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(Daily Mail)   For sale: Fixer upper. 48 bedrooms, no bath. $4 million. No HOA   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 86
    More: Cool, English Heritage, Elizabeth I, Rupert Everett, historical drama, Charles I, permanent residents, Colin Firth, Daily Telegraph  
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33416 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 May 2012 at 7:53 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



86 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-05-28 04:54:27 PM  
They don't need a bathroom thank you.
Her Majesty does not poop.

Pooping is for commoners.
 
2012-05-28 05:47:07 PM  
The princely pile, near Oundle, Northamptonshire, has no bathroom and carries a £100,000-a-year maintenance bill. Conditions of sale stipulate that the new owner must also keep the hall open to the public for at least 28 days a year.

I don't know about you, subs, but that sounds like the HOA From HELL to me.
 
2012-05-28 07:38:41 PM  
I would love to be rich enough to be able to afford that. Every February i'd just go and live in my London home, since if I could afford that i'd have homes everywhere nice.

Also I wish these so call taxpayer groups would stop complaining. Firstly it wasn't a waste of taxpayers money to fix it up, and secondly English Heritage gets a lot of money from private sources as well, it's not completely taxpayer funded. It's better that the government swallow a £5m loss to save a historic building than have that building collapse into ruin. Given that your average politician takes a £5m bribe just to take a shiat these days it's nothing. Eliminate corruption first then we'll talk about morons with no business acumen being put in positions that require business acumen.
 
2012-05-28 08:01:03 PM  
Calling Donald Trump, calling Donald Trump!
 
2012-05-28 08:01:46 PM  
Does the Daily Mail own Fark or something?
 
2012-05-28 08:02:27 PM  
i would wind up drinking bleach

if i was in that living room

how depressing

with all those high ceilings
 
2012-05-28 08:06:07 PM  
subby, which house has the 48 bedrooms?
 
2012-05-28 08:06:28 PM  

Need_MindBleach: Does the Daily Mail own Fark or something?


No, they sublease from World Nut Daily and Brietbart.
 
2012-05-28 08:06:42 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: The princely pile, near Oundle, Northamptonshire, has no bathroom and carries a £100,000-a-year maintenance bill. Conditions of sale stipulate that the new owner must also keep the hall open to the public for at least 28 days a year.

I don't know about you, subs, but that sounds like the HOA From HELL to me.


Just bugger off to the continent in August like every other native and leave the princely piles to the turrists.
 
Skr
2012-05-28 08:11:28 PM  
No bath? That is nothing a chamber pot and a couple of chamber maids couldn't solve.
 
2012-05-28 08:11:44 PM  
Unfortunately, it will probably be a Sheikh or Russian billionaire.

/or maybe a German, like in Buckingham
 
2012-05-28 08:14:42 PM  

Skr: No bath? That is nothing a chamber pot and a couple of chamber maids couldn't solve.


Why tarnish a perfectly good chamber pot when you have chamber maids?
 
2012-05-28 08:14:45 PM  
Looks like another great place for kink.com to purchase and shoot cool porn vids from.
 
2012-05-28 08:17:59 PM  
I remember last year when they were asking $125,000,000.00

Real estate prices sure have taken a beating in that neighborhood!
 
2012-05-28 08:23:26 PM  
I wonder if you'd be allowed to refit a few rooms to be a modern apartment with modern luxuries, or would you be restricted from doing anything anachronistic to the entire property.

And with 48 rooms... If you could install baths you'd have a luxury resort for corporate retreats.
 
2012-05-28 08:24:15 PM  

Skr: No bath? That is nothing a chamber pot and a couple of chamber maids couldn't solve.


True.
I leave those tawdry little tasks to my wipers.
 
2012-05-28 08:25:38 PM  
I would really love a castle.
 
2012-05-28 08:27:11 PM  
At one point it was a school, how can you have a school with no bathrooms?
 
2012-05-28 08:28:09 PM  

wildcardjack: I wonder if you'd be allowed to refit a few rooms to be a modern apartment with modern luxuries, or would you be restricted from doing anything anachronistic to the entire property.

And with 48 rooms... If you could install baths you'd have a luxury resort for corporate retreats.



But make everyone dress in period dress.
 
2012-05-28 08:28:28 PM  
Would still poop on.

backseatcuddler.com
 
2012-05-28 08:31:06 PM  
It's beautiful. None of the houses built since 1900 will last half that long.
 
2012-05-28 08:43:14 PM  
James I himself is believed to have enjoyed homosexual trysts when he visited the home 10 times between 1614 and 1624.

The realtor is just trying to be trendy.
 
2012-05-28 08:43:18 PM  
Some of these houses are over twentyyy years old.
Here is a Tudor mansion and here is a four door mansion.

/obscure?
 
2012-05-28 08:56:05 PM  
Subby that thing comes with something more diabolical than any HOA could dream up.

An historical preservation designation.
 
2012-05-28 09:00:44 PM  

Need_MindBleach: Does the Daily Mail own Fark or something?


Nah

Subby must work for the Daily Fail and is giving the gay buttseckx to one or more of the admins.
 
2012-05-28 09:01:56 PM  
Nice farking house.
 
2012-05-28 09:02:59 PM  

Skr: No bath? That is nothing a chamber pot and a couple of chamber maids couldn't solve.


You'd bathe in a chamber pot?
 
2012-05-28 09:05:08 PM  
Turn part of it into a haunted house in for the duration of October


I have no idea what I'd do with 48 rooms...I just don't have that much stuff
 
2012-05-28 09:06:18 PM  
Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Gorgeous.

But I see a buyer along the lines of a Middle East moneybags or a Russian zillionaire. Oh, for the good old days when your garden variety millionaire rocker could snap it up. They would've never torn it down to build a monument to their own ego. [Talking to you, Pia Zadora & her first hubby]

That said, I'd love to see if a Gallagher brother or Kanye would eye it. Or any high roller in the IT world. Or a too-moneyed celebutante like Ms. Eccleston.
 
2012-05-28 09:06:21 PM  
Why is it that the article, the photo captions and the sidebar all say the same thing?

Also 4 million pounds to crap in a chamber pot and not be able to shower? No.
 
2012-05-28 09:15:23 PM  
Jacobean?

www.movievillains.com
 
2012-05-28 09:18:50 PM  
Rudy will await your foundation
 
2012-05-28 09:19:38 PM  
It's really not practical unless you do a lot of entertaining.

I would say sell it to some rap mogul with an entourage, but then I noticed there's no swimming pool. You can't have a hip hop mansion without a location for hip hop pool parties.
 
2012-05-28 09:25:04 PM  
FTA "As the government's protector of England's unique legacy of historic buildings, it was crucial that English Heritage took action to save Apethorpe Hall before it was too late."


I concur that getting it out of the hands of the English Heritage looks like the best way to go about that.
 
2012-05-28 09:30:58 PM  
It would be a fun place to throw a Fark party. I bet Drew caries that kind of money in his wallet
 
2012-05-28 09:31:28 PM  
Um, well, what we are talking about in privy terms is the latest in front wall fresh air orifices combined with a wide capacity gutter installation below.
 
2012-05-28 09:32:33 PM  
If it came with a title I'd buy it. Lord Flucto would be most amused.
 
2012-05-28 09:34:18 PM  
"We will go on the pile of clothes in the hallway, as we have always done!"
"I don't know whose clothes those are, somebody ain't wearin' that no more..."
 
2012-05-28 09:36:34 PM  
do you just shiat in the woods?
 
2012-05-28 09:37:47 PM  
It's a LARPer's dream.


/that, and getting laid
 
Skr
2012-05-28 09:41:59 PM  

fusillade762: Skr: No bath? That is nothing a chamber pot and a couple of chamber maids couldn't solve.

You'd bathe in a chamber pot?


Of course. 2 Maids 1 Pot
 
2012-05-28 09:42:04 PM  
Well I could use a new house, fit the place with some plumbing and a HVAC system; a new professional kitchen. Host the Queen and try to talk one of the royals into a hot homo love affair.
 
2012-05-28 09:42:07 PM  

GameSprocket: Um, well, what we are talking about in privy terms is the latest in front wall fresh air orifices combined with a wide capacity gutter installation below.


You mean you crap out of the window?
 
2012-05-28 09:42:45 PM  

blackhonda: At one point it was a school, how can you have a school with no bathrooms?


You don't eat your meat!
/Headmaster
 
2012-05-28 09:43:28 PM  

gingerjet: Some of these houses are over twentyyy years old.
Here is a Tudor mansion and here is a four door mansion.

/obscure?


The only movie that SJP actually looked hot in?
 
2012-05-28 09:44:19 PM  

gingerjet: Some of these houses are over twentyyy years old.
Here is a Tudor mansion and here is a four door mansion.

/obscure?


You're really nobody in L.A. unless you live in a house with a really big door.
 
2012-05-28 09:44:56 PM  

StinkyFiddlewinks: blackhonda: At one point it was a school, how can you have a school with no bathrooms?

You don't eat your meat!
/Headmaster


It was catholic... according to Family guy pooping is a sin
 
2012-05-28 09:46:08 PM  

Flint Ironstag: GameSprocket: Um, well, what we are talking about in privy terms is the latest in front wall fresh air orifices combined with a wide capacity gutter installation below.

You mean you crap out of the window?


Oh, that's alright then, I really hate those nasty indoor ones.
 
2012-05-28 09:50:03 PM  
www.liquorsnob.com
 
2012-05-28 09:50:38 PM  
If I had the money to buy that house, I could easily buy a crane, some port-a-potties, and install doors leading outside for each room.
 
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