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(Bleacher Report)   Tonight on a patriotic Memorial Day WWE Monday Night Raw, John Cena will support the troops, Randy Orton will dishonorably discharge in a duffel bag, and Chris Jericho will desecrate the flags of every country but the US. 9 PM on USA   (bleacherreport.com) divider line 37
    More: Interesting, Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, John Cena, United States, Memorial Day, WWE Championship, Alberto Del Rio, Cody Rhodes  
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372 clicks; posted to Sports » on 28 May 2012 at 8:00 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-05-28 09:46:01 PM  
5 votes:
I haven't been able to do this in ages.

i.imgur.com
HEY GRANDPA!!

i.imgur.com
YES, MY BOY!!!

i.imgur.com
KNOW HOW I'VE BEEN JOBBING WITH THWAGGER FOR THE LAST SIX MONTHS?

i.imgur.com
HOW CAN I NOT KNOW?

i.imgur.com
WELL I'M DITCHIN' 'EM AND GOIN' SOLO!

i.imgur.com
EXCELLENT, SONNY! NOW WHAT'S YOUR NEXT MOVE?

i.imgur.com
I'M GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA!

i.imgur.com
ALRIGHT! NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! WHAT YOU GOING TO DO AND WHO ARE YOU GOING TO WRESTLE?

i.imgur.com
I'M GONNA WRESTLE ZACK RYDER FOR HIS MADE UP INTERNET BELT!

i.imgur.com
2012-05-28 10:47:44 PM  
3 votes:
The reason this Raw isn't the clusterf*ck last week was......

Vince: ZZZzzzzzZZZZZzzzzzzz....mmrrhmm Cena oh I didn't see you there....mmmmhhhmm...zzzzz...yes I'll help put the oil on you....zzzzzz........oh, you've never been with a man before?..........mmmhhhmmmmrrrmmm yeah I'll go gentle there....yes my squat form is impeccable, thanks for noticing....zzzzz......

Michael Hayes: Uh, boss? Boss! Vince, wake up!

Vince: *snort* WHAT, WHAT GOD DAMMIT! IT'S MEMORIAL DAY I'M SLEEPING OFF MY 3 DAY BENDER OF LEFTOVER ICOPRO AND COCAINE!!!

Hayes: Raw's tonight. We sent you a script but you never approved it. We had to go with a draft.

Vince: WHAT?!! WHAT THE F*CK YOU WENT ON-AIR WITHOUT ME?!! HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO SPORTS ENTERTAIN WITHOUT MY INPUT?!! WHAT THE HELL'S YOUR PROBLEM?!!!

Hayes: Well to be honest, Vince, it's gone pretty well. We had a good 17 minute match with Punk and Bryan, AJ did a good spot and Kane was on-cue as always.

Vince: OH GODDAMMIT I DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY TO GO OUT THERE RIGHT NOW! THAT EXPIRED ICOPRO IS TEARING MY BOWELS OPEN LIKE A 2 YEAR OLD RIPPING THROUGH CHRISTMAS WRAPPING PAPER! I'LL REVIEW THIS SH*T LATER. DID YOU AT LEAST GET CENA ON THERE FOR A QUARTER HOUR?

Hayes: No, he's busy with the divorce. B-but we got him to do a voiceover for the troops!

Vince; Listen to me. I'm gonna go flush all the protein paste from my lower intestine like an old Civil War cannon, and you are going to clean it all up. With nothing but a baby wipe.
2012-05-29 08:54:13 AM  
2 votes:
"Brain?"

"Not so loud Monsoon."

"Sorry Brain... How many margaritas did we have last night?"

"I lost count... somewhere... in the double digits."

"I haven't drank that much since Pat Patterson's last fancy dress party."

"Do you remember anything from that night Monsoon."

"Thankfully, no..."
2012-05-28 10:18:17 PM  
2 votes:
Bah Gawd it's Kane!

img15.imageshack.us
2012-05-31 03:47:38 AM  
1 votes:

FirstNationalBastard: Praise Cheesus:
With Linda running for the United States Senate, Vince can't afford headlines involving one of the biggest names in his company getting caught with a banned type of steroid in his system. Chances are, he bought the stuff on the last Mexico tour. Perhaps the best thing Vince could do, since I am certain there are clauses in WWE contracts that cover use of illegal substances being grounds for termination of the agreement, would be to cut Randy loose from his contract now, with the understanding that if he completes a WWE financed rehab program he would be eligible to be brought back to the company.

Yeah, but, TNA is there with a big contract and doesn't care what you inject, snort, or smoke.

It wold not be in Vince's best interest to release Orton and see Andy Rorton show up in the Impact Zone.


OMG TAZZ, IT IS, IT IS ANDY RORTON! WHAT"S HE DOING HERE?

WAIT. WHAT"S THIS, TO RVD? NO, NO, OMG TAZZ HE JUST GAVE RVD THE ARM KAYO! THE LESSON THRILLER HAS ARRIVED!
2012-05-30 10:14:48 PM  
1 votes:

Smiths: WRONG GODDAMN THREAD!


I'm pretty sure that works in just about every thread you post in.
2012-05-30 07:36:42 PM  
1 votes:

Praise Cheesus: Breaking news

Randy Orton has been suspended for 60 days, due to a second violation of the WWE Talent Wellness Program.


Is this from one of the "legit" sheets?

Second, if true, when did they start testing for metamucil?
2012-05-30 07:02:42 PM  
1 votes:
In brief:

The RAW rating for this week was 2.7, down from last week's 3.0. WWE officials are stating the drop was expected due to the holiday weekend.

Do not expect to see Tensai outside of WWE Superstars for a while, as WWE officials were unimpressed with his April 16 bout against John Cena. The character is undergoing a complete re-tooling, which is why they had to come up with the idiotic Laryngitis/Big Slow angle.

Chris Jericho continues to make light of his 30 day suspension on his Twitter account.

Finally, the current creative plans for Wrestlemania 29 have The Undertaker battling Brock Lesner.

Seriously, the time has come for Shane and Stephanie to think about putting Vince in a home. I understand Verne Gagne needs a roommate.
2012-05-29 09:55:37 PM  
1 votes:

FirstNationalBastard: tbaughm: This thread needs more AJ, obviously

[www.ring-rap.com image 640x426]

[www.allwrestlingsuperstars.com image 541x718]

[www.wrestlingsuperstars.info image 345x433]

[www.impactwrestling.com image 433x650]


www.wzronline.com
Would like you to go on...
2012-05-29 09:16:58 PM  
1 votes:

tbaughm: This thread needs more AJ, obviously


www.ring-rap.com

www.allwrestlingsuperstars.com

www.wrestlingsuperstars.info

www.impactwrestling.com
2012-05-28 11:10:36 PM  
1 votes:

Mortificial: Is that how the show is really ending? That's... that's awful.


WELL ITS A BAD SHOWWW
WELL ITS A BAD BAD SHOW TONIGHT YALLLLL
2012-05-28 11:08:51 PM  
1 votes:

Igor Jakovsky: Oh my God they killed kofi


You bastards
2012-05-28 11:08:24 PM  
1 votes:
i6.photobucket.com
2012-05-28 10:58:29 PM  
1 votes:

verbaltoxin: How is this the darkest 24 hours in WWE history? Wouldn't that automatically be the guy who murdered his wife and children, then hung himself?


That only happened once though. Cena got punched TWICE
2012-05-28 10:58:08 PM  
1 votes:
It's Slurms McKenzie!!

Wimmy Wam Wam Wozzle!!
2012-05-28 10:52:15 PM  
1 votes:
ECW: matches from the vault.
2012-05-28 10:25:58 PM  
1 votes:
fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net
2012-05-28 10:16:20 PM  
1 votes:

phedex: Dougie AXP: God I would do horrible horrible things to that crazy woman. (AJ)


If someone told me I would have to screw kharma to get to her, I would do it.


Unfortunately for you, I have a feeling Kharma would rip your junk off, so it really wouldn't do you any good anyway.
2012-05-28 10:15:39 PM  
1 votes:
WWE Creative @WWE_Creative
No one else has dated one of Lawler's ex-girlfriends because statutory rape has serious consequences #RAWTonight
2012-05-28 10:02:40 PM  
1 votes:
sign
PUNK: YES
BRYANT: NO

pushthepulldoor.com
2012-05-28 09:49:04 PM  
1 votes:
SIGN BREES sign in the crowd. Expected that, lol.
2012-05-28 09:41:55 PM  
1 votes:
Hey!

Heard you got beef!

NOM NOM NOM NOM!
2012-05-28 09:35:57 PM  
1 votes:
In other predetermined outcomes, Miami is beating Boston
2012-05-28 09:34:25 PM  
1 votes:

verbaltoxin: Eddie used to go balls deep on that woman.


And PWI still gave it 5 stars!
2012-05-28 09:26:08 PM  
1 votes:
Things show said to A-Ry's face

Wall.
2012-05-28 09:24:44 PM  
1 votes:
So...that was a non-title match. Was there any point to this?

/Also lo­l[nospam-﹫-backwards]ylle­Kyll­eK­y­lleK***San­tino manages to retain
2012-05-28 09:15:22 PM  
1 votes:

eddievercetti: Yep, Show is now Tommy Wiseau.

EVERYBODY BETRAY ME! I'M FED UP WITH THIS WORLD!


29.media.tumblr.com
YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, CENA!
2012-05-28 09:15:20 PM  
1 votes:
Rock was right years ago...people hear "well...its the big show" and think thank god a piss break
2012-05-28 09:14:38 PM  
1 votes:
Never thought I'd find myself longing for a 30-minute Triple H promo. And yet, here I am.
2012-05-28 09:04:25 PM  
1 votes:
In the words of Tyrion Lannister from last night "Oh, fark me"
2012-05-28 09:03:06 PM  
1 votes:
cdn.bleacherreport.net
2012-05-28 09:02:11 PM  
1 votes:
Hey, did you guys see me with the title in the intro?

Oh yeah. Every week.
2012-05-28 09:01:57 PM  
1 votes:
www.jimrlong.us
2012-05-28 08:51:02 PM  
1 votes:
One year ago, Daniel Bryan was a half-forgotten former US Champion who got bumped to the dark match at Wrestlemania 27.

This year he is a former World Champion whose 17 second job at Wrestlemania 28 made him more over than ever.

One year ago, Zack Ryder started a Youtube channel to make videos with his dad and buddies.

This year, oh, right. Guess I should've quit while I was ahead.
2012-05-28 08:38:07 PM  
1 votes:
CREATIVE HAS NOTHING FOR YOU!

Also, just wanted to mention that Chikarasaurus Rex: How to Hatch a Dinosaur is this Saturday. Check 'em out; you'll be glad you did.
2012-05-28 08:25:44 PM  
1 votes:
I am going to shove America down your throats, fWc. That may include appearances by Jim Duggan and Sgt. Slaughter, but is guaranteed to have appearances by John Cena. And you smarks are going to enjoy every minute of it.
2012-05-28 08:23:44 PM  
1 votes:
Are we gonna have a thread for impact this week since it's live?
 
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