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(RamblingBeachCat.com)   You're welcome, Class of 2012: Top 10 things no one tells high school graduates   (ramblingbeachcat.com) divider line 246
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28164 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 May 2012 at 9:23 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-05-27 10:39:35 AM

SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.


My son is graduating next week. He has chosen a 2 year technical school. He isn't cut out for traditional college.

He's got a friend, they've been friends since 6th grade. The boy sucks at school. At the beginning of this year, he was (credit wise) a Junior. He dropped out after missing soo much school that he was never going to catch up.
The boy is currently staying with us, as his Mom is having some personal trouble. (He's been here a week)
My kid and the Boy got into a fight last night, b/c my son was telling him that he needs to go back and graduate.
I guess the Boy said that no one is going to f-in make him f-in go back to f-in high school.

He's going to work at McDonalds (if, indeed, he works anywhere). He's already over 300 lbs.

I see him, at 40, being on tv for having died in his Mom's house of a massive heart attack, and the police having to tear down a wall to get him out.

Sad really.
 
2012-05-27 10:41:53 AM

WinoRhino: #17: If your weird roommate asks if his girlfriend from another dorm can stay in the room for a few days because she doesn't get along with her own roommate, say no. A few days will end up being all year.


Sorry about that, bro.

Also, #18: you'll probably get a war on your dick at some point.
 
2012-05-27 10:43:13 AM

Earpj: SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.

My son is graduating next week. He has chosen a 2 year technical school. He isn't cut out for traditional college.

He's got a friend, they've been friends since 6th grade. The boy sucks at school. At the beginning of this year, he was (credit wise) a Junior. He dropped out after missing soo much school that he was never going to catch up.
The boy is currently staying with us, as his Mom is having some personal trouble. (He's been here a week)
My kid and the Boy got into a fight last night, b/c my son was telling him that he needs to go back and graduate.
I guess the Boy said that no one is going to f-in make him f-in go back to f-in high school.

He's going to work at McDonalds (if, indeed, he works anywhere). He's already over 300 lbs.

I see him, at 40, being on tv for having died in his Mom's house of a massive heart attack, and the police having to tear down a wall to get him out.

Sad really.


Military. He doesn't need school, he needs military. It'll be the best decision of his life.
 
2012-05-27 10:43:45 AM
Wart. You'll probably get a WART on your dick. If you get a war on your dick. You've got other problems.
 
2012-05-27 10:43:46 AM
What about :

#11. That kid you made fun of who worked at McDonalds for the last two years and didn't go to college will likely be further ahead in life and better off. When you graduate and can't find a job, he will likely be a manager in one of the largest chains in the world making twice what you will at your first job. 10 years later you might catch up to him.
 
2012-05-27 10:45:02 AM

SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.


I left college fairly early early on, only completed two semesters. I loved the social environment of the school, but was unwilling to pay for the fun after realizing I wanted something totally different out of life. I decided that I wasn't college material, and I dropped out.

Oh, was my dad pissed. Mom was a bit calmer, but very concerned about my future. And now, 11 years later, I have a career that I love. I make slightly more money than most of my college-educated peers, but that's because they're getting screwed not because my job pays awesome. I don't owe my soul to a bank or the Dept of Education. I was the first of my high school friends to buy a house.

So really, my advice would be: Not all of you are college material. Recognize it early so you don't spend a fortune bouncing between majors, failing classes and ultimately dropping out/failing out. Research your options and come up with a solid plan on how to get where you want to be before quitting school.
 
2012-05-27 10:45:41 AM

Honest Bender: Sounds like he did it wrong. I didn't. We threw some awesome parties. It helped that my group of friends was the entire floor of our dorm building. You can have a lot of fun when the entire floor is in on everything.


My floor wasn't much for big parties (although those existed on campus), but most of my floor frequently had LAN parties. It was awesome having people throughout a floor all playing the same CounterStrike game with their doors open.


Here's one piece of advice for new dorm-dwellers: Be straightforward with your roommate as to what your door-locking policy is. I can't count how many times I came back to my room from class to find someone I didn't even know sitting on the floor playing PS2.
 
2012-05-27 10:45:59 AM

eas81: Your dorm is going to suck:

[www.collegetocareers.com image 450x338]


Damn I wish the dorms at Maryland looked that good. Fark Hagerstown Hall!!!
 
2012-05-27 10:47:03 AM

ExperianScaresCthulhu:

Military. He doesn't need school, he needs military. It'll be the best decision of his life.


If he's 300 lbs, I don't think the military would take him. But I do agree that it would be one of the better chances for him to learn how to be a productive citizen.
 
2012-05-27 10:48:25 AM

ExperianScaresCthulhu:

Military. He doesn't need school, he needs military. It'll be the best decision of his life.


We have one boy that we helped raise, who joined the Army, b/c my Hubby is in the Army.

I don't see this boy joining. He'd actually have to work to get down to an acceptable weight standard.
Not gonna happen.
He says that he wants to be a chef. Hubby and I figure that's just b.c saying that you want to be a Bum is frowned upon.
 
2012-05-27 10:48:47 AM
As someone who just graduated highschool, I'm really getting a kick...
 
2012-05-27 10:50:27 AM

Rockstone: As someone who just graduated highschool, I'm really getting a kick...


Congrats!

What do you wanna do with your life?
 
2012-05-27 10:52:42 AM

NeoCortex42: My floor wasn't much for big parties (although those existed on campus), but most of my floor frequently had LAN parties. It was awesome having people throughout a floor all playing the same CounterStrike game with their doors open.


My nerd buddies and I started a lan gaming club. And by club I mean an actual, factual college club. We got funding, had officers, the whole nine yards. Membership was something like $20 a semester. $3 door fee ($5 for non-members). We had T-shirts, some very mild industry sponsorship (helped pay for the pizza and Mt. Dew). Lots of fun. We held a 40-50 person LAN party once a month.
 
2012-05-27 10:52:46 AM
#19 Don't submit your blog to Fark, ever.
 
2012-05-27 10:52:52 AM
Who here is a squirrel? It's okay, don't be shy: squirrels are just as welcome to post their stupid thoughts on Fark as anyone else.

/Squirrelguythegodofsquirrels replies: 'Shut the (squeak) up.
 
2012-05-27 10:59:30 AM
encrypted-tbn3.google.com

www3.pictures.gi.zimbio.com

encrypted-tbn1.google.com

encrypted-tbn3.google.com

 
2012-05-27 11:00:40 AM

Earpj: Rockstone: As someone who just graduated highschool, I'm really getting a kick...

Congrats!

What do you wanna do with your life?


For one, get a degree in Computer Science xD
 
2012-05-27 11:00:42 AM
Top #1 thing people tell high school graduates (namely parents):

"Oh, gee, all those years we allowed you to be a selfish, lazy douchebag and get away with murder in school while we made your teachers' lives hell, arguing out of zeros and low test scores and unnecessary absences, arguing that your juvenile behavior was simply you "expressing yourself," and how dare they oppress you, have left you utterly incapable of surviving a month in college, and completely unhireable. [Here's your key to the basement and some cash] OR [Get out and enjoy being a meth addict]."
 
2012-05-27 11:00:47 AM
i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-05-27 11:02:05 AM

Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 550x550]


I farking hated that "song".
 
2012-05-27 11:03:24 AM

Sudlow: 9. University parking police Many people you will meet in the course of your working life are soulless, terrible people that will do everything in their power to make your life miserable.


Amen. I work with a guy who makes it his job to tattle to the boss whenever he doesn't think i'm working on something important, or taking a break or make a mistake. Its funny because he's the same one who doesn't do the work we're asked to do if it involves leaving the building, I do all of that.
 
2012-05-27 11:03:52 AM
Here's one piece of advice for new dorm-dwellers: Be straightforward with your roommate as to what your door-locking policy is. I can't count how many times I came back to my room from class to find someone I didn't even know sitting on the floor playing PS2.


I dunno Neo, I removed the springs from the door closer (you know the arm with the elbow on the top right of a door, then propped door open with a 40 pound dumbbell. The only time that door was ever closed was when Authoritah were near.

i had a pretty sick room-mate though, first thing he did when my father and I were moving my stuff in (i was one legged at the time) was offer us both a beer. I was going to turn it down, but the ol' man gave me a 'dont be a pussy look' and i've never looked back...

there was a ps2 in there i think, but he rarely used it... if you find yourself playing video games in university, drop out or understand that those are wasted moments where you could be out conquering the world.

i dont know who said it earlier, but definitely don't settle for below your standards, at least in public, once you establish a precedent, you're going to have to purge your fb and switch schools to change it.

the frat i found myself in eventually was another story...

/only problem with the open door policy was having to get to a solid cleaning schedule with the party hardy roomate
//two times a week clean the bathroom alternating
///cleansiliest bathroom in the rez, chicks dig it, you don't feel gross when you pass out worshipping the porcelain throne
////oh, and $1500 damages to the room.
 
2012-05-27 11:04:46 AM

Rockstone:

For one, get a degree in Computer Science xD


Nice. What comes after?

My son graduates next week. He's going to a 2 yr program for the art side (not programming, cause he sucks at math) for 3D animation.


/I was waiting for "I wanna ROCK!"
 
2012-05-27 11:04:54 AM
that first bit was supposed to be a quote, "here's one... .. playing PS2."
 
2012-05-27 11:07:05 AM
The squirrels at BC are vicious. Usually they'll just take your wallet if they corner you alone. Once they get a taste for human blood though...
 
2012-05-27 11:08:52 AM
I am just astonished how everyone takes it as a given that the next logical step after graduating high school is college. It used to be that only a selct few who sought a career in a field that required some academic background needed to go to college. You had learned enough in school for the rest of the jobs out there. Nowadays college is pretty much the only option for most graduates and most of them don't do it to actually learn anything but to get a peace of paper that supposedly enhances their prospects of finding a job.

The system is broken.
 
2012-05-27 11:09:42 AM
You will not start a job at 75k a year plus benefits. You won't even start at 45k, you'll be lucky to find work at Wal-mart at minimum wage working for a guy who barely speaks English and hates you like poison. Count yourself lucky, because chuckles. You're not a precious snow flake. I don't care about you. The world doesn't care about you. I'd rather see you fail, because that means I get a little further ahead of you. You're a threat to me being younger, and that means you're a threat to my job, my family, my way of life. And I'll do anything to protect that. Meaning you're the newbie. You haven't paid your dues, and just as soon as you give up and move back in with mom and dad, means there's one less pointless over confident smart mouth asswipe I have to deal with, and that makes my life easier.

That's the way of the real world. Get used to it.

PS, Think life is hard at 20? Try it at 45 and having to fight for your career (which has changed 3 times already since graduating university 23 years ago) the entire time in an ever changing work world. You'll be as cynical, nasty, and uncaring as the rest of us in no time flat.
 
2012-05-27 11:10:00 AM

LadyBelgara: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 550x550]

I farking hated that "song".


But everything in it is true
 
2012-05-27 11:13:09 AM

SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.


I agree - many aren't college material. Personally I skipped the whole mess. However - I haven't made less than six figures a year since I turned 25 (that was 15 years ago) and the only time I wear a paper hat is when we declare pirate day.

/ironically - recessions are always my best years
 
2012-05-27 11:14:05 AM

Dr_Gene: SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and many of you who are, nevertheless, will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.

/FTFY


That "nevertheless" appears completely superfluous to me. Plus you forgot the comma that should be placed after "college material" (though inside the endquote).
 
2012-05-27 11:16:56 AM

Earpj: My son graduates next week. He's going to a 2 yr program for the art side (not programming, cause he sucks at math) for 3D animation.


So do I. Calculus was the only class in high school I failed. But you don't need math in most areas of Information Technology these days.

/finally took a college course in calculus last year just so I can say I passed it
 
2012-05-27 11:17:05 AM

Salt Lick Steady: Dr_Gene: SomeCallMeTim: #11. Not all of you are "college material" and many of you who are, nevertheless, will wind up wearing a paper hat and name tag asking people if they want fries with that.

/FTFY

That "nevertheless" appears completely superfluous to me. Plus you forgot the comma that should be placed after "college material" (though inside the endquote).


Nevermind, I see what you were trying to convey. Though I stand by my comma snark.
 
2012-05-27 11:17:13 AM
Stupid article is stupid.

HS graduation != attending college
 
2012-05-27 11:18:47 AM

indarwinsshadow: PS, Think life is hard at 20? Try it at 45 and having to fight for your career (which has changed 3 times already since graduating university 23 years ago) the entire time in an ever changing work world. You'll be as cynical, nasty, and uncaring as the rest of us in no time flat.


I've changed my career three times and love it. Perhaps the problem is you just hate change. Some of us thrive on it.
 
2012-05-27 11:19:21 AM
Realize that you will not be an M.D. after you fail your first organic chemistry test. Set your standards low and you won't be disappointed. Well.... Maybe....
 
2012-05-27 11:20:05 AM
And here I am trying to get a PhD...

99: Every major and career sucks. Your life as you know it ends at 18. Might as well off yourself instead of spending the next fifty years working your arse off for subsistence with your corporate masters get rich.
 
2012-05-27 11:22:32 AM

Loki-L: Nowadays college is pretty much the only option for most graduates and most of them don't do it to actually learn anything but to get a peace of paper that supposedly enhances their prospects of finding a job.


Agreed. Can't tell you how many dumb-as-rocks sociology/criminology-type majors there who were barely literate and would have been much better off attending trade school. People often mocked my decision to major in philosophy, but it was an excellent stepping stone to law school.
 
2012-05-27 11:28:57 AM
Ok, here it goes:

I was told by a teacher in High School, weeks before graduation, that the most important part of college was to have fun. It didn't matter he said if I graduated with a 4.0 or a 2.0, the degree would be the same. He was right.

I joined a Fraternity the first week I was in school, was heavily involved in Student Government, had a job, and almost never went to class. It was the absolute best time of my life and I ended up graduating with a 2.0 G.P.A.

Flash forward 15 years, I now make more than 5 times the national average for wages and can look back on those days without a single regret. In the end, it wasn't my grade point that determined my future, it was my drive.

My last piece of advice: go to school by the beach. The chicks there put out and are gorgeous.


/UCSB alum
 
2012-05-27 11:29:00 AM

kukukupo: What about :

#11. That kid you made fun of who worked at McDonalds for the last two years and didn't go to college will likely be further ahead in life and better off. When you graduate and can't find a job, he will likely be a manager in one of the largest chains in the world making twice what you will at your first job. 10 years later you might catch up to him.


You really bought that McDonald's orientation video hook-line-and-sinker, didn't you?
 
2012-05-27 11:30:56 AM

gingerjet: Earpj: My son graduates next week. He's going to a 2 yr program for the art side (not programming, cause he sucks at math) for 3D animation.

So do I. Calculus was the only class in high school I failed. But you don't need math in most areas of Information Technology these days.

/finally took a college course in calculus last year just so I can say I passed it


He's passing pre-cal. Barely. Has to have a 73 to get credit for the year, cause he failed last semester.
His chosen degree has a general math class. He can do that.

Kicks butt at English and History, tho.
 
2012-05-27 11:31:11 AM
#1 If you or your parents are "OK" with you going $90,000 in debt to become a Social Worker, you are all morons. Get a real education that earns money, then help out at the homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or even Habitat for humanity.
 
2012-05-27 11:33:58 AM

Rockstone: Earpj: Rockstone: As someone who just graduated highschool, I'm really getting a kick...

Congrats!

What do you wanna do with your life?

For one, get a degree in Computer Science xD


No offense to CS, but it seems like if you wanted to head down a programming route, go into Computer Engineering. It mixes EE with CS and have an engineering degree to boot.
 
2012-05-27 11:34:01 AM
If you're an undergrad and do bad on a test or get a bad grade in a course, do not allow your parents to complain to the prof on your behalf. It does not help you. It only works to annoy the instructor and make them go from probably not knowing who you are to actively disliking you.

One interesting thing about going to grad school is seeing the undergrad experience from the faculty perspective. Teaching is just busy work between research time.
 
2012-05-27 11:34:56 AM
2. Squirrels on college campuses have absolutely no fear of humans.

THIS.
Don't know about the rest
 
2012-05-27 11:35:27 AM

gingerjet: indarwinsshadow: PS, Think life is hard at 20? Try it at 45 and having to fight for your career (which has changed 3 times already since graduating university 23 years ago) the entire time in an ever changing work world. You'll be as cynical, nasty, and uncaring as the rest of us in no time flat.

I've changed my career three times and love it. Perhaps the problem is you just hate change. Some of us thrive on it.



I just erased my first answer because I don't want to get in trouble where I work now, but lets say you don't always have a choice on career changes. Tech is a fickle beast, and the 00's were a brutal time to work any type of IT job. I love the job I have now, and plan on keeping it until I retire. It's 180 degrees from where I started, but it's a good fit.

My advice is realistic though. Too many people try and start at the top and think something's owed to them. Life sorts that out quickly. It's a hard lesson, but a lot of younger people haven't a clue what they're in store for. Luck plays as much in your career as your intelligence and hard work.
 
2012-05-27 11:36:11 AM

Morrius: And here I am trying to get a PhD...

99: Every major and career sucks. Your life as you know it ends at 18. Might as well off yourself instead of spending the next fifty years working your arse off for subsistence with your corporate masters get rich.


Don't get a PhD and then join the glorious career of start-up companies*

*people networking skills required
 
2012-05-27 11:36:55 AM

Begoggle: 2. Squirrels on college campuses have absolutely no fear of humans.

THIS.
Don't know about the rest


I had a lab partner my freshman year who had a horrible run-in with a campus squirrel. The guy walks into lab a couple minutes late with one of the pant legs of his jeans completely shredded. I asked him what the fark happened to him. His response: "Crazy squirrel".
 
2012-05-27 11:37:21 AM

SumDumGit: #1 If you or your parents are "OK" with you going $90,000 in debt to become a Social Worker, you are all morons. Get a real education that earns money, then help out at the homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or even Habitat for humanity.


"Social Worker" has to be one of the most confusing career paths in existence. I believe it usually requires a Master's Degree, and it pays less than some non-skilled labor. I recognize that it might be rewarding from an ethical perspective (though dealing with the welfare cheats day-in and day-out would kill my soul pretty quickly), but it amounts to volunteering for near-poverty-level salary through the path of most resistance. I hope somebody is telling people going into this field the reality of the situation at some point.
 
2012-05-27 11:39:45 AM
11.) If you got a technical degree, the degree teaches you the tools to succeed but doesn't teach you all the details. Be prepared to learn outside of your job and read a lot of white papers if you want to really impress folks and stay current.
 
2012-05-27 11:39:53 AM

SumDumGit: #1 If you or your parents are "OK" with you going $90,000 in debt to become a Social Worker, you are all morons. Get a real education that earns money, then help out at the homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or even Habitat for humanity.


Meh. And still we need social workers. Do what your personality dictates. You get to an age where you realize money isn't everything.

/accountant.
 
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