that Soledad will come on tomorrow to try to refute his facts. She always does when she is shut down by a show guest. She waits until they are not there to defend themselves.
 
2012-05-30 09:06:06 PM  

Opeth1429: I really enjoyed watching Sununu shut down Soledad O'Brien this morning. He asked if she was at all ashamed for parrotting Obama talking points from the day before. She tried to argue and then stopped when he pointed out that the derp she was spewing was deflecting talk of the economy.

He also pointed out that Romney 'created' few jobs in MA when he was governor because unemployment was already at a low 4.2 percent.

I can almost guarantee that Soledad will come on tomorrow to try to refute his facts. She always does when she is shut down by a show guest. She waits until they are not there to defend themselves.


Shouldn't those magic republican ideals have dropped it below that? I thought republicans were masters, are you saying they can't do anything?
 
2012-05-30 09:41:50 PM  
Applejack and fluttershy are not only best ponies, but best role models for girls.
 
2012-05-30 09:49:50 PM  
Kind of makes me wonder. Just like I wonder wether or not Glen Beck raped and murdered that girl in 1990.
 
2012-05-30 09:59:53 PM  
Lets see here... hmm... found it! Unicorn reference checklist. Let's see:

[x] My Little Pony

[x] Robot Unicorn Attack

[ ] Charlie the Unicorn

[x] My Little Pony (because no thread is going to have just one of them)

[x] Unicron

[x] Obama being magical like a unicorn

[x] Unicorns crap rainbows

[x] Smug Unicorn

What heresy is this!? No Charlie the Unicorn? Not even a maaaaagical Liopleurodon?! I am saddened fark, saddened.

/although this thread somehow managed to avoid being hijacked by ponies, which I am thoroughly surprised at
 
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