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(Fark)   I'm thinking of using a non-sequitor to greet various people. I was thinking something like "Brother" or "Boss". Maybe "Man". What non-sequitors do you use or have used on you?   (fark.com) divider line 378
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2859 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 May 2012 at 8:58 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-28 10:58:31 AM  
Boy
 
2012-05-28 11:13:11 AM  

100 Watt Walrus: Mine departure line is, "I'm off like a herd of turtles."


Hah! That's one my grandfather would say.

He also enjoyed saying "Whiskey did it!" when someone sneezed, and when he was almost done with something, or we were nearing our destination on a trip, he would call, "'We made it!' the captain shouted."
 
2012-05-28 11:27:21 AM  
Grasshopper.
 
2012-05-28 11:44:59 AM  
Sweet titties or sugar britches, depending on if it's a man or a woman.
 
2012-05-28 12:31:36 PM  
Here in Nova Scotia there is only one way to address someone, especially if you're having a brain cramp and can't remember/don't know their name...Buddy!
 
2012-05-28 12:41:02 PM  
Cochese.

or

Kemosabe : It is sometimes translated as "trusty scout" or "faithful friend" in Potawatomi.
 
2012-05-28 12:53:09 PM  

Government Fromage: I have a habit of calling people "chief". Sometimes when I'm dealing with cops, they take it the wrong way.


How about Native people?
 
2012-05-28 01:39:58 PM  
I usually go with:
Slick, especially if the guy works at British Petroleum
Chief, if he works at a casino
Dude, if he is a cowboy

Ladies:
Huneybuns, if she works at Hostess
Babe, if she is affiliated with the bacon industry
Angel, if she has been diagnosed with a terminal condition


/no, not really
 
2012-05-28 01:53:26 PM  
Yo, Catdog.
 
2012-05-28 01:55:52 PM  
Seriously though, the best has to be 'Brother' (yes, with a capital B) when spoken between religious folk regardless of their faith.

As in, "hello, Brother," slow nod, strong eye contact, half-smile.

/learned to laugh at himself a long time back
 
2012-05-28 02:29:04 PM  
Hey there big shooter
 
2012-05-28 02:30:07 PM  
fruitcake and sizzlechest

listened to the jerky boys a little too much back in the day
 
2012-05-28 02:42:49 PM  
Waiters, store clerks, bartenders (especially bartenders) and such: "Doctor". Everyone else: "sir" or "miss" (unless older than my mum, which is getting increasingly rare) "ma'am".

This includes children; you can't teach respect without showing it yourself, can you.
 
2012-05-28 02:47:59 PM  
I say "sir" a lot, as in "what's farking crackin sir?". Although I've noticed police hate it, they think they are being mocked which I find hilarious because I'm not actually mocking them.
 
2012-05-28 02:50:47 PM  
Stupid shiat like this goes green but other worthy stuff doesn't. Guess I should be blowing the staff too.
 
2012-05-28 02:52:11 PM  
'Release the Kraken' works for most situations.
 
2012-05-28 03:07:37 PM  

rbaron71: I like calling everyone "sir", but in a casual way. Men or women, adult or children.


I had a funny result from this. I was in Atlanta at a tradeshow and a woman stopped me from going in a wrong entrance and I said "yes sir" sort of humorous/annoyed. She said "sir? it should be yes ma'am". But then she and the lady next to her got in an argument about it because the other one said she didn't like being called ma'am because it made her feel old -- they were both in their 20s so it was kinda funny. I admit that I wouldn't call anyone ma'am unless I was a waiter or something, does seem insulting somehow.

I definitely hate being called "hon" or "honey" by waitresses, also "chief" is pretty annoying.

Also, have any semantic police properly clarified what non-sequitur means?
 
2012-05-28 03:27:11 PM  
Throatwarbler Mangrove
 
2012-05-28 04:13:00 PM  

metamax: Kemosabe : It is sometimes translated as "trusty scout" or "faithful friend" in Potawatomi.


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-05-28 04:41:56 PM  

Worst Name I Ever Heard: Yo, [initial of first name]-Money

Example:
Jeff: "Hello there my friend Worst Name I Ever Heard"
me: "Yo, J-Money"


You think that's a joke?

Check this out

I address my work colleagues as "effendi".

/When I'm working in Turkey
 
2012-05-28 04:49:00 PM  

theorellior: 100 Watt Walrus: Mine departure line is, "I'm off like a herd of turtles."

Hah! That's one my grandfather would say.

He also enjoyed saying "Whiskey did it!" when someone sneezed, and when he was almost done with something, or we were nearing our destination on a trip, he would call, "'We made it!' the captain shouted."


Yeah, I got it from my dad, except he likes to it up, and usually says, "I'm off like a turd or hurdles." I think I'm turning into him.

/He also says, "I'm gonna go shake a tower" (take a shower), and a bunch of others like that
 
2012-05-28 05:25:37 PM  
For when people are leaving, I like to use "be seeing you," sometimes even with the wave from the show.

It's a reference so obscure that no one ever recognizes it, and it still works without knowing it's a reference at all.
 
2012-05-28 05:45:08 PM  
Everyone is f*g. Unless they are gay, in which case it's "bro"..

metamax: Cochese.

or

Kemosabe : It is sometimes translated as "trusty scout" or "faithful friend" in Potawatomi.


I've heard that "Tonto" is really Spanish for "fool" and "Kemosabe" is obliquely "Quien no sabes".. which is Spanish for "One who does not know".. basically, they're insulting each other..
 
2012-05-28 05:55:31 PM  
Chief or Sport. Or "what's the dill, pickle?"
 
2012-05-28 08:31:21 PM  
I call my son Dude-face. Luckily he's only 20 months old and can't tell me yet how ridiculous that sounds. Otherwise, I nearly invariably call people by just their last name.

In a fit of madness today we looked up a co-worker's name on one of those true-gangsta-name sites. I now refuse to call that skinny white guy anything except Stupid-Ass Jamaican.
 
2012-05-28 10:24:27 PM  
bot, chief, guy, ....
 
2012-05-29 01:07:47 AM  

GT_bike: ToxicMunkee: I still use "dude". I can't stop myself. God I hate the 80s.

Don't call me dude (obscure?)


A guy I worked with got chewed out by a judge for calling him "dude".
 
2012-05-29 10:46:40 AM  
When I see a buddy that looks stressed or depressed, I call them Smiley.

My dad was called Smiley, because he didn't.
 
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